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  • GizzyGizzy i am a cat PhoenixRegistered User regular
    I get to have my first not fun conversation with an employee who was not happy with their annual raise.

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  • JedocJedoc In the scuppers with the staggers and jagsRegistered User regular
    Just notarized a mail-in ballot for the special election on recreational marijuana. The guy's shirt was covered with Grateful Dead bears, so I think I can pretty confidently add a "Yea" to the poll numbers.

    GDdCWMm.jpg
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  • JuggernutJuggernut Registered User regular
    Well, it looks like I'm a shoe-in for the team lead role barring me completely bombing my interview.

    But it's fun because I'm only getting it due to the other guy getting fucked on technicalities since he quit and came back! I know, like actually know, both my boss and my boss's boss wanted him in one of the two roles and he would've beaten me out for it in the first go round. So much so, they delayed posting the second job because they know he's not eligible to bid on it now.

    So, it's kinda like, cool, once again I am getting something not because I earned it or was the best person for the job, I was just second in line with the minimum check marks when they couldn't get who they really wanted.

    MulysaSemproniusThegreatcowDarth Waiter
  • OghulkOghulk Tinychat Janitor TinychatRegistered User regular
    Well looks like the new unit I am interested in is going to be permanent instead of the stupid temp setup that was recommended by my boss.

    Hmmmm

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  • PellaeonPellaeon Registered User regular
    Juggernut wrote: »
    Well, it looks like I'm a shoe-in for the team lead role barring me completely bombing my interview.

    But it's fun because I'm only getting it due to the other guy getting fucked on technicalities since he quit and came back! I know, like actually know, both my boss and my boss's boss wanted him in one of the two roles and he would've beaten me out for it in the first go round. So much so, they delayed posting the second job because they know he's not eligible to bid on it now.

    So, it's kinda like, cool, once again I am getting something not because I earned it or was the best person for the job, I was just second in line with the minimum check marks when they couldn't get who they really wanted.

    So there's two roles, they really want this person for one of them, so they're holding posting the second for this person so they can get it later.

    In the meantime you're a shoe-in for the one role, which, if this person had been eligible, would have been one of the two roles.

    Unless there's some mysterious third person I fail to see how you're not one of the top two candidates so fuck it, get that job, get that paper.

    Also this other person quit and came back while you put up with the suck. Does it blow for them that they have to wait for the job? Sure, but they made their choice, that's not your fault or problem. Fuck that.

    When I started working after 08 there were a bunch of people who had left for better jobs before the great recession that came back and had to take positions behind me, greeny mc green sauce. Did that suck for them? Absolutely, but ain't shit I could have done about it so :shrug:

    If this person is that good they'll get theirs eventually, in the meantime don't feel bad about yours after all the shit you've gone through.

    lonelyahavaV1mElvenshaeMoridin889Kane Red RobeEtheacrzyangoCommander ZoomhonovereNaphtaliMechMantisschussPacificstarDecatusAiouaBlackDragon480CalicaHefflingN1tSt4lkerstopgapMulysaSemproniusCormacthatassemblyguyJokermanThro
  • H0b0manH0b0man Registered User regular
    Juggernut wrote: »
    Well, it looks like I'm a shoe-in for the team lead role barring me completely bombing my interview.

    But it's fun because I'm only getting it due to the other guy getting fucked on technicalities since he quit and came back! I know, like actually know, both my boss and my boss's boss wanted him in one of the two roles and he would've beaten me out for it in the first go round. So much so, they delayed posting the second job because they know he's not eligible to bid on it now.

    So, it's kinda like, cool, once again I am getting something not because I earned it or was the best person for the job, I was just second in line with the minimum check marks when they couldn't get who they really wanted.

    If they didn't want you for the role they wouldn't offer it to you. Full stop.

    Like Pellaeon said there are two positions available. It sounds like you'd be getting one of the two regardless of what the other person had done.

    FFXIV: Agran Trask
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  • lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava ~~She/Her~~ Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    And just because they prefer this other guy, they're also likely management idiots that don't know what our who they have in you.

