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Dropping eaves

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    divine willydivine willy Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    "aaaabl;aaaaagaaaaaaaaagaaaahhhhhhhhhh"

    an excerpt from the 5 seconds i witnessed of a man in an electric wheelchair (who looked like he could have been parapalegic) as he careened down a hill next to a park i frequent. seriously he must have been going about 25 miles per hour and it didn't seem as though he could stop.

    I'm going to hell but it was possibly the best non-sequitor event of my life.

    divine willy on
    gametag-Crafticus
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    AirAir Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    every now and then theres these really fast loud ads selling doors
    like warehouse sales on doors

    i laughed when i overheard

    "you ever see those warehouse ads for doors? the ones where the guy keeps yelling the word 'doors' all the time?
    who is the guy who sees that ad and says 'shit i need a door'
    tumbleweeds rolling through his living room or something"

    Air on
    darjeelingshortsig95.jpg
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    nevilleneville The Worst Gay (Seriously. The Worst!)Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Sara Lynn wrote: »
    Overheard in NY is the greatest website ever.

    Young woman #1: Guys never want to eat me out.
    Middle-aged dad with kids: Hey, we're trying to eat over here.
    Young woman #1: See, even hearing about it freaks them out.
    Young man at next table: Maybe I can take a look for you and give you my assessment.
    Middle-aged dad with kids: For God's sake, this is a family restaurant!
    Young woman #2: You have a very controversial vagina.

    --Mickey D's, Times Squar

    ahahahahahahah
    the location on that one sends it to the moon
    A+

    neville on
    nevillexmassig1.png
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    JordynJordyn Really, Commander? Probing Uranus. Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    one time when I was working at a hotel, I walked into the laundry room to hear the two head housekeepers talking about the one's daughter dating "a colored person."

    I was all "uuuuuuuh....." and left the room as quickly as possible.

    Jordyn on
    thumbsupguy-1.jpg
    JordynNolz.com <- All my blogs (Shepard, Wasted, J'onn, DCAU) are here now!
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    PoorochondriacPoorochondriac Ah, man Ah, jeezRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    "aaaabl;aaaaagaaaaaaaaagaaaahhhhhhhhhh"

    an excerpt from the 5 seconds i witnessed of a man in an electric wheelchair (who looked like he could have been parapalegic) as he careened down a hill next to a park i frequent. seriously he must have been going about 25 miles per hour and it didn't seem as though he could stop.

    I'm going to hell but it was possibly the best non-sequitor event of my life.

    Related. And also hilarious.

    Poorochondriac on
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    Bloods EndBloods End Blade of Tyshalle Punch dimensionRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Moaned like a librarian?

    What the hell does that even mean?

    Bloods End on
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    AirAir Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    haha thatd be a sight to see

    also funny is the idea of muscular dystrophy camp

    Air on
    darjeelingshortsig95.jpg
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    PikaPuffPikaPuff Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Heard this today at Metreon.

    "Remember [Name]? He named his kid Kaiba."

    PikaPuff on
    jCyyTSo.png
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    DarmakDarmak RAGE vympyvvhyc vyctyvyRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    I remember this one time my roommate and his girlfriend were screaming at each other while they were drunk as hell (happens quite often), and she stops and says, "I HATE ALCOHOL, I HATE IT, I HATE IT, I HATE IT!", all the while slurring. Oh the irony.

    Darmak on
    JtgVX0H.png
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    Blake TBlake T Do you have enemies then? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Wandering into my apartment going up the stairs I overhead the following words screamed downed the phone.

    "We were fucking married with a kid and you slept with my goddam brother for christs sake."

    I think at one time he also called her a whore.

    This yelling match went for over an hour since I eventually left again as I was sick and tired of hearing his problems.

    Blake T on
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    Homestar GunnerHomestar Gunner Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    These people probably know superhero mythology better than any of us.
    Black guy: Yeah, Superman -- he hangs out around 42nd Street. He might go uptown every once in a while, but you never see his ass in Brooklyn. That's ridiculous -- Superman can not be killed by bullets, and he still won't come to Brooklyn.

    Black lady: You're right. What about Batman?

    Black guy: Oh, he probably has to come through Brooklyn -- you know, that brother lives out on Long Island.

    Black lady: He probably comes through Brooklyn, but you know he's not getting out of that Batmobile.

    Black guy: I'm sure he's damn careful when he stops, too. Those are some ballin' rims he's got on that whip. If he ever parked, them shits would definitely get stolen!

    Homestar Gunner on
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    KPCKPC Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Working with old chinese people has its perks.
    Re: the prospect of having kids later on in life: "Just freeze your egg, Reilene."
    Re: not wanting to have kids later on in life: "Tell your husband to get vasectomy."
    Bonus points for those who can imagine it being said in a thick chinese accent.

    Good times.

    KPC on
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    WiseguyWiseguy __BANNED USERS regular
    edited July 2007
    that sounds like dave chappelle stand up
    all black people must be funny

    Wiseguy on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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    VivixenneVivixenne Remember your training, and we'll get through this just fine. Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    KPC wrote: »
    Working with old chinese people has its perks.
    Re: the prospect of having kids later on in life: "Just freeze your egg, Reilene."
    Re: not wanting to have kids later on in life: "Tell your husband to get vasectomy."
    Bonus points for those who can imagine it being said in a thick chinese accent.

    Good times.

    I'm not all together sure how that's amusing, and trust me when I say that I am very good at imagining shit spoken in Chinglish.

    Vivixenne on
    XBOX: NOVADELPHINI | DISCORD: NOVADELPHINI #7387 | TWITTER
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    Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Hrm...better to drop eaves than to drop loads.

    "No. Lischun tooooo meee. I FAAWT IN VEEE-IT-NAAAAM. LET ