What is the strongest animal that [chat] can take on bare-handed?

Hahnsoo1

Americans are dumb. But I'm sure [chat] will provide better answers, right? Poll options are listed in order of least to most difficult, based on the... above poll, I guess? Not all animals are represented... I didn't include household pets because I'm not a fucking monster.

Captain Inertia wrote: »

Yeah I need two clarifications:
1. Is all of [chat] teaming up
2. Is the animal typical of its species or is it “the strongest” of its species

Wait another one

1A. If all of [chat] is teaming up, is the fight lost when the first chatter goes down or only after all of us perish

Wait fuck I already voted….plz answer anyway

1. Just one [chat]ter, but you may choose a champion. (1A is moot)
2. The animal is as strong as the [chat]ter believes themselves to be as a specimen of humankind.

Tumin

Gorilla

All of chat or the strongest of us

Six

https://twitter.com/lilydont/status/1412321584002469888?s=21

Hahnsoo1

Chanus

Tumin wrote: »

All of chat or the strongest of us

You may choose a [chat]ter to be your champion, as per the Old Rites.

Neco

I can easily take on anything in that list

I’m very powerful

Kamiro

Chanus

all I gotta do is wait until he goes to sleep at 7pm and unplug his CPAP.

ez pz

Powerpuppies

Goose

Hahnsoo1 wrote: »

Tumin wrote: »

All of chat or the strongest of us

You may choose a [chat]ter to be your champion, as per the Old Rites.

Chanus against Chanus

TTODewback

Elephant

Is it considered a win if you die from the cobras venom at a later time

JebusUD

Didn't we ready have exactly this chat poll or is this just deja vu all over again?

Hahnsoo1

Chanus

Six wrote: »

https://twitter.com/lilydont/status/1412321584002469888?s=21

Both Garys inside you have free two-day shipping.

Tumin

Gorilla

I think all of chat might be able to kill a gorilla if we break down a chatter to craft weapons out of

Powerpuppies

Goose

Podcasts told me birds look big but are really fragile and there's no way an adult human could lose to one

Neco

TTODewback wrote: »

Is it considered a win if you die from the cobras venom at a later time

Of course not. Only a WEAKLING would die from that

Donkey Kong

Gorilla

Goose and eagle are the only two I could take. This is not based on fighting ability, really. Just that I could grab, hold, and fall on top of these relatively light and fragile animals. It would not be a glorious battle, I might lose an eye, and I'd rather resolve the conflict in literally any other way.

But I am confident and I don't think doing a Dunning-Krueger here

Six

Powerpuppies wrote: »

Hahnsoo1 wrote: »

Tumin wrote: »

All of chat or the strongest of us

You may choose a [chat]ter to be your champion, as per the Old Rites.

Chanus against Chanus

This reminds me of Fight Night Round 3 on the 360, which had a fun character creator. A friend and I made versions of our other friends in it to use and had great fun playing it. Eventually we got drunk enough that playing was hard, so we just let the computer play each character.

And then we bet on it.

So we were betting real money with each other while the CPU played Fight Night Round 3 against itself using created characters that looked like our friends.

It was awesome.

Hahnsoo1

Chanus

Powerpuppies wrote: »

Podcasts told me birds look big but are really fragile and there's no way an adult human could lose to one

When I was talking to Hahnsboo about this very silly poll, we were discussing "What are even the terms of this fight? Like, if one of the birds fly away, is it a draw or a win?"

Mostly, we were discussing "Who the FUCK thinks they can even harm an elephant with their bare hands??"

zepherin

Wolf

I just wanted to see Wolf above all my posts for the next 100 pages.

Donkey Kong

Gorilla

everything else I give myself least than 50% odds. some as low as 0%

Winky

Powerpuppies wrote: »

Podcasts told me birds look big but are really fragile and there's no way an adult human could lose to one

Except for flightless birds.

Australia learned that the hard way.

TTODewback

Elephant

a single well placed punch would literally kill almost every bird in existence regardless of size
mine you not every bird at once
just the particular bird of choice that is currently being punched

amateurhour

Gorilla

I'm going for the Gold Medal.

Neco

There’s not a single creature I couldn’t kill in hand to hand combat

I guess some of us are just stronger than others

Kamiro

Chanus

I think maybe I would have a slightly higher than 50% chance against a king cobra. but maybe only slightly

Powerpuppies

Goose

Hahnsoo1 wrote: »

Powerpuppies wrote: »

Podcasts told me birds look big but are really fragile and there's no way an adult human could lose to one

When I was talking to Hahnsboo about this very silly poll, we were discussing "What are even the terms of this fight? Like, if one of the birds fly away, is it a draw or a win?"