    Just because they want one thing doesn't mean that is the good or right thing for the company or the department.

    Don't let their short sighted wishes and wants get in the depths of your brain and your skill and your talent.

    You are good at your job. Amazing even. You deserve the promotion. You will excel at it.

    Whether they want it or not.

    ElvenshaeCommander ZoomBlackDragon480AldoMulysaSemproniusCormacDarth Waiter
  • ShadowfireShadowfire Vermont, in the middle of nowhereRegistered User regular
    Jedoc, you can just push a couple shelves back against the wall and put up a pink rod with rainbow bead curtain. Big "adults only" sign with multicolored lights around it. Really lean into that VHS section design.

    WiiU: Windrunner ; Guild Wars 2: Shadowfire.3940 ; PSN: Bradcopter
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  • expendableexpendable Silly Goose Registered User regular
    No matter how ruthlessly or thoroughly I purge Old/EoL tech and its assosciated detritus at this school, I keep finding shit like this

    v3u89i5z9766.png

    Djiem wrote: »
    Lokiamis wrote: »
    So the servers suddenly decide to cramp up during the last six percent.
    Man, the Director will really go out of his way to be a dick to L4D players.
    Steam
    DouglasDangerDisruptedCapitalistCommander ZoomToxSkeithMechMantisPacificstarBlackDragon480Hefflingani_game_bumsarukunBullheadCormacMegaMan001thatassemblyguyFishman
  • ElvenshaeElvenshae Registered User regular
    Shadowfire wrote: »
    pink rod

    teehee

    ShadowfireDisruptedCapitalistminor incidentMagic Pink
  • David_TDavid_T A fashion yes-man is no good to me. Copenhagen, DenmarkRegistered User regular
    Elvenshae wrote: »
    I wish I weren't an idiot, fuck, even trying to understand how to do what these helpful videos are telling me to do is frustrating me

    Okay, so, VLOOKUPs simplified are ...

    =VLOOKUP(what I'm looking for, the place I'm looking (the thing I'm looking for needs to be in the first column), what column has the info I care about, FALSE)

    Your last part should always be FALSE unless you know what you're doing (it forces an exact match, which is the use case >98% of the time).

    So, if you have a list of 20 names in column E on a spreadsheet, and you want to see if "Steve" is in the list, then ...

    =VLOOKUP("Steve",$E$1:$E$20,1,FALSE)

    ... will show up as "Steve" if Steve is in the list and "#N/A" if it's not.

    Once you've got that down, you can start expanding the use case. Instead of looking specifically for "Steve", maybe you want the value from the cell next to the formula (if the formula is written in cell B1, it would look like):

    =VLOOKUP(A1, $E$1:$E$20,1,False)

    Instead of just returning Steve maybe you want his address, which is the third column of data (First Name, Last Name, Street Address):

    =VLOOKUP("Steve", $E$1:$G$20,3,False)

    ... or do both ...

    =VLOOKUP(A1, $E$1:$G$20,3,False)

    Without wanting to evangelize too much, I would really recommend using XLOOKUP instead, both because it's intended to replace VLOOKUP and I'm assuming VLOOKUP will be sunsetted at some point, and for simple ease of use and less chance of causing the universe to reboot, which has always been a problem with VLOOKUP.

    =XLOOKUP(what I'm looking for, the place I'm looking, the place that has the data I want returned)

    So if you have a list of 20 names in column E on a spreadsheet and you want to see if "Steve" is in the list then...

    =XLOOKUP("Steve", $E$1:$E$20, $E$1:$E$20)

    You just drag select E1 to E20 twice and that's it. You'll get Steve.

    If you have a row of 20 names starting in column E, going to column N and you want to see if "Steve" is in the row...

    =XLOOKUP("Steve", $E$1:$N$1, $E$1:$N$1)

    There's no separate HLOOKUP required, as long as the return array matches the form of the lookup array, XLOOKUP will get you what you want.

    If you have a list of names and addresses in column E and F and you want Steve's address, it's...

