Quarantimes 2: Quarantine Harder

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Posts

  • AistanAistan Tiny Bat Registered User regular
    Oh, handstand on the beach/mountaintop

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    chr1sh4ll3ttb3
  • ZonugalZonugal The Holiday Armadillo I'm Santa's representative for all the southern states. And Mexico!Registered User regular
    Usagi wrote: »
    Mortal Sky wrote: »
    Usagi wrote: »
    Solar wrote: »
    I've drunk half a bottle of wine and installed tinder for a laugh

    Should I be applying for jobs? Yes. Am I? Get fucked

    For every profile that has a Machu Picchu or Ibiza photo, you have to chug

    I don't know if this is as much a thing for girls in the North of England but around here on the east coast of the US, I feel like I see a ton of the Cliffs of Moher as well

    My full list for PNW Tinder (the drinking game, bi-edition), drink if you see:
    • Pose with fish
    • Pose with BIPOC child while travelling
    • Pose with tiger/lion/other sedated wildlife
    • Pose with weapon
    • Bikini pose while walking away on a sandy beach
    • A Lambo/Porsche/other supercar you're inferring is yours but probably isn't
    • Selfie on Machu Picchu/other indigenous site
    • Selfie while blazing

    This doesn't even include rules for items within a profile's written bio.
    • Hiking
    • Football culture
    • Jesus/Christianity
    • Looking for a "unicorn"
    • The Office reference
    • Harry Potter house designation

    Ross-Geller-Prime-Sig-A.jpg
    Usagi
  • AistanAistan Tiny Bat Registered User regular
    Dating me is like biting into a chocolate chip cookie, finding out it's oatmeal raisin, then realizing two hours later it's an edible.

    steam_sig.png
    Magic PinkDepressperadoBahamutZERO
  • UsagiUsagi Nah Registered User regular
    edited September 16
    Other honorable mentions that I don't include else I would actually get alcohol poisoning: camo clothing, pictures of their truck, gym selfies where it's obvious they missed leg day, duck lips, and my personal favorite--the naked headless torso.

    Usagi on
    Doodmannwebguy20tynic3clipseMagic PinksarukunTynnanchr1sh4ll3ttb3Label
  • DoodmannDoodmann Registered User regular
    Zonugal wrote: »
    Usagi wrote: »
    Mortal Sky wrote: »
    Usagi wrote: »
    Solar wrote: »
    I've drunk half a bottle of wine and installed tinder for a laugh

    Should I be applying for jobs? Yes. Am I? Get fucked

    For every profile that has a Machu Picchu or Ibiza photo, you have to chug

    I don't know if this is as much a thing for girls in the North of England but around here on the east coast of the US, I feel like I see a ton of the Cliffs of Moher as well

    My full list for PNW Tinder (the drinking game, bi-edition), drink if you see:
    • Pose with fish
    • Pose with BIPOC child while travelling
    • Pose with tiger/lion/other sedated wildlife
    • Pose with weapon
    • Bikini pose while walking away on a sandy beach
    • A Lambo/Porsche/other supercar you're inferring is yours but probably isn't
    • Selfie on Machu Picchu/other indigenous site
    • Selfie while blazing

    This doesn't even include rules for items within a profile's written bio.
    • Hiking
    • Football culture
    • Jesus/Christianity
    • Looking for a "unicorn"
    • The Office reference
    • Harry Potter house designation

    The number of people that listed re-watching The Office as a hobby was baffling.

    Whippy wrote: »
    nope nope nope nope abort abort talk about anime
    Torchlight | Steam | ART
    QuantumTurkMortal SkyOrca
  • JuggernutJuggernut Registered User regular
    I love tequila and tacos and the office.

    My dog is cuter than you.

    Zonugal
  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Usagi wrote: »
    Other honorable mentions that I don't include else I would actually get alcohol poisoning: camo clothing, pictures of their truck, gym selfies where it's obvious they missed leg day, duck lips, and my personal favorite--the naked headless torso.

    Oh God duck lips yes.

    Especially when they have four photos with exactly the same pose to the point where they could have just photoshopped one image in four different backgrounds for the same effect

    Twitch Channel
    Steam: munkus_beaver
    Humor can be dissected, as a frog can, but it dies in the process.
    http://www.ccfa.org/
  • ZonugalZonugal The Holiday Armadillo I'm Santa's representative for all the southern states. And Mexico!Registered User regular
    Usagi wrote: »
    Other honorable mentions that I don't include else I would actually get alcohol poisoning: camo clothing, pictures of their truck, gym selfies where it's obvious they missed leg day, duck lips, and my personal favorite--the naked headless torso.

    Oh, you mean 75% of Grindr!?!?