Mostly, we were discussing "Who the FUCK thinks they can even harm an elephant with their bare hands??"

Both of you are highly motivated to kill at least one of the other and will not flee for five minutes. No prep time. If one of you is more injured than the other but both of you will live without medical attention, it's a draw

Bethryn

Goose

zepherin wrote: »

I just wanted to see Wolf above all my posts for the next 100 pages.

Calling me a goose will be utterly redundant.

TTODewback

Elephant

I chose elephant because I believe chat can do anything it puts its mind to

Donkey Kong

Gorilla

I'm not sure that, bare-handed, I could actually do anything of note to a king cobra. I think you'd have to get teeth involved tbh to score any kind of damage at all, and I dont know if I am prepared to bite a live cobra.

durandal4532

King Cobra

I can win a fight with any venomous snake as long as they are not allowed to sneak up on me and as long as I can declare victory before the poison takes hold.

Six

Donkey Kong wrote: »

Goose and eagle are the only two I could take. This is not based on fighting ability, really. Just that I could grab, hold, and fall on top of these relatively light and fragile animals. It would not be a glorious battle, I might lose an eye, and I'd rather resolve the conflict in literally any other way.

But I am confident and I don't think doing a Dunning-Krueger here

DK would rather argue with an eagle: confirmed.

Hahnsoo1

Chanus

JebusUD wrote: »

Didn't we ready have exactly this chat poll or is this just deja vu all over again?

This exact poll came up in [chat] one time, when the poll first came out. But I don't think [chat] weighed in on it in poll form.

Captain Inertia

Chanus

Yeah I need two clarifications:
1. Is all of [chat] teaming up
2. Is the animal typical of its species or is it “the strongest” of its species

Wait another one

1A. If all of [chat] is teaming up, is the fight lost when the first chatter goes down or only after all of us perish

Wait fuck I already voted….plz answer anyway

Six

The only thing I can kill single-handedly is my hope for a better tomorrow.

Kamiro

Chanus

Donkey Kong wrote: »

I'm not sure that, bare-handed, I could actually do anything of note to a king cobra. I think you'd have to get teeth involved tbh to score any kind of damage at all, and I dont know if I am prepared to bite a live cobra.

nah, you just grab it by the end of the tail and swing it around your head enough so gravity does the work so it can't coil up and bite you and then WAM, right against the ground

Echo

What if the cobra is Batman?

Elendil

Eagle

i could take a medium dog but only if it's like, a nice one and i'm getting the first strike

zepherin

Wolf

I will defeat the wolf by befriending it.

Cause wolves are dope

Unknown

This content has been removed.

Casual

Eagle

i dont know if i could beat the shit out of a bald eagle but i'd sure like to try

take that AMERICA

Hahnsoo1

Chanus

Powerpuppies wrote: »

Hahnsoo1 wrote: »

Powerpuppies wrote: »

Podcasts told me birds look big but are really fragile and there's no way an adult human could lose to one

When I was talking to Hahnsboo about this very silly poll, we were discussing "What are even the terms of this fight? Like, if one of the birds fly away, is it a draw or a win?"

Mostly, we were discussing "Who the FUCK thinks they can even harm an elephant with their bare hands??"

Both of you are highly motivated to kill at least one of the other and will not flee for five minutes. No prep time. If one of you is more injured than the other but both of you will live without medical attention, it's a draw

An elephant that is highly motivated to kill you seems like an incredibly scary thing.

TTODewback

Elephant

*takes out a life insurance policy on chanus*
I choose chanus to fight my elephant.

HerrCron

Powerpuppies wrote: »

Hahnsoo1 wrote: »

Powerpuppies wrote: »

Podcasts told me birds look big but are really fragile and there's no way an adult human could lose to one

When I was talking to Hahnsboo about this very silly poll, we were discussing "What are even the terms of this fight? Like, if one of the birds fly away, is it a draw or a win?"

Mostly, we were discussing "Who the FUCK thinks they can even harm an elephant with their bare hands??"

Both of you are highly motivated to kill at least one of the other and will not flee for five minutes. No prep time. If one of you is more injured than the other but both of you will live without medical attention, it's a draw

Jokes on you, I've never been motivated, let alone highly motivated.