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[Queer] thread: A Gay ‘Ol Time
Grog
My sword is only steelin a useful shape.Registered User regular
My sword is only steelin a useful shape.Registered User regular
A thread for queers of all stripes- whether you're tired, angry, bitter or actually doing pretty good despite it all.
Got questions? Wanna kvetch? Share something good? Post it here.
If you're undecided, questioning or just generally uncertain you're welcome here.
Got questions? Wanna kvetch? Share something good? Post it here.
If you're undecided, questioning or just generally uncertain you're welcome here.
Sterica on
+4
Posts
So I guess, mission accomplished?
Not much else to say right now. Look, the world!
How's everyone.
Check out my site, the Bismuth Heart | My Twitter
Everyday I’m Struggling
Same here, to be honest.
I could hear the notes implied by this post.
But yeah, I'm considering getting some hair removal cram and slathering my body in it.
But then i remember that the nail polish, while it did make me feel good, also made me feel scared... and how i stopped wearing that.
I even stopped braiding my hair lately.
IDK, i feel kinda childish while experimenting with these things. I feel like if i were less masculine than i look, i'd have acted on it earlier. I'm almost 32 and it feels too late (I know it isn't, but it still feels too late)
Check out my site, the Bismuth Heart | My Twitter
Take that, companies changing their logos back today
thats pink and bluish purple, right?
Check out my site, the Bismuth Heart | My Twitter
It's only getting later
Yeah it's a bright blue at the roots and bright pink at the tips. It wasn't blended super well and we did a bad job on some of the roots at first so I suggested using the purple on a second pass to hit those and it turned into a really hot gradient throughout.
So yeah I'm not really sure how to think about myself. I'm definitely glad I went for it and I could possibly see doing something like that again in the future, but I'm still mainly attracted to women and I'm not sure I'm interested in pursuing men going forward.
Given all that, I'm not sure this thread is for me so I'm not gonna take up space/attention, but since it just happened I kinda wanted to just verbalize it and put it out there for my own sake.
I think there are legions of people in the same boat, and understanding that sexuality is a difficult thing to pin down is pretty relevant to the queer experience.
Thanks, I appreciate you saying that! To be honest, it's been a pretty common experience throughout my life that lots of people (especially gay men) have assumed I'm gay after meeting me for the first time for whatever reason (like, to the point they would straight-up tell me they didn't believe I wasn't lol). I always just figured it was due to me being generally friendly and outgoing and not really going in for traditional toxic masculinity group behavior, but apparently they were on to something!
So this comes up a lot in a therapy context. Like pretty much 100% of the time honestly. It also makes all the sense in the world to me. It feels childish because it is typically something we go through during childhood and into adolescence. You try out a bunch of different looks until you figure out which one really gels with who you are at the moment. From then on it can be an easy gradual transition so you don't typically take much notice of it at all.
The problem is as a society we view childish as meaning immature, and bad exclusively rather than a broader view. We stigmatize anything that isn't work, bran cereal, and talking about 401ks without a lot of push back. When you really look at the full range of human behavior though a lot of it really can be seen as childish. Celebrity news industry, sports industry, movies, TV shows, and plays all have their roots in filling child like aspects of ourselves that we want to celebrate.
I think I am going very tangential so I will try to loop it back here. The end result is that not everything from your childhood is bad. In fact, holding onto it can have tremendous positive effects for mental health. Embrace that shit! Love it! Relish in the simplicity of life occasionally! It is needed as it is something you were denied growing up.
This is an area that was never fully explored because of a fucked up society that wants to further stigmatize you for it's shitty behavior. Fuck that! It will feel silly and wonderful at times. Eventually it will feel "right" and that is a cool place to be. Anyone else can suck it, or not depending on what is the exact opposite of their preference!
When people ask I just say I’m flirty. Because that’s it, right? Mostly I mean. I’m attracted to women and I’ve never really contemplated being with a guy, but one day I just said fuck it and now I give anyone hot a smile and a dirty comment (if it’s appropriate). It just feels natural to me, far more natural than the way I was raised by my culture—only opening up to women you wanna bang. I’d rather compliment people and spend time with them regardless of whether I intent to have sex with them. That’s like, the end goal of some very particular requirements, not how life should be approached generally.
Intimacy is beautiful. Conversation is divine. I like listening, you know? So dates are good for that.
@21stCentury
I’m coming at this from a privileged position, but I do dabble in Goth culture, so when I feel inclined I whack on all black silk and satin and wander about without a care. I think some quirk in the rules make this seem like a performance rather than a, you know, me, so I get more good comments than bad.
I think you should go all in on what you want to dress like. Braid your hair, wear nail polish, wear something outlandish—tie dye jeans, leather jacket, Japanese Hakama skirts—whatever. If anyone asks say you’re a witch punk or something.
It can be scary out there, more so depending where you are in the world, but that’s why I also advise you to go swimming more and learn juijitsu, but err, nail polish first.
Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better
bit.ly/2XQM1ke
Tynic: "Let me tell you about :winky: robots :winky: "
Welcome to the bi team @Houk the Namebringer : ))
You've reminded me today that dating is really fun, almost forgot to miss it during this pandemic X )
I want to go to this romantic event for poly people... but my primary partner's off traveling so I'd be solo there for the first time in years...
That would be a really dumb, risky thing to do, right?
It’s really not ideal given everything, which is a shame. I suppose you could look into whether they’re testing people at the door, to limit, but not totally remove the chances.
From an emotional point of vies, I’d be interested to know how’s you’d feel going their alone. What was it like going there single years ago?
One thing I learned last night re: making out with guys is that I am definitely not into even the smallest amount of facial hair/stubble
that friction is no bueno
But, have been looking forward to going as a couple again. Less risk of anyone's feelings getting hurt that way. Sucks that this thing is finally happening when my partner is away...
Maybe it's a bit crazy that kind of risk occurred to me before the COVID risk X )
Naw it makes loads of sense. If not for my job I would have said that first, it’s just second nature for me now.
You could call them and see how they’d feel about it. I don’t know what limits such relationships have. The mere fact you’d be less happy doing it without them suggests you’re better off not.
I can love Anybody and everybody, but that doesn't mean I want to fuck them. But to want to fuck someone, I really need to love them.
My sexual interest and attraction is for my hubby. But I can totally appreciate the physical gorgeousness of others. And maybe a stray, "wonder what it would be like to kiss her" (and it's always her for some reason).
I'm sitting at a cafe right now, in my rainbow and gold Beanie, which is flashing my pride badges.
And I'm actually not feeling uncomfortable if anyone noticed them.
Democrats Abroad! || Vote From Abroad
If it helps, I didn't start anything until I was 35, and didn't denude any hair until 37. So you're ahead of me.
That's my understanding of it, yeah. It's under the Ace umbrella
Democrats Abroad! || Vote From Abroad
Yeah, i hear ya. I identify as panromantic asexual but sometimes i wonder if i'm not demi.
Check out my site, the Bismuth Heart | My Twitter
(Plz ignore this horrible joke)