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[PHALLA]SP13 - How I learned to stop worrying and love the Dwarf Bomb (Traitor Win!)

FunkyWaltDoggFunkyWaltDogg Registered User regular
edited July 2007 in Critical Failures
Four months later...

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

COMSAT DISPATCH 00020874324477
PRIORITY ALPHA

ATTN CAPTAIN DICKUS OF SPACE PHALLA 13

ENCRYPTED SUBETHER TRANSMISSIONS ON KNOWN SYNDICATE FREQUENCIES HAVE BEEN DETECTED FROM STATION SP13. INTELLIGENCE DIVISION HAS NOT BEEN ABLE TO DECODE ANY MESSAGES, HOWEVER VARIATIONS IN SIGNALS INDICATE EIGHT (8) DISTINCT VOICEPRINTS. TOP SECRET OBJECTIVE BELIEVED TO BE IN JEOPARDY. ADVISE INCREASED SECURITY ON OBJECTIVE AND INTENSIVE INVESTIGATIONS TO IDENTIFY SYNDICATE OPERATIVES.

END TRANSMISSION
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%


Captain Biggus Dickus sighed as he read the dispatch from HQ. He had known that it was only a matter of time before the Syndicate learned of the significance of Space Phalla 13, but that didn't make his duty any easier. He would have to inform the crew, of course. Their lives were in enough peril just from everyday station operations, and it was nothing short of a miracle that no crew members had been lost since he'd taken command. It simply wouldn't be fair to leave them in ignorance of the Syndicate infiltration. At least HQ had been able to determine just how many traitors he was dealing with.

"Good morning Space Phalla 13, this is Captain Dickus speaking. I have an important announcement from HQ, but first I need all posts to report in."

"Head of Personnel is on the bridge. The ID badge scanner is still offline, so we won't be able to make routine job reassignments."

"Head of Research is en route to the bridge."

"This is Engineering. All hands have reported, and engine status is nominal."

"Toxins here. Everything is A-OK."

"Atmospheric reporting. Levels are within tolerances in every area of the station."

"Security here, all officers present."

Before the Prison Warden could call in, Captain Dickus remembered that Security owed him a more detailed report. "How are repairs going on the Forensics computer, Security?"

"Well, Captain, we're unfortunately not able to solve any crimes right now, but we are set up to brew one mean cup of coffee."

Biggus swore under his breath. The Forensics computer never seemed to be operational. At the next crew assignment, he was definitely going to move that caffeine fiend to another department. "Very well. Keep me posted."

The reports continued. "Warden Slung Solo here. The Prison Station is in good shape. We could sure use some prisoners to look after, though."

Medical was supposed to be next, but there was only silence. "Medical, please report in." Nothing. "Captain Dickus to Medbay, is anyone there?" Still nothing. "Security, please send an officer to the Medbay and find out whether they're dead or just hopped up on rejuvenators."

"Acknowledged, Captain."

The captain paused for a moment as he pondered how best to break the bad news to the crew. Nothing clever came to mind, so he just dove right in. "Now, about that announcement. I am sorry to inform you that HQ has confirmed the presence of Syndicate operatives on Space Phalla 13. According to telemetry, there are eight of them. Unfortunately, we don't know who they are, and with the Forensics computer out of commission, we'll have a hard time finding out. I need each and every one of you to be alert at all times to any suspicious activity. Mister Solo, I'd like you to bring your team over from Space Phalla 14 to the main station. We'll need your help over here tracking down those Syndicate bastards, and if we do manage to find them I don't think we're going to have the luxury of locking them up on the prison station."

That was just about it, Biggus thought. "Men, you have your jobs and you know how to do them. Captain out." Now to see what the hell was going on in the Medbay...

Burnage wrote:
FWD is very good at this game.
FunkyWaltDogg on
«13456749

Posts

  • FunkyWaltDoggFunkyWaltDogg Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Welcome to Space Phalla 13!

    The Rules:

    Voting:
    Each night, you may vote for one player who you believe to be a traitorous Syndicate operative like so:
    I vote for Big McLargeHuge.

    If you wish to retract a vote, don't edit the vote out of your original post. Instead, post a new post with your retraction like so:
    I retract my vote for Big McLargeHuge.

    Voting closes each night at 11:00 PM EDT. Votes placed at 11:00 WILL count, but votes marked 11:01 WILL NOT count.

    In the event of a tie, all players tied for first place will be executed. If the player or players with the most votes are killed by other means, there will be no execution that night.

    You may miss a vote without penalty; however, missing two IN A ROW puts you at odds with the Inactivity Policy (see below).

