"Some people here on Facebook Marketplace will try to sell you a Washing Machine. Other folks will sell you a Dryer. I'm here to say 'Fuck them and their single-use machinery!' This machine will do all those things in half the space. You want to wash that anime bodypillow? DONE. You want to dry a pair of JNCOs? DONE. You want to put your towels in on one side to throw off the load and make the machine a home mechanical bull? Ride away my friend, I'm not here to judge you. Contactless pickup available, although I'm also available for repeated prolonged uncomfortable hug pickup if that's your thing."
"Some people here on Facebook Marketplace will try to sell you a Washing Machine. Other folks will sell you a Dryer. I'm here to say 'Fuck them and their single-use machinery!' This machine will do all those things in half the space. You want to wash that anime bodypillow? DONE. You want to dry a pair of JNCOs? DONE. You want to put your towels in on one side to throw off the load and make the machine a home mechanical bull? Ride away my friend, I'm not here to judge you. Contactless pickup available, although I'm also available for repeated prolonged uncomfortable hug pickup if that's your thing."
It's ACTUALY a trans-dimensional dirt teleporter.
You put dirty things in, and they come out clean.
Where does the dirt go?
Nobody knows, but judging by your power bills when you run this thing, it's AT LEAST two dimensions away, if not three!
if you've never vaped in your washing machine you should definitely mention that in the ad
But if you've ever accidentally washed your vape pen, make sure to mention it. Sadly, Washer Dryer combos are highly susceptible to addiction, and the future family of your washing machine should be aware that they may be expected to support a three cartridge a week habit.
+2
3cl1ps3I will build a labyrinth to house the cheeseRegistered Userregular
Wait, you can vape places other than a washing machine?
Munkus BeaverYou don't have to attend every argument you are invited to.Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPAregular
What you need to do is highlight the rare qualities of your specific washing machine.
Example:
I need to know why "Never vaped in" took precedence in this ad over the mileage on the vehicle.
It’s a WRX. The default assumption is that it was owned by a vape lord
I actually had no idea about this stereotype but it all makes sense now
My assistant drives a WRX and absolutely vapes/smokes. His car is in pristine condition (worth more than what he bought it for, for a couple of reasons), but I’m betting he’s vaped in it. His car is commented on/beloved by all the employees at work and yup, everyone vapes
He said he drove to view another WRX his roommate was looking to buy this weekend and the interior was trashed from someone smoking/vaping in it
What you need to do is highlight the rare qualities of your specific washing machine.
Example:
I need to know why "Never vaped in" took precedence in this ad over the mileage on the vehicle.
It’s a WRX. The default assumption is that it was owned by a vape lord
I actually had no idea about this stereotype but it all makes sense now
My assistant drives a WRX and absolutely vapes/smokes. His car is in pristine condition (worth more than what he bought it for, for a couple of reasons), but I’m betting he’s vaped in it. His car is commented on/beloved by all the employees at work and yup, everyone vapes
He said he drove to view another WRX his roommate was looking to buy this weekend and the interior was trashed from someone smoking/vaping in it
Used to drive a WRX and have never vaped.
So it's probably just me and the guy selling that one. When I sold mine the first question out of the guy that bought it was "has it ever been smoked in." Of course he didn't know how to drive a manual transmission car soooooo he probably smoked the transmission in it, but still doesn't count as a vape.
"zip, i dunno what it is about you, but there's something very cat-like about your face. i can't really place it. you'd make a good mountain lion." Hail, Satan!Satans Post
+1
Lost Salientblink twiceif you'd like me to mercy kill youRegistered Userregular
Posts
Example:
It's ACTUALY a trans-dimensional dirt teleporter.
You put dirty things in, and they come out clean.
Where does the dirt go?
Nobody knows, but judging by your power bills when you run this thing, it's AT LEAST two dimensions away, if not three!
I need to know why "Never vaped in" took precedence in this ad over the mileage on the vehicle.
But if you've ever accidentally washed your vape pen, make sure to mention it. Sadly, Washer Dryer combos are highly susceptible to addiction, and the future family of your washing machine should be aware that they may be expected to support a three cartridge a week habit.
Anywhere that it's not expressly forbidden by a minimum of three signs.
Absolutely!
Staten Island strip clubs, Long Beach Lamborghini dealerships, and the state of Queensland, Australia.
absolute goddamn legend
It’s a WRX. The default assumption is that it was owned by a vape lord
Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better
bit.ly/2XQM1ke
name the washer and give it lore
Satans..... hints.....
Satans..... hints.....
charisma is the dump stat
Somebody has never heard the Legend of the Washing Machine Bard.
Yeah, legendary in that by the time I’m through with them there’ll be no proof of them ever having fucking existed.
Steam // Secret Satan
I actually had no idea about this stereotype but it all makes sense now
My assistant drives a WRX and absolutely vapes/smokes. His car is in pristine condition (worth more than what he bought it for, for a couple of reasons), but I’m betting he’s vaped in it. His car is commented on/beloved by all the employees at work and yup, everyone vapes
He said he drove to view another WRX his roommate was looking to buy this weekend and the interior was trashed from someone smoking/vaping in it
I already sold it to Tef for $4 I'm afraid
I should have asked for a flat commission instead of 12%
Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better
bit.ly/2XQM1ke
Used to drive a WRX and have never vaped.
So it's probably just me and the guy selling that one. When I sold mine the first question out of the guy that bought it was "has it ever been smoked in." Of course he didn't know how to drive a manual transmission car soooooo he probably smoked the transmission in it, but still doesn't count as a vape.
pardon me but HWHAT
the actual
fuck
e: i came here to buy a washing machine who let this happen
"Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
Life has gotten in the way unfortunately.
Rest assured, ideas have been taken and they will be integrated in.
Satans..... hints.....
Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better
bit.ly/2XQM1ke
My "not used in human trafficking" washing machine ad is prompting a lot of questions already answered by the ad copy
Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better
bit.ly/2XQM1ke
Satans..... hints.....
Yes
https://www.amazon.com/gp/registry/wishlist/1JI9WWSRW1YJI
Well you are short, like a gazzilion birthday presents then, get it together Mum.
Satans..... hints.....
What do you think, I’m MADE of money?!
I will not apologise for taking an interest in your life!
Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better
bit.ly/2XQM1ke