The Most Interesting Man in the world would probably be an excellent wingman when he was around. And the rest of the time, he probably wouldn't even be there- absentee roommates are the best roommates
+6
Raijin QuickfootI'm your Huckleberry YOU'RE NO DAISYRegistered User, ClubPAregular
I feel like the Hamburger Helper glove would accidentally walk in on you masturbating one day and then everything would get really super weird for a couple of months before he moved out
tbh the only advertising characters I remember with any fidelity are the ones from Australia in the 90s
so my options are Bing Lee and Jan from those Yellow Pages ads. Oh, and those weird suicidal eggs from the sunscreen ad.
I'm going with Jan, she seems easily cowed.
Captain Morgan is a quick choice since same first name, but probably Jack from Jack in the Box. Seems responsible and I imagine he would be rooming with me after a messy divorce so kids only every other weekend.
Or maybe Buzz from Honey Nut Cheerios. Honey bees arent that annoying or dangerous and dont take up much room.
He's a shy overambitious dog-catcher on the wrong side of the law. She's an orphaned psychic mercenary with the power to bend men's minds. They fight crime!
The Energizer Bunny, he keeps you awake at night, I have no idea why someone would pick this
hear me out: the energizer bunny can charge all your devices and keep the party going all night long.
canonically stronger than darth vader, also, so he'll keep you safe.
+2
RingoHe/Hima distinct lack of substanceRegistered Userregular
Mr. Clean, the house and bathroom are always clean
tbh the only advertising characters I remember with any fidelity are the ones from Australia in the 90s
so my options are Bing Lee and Jan from those Yellow Pages ads. Oh, and those weird suicidal eggs from the sunscreen ad.
I'm going with Jan, she seems easily cowed.
wherever the toilet paper bears live it is far too close for comfort
Those Dr-Moreau monstrosities - half-wittedly aping the social rituals of mankind by creating fetish objects from disposable tree mulch - should have been put out of their misery and fired into the heart of Jupiter years ago.
edit: I only came across these creatures in the last two months when Hulu suddenly plonked them into their ad breaks, so this trauma is still very fresh for me.
It never gets better. I have hated those miserable scat beasts since I was a child, and every time I see them the loathing is sharp and sparkling.
I have a theory that if we could isolate and deactivate the gene interactions responsible for finding those bears 'cute' or 'appealing' or 'vaguely tolerable', humanity would become instantly 60% less idiotic and fucked up.
I admit it's not founded on very much, but i think it's worth trying.
Posts
The Maui onion chip guy. Look how cool he is!
Coolness is the only factor that matters in a roommate.
The fucking Hamburger Helper Hand can GET IT
https://www.amazon.com/gp/registry/wishlist/1JI9WWSRW1YJI
https://www.amazon.com/gp/registry/wishlist/1JI9WWSRW1YJI
The State Farm jingle is what teleports you, not the agents
And he knows Garfield.
so my options are Bing Lee and Jan from those Yellow Pages ads. Oh, and those weird suicidal eggs from the sunscreen ad.
I'm going with Jan, she seems easily cowed.
Let me wear my shoes in my own house Mr. Clean.
I worry he'd be one of those guys with weekly Chore Charts. I had a roommate like that and would NOT do that again.
Or maybe Buzz from Honey Nut Cheerios. Honey bees arent that annoying or dangerous and dont take up much room.
Captain Morgan is a PUA at best
canonically stronger than darth vader, also, so he'll keep you safe.
But if we're going with actual proper choices, I'd room with the Mum from the below milk ad.
He seems like a decent fellow, plus he has the Nespresso machine, so you’re all set if you ever feel like three-sevenths of a cup of coffee.
https://www.amazon.com/gp/registry/wishlist/1JI9WWSRW1YJI
wherever the toilet paper bears live it is far too close for comfort
Those Dr-Moreau monstrosities - half-wittedly aping the social rituals of mankind by creating fetish objects from disposable tree mulch - should have been put out of their misery and fired into the heart of Jupiter years ago.
edit: I only came across these creatures in the last two months when Hulu suddenly plonked them into their ad breaks, so this trauma is still very fresh for me.
I have a theory that if we could isolate and deactivate the gene interactions responsible for finding those bears 'cute' or 'appealing' or 'vaguely tolerable', humanity would become instantly 60% less idiotic and fucked up.
I admit it's not founded on very much, but i think it's worth trying.
https://www.amazon.com/gp/registry/wishlist/1JI9WWSRW1YJI