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This is a huge humble brag but I only recently started dating someone whom I used to subscribe to on OnlyFans
It's me, the chosen simp
okay so like I have a couple questions that are straight up prying about this, do you mind if I ask? absolutely fine if not, I'm just a nosy bitch who gets way too curious about things that are categorically not my business.
This is a huge humble brag but I only recently started dating someone whom I used to subscribe to on OnlyFans
It's me, the chosen simp
okay so like I have a couple questions that are straight up prying about this, do you mind if I ask? absolutely fine if not, I'm just a nosy bitch who gets way too curious about things that are categorically not my business.
Go ahead. To be fair we've known each other for 10 years, been good friends, and the only reason she realized I was attracted to her at all was me asking if it was kosher for me to sub to her OF
Sent a message to the girl from last saying I had fun and would be down to hang again and she agreed so I guess I'll probably be seeing her later at some point.
I think I have another date set up some time for next week, too.
After chatting with him for the last week there was a minor collection of flags that just pointed to him initially being a Media Himbo, but eventually to probably not being particularly... insightful, politically
A collection of takes that includes:
- he thought Detroit: Become Human was a deep and thoughtful game, including striking stories about motherhood, an incredible twist, and adoring how you could find the abuser character later and find out he's just a sad lonely guy!!
- he and his friends have a Weird Food Night which... is the most white and problematically named thing possible, because the weird food is just...trying stuff like Ethiopian food or traditional Chinese food
- he found Joe and Love incredibly relatable in the show You and also mounted a deep defense of Beck, the most basic character ever committed to the screen. He uh, did not specify what about Joe, the serial stalker/killer character, was relatable when I said he's a combination of Dennis from It's Always Sunny and Dexter Morgan...
- he thought the intended route through Disco Elysium, a game written by communists, was actually the centrist route
- the last straw was him being kind of a dick about the concept of pro wrestling and implying I must find the Undertaker sexy
Anyway he didn't seem awful and like, these weren't totally cancellable offenses or anything, but it mostly just added up to a series of little hints that his politics were basic as hell and not really worth trying to tune up
After two days of ghosting he just sent a message saying he simply didn't feel a spark on the date which is rather at odds with how he wanted a second one, so, he seems to mostly be trying to save face since I was clearly dipping out
It is... probably for the best to not find out what he found relatable about Joe in a relationship
After chatting with him for the last week there was a minor collection of flags that just pointed to him initially being a Media Himbo, but eventually to probably not being particularly... insightful, politically
A collection of takes that includes:
- he thought Detroit: Become Human was a deep and thoughtful game, including striking stories about motherhood, an incredible twist, and adoring how you could find the abuser character later and find out he's just a sad lonely guy!!
- he and his friends have a Weird Food Night which... is the most white and problematically named thing possible, because the weird food is just...trying stuff like Ethiopian food or traditional Chinese food
- he found Joe and Love incredibly relatable in the show You and also mounted a deep defense of Beck, the most basic character ever committed to the screen. He uh, did not specify what about Joe, the serial stalker/killer character, was relatable when I said he's a combination of Dennis from It's Always Sunny and Dexter Morgan...
- he thought the intended route through Disco Elysium, a game written by communists, was actually the centrist route
- the last straw was him being kind of a dick about the concept of pro wrestling and implying I must find the Undertaker sexy
Anyway he didn't seem awful and like, these weren't totally cancellable offenses or anything, but it mostly just added up to a series of little hints that his politics were basic as hell and not really worth trying to tune up
After two days of ghosting he just sent a message saying he simply didn't feel a spark on the date which is rather at odds with how he wanted a second one, so, he seems to mostly be trying to save face since I was clearly dipping out
It is... probably for the best to not find out what he found relatable about Joe in a relationship
Did you at least take his jacket
I was holding out for a second date for that and now I'll just have to figure out where he lives
I think the best part about being in a relationship with someone on the same wavelength as you is just dumping so many very specific memes on them and they actually get them and don't think I'm full on insane for leaving them 40 messages for when they wake up
Eh idk, thinking Detroit: Become Human is a deep and thoughtful game might actually be cancellable.
I had to have a long think about that one and settled on "I guess if I played this with my maturity at 20 years old, I might have gone Wow Cool Detective Robot" on it (though... this guy is 33...)