    Roles:
    Each player should have received a PM indicating their role. If you did not, please notify me immediately. There are some roles which do not have any associated special abilities. The traitors should have received a second PM indicating their status as such. The traitors may have roles with special abilities. You will not be told which roles may be held by traitors, with one exception: there is a role which functions as a Seer (player who can identify Traitors), and that role IS NOT held by a traitor. There are no Guardians (players who are able to protect another player from attack), period. Note that the definition of a Seer given here is just to give first-time players a general idea of the purpose of a seer; the name of the role which serves as a Seer and the full details of that role are secret.

    Rules update: Sharing role PMs is now allowed.

    All orders must be submitted by 11:00 EDT, just like the votes.

    Bad Guys and Win Conditions:
    There is only one group of bad guys, the Syndicate Operatives AKA Traitors. There are eight traitors. There are no neutral players.

    The Crew wins if they eliminate all of the Traitors.

    The Traitors win if they eliminate enough of the Crew so that at least 50% of the surviving players are Traitors.

    Inactivity Policy:
    Any player who has fewer than two posts per day, or who misses two votes in a row, will be given one warning. A second violation of the rule will result in ejection from the game, and a ban from participating in the next three games. If something comes up and you have a good reason for not being able to participate, PM me and we will talk.

    Other:
    Dead players may freely speak to each other, but they may not speak to living players by any means, including PMs, IMs, or offsite boards. Likewise, living players may not communicate with dead players. There will be no dead thread.

    No player is permitted to compel another player to commit suicide via inactivity.

    Rules Q&A:
    Q: Do our "roles" have anything to do with our special abilities (or lack thereof)? i.e. If there are two space monkeys, 3rd class, will they have the same special abilites (or lack thereof)?

    A: Yes. All players with the same role or job title have the same abilities.


    Q: Not sure if you are allowed to post private conversations here though.

    A: The rules in most games, including this one, only prohibit posting of PMs to or from the GM. Post PMs to or from other players all you like.


    Q: Will we be told if we've killed a traitor?

    A: Yes, you will be told.


    Q: Can any kills be stopped by killing the killer?

    A: No. All traitor, vigilante, and other kills happen simultaneously, and then the vote winner is executed if he is still alive.

    Player List:
    1. robothero
    2. precisionk
    3. Research Assistant Plutonium - killed by the crew, Night 1
    4. Research Technician DevoutlyApathetic - killed by a Security Officer, Night 4
    5. Research Assistant Gnasty - killed by a Security Officer, Night 1
    6. cheez
    7. grundlterror
    8. Forensics Officer jdarksun - killed by Traitors, Night 1
    9. Station Technician B:L - killed by the crew, Night 3
    10. Prison Security Officer Saburbia - killed by the Atmospheric Technician, Night 3
    11. Niceguy Myeye
    12. Station Technician DËTHKÖK - killed by the Traitors, Night 2
    13. Vic
    14. Ardor
    15. Prison Doctor Lignisse - killed by sub-ether brain link, Night 3
    16. Drez
    17. Forensics Officer Bremen - killed by the Atmospheric Technician, Night 3
    18. Kin33
    19. Research Assistant Defunker - killed by the crew, Night 2
    20. Buzz Buzz
    21. Research Assistant Infidel - killed by the Prison Station Staff, Night 3
    22. Toxins Researcher spaik - killed by Traitors, Night 1
    23. frandelgearslip
    24. Threelemmings
    25. life3
    26. TehSpectre
    27. DarkPrimus -> Senior Fish
    28. Lord Malory
    29. Medical Doctor Papillon - killed by the crew, Night 4
    30. Medical Researcher cj iwakura - killed by Traitors, Night 3
    31. Station Technician psycholarry1 - killed by an angry GM, Night 4
    32. bliss101
    33. Hylianbunny
    34. Head of Personnel Zerinan - killed by Traitors, Night 3
    35. visiblehowl
    36. Security Officer Shamus - killed by the Traitors, Night 4
    37. Station Technician tofu - killed by the Prison Station Staff, Night 3
    38. Prison Warden tuxkamen - killed by sub-ether brain link, Night 3
    39. Research Technician Skulk - killed by a Security Officer, Night 2
    40. doug_grammar -> Squashua

    Reserve List:

    Narrations:
    Night 1
    Night 2
    Night 3
    Night 4
    Night 5

    The first vote closes Sunday night at 11:00 PM EDT.

    FunkyWaltDogg on
    Burnage wrote:
    FWD is very good at this game.
  • frandelgearslipfrandelgearslip 457670Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Yes first post. Um its great to be in a game where we have a lot of info to begin with (like how many bad guys there are).