    Ross-Geller-Prime-Sig-A.jpg
    UsagiNarbusMagic Pink
  • AistanAistan Tiny Bat Registered User regular
    Otters hold hands when they sleep so they don't drift apart.

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    Depressperado
  • StraightziStraightzi Here we may reign secure, and in my choice, To reign is worth ambition though in HellRegistered User regular
    I have a couple of Chicago specific ones that I like to add in, but that list seems just about right to me.

  • UsagiUsagi Nah Registered User regular
    Zonugal wrote: »
    Usagi wrote: »
    Other honorable mentions that I don't include else I would actually get alcohol poisoning: camo clothing, pictures of their truck, gym selfies where it's obvious they missed leg day, duck lips, and my personal favorite--the naked headless torso.

    Oh, you mean 75% of Grindr!?!?

    Bonus points if the only thing in their profile is their kik username

    Zonugal
  • JuggernutJuggernut Registered User regular
    Venmo me $5 for a surprise

  • JuggernutJuggernut Registered User regular
    The surprise is you have less money now

    Magic PinkJansonMrMonroeBahamutZEROOrca
  • SolarSolar Registered User regular
    For me it'd be, mentioning brunch, gin, travelling, Harry Potter and "please don't be boring"

  • SolarSolar Registered User regular
    Sorry ladies I'm just super fucking boring so

    DoodmannMaddocZonugalAistan3clipseshoeboxjeddyMagic PinkJansonsarukunTynnanVegemyteOrca
  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Juggernut wrote: »
    The surprise is you have less money now

    Jokes on you, I’m in debt!

    Twitch Channel
    Steam: munkus_beaver
    Humor can be dissected, as a frog can, but it dies in the process.
    http://www.ccfa.org/
  • PlatyPlaty Registered User regular
    For me it's

    sunglasses
    sunglasses
    sunglasses

  • PiptheFairPiptheFair Registered User regular
    Solar wrote: »
    For me it'd be, mentioning brunch, gin, travelling, Harry Potter and "please don't be boring"

    "please don't be boring"

    look, if you wanna go sky-diving or whatever, I'm out

    but if you want me to talk at length about how inaccurate combat is in movies about the middle ages, then get fucking ready

    Xaquin3clipsewebguy20Magic PinkOghulksarukunJayKaoschr1sh4ll3ttb3BahamutZEROLabelVegemyteHappy Little Machine
  • SolarSolar Registered User regular
    edited September 16
    I mean

    I think I'm quite an interesting person to talk to really

    And so maybe I'm what they want

    But if they put that in their profile they definitely aren't what I want i.e they're a dickhead

    Solar on
    JansonBahamutZERO
  • QuantumTurkQuantumTurk Registered User regular
    Aistan wrote: »
    Dating me is like biting into a chocolate chip cookie, finding out it's oatmeal raisin, then realizing two hours later it's an edible.

    I dunno if this is a reference but...I'd take a shot on that one.

  • JuggernutJuggernut Registered User regular
    edited September 16
    Dating me is like an entry level job: god you don't really want it but your options are limited for the time being so you tough it out for about 6 months until you can figure something else out.

    Edit: then you steal all of the staplers and sharpies before you dip out.

    Juggernut on
  • FearghaillFearghaill If there is nothing but what we make in this world let us make goodRegistered User regular
    Punch Up The Jam already gave us the template for the perfect tinder bio

    Magic PinkXaquin
  • 3clipse3clipse I will build a labyrinth to house the cheese Registered User regular
    Seriously though why is it Machu Picchu specifically that all these people are so obsessed with????

  • PiptheFairPiptheFair Registered User regular
    3clipse wrote: »
    Seriously though why is it Machu Picchu specifically that all these people are so obsessed with????

    peru is hot

    it's one of the last "lost cities" white people found (natives were tending some of the terraces there when bingham was taken there"

    UsagiDoodmann
  • TefTef Registered User regular
    In my wife's extended circle of friends are the most vapid, pretentious and utterly boring people I have ever had the misfortune of meeting.

    Their social media games are (were?) very strong and it caused my wife a lot of angst. She would see the latest holidays snaps on insta and feel like we were wasting or lives away in comparison.

    I have been vindicated during this lockdown. Their personalities consisted of nothing else but drinking cocktails in expensive beach clubs, swanning about tourist traps in exotic locales, and name dropping D list celebrities. Now it's just them sitting around their parents' houses complaining that the travel restrictions are unfair

    Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better

    bit.ly/2XQM1ke
    chr1sh4ll3ttb3VegemyteVivixenne
  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver Registered User, ClubPA regular
    3clipse wrote: »
    Seriously though why is it Machu Picchu specifically that all these people are so obsessed with????

    Because it evolves into Machu Pikachu.

    Twitch Channel
    Steam: munkus_beaver
    Humor can be dissected, as a frog can, but it dies in the process.
    http://www.ccfa.org/
    Commander ZoomMagic PinkmightyjongyoCrippl3JedocXaquinOghulksarukunTynnansponoMaddocSporkAndrewVegemyteSnicketysnickIronKnuckle's GhostDoodmannHappy Little Machine
  • WeaverWeaver Who are you? What do you want?Registered User regular
    This is all just reminding me of

    ElTL7ou.jpg
    Xaquinchromdom
  • MadicanMadican No face Registered User regular
    The one time I put a profile on a dating app the only photos were of me standing awkwardly in front of the closet mirror holding the phone up while deliberately excluding my head.

    Prime material right there.

    camo_sig2.png
    PSN: AuthorFrost
    mageofstorm.png
  • sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    Zonugal wrote: »
    Usagi wrote: »
    Mortal Sky wrote: »
    Usagi wrote: »
    Solar wrote: »
    I've drunk half a bottle of wine and installed tinder for a laugh

    Should I be applying for jobs? Yes. Am I? Get fucked

    For every profile that has a Machu Picchu or Ibiza photo, you have to chug

    I don't know if this is as much a thing for girls in the North of England but around here on the east coast of the US, I feel like I see a ton of the Cliffs of Moher as well

    My full list for PNW Tinder (the drinking game, bi-edition), drink if you see:
    • Pose with fish
    • Pose with BIPOC child while travelling
    • Pose with tiger/lion/other sedated wildlife
    • Pose with weapon
    • Bikini pose while walking away on a sandy beach
    • A Lambo/Porsche/other supercar you're inferring is yours but probably isn't
    • Selfie on Machu Picchu/other indigenous site
    • Selfie while blazing

    This doesn't even include rules for items within a profile's written bio.
    • Hiking
    • Football culture
    • Jesus/Christianity
    • Looking for a "unicorn"
    • The Office reference
    • Harry Potter house designation

    Dating in America seems exhausting.

    WeaverJansonRanlinDoodmann
  • AistanAistan Tiny Bat Registered User regular
    Aistan wrote: »
    Dating me is like biting into a chocolate chip cookie, finding out it's oatmeal raisin, then realizing two hours later it's an edible.

    I dunno if this is a reference but...I'd take a shot on that one.

    I assume it's a reference because I see it verbatim all the time.

    steam_sig.png
  • Magic PinkMagic Pink Tur-Boner-Fed Registered User regular
    Usagi wrote: »
    Other honorable mentions that I don't include else I would actually get alcohol poisoning: camo clothing, pictures of their truck, gym selfies where it's obvious they missed leg day, duck lips, and my personal favorite--the naked headless torso.

    jesus it's a wonder we manage to reproduce at all

  • PiptheFairPiptheFair Registered User regular
    Magic Pink wrote: »
    Usagi wrote: »
    Other honorable mentions that I don't include else I would actually get alcohol poisoning: camo clothing, pictures of their truck, gym selfies where it's obvious they missed leg day, duck lips, and my personal favorite--the naked headless torso.

    jesus it's a wonder we manage to reproduce at all

    Reproduce?

    BahamutZEROOrca
  • sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    Sex, Pip.

  • PiptheFairPiptheFair Registered User regular
    sarukun wrote: »
    Sex, Pip.

    ????

    Crippl33clipseMunkus BeaverAistanMagic PinkshoeboxjeddyBahamutZEROVegemyteOrca
  • 3clipse3clipse I will build a labyrinth to house the cheese Registered User regular
    What does the number six have to do with anything?

  • DepressperadoDepressperado I just wanted to see you laughing in the pizza rainRegistered User regular
    no, sax.

  • JedocJedoc Once to start a new life and once just to start a fireRegistered User regular
    Now don't start that again

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    KwoaruXaquinmrpakuMunkus BeaverMagic PinksarukunshoeboxjeddyhonovereVegemyteOrca
  • chr1sh4ll3ttb3chr1sh4ll3ttb3 A dagger in the dark is worth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered User regular
    Straightzi wrote: »
    I have a couple of Chicago specific ones that I like to add in, but that list seems just about right to me.

    Trenchcoat, tommy gun, and barrels of illegal whiskey?

  • StraightziStraightzi Here we may reign secure, and in my choice, To reign is worth ambition though in HellRegistered User regular
    Straightzi wrote: »
    I have a couple of Chicago specific ones that I like to add in, but that list seems just about right to me.

    Trenchcoat, tommy gun, and barrels of illegal whiskey?

    I wish

    tynic3clipseZonugalUsagichr1sh4ll3ttb3
  • AistanAistan Tiny Bat Registered User regular
    The Cloud Gate is universal, I see that more than the wall of gum in Seattle or that room in the Sears Tower with the glass floor.

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