But the You thing was... a pretty big flag in tandem
The show is entirely about fatally unhealthy attachments in relationships
Also undertaker isn't even a very sexy wrestler imho, he's cool looking but that's a different thing
But now I'm trying to think what pro wrestler I think is sexiest and I think it might be Rey Mysterio?
But then I also haven't watched WWE or anything in a decade
I attempted to describe that like... the appeal is comic book storylines performed by very attractive people doing incredibly inhuman acrobatics, and that writing is pretty central to making you care about it since it's effectively Backflip Theatre, and his reaction was, without copy-pasting receipts, kind of a shitty couple takes on it being terrible/my tastes being poor (where the real flag here was: don't be shitty about a prospective date's interests and instead find out why they're passionate about a thing, ask questions, etc)
Ain't gonna yuck yums but Rey Mysterio isn't really a Finn Balor or Xavier Woods or Rhea Ripley or Zelina Vega, here
Also undertaker isn't even a very sexy wrestler imho, he's cool looking but that's a different thing
But now I'm trying to think what pro wrestler I think is sexiest and I think it might be Rey Mysterio?
But then I also haven't watched WWE or anything in a decade
I attempted to describe that like... the appeal is comic book storylines performed by very attractive people doing incredibly inhuman acrobatics, and that writing is pretty central to making you care about it since it's effectively Backflip Theatre, and his reaction was, without copy-pasting receipts, kind of a shitty couple takes on it being terrible/my tastes being poor (where the real flag here was: don't be shitty about a prospective date's interests and instead find out why they're passionate about a thing, ask questions, etc)
Ain't gonna yuck yums but Rey Mysterio isn't really a Finn Balor or Xavier Woods or Rhea Ripley or Zelina Vega, here
Yeah that's fair and something I am bad at myself honestly because of the aforementioned attention span stuff. Hard to be a good listener and all when I can barely rub two moments of coherent thought together lots of the time. But I'm a broken shell of a person.
And yeah, I am not super familiar with any of them. And I've always been bad at paying attention to the women wrestlers too but back when I watched at all they weren't giving them a ton of time.
Holy moly I just googled Finn Balor and Rhea Ripley. D a n g.
After chatting with him for the last week there was a minor collection of flags that just pointed to him initially being a Media Himbo, but eventually to probably not being particularly... insightful, politically
A collection of takes that includes:
- he thought Detroit: Become Human was a deep and thoughtful game, including striking stories about motherhood, an incredible twist, and adoring how you could find the abuser character later and find out he's just a sad lonely guy!!
- he and his friends have a Weird Food Night which... is the most white and problematically named thing possible, because the weird food is just...trying stuff like Ethiopian food or traditional Chinese food
- he found Joe and Love incredibly relatable in the show You and also mounted a deep defense of Beck, the most basic character ever committed to the screen. He uh, did not specify what about Joe, the serial stalker/killer character, was relatable when I said he's a combination of Dennis from It's Always Sunny and Dexter Morgan...
- he thought the intended route through Disco Elysium, a game written by communists, was actually the centrist route
- the last straw was him being kind of a dick about the concept of pro wrestling and implying I must find the Undertaker sexy
Anyway he didn't seem awful and like, these weren't totally cancellable offenses or anything, but it mostly just added up to a series of little hints that his politics were basic as hell and not really worth trying to tune up
After two days of ghosting he just sent a message saying he simply didn't feel a spark on the date which is rather at odds with how he wanted a second one, so, he seems to mostly be trying to save face since I was clearly dipping out
It is... probably for the best to not find out what he found relatable about Joe in a relationship
Yeah, no, this guy sounds like I would hate him after like a week.
Bummer, we were all taken in by the allure of the jacket.
Posts
Love...?
*sips his astronaut beverage, stares off into the distance and sighs, nostalgia rattling his bronchi*
It's an anagram of vole.
I'm officiating my sister's marriage tomorrow, it's just a little like, ceremony in some exotic plant store
oh man I am so nervous. I don't really have to do anything except be like "love rules and these two are in love and it's, well, lovely."
An exotic plant store sounds like an extremely baller place to get married. Good luck with the preachin', Preach.
I can absolutely say with certainty it was a date. Classic example. All the tell tale, hallmark signs, you'd be a fool not to recognize it.
ah yes, the signs
I dunno! I guess this is what I wanted. Just real low stakes, non commital bullshit, maybe.
but, as always, the thing I was dreading actually turned out to be pretty easy. Am I going to learn a lesson from this? no of course not.
