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1 Billions Lions vs 1 of Every Pokemon

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    PaperLuigi44PaperLuigi44 My amazement is at maximum capacity. Registered User regular
    Pokemon
    I need to not be reading this thread in the lunch room I can barely stifle my laughter

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    JavenJaven Registered User regular
    edited March 2021
    Chall wrote: »
    Gvzbgul wrote: »
    1 billion lions could definitely beat 7 billion people.

    A lion is just a big cat. If I had a tin of tuna and a ball of yarn I could kill 10 while they were distracted. Not that I would do that, but it would probably work.

    A Persian is just a big cat too and they do okay

    (I don't actually know if Persians are good or not. Maybe they're punks)

    Javen on
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    VeldrinVeldrin Sham bam bamina Registered User regular
    Pokemon
    Javen wrote: »
    Chall wrote: »
    Gvzbgul wrote: »
    1 billion lions could definitely beat 7 billion people.

    A lion is just a big cat. If I had a tin of tuna and a ball of yarn I could kill 10 while they were distracted. Not that I would do that, but it would probably work.

    A Persian is just a big cat too and they do okay

    (I don't actually know if Persians are good or not. Maybe they're punks)

    wait

    do you reckon the cat normals would switch sides

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    MechMantisMechMantis Registered User regular
    1 Billion Lions
    Cats are naturally treacharous, they would ABSOLUTELY join the billion lions.

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    Bluedude152Bluedude152 Registered User regular
    1 Billion Lions
    Veldrin wrote: »
    Javen wrote: »
    Chall wrote: »
    Gvzbgul wrote: »
    1 billion lions could definitely beat 7 billion people.

    A lion is just a big cat. If I had a tin of tuna and a ball of yarn I could kill 10 while they were distracted. Not that I would do that, but it would probably work.

    A Persian is just a big cat too and they do okay

    (I don't actually know if Persians are good or not. Maybe they're punks)

    wait

    do you reckon the cat normals would switch sides

    Question is if the lion pokemon would

    600px-791Solgaleo.png

    Where does his loyalty lie.......

    p0a2ody6sqnt.jpg
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    XaquinXaquin Right behind you!Registered User regular
    Pokemon
    MechMantis wrote: »
    Cats are naturally treacharous, they would ABSOLUTELY join the billion lions.

    and almost any given Pokémon would defeat them too

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    JavenJaven Registered User regular
    Any pokemon smart enough to be a god or whatever is smart enough to side with the billion lions over a bunch of bugs and tadpoles and plants and shit

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    McFodderMcFodder Registered User regular
    If lions are just cats, how much stuff could a billion of them knock off counters?

    Switch Friend Code: SW-3944-9431-0318
    PSN / Xbox / NNID: Fodder185
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    PinfeldorfPinfeldorf Yeah ZestRegistered User regular
    1 Billion Lions
    I answered Lions because a billion lions is a gigantic fucking number, but how would a literal infinite number of lions interact with a single ghost pokemon, much less like 40 of them? I assume a normal ass Earth lion wouldn't have any abilities other than normal and fighting, if they even get any fighting abilities. Like this little fucking idiot could kill every lions on every planet simply be being immortal.
    711.png

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    EmperorSethEmperorSeth Registered User regular
    Pinfeldorf wrote: »
    I answered Lions because a billion lions is a gigantic fucking number, but how would a literal infinite number of lions interact with a single ghost pokemon, much less like 40 of them? I assume a normal ass Earth lion wouldn't have any abilities other than normal and fighting, if they even get any fighting abilities. Like this little fucking idiot could kill every lions on every planet simply be being immortal.
    711.png

    Ghosts are weak to Dark element attacks.

    Bite is a Dark Element attack.

    Lions can bite.

    Problem solved! Same deal with the Shedinja mentioned earlier.

    You know what? Nanowrimo's cancelled on account of the world is stupid.
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    JavenJaven Registered User regular
    I’ve been informed that the ‘bite’ ability is super effective against ghosts, and regular lions bite shit all the time

    The lion ability kit would probably be some combination of:

    Bite
    Tackle
    Scratch/Slash?
    Growl
    Tail Whip I guess?

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    PinfeldorfPinfeldorf Yeah ZestRegistered User regular
    1 Billion Lions
    Realistically, here is the abilities a lions would actually equip:

    Rest
    Rest
    Rest
    Quick Attack

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    VeldrinVeldrin Sham bam bamina Registered User regular
    Pokemon
    are there any parasite pokemon

    a parasite would wreck a bunch of cats no problem

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    Lost SalientLost Salient blink twice if you'd like me to mercy kill youRegistered User regular
    Pokemon
    This entire question has just made me remember the scene in Pokemon Detective Pikachu where they straight-up murder Mr Mime

    Man what a great movie

    RUVCwyu.jpg
    "Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
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    Bluedude152Bluedude152 Registered User regular
    1 Billion Lions
    Desd lions can bite the ghosts

    p0a2ody6sqnt.jpg
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    Duke 2.0Duke 2.0 Time Trash Cat Registered User regular
    Pokemon
    Are lions generation 1 OG originals, and thus Bite is a Normal type move

    or are lions generation like a billion and use the latest ruleset Bite which is dark

    VRXwDW7.png
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    VeldrinVeldrin Sham bam bamina Registered User regular
    Pokemon
    We already know that people can turn into pokemon when they die full of rage or grief, so I don't see why this wouldn't also apply to lions

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    OptyOpty Registered User regular
    Pokemon
    I clicked on this thread because videos about this argument have been getting surfaced by the Youtube algorithm for me recently, for example:
    https://youtu.be/SPpGVuQJV94

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    IncenjucarIncenjucar VChatter Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    Pokemon
    Given that pokemon appear to have already replaced most animals in the ecosystem, I think they already took out billions of creatures, many of which were much deadlier than lions.

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    PoorochondriacPoorochondriac Ah, man Ah, jeezRegistered User regular
    You know what Pokemon I like? Pikachu. Cute lil guy. Got moxie, that lil Pikachu.

    He's like-- I don't know if you know him. He's like if a mouse was yellow, and had electricity?

    I mean, yeah, okay, I know we all have electricity. Neurons, etc cetera. But Pikachu? Pikachu can do, like, lightning. Zaps it right on out of his little paws.

    His tail even looks like a cartoon representation of a lightning bolt! Good stuff. Good stuff.

    That Pikachu, man. Just can't get enough of that lil guy.

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    WeedLordVegetaWeedLordVegeta Registered User regular
    edited March 2021
    1 Billion Lions
    So, the obvious take is that 'lions couldn't handle flying or deep sea legendaries'

    But if we're accurately simulating a fight, 50-80% pokemon instantly die when subjected to our laws of physics because their skeletons cannot possibly support their physiology, so the lions actually have more of an advantage than one would expect

    WeedLordVegeta on
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    Bluedude152Bluedude152 Registered User regular
    1 Billion Lions
    EE01iqjXoAM3_HW?format=jpg&name=large

    where is your god now

    p0a2ody6sqnt.jpg
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    Bluedude152Bluedude152 Registered User regular
    1 Billion Lions
    DvxNhkcWwAAwhkb?format=jpg&name=small
    WHERE IS YOUR SLUG NOW

    p0a2ody6sqnt.jpg
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    Houk the NamebringerHouk the Namebringer Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    Pokemon
    Pokemon would fucking slaughter any number of lions, all of you who think otherwise are a bunch of goddamn busters

    And all this jive about Bite being dark doesn't mean shit, because that's a pokemon move. Lions aren't pokemon, they don't have types! That's the whole point! I can bite too, but I guarantee you my bite ain't a pokemon Bite.

    The lore is stupid but it's also canon so it counts. PP isn't in the show so it's not necessarily a limitation. Many pokemon have human-level intelligence and a couple dozen humans could kill an infinite number of lions if they wanted to. Anyone who picks lions is fooling themselves and no one else

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    SolarSolar Registered User regular
    1 Billion Lions
    If you think the potemkin or whatever they are would win then you are a weeb, a crazy mad person, high on the animes

    The whimsical niceties of of these cartoon characters wouldn't stand a chance against even a million lions. Lions kill things! Pokemon don't kill anything

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    Houk the NamebringerHouk the Namebringer Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    Pokemon
    Pokemon choose not to kill things. I don't kill anything either, but given the motivation and no arbitrary restrictions I could kill a billion lions by myself.

    Could lions kill most pokemon? Yes definitely. Could they kill every pokemon? Absolutely not, impossible. Mewtwo alone would float 10 feet into the air and detonate their brains. And that's just gen 1!

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    WeedLordVegetaWeedLordVegeta Registered User regular
    edited March 2021
    1 Billion Lions
    If we do not give the lions pokemon physics and make bite a dark type move, then we are necessarily applying earth physics to pokemon, wherein charizard's bones all instantly shatter the first time it breathes

    WeedLordVegeta on
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    KelorKelor Registered User regular
    Pokemon
    Veldrin wrote: »
    are there any parasite pokemon

    a parasite would wreck a bunch of cats no problem

    137hq1hfqs0v.png

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    MatevMatev Cero Miedo Registered User regular
    Pokemon
    Pokemon would fucking slaughter any number of lions, all of you who think otherwise are a bunch of goddamn busters

    And all this jive about Bite being dark doesn't mean shit, because that's a pokemon move. Lions aren't pokemon, they don't have types! That's the whole point! I can bite too, but I guarantee you my bite ain't a pokemon Bite.