    =XLOOKUP("Steve", $E$1:$E$20, $F$1:$F$20)

    You don't have to worry about the lookup array encompassing the return array and how much you offset, if you want to look something up in E and return what's in F, the two arrays just have to be the same length (so 1 to 20 in both).

    If you have a list of names, adresses, emails and job titles in E to H and you want the adress, email and job title returned, it's...

    =XLOOKUP("Steve", $E$1:$E$20, $F$1:$H$20)

    And that gives you an array spill of all three columns. As long as the two arrays are the same length, you can get as many columns back as you want.

    Now, you can add in any of the optional extra commands as needed. Let's say you have a column E with first and last names in the same cell and you want a wildcard search for anyone with the first name Steve and if there's no one, you want it to return the message "We're Steveless, man, Steveless!".

    =XLOOKUP("Steve*", $E$1:$E$20, $E$1:$E$20, "We're Steveless, man, Steveless!", 2)

    "2" just means that wildcards, such as *, are used.

    I've occasionally had data sets where the lookup value I was looking for was either in column A or in column B, and I've used the "if not found, then" part of XLOOKUP in A to do a nested XLOOKUP in B. You can also do a nested horizontal XLOOKUP in the return array to get the intersecting value of two lookups, replacing the INDEX/MATCH combo.

    You can do a lot of nifty stuff in Excel these days.

    cu4c1c5yy0xr.png
    tynicMrMonroeDouglasDangerTofystedethDisruptedCapitalistPacificstarAldoHefflingLokarnThro
  • webguy20webguy20 I spend too much time on the Internet Registered User regular
    I feel like my excel doesn’t have xlookup.

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  • David_TDavid_T A fashion yes-man is no good to me. Copenhagen, DenmarkRegistered User regular
    I mean, yes, OK, in that instance, it's fine to use VLOOKUP.

    Try not to blow up the universe, though.

    cu4c1c5yy0xr.png
  • ShadowfireShadowfire Vermont, in the middle of nowhereRegistered User regular
    VLOOKUP/0

    WiiU: Windrunner ; Guild Wars 2: Shadowfire.3940 ; PSN: Bradcopter
  • crzyangocrzyango Registered User regular
    Juggernut wrote: »
    Well, it looks like I'm a shoe-in for the team lead role barring me completely bombing my interview.

    But it's fun because I'm only getting it due to the other guy getting fucked on technicalities since he quit and came back! I know, like actually know, both my boss and my boss's boss wanted him in one of the two roles and he would've beaten me out for it in the first go round. So much so, they delayed posting the second job because they know he's not eligible to bid on it now.

    So, it's kinda like, cool, once again I am getting something not because I earned it or was the best person for the job, I was just second in line with the minimum check marks when they couldn't get who they really wanted.

    The only reason I have my job is because the guy that hired me fell off the wagon. It sucked. I was running cover for him for close to 6 months, he hired me and I thought I owed him.

    I didn't "deserve" my job either, but who fuckin cares? They wouldn't hire you if they didn't think you could do it.

  • OghulkOghulk Tinychat Janitor TinychatRegistered User regular
    edited February 28
    Talking with a coworker who I trust, they brought up maybe bringing up my issues with management since they certainly want to keep current staff.

    Somehow I don't think a 29 year old bringing up management issues with a couple of boomers would go well. And by management issues of course I mean the "you're condescending and don't trust your staff and your snide comments aren't great."

    Oghulk on
  • TomantaTomanta Registered User regular
    My wife's hopes of getting remote status after we move were pretty diminished today, a coworker who is homebound for just a couple of weeks after foot surgery can't even get it.

    Which increases my worrying about myself as well, even if my dept and position is different.