It's me, the chosen simp
dang that is a very good meetcute
okay so like I have a couple questions that are straight up prying about this, do you mind if I ask? absolutely fine if not, I'm just a nosy bitch who gets way too curious about things that are categorically not my business.
that line is going in the trailer
Go ahead. To be fair we've known each other for 10 years, been good friends, and the only reason she realized I was attracted to her at all was me asking if it was kosher for me to sub to her OF
Me realizing ten years late in the game I'm massively bad at flirting
legendary
we salute thee
I think I have another date set up some time for next week, too.
After chatting with him for the last week there was a minor collection of flags that just pointed to him initially being a Media Himbo, but eventually to probably not being particularly... insightful, politically
A collection of takes that includes:
- he thought Detroit: Become Human was a deep and thoughtful game, including striking stories about motherhood, an incredible twist, and adoring how you could find the abuser character later and find out he's just a sad lonely guy!!
- he and his friends have a Weird Food Night which... is the most white and problematically named thing possible, because the weird food is just...trying stuff like Ethiopian food or traditional Chinese food
- he found Joe and Love incredibly relatable in the show You and also mounted a deep defense of Beck, the most basic character ever committed to the screen. He uh, did not specify what about Joe, the serial stalker/killer character, was relatable when I said he's a combination of Dennis from It's Always Sunny and Dexter Morgan...
- he thought the intended route through Disco Elysium, a game written by communists, was actually the centrist route
- the last straw was him being kind of a dick about the concept of pro wrestling and implying I must find the Undertaker sexy
Anyway he didn't seem awful and like, these weren't totally cancellable offenses or anything, but it mostly just added up to a series of little hints that his politics were basic as hell and not really worth trying to tune up
After two days of ghosting he just sent a message saying he simply didn't feel a spark on the date which is rather at odds with how he wanted a second one, so, he seems to mostly be trying to save face since I was clearly dipping out
It is... probably for the best to not find out what he found relatable about Joe in a relationship
3DS Friend Code: 0216-0898-6512
Switch Friend Code: SW-7437-1538-7786
I was holding out for a second date for that and now I'll just have to figure out where he lives
3DS Friend Code: 0216-0898-6512
Switch Friend Code: SW-7437-1538-7786
I had to have a long think about that one and settled on "I guess if I played this with my maturity at 20 years old, I might have gone Wow Cool Detective Robot" on it (though... this guy is 33...)
But the You thing was... a pretty big flag in tandem
The show is entirely about fatally unhealthy attachments in relationships
3DS Friend Code: 0216-0898-6512
Switch Friend Code: SW-7437-1538-7786
Ask me how
But now I'm trying to think what pro wrestler I think is sexiest and I think it might be Rey Mysterio?
But then I also haven't watched WWE or anything in a decade
I attempted to describe that like... the appeal is comic book storylines performed by very attractive people doing incredibly inhuman acrobatics, and that writing is pretty central to making you care about it since it's effectively Backflip Theatre, and his reaction was, without copy-pasting receipts, kind of a shitty couple takes on it being terrible/my tastes being poor (where the real flag here was: don't be shitty about a prospective date's interests and instead find out why they're passionate about a thing, ask questions, etc)
Ain't gonna yuck yums but Rey Mysterio isn't really a Finn Balor or Xavier Woods or Rhea Ripley or Zelina Vega, here
3DS Friend Code: 0216-0898-6512
Switch Friend Code: SW-7437-1538-7786
Yeah that's fair and something I am bad at myself honestly because of the aforementioned attention span stuff. Hard to be a good listener and all when I can barely rub two moments of coherent thought together lots of the time. But I'm a broken shell of a person.
And yeah, I am not super familiar with any of them. And I've always been bad at paying attention to the women wrestlers too but back when I watched at all they weren't giving them a ton of time.
Holy moly I just googled Finn Balor and Rhea Ripley. D a n g.
Yeah, no, this guy sounds like I would hate him after like a week.
Bummer, we were all taken in by the allure of the jacket.
I'm gonna put these leftover mashed potatoes and peas and KFC chicken into this Cream of Mushroom soup.
With an egg.
And then I'm gonna crush up the last of these tortilla chips and dump them in there.
And make some toast to also dip into the soup.
This is not actually a weird food night.
I'm available, folks.
There’s terrible food, I’ve seen and had some of that before.
But food is food.