    The lore is stupid but it's also canon so it counts. PP isn't in the show so it's not necessarily a limitation. Many pokemon have human-level intelligence and a couple dozen humans could kill an infinite number of lions if they wanted to. Anyone who picks lions is fooling themselves and no one else

    Alakazam just coordinating with Arceus and Mewtwo how to most efficiently marshal the pokemon forces to end world hunger via lion meat

    "Go down, kick ass, and set yourselves up as gods, that's our Prime Directive!"
    Hail Hydra
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    Houk the NamebringerHouk the Namebringer Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    edited March 2021
    Pokemon
    No, we are giving each group its pre-existing nature. Obviously if they have to abide by real world natural laws then pokemon lose, but the question poses each group as they currently exist.

    The only way lions win is if you give them every benefit and give pokemon every disadvantage. That tells you everything you need to know.

    Like, how do they take on the original legendary birds? How do they get at Gyarados? Gen 1 alone could take infinite lions!

    Houk the Namebringer on
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    miscellaneousinsanitymiscellaneousinsanity grass grows, birds fly, sun shines, and brother, i hurt peopleRegistered User regular
    1 Billion Lions
    if i've learned anything from watching battle simulator videos on youtube, in a war of attrition pure numbers win

    and a billion is a big fucking number

    uc3ufTB.png
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    LalaboxLalabox Registered User regular
    1 Billion Lions
    if a billion lions can defeat the sun, they can definitely manage a bunch of pokemon

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    HacksawHacksaw J. Duggan Esq. Wrestler at LawRegistered User regular
    How tired are the lions

    If they haven't had their requisite 20 hours of daily naps then my money's on the Pokemon

    If they've napped my money's on the lions

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    Houk the NamebringerHouk the Namebringer Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    Pokemon
    Anyone voting lions isn't giving this the extremely serious consideration that it clearly deserves.

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    miscellaneousinsanitymiscellaneousinsanity grass grows, birds fly, sun shines, and brother, i hurt peopleRegistered User regular
    1 Billion Lions
    y'all keep trying to frame this as a battle involving "powers" and "abilities" on some kind of level playing field when in actuality the pokemon will simply be suffocated and crushed under the weight and pressure of the Mass of One Billion Lions, much as japanese honeybees swarm and cook japanese hornets to death

    uc3ufTB.png
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    MechMantisMechMantis Registered User regular
    1 Billion Lions
    Anyone voting lions isn't giving this the extremely serious consideration that it clearly deserves.

    Says the person who HASN'T VOTED YET

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    NiryaNirya Registered User regular
    1 Billion Lions
    Matev wrote: »
    Pokemon would fucking slaughter any number of lions, all of you who think otherwise are a bunch of goddamn busters

    And all this jive about Bite being dark doesn't mean shit, because that's a pokemon move. Lions aren't pokemon, they don't have types! That's the whole point! I can bite too, but I guarantee you my bite ain't a pokemon Bite.

    The lore is stupid but it's also canon so it counts. PP isn't in the show so it's not necessarily a limitation. Many pokemon have human-level intelligence and a couple dozen humans could kill an infinite number of lions if they wanted to. Anyone who picks lions is fooling themselves and no one else

    Alakazam just coordinating with Arceus and Mewtwo how to most efficiently marshal the pokemon forces to end world hunger via lion meat

    Lol if you think Mewtwo doesn’t just immediately nope out of the fight to go fight humanity over being put in this situation.

    t70pctuqq2uv.png
    3DS: 2981-5304-3227
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    Houk the NamebringerHouk the Namebringer Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    Pokemon
    MechMantis wrote: »
    Anyone voting lions isn't giving this the extremely serious consideration that it clearly deserves.

    Says the person who HASN'T VOTED YET

    lol damn I 100% thought I voted, must've hit the 'view results' button instead. stupid phone

    i have now voted and would vote the same even if the question were 'any finite number of lions versus any one pokemon of your choice'

    lions are chumps. they can't fly or do telekinesis or even open doors

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    UrielUriel Registered User regular
    I only want the lions to eat the bad pokemon I don't like

    Basically all of them after gen 1.

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    discriderdiscrider Registered User regular
    Pokemon
    One of every Pokemon can write LION SUCK with a bunch left over.

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