  • TofystedethTofystedeth Registered User regular
    expendable wrote: »
    No matter how ruthlessly or thoroughly I purge Old/EoL tech and its assosciated detritus at this school, I keep finding shit like this

    v3u89i5z9766.png

    Windowns?

    steam_sig.png
    DisruptedCapitalistTonkkaShadowfireElvenshae3cl1ps3L Ron HowardCommander ZoomexpendableN1tSt4lkersarukun
  • NaphtaliNaphtali Hazy + Flow SeaRegistered User regular
    expendable wrote: »
    No matter how ruthlessly or thoroughly I purge Old/EoL tech and its assosciated detritus at this school, I keep finding shit like this

    v3u89i5z9766.png

    Windowns?

    there was a gas leak

    Steam | Nintendo ID: Naphtali | Wish List
    BlackDragon480TonkkaHeffling
  • ButlerButler 89 episodes or bust Registered User regular
    edited March 1
    Juggernut wrote: »
    Well, it looks like I'm a shoe-in for the team lead role barring me completely bombing my interview.

    But it's fun because I'm only getting it due to the other guy getting fucked on technicalities since he quit and came back! I know, like actually know, both my boss and my boss's boss wanted him in one of the two roles and he would've beaten me out for it in the first go round. So much so, they delayed posting the second job because they know he's not eligible to bid on it now.

    So, it's kinda like, cool, once again I am getting something not because I earned it or was the best person for the job, I was just second in line with the minimum check marks when they couldn't get who they really wanted.

    This is also true of every success ever, we just usually don't know who the "better" option was. For every olympic gold medallist in history, there's at least one other person out there who would have thrashed them if they'd only had the right opportunities.

    Butler on
    DisruptedCapitalistCommander ZoomcrzyangoadytumKane Red RobeL Ron Howard
  • PacificstarPacificstar Registered User regular
    If I could get my boss to buy me the tiniest bit of excel training, my life would be so much easier

    Dude first I will grace you with one of my favorite Excel memes:
    wi9zoe1t5e32.png

    Second, as an older Excel nerd, I will spend an hour giving you a basics of Excel class on a googlemeet or something if you like. I love working in Excel and it makes me happy when people learn to use it.

    Just let me know, I'm on PST time

    FlarneRoyceSraphimDouglasDangerHefflingschussElvenshaeEtheaadytumNobodyMagic PinkOghulkKane Red RobeMagellBullheadL Ron HowardCarpyCormacTofystedethJedocthatassemblyguyCambiataThegreatcowFishmanThro
  • PellaeonPellaeon Registered User regular
    Oghulk wrote: »
    Talking with a coworker who I trust, they brought up maybe bringing up my issues with management since they certainly want to keep current staff.

    Somehow I don't think a 29 year old bringing up management issues with a couple of boomers would go well. And by management issues of course I mean the "you're condescending and don't trust your staff and your snide comments aren't great."

    It's tough, like yeah, bringing up the issues with management would theoretically be the right thing to do, but it sounds like you're burnt out and over all of it, with one foot out the door, if not just one toe left in the door at best.

    Trying to change your boss's behavior at this point via management would be a long haul, if you're not in for that then yeah I wouldn't bother either.

    MechMantis
  • AldoAldo Hippo Hooray Registered User regular
    I only grogged VLOOKUP after receiving a spreadsheet from a colleague that had one, and me having a similar spreadsheet that needed one. Still took me a while to figure out how finicky it actually was, but I got there in the end. Just need to dick around until you get it right.

  • FlarneFlarne Registered User regular
    More Excel stuff:

    Use tables! If you have data in a table, use ctrl+t to turn it into an actual table. It creates a table with dynamic references so you can use formulas to reference columns in the table and it'll always include all the rows in the column even if you add/remove data. It's a lot easier to read, an XLOOKUP between two tables that looks for a value in the Article-column from the current table in the Article-column in Table1 and returns the price from the Price-column in Table1 looks like: =XLOOKUP([@Article];Table1[Article];Table1[Price];"Not found")
    Plus you get colors and filters and autofilling formulas.

    Sick of going through the "ribbon" to find the functions you use all the time? That little menu with the Save icon above it has an options menu, click the little arrow on the right and choose "Show below the ribbon" to move it below for more convenient access. Then right click any function you want and "Add to quick access toolbar" to add a shortcut that's always available whichever tab you're on.
    2md22umea93j.png

    Use & to concatenate data. =A1&A2 will concatenate the cells, no need to use a formula. Use F4 to cycle through locking references, if you can't use dynamic ones.