    Oh yeah I think drez is suspicious so I !vote Drez

    frandelgearslip on
  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Captain Biggus Dickus, huh? :winky:

    Drez on
  • FunkyWaltDoggFunkyWaltDogg Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Hmm, looks like I forgot to note that the first vote closes Sunday night.

    FunkyWaltDogg on
    Burnage wrote:
    FWD is very good at this game.
  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Frandel's suspicion of me is suspicious. !vote frandelgearslip.

    What the hell does your name mean anyway?

    Drez on
  • cj iwakuracj iwakura The Rhythm Regent Chantry of NightmaresRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Yes. I always have coffee when I'm watching radar. You know that.

    Everyone knows that.

    cj iwakura on
    9LlOwgn.png
    Well, good morning. Welcome to the new scenario. What should we do today?
  • GnastyGnasty Registered User
    edited July 2007
    Hopefully this Phalla moves slower than the SE one does.

    Gnasty on
    i just wanna 'be myself'
  • Look Out it's Sabs!Look Out it's Sabs! Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Whoop whoop whoop!

    Look Out it's Sabs! on
    NNID: Sabuiy
    3DS: 2852-6809-9411
  • precisionkprecisionk Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    This station needs more space babes. WHO ARE THE SPACE BABES? THIS SPACEMAN NEEDS LUVIN.

    precisionk on
  • Look Out it's Sabs!Look Out it's Sabs! Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    precisionk wrote: »
    This station needs more space babes. WHO ARE THE SPACE BABES? THIS SPACEMAN NEEDS LUVIN.

    Who needs babes. :winky:

    Look Out it's Sabs! on
    NNID: Sabuiy
    3DS: 2852-6809-9411
  • ShamusShamus Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    I feel Gnasty is a monkey loving transexual and needs to be removed!

    Shamus on
  • DogDog Registered User, Administrator, Vanilla Staff admin
    edited July 2007
    jdarksun, you sure know an awful lot about monkeys...

    Unknown User on
  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    You guys sure know how to welcome me back to ODaM.

    Drez on
  • Look Out it's Sabs!Look Out it's Sabs! Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Drez wrote: »
    You guys sure know how to welcome me back to ODaM.

    :winky:

    Look Out it's Sabs! on
    NNID: Sabuiy
    3DS: 2852-6809-9411
  • GnastyGnasty Registered User
    edited July 2007
    !Shamus keeps coming on to me even though I tell him that I'm not interested. How many times do I have to tell you that I only love monkeys?

    Gnasty on
    i just wanna 'be myself'
  • BremenBremen Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Everyone complains about the coffee. But, I have to ask, how are we supposed to catch the traitors if we can't keep our eyes open? Answer me that!

    Converting the forensics computer into a coffeemaker was obviously a stroke of genius

    Bremen on
  • PapillonPapillon Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Caffeine IV's are more efficient.

    Papillon on
  • BremenBremen Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Papillon wrote: »
    Caffeine IV's are more efficient.

    Which is no doubt why the terrorists struck at medlab first! But we have thwarted them with our secret backup coffee machine.

    Also, I !vote for Gnasty because his deviant monkey fetish is making me question my own sexuality.

    Bremen on
  • Kin33Kin33 Registered User
    edited July 2007
    I think we should vote out spaik.

    Cause even when he is good hes bad.

    Kin33 on
  • visiblehowlvisiblehowl He/Him Neutron Nerd Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    I !vote Squygeri.

    Shut up, I know. Let a man dream.

    visiblehowl on
    vxsHp3F.gif
    I die evry tiem in Sekiro on Twitch
  • PsychoLarry1PsychoLarry1 Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    I propose we begin work on a tunnel from the medbay to engineering! Who wants to start drilling the holes in the walls? Embrace the vacuum!

    PsychoLarry1 on
  • ShamusShamus Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    I !vote Squygeri.

    Shut up, I know. Let a man dream.

    Suddenly..it all makes sense.

    Shamus on
  • DevoutlyApatheticDevoutlyApathetic Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    I propose we begin work on a tunnel from the medbay to engineering! Who wants to start drilling the holes in the walls? Embrace the vacuum!

    I think the embracing will be the other way round. Though it would be convenient......

    DevoutlyApathetic on
  • frandelgearslipfrandelgearslip 457670Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Drez wrote: »
    Frandel's suspicion of me is suspicious. !vote frandelgearslip.

    What the hell does your name mean anyway?

    That I was way into D&D (the game not the forum) when I was younger. I created an email account with that name and since I use the same name for everything (non-professional) I sign up for on the internet, 10 or so years later I am stuck with the name.

    Trust me by now I am quite sick of the name. :P
    Gnasty wrote: »
    Hopefully this Phalla moves slower than the SE one does.

    I had considered signing up for that one, because I love the wheel of time. As soon as I saw them reach 100 pages in less than 3 days I knew I made the right choice by staying away.

    frandelgearslip on
  • PapillonPapillon Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Gnasty is a popular choice

    So I'll vote for them unless a better choice comes along

    Papillon on
  • HylianbunnyHylianbunny Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Let the spontaneous first day votes begin!

    I vote for whoever is in position 34.

    ...and just narrowly missed myself.

    !vote Zerinan.

    Hylianbunny on
  • cj iwakuracj iwakura The Rhythm Regent Chantry of NightmaresRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Who made that man a gunner!?

    cj iwakura on
    9LlOwgn.png
    Well, good morning. Welcome to the new scenario. What should we do today?
  • ZerinanZerinan Registered User
    edited July 2007
    I vote that we all get a nice cup of coffee, because it fixes everything. There is no way someone would have poisoned the coffee at all, nope, not possible. I won't be having any because.... um.... I just took a nap and don't need any caffeine right now, yea, that's it.

    No offense, but I can't let a vote against me go unvoted against. That sounded very odd, but still I vote for HylianBunny to... what do we do with the bad guys? I'm going to go with tossing out the air lock, because that sounds good.

    Edit: Actually, I think we should make the bad guys 'breathe' some deadly superheated plasma. I'm sure it will be very entertaining.

    Zerinan on
    6394_970621.png
  • cj iwakuracj iwakura The Rhythm Regent Chantry of NightmaresRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    The bad guys will be fed to the bears in the zoo.

    ...we have a zoo, right?

    cj iwakura on
    9LlOwgn.png
    Well, good morning. Welcome to the new scenario. What should we do today?
  • DevoutlyApatheticDevoutlyApathetic Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Ah day 1, with the random unfounded bandwagons roam the earth...

    I vote for Plutonium, seriously, he's always evil.

    DevoutlyApathetic on
  • ZerinanZerinan Registered User
    edited July 2007
    cj iwakura wrote: »
    The bad guys will be fed to the bears in the zoo.

    ...we have a zoo, right?

    There's a zoo?! Why hasn't anyone mentioned this before. Would anyone like to help me get some of the more angry animals and take 'em to the Lab. For no reason. I mean, there is a reason, I'm hoping I can cheer them up a bit, I'm not going to combine them to create a super killing machine, because that would be horrible, poor animals.

    Zerinan on
    6394_970621.png
  • Buzz BuzzBuzz Buzz Registered User
    edited July 2007
    Ah day 1, with the random unfounded bandwagons roam the earth...

    I vote for Plutonium, seriously, he's always evil.

    Now here's a bandwagon I can wholeheartedly support.

    I !vote for Plutonium.

    Please don't kill me Plutonium. Not again...

    Buzz Buzz on
  • ThreelemmingsThreelemmings Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    jdarksun wrote: »
    robothero wrote: »
    jdarksun, you sure know an awful lot about monkeys...
    You have to remain ever vigilant. A monkey-based incident can occur at any time. If your focus slips... BAM. All of a sudden, you're doing the simian samba.

    So... you turn people into monkeys? IS THAT A THREAT?

    Damnit, JD, I'm a doctor, not a monkey!

    Threelemmings on
  • SkulkSkulk Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    With all this talk of coffee I hope this station has a bathroom.

    Skulk on
  • PlutoniumPlutonium Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Even when I'm good I'm evil.

    *Twirls mustache*

    Welcome to Phalla, Papillon

    Plutonium on
  • DarkPrimusDarkPrimus Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    I !vote FunkyWaltDo- Wait, what do you mean he's not? Oh fine.

    I will vote for someone after I get back from watching Transformers again- I mean, checking the engine reactor for anomalies.

    DarkPrimus on
    wpyz0Y5.png
    Gamertag: PrimusD | Rock Band DLC | GW:OttW - arrcd | WLD - Thortar
  • spaikspaik Registered User
    edited July 2007
    !vote Kin33 because he's a lying bastard

    spaik on
  • spaikspaik Registered User
    edited July 2007
    This is my second post of the day in case I don't get back tonight.

    spaik on
  • PapillonPapillon Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Plutonium wrote: »
    Even when I'm good I'm evil.

    *Twirls mustache*

    Welcome to Phalla, Papillon

    Noooo....

    No day 1 bandwagons against the new guy. Please?

    On the other hand, I must admit it makes some sense to kill me... I'd guess none of the special powers have been "randomly" distributed to any of the new people... so by killing me at least we won't hit a special by accident.

    Papillon on
  • ThreelemmingsThreelemmings Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    A likely excuse! You're protecting someone... but who?

    Threelemmings on
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