    If you're unsure of a formula use the Formula tab to insert it, this gives you the excel formula wizard that explains every field. It's not always super easy to understand but it's usually better explained than trying to type it in by hand.

    BlackDragon480PacificstarDouglasDangerHefflingDisruptedCapitalist
  • MadicanMadican No face Registered User regular
    I used to teach myself Excel at work by creating random character sheet generators and seeing how intricate I could make the formulae before they started breaking, figuring out why it was breaking and how to fix it, seeing other stuff breaking, repeat ad infinitum.

    I didn't have much else to do at the time but I did learn vlookup and hlookup in the process

    V1mDisruptedCapitalist
  • BrainleechBrainleech 機知に富んだコメントはここにあります Registered User regular
    Elvenshae wrote: »
    wh...

    why does Disney have a morgue on the org chart??

    Sometimes, people die, even in the hap-hap-happiest place on Earth.
    These are their stories.
    Ba-ba
    [/spolier][/spolier]

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LWr5SLg8hSE

    PacificstarShadowfireBlackDragon480jmcdonaldOrca
  • RoyceSraphimRoyceSraphim Registered User regular
    Brainleech wrote: »
    Elvenshae wrote: »
    wh...

    why does Disney have a morgue on the org chart??

    Sometimes, people die, even in the hap-hap-happiest place on Earth.
    These are their stories.
    Ba-ba
    [/spolier][/spolier]

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LWr5SLg8hSE

    The art on the wall.

    I forgot about that...

  • HefflingHeffling No Pic EverRegistered User regular
    webguy20 wrote: »
    Thanks @Elvenshae

    I'll give it another try shortly

    If you keep getting errors, do a trim on the source columns. Maybe excel is better these days but in the part of you had hidden spaces at the end in a cell in one of the columns but not the other it would give a fail because they didn’t match correctly.

    I was working with dirty data though, data directly out of the system shouldn’t have those problems hopefully.

    If all of your entries have the same amount of spaces at the end, you can use:

    =LEFT(A2,LEN(A2)-1)

    where A2 has your data, and 1 is the number of blank spaces at the end. The LEFT function takes a cell and only uses the amount of digits your specify. In this case, we're using the LEN function to give us the length of a cell, then subtracting one. In this way, we trim off the last digit.

    You can also use the RIGHT function and an IF statement to have your tool check to see if trimming is needed:

    =IF(RIGHT(A2,1)=" ",LEFT(A2,LEN(A2)-1),A2)

    The IF function allows you to do a check, then an action if the check passes, and another action if the check fails. In this case, our check is "Does the last digit of this cell equal a blank space?" If yes, we use our trim function. If no, no trimming is needed, so we just list the original value. =IF(check,if true, if false)

    A trick now is if you copy your column with the trimming, you can paste as values over your original entries. Then you can delete the functions entirely.

    One final thing to add is an IFERROR function so that if something causes the formula to return a #N/A, you can have it return something else. We're going to use double quotes with no space between them to return an empty cell if an error occurs. ""

    =IFERROR(IF(RIGHT(A2,1)=" ",LEFT(A2,LEN(A2)-1),A2),"")

    DouglasDangerAldo
  • DouglasDangerDouglasDanger PennsylvaniaRegistered User regular
    Thank you all for the advice! I will work on it today, hopefully, and let you know how I did

    Pacificstar
  • minor incidentminor incident expert in a dying field njRegistered User regular
    Thank you all for the advice! I will work on it today, hopefully, and let you know how I did

    Doug’s gonna report back in 8 hours and tell us that he’s seen the time knife and can now manipulate reality with pivot tables.

    And we’ll say, “yeah, that’s excel, baby.”

    Everything looks beautiful when you're young and pretty
    DouglasDangerElvenshaeKane Red RobeexpendableBlackDragon480RoyceSraphimjmcdonald3cl1ps3CarpyHefflingwebguy20PacificstarCommander ZoomTofystedethkimeThegreatcowFishman
  • MechMantisMechMantis Registered User regular
    Motherfucker who turned this thread into a hive of sums and pivotry again

    dkj3oHf.jpg
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  • ElvenshaeElvenshae Registered User regular
    Excel is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural.

    minor incidentZonugalKane Red RobeTynnanDouglasDangerDisruptedCapitalistLuvTheMonkeyexpendableBullheadRoyceSraphimL Ron HowardFlarnehonovere3cl1ps3OrcaHefflingwebguy20Commander ZoomTofystedethkimethatassemblyguyThegreatcowFishmanPenumbraMechMantis
  • TomantaTomanta Registered User regular
    In the last four workdays we have:
    - almost been sideswiped by a bus
    - almost rear ended someone deciding a last second U-turn across four lanes of traffic was a great idea
    - couldn't leave our house because our weirdo neighbors were blocking our driveway.

    I want to work remote again.

  • Magic PinkMagic Pink Tur-Boner-Fed Registered User regular
    Tomanta wrote: »
    In the last four workdays we have:
    - almost been sideswiped by a bus
    - almost rear ended someone deciding a last second U-turn across four lanes of traffic was a great idea
    - couldn't leave our house because our weirdo neighbors were blocking our driveway.

    I want to work remote again.

    sounds like you need a bazooka

    SorceBlackDragon480minor incidentElvenshaeThegreatcow
  • AustinP0027AustinP0027 Registered User regular
    I feel like with those specific examples, spikes on the front of your vehicle is more appropriate. Big giant ones.

    ElvenshaeBlackDragon480
  • sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    Brainleech wrote: »
    Elvenshae wrote: »
    wh...

    why does Disney have a morgue on the org chart??

    Sometimes, people die, even in the hap-hap-happiest place on Earth.
    These are their stories.
    Ba-ba
    [/spolier][/spolier]

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LWr5SLg8hSE

    The art on the wall.

    I forgot about that...

    I gotta be honest, I am definitely more concerned about "Army/Navy Coordinator"

  • BlackDragon480BlackDragon480 Bluster Kerfuffle Master of Windy ImportRegistered User regular
    I feel like with those specific examples, spikes on the front of your vehicle is more appropriate. Big giant ones.

    I can provide a couple of Marshall 4×12 cabs if one is looking to go full Doof Wagon.

    No matter where you go...there you are.
    ~ Buckaroo Banzai
    webguy20Commander ZoomTonkkaSorce
  • Magic PinkMagic Pink Tur-Boner-Fed Registered User regular
    oh my lawks this woman for actual did a 2$ tip on a five person corporate meal

    i could never show my face on my christian minecraft server again if i did such a crime

    minor incidentElvenshaeKane Red Robe3cl1ps3ToxRoyceSraphimadytumTonkkaTofystedethJedocShadowfireMechMantisSorce
  • minor incidentminor incident expert in a dying field njRegistered User regular
    Magic Pink wrote: »
    oh my lawks this woman for actual did a 2$ tip on a five person corporate meal

    i could never show my face on my christian minecraft server again if i did such a crime

    sounds like you need a bazooka

    (just testing my theory that this response works in reply to literally anything)

    Everything looks beautiful when you're young and pretty
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  • Houk the NamebringerHouk the Namebringer Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    Man a $2 tip feels like it would be roughly 1,000x more insulting than no tip at all.

    Like at least with no tip you can just assume the person is a thoughtless asshole in general, but a $2 tip is personal.

    minor incidentElvenshaeMagic PinkMagellKane Red RobeTicaldfjamBullhead3cl1ps3NarbusstopgapDisruptedCapitalistRoyceSraphimwebguy20V1mtynicCommander ZoomBrovid HasselsmofTonkkaTofystedethlonelyahavaJedocShadowfirekimeMechMantisthatassemblyguySorceThegreatcow
This discussion has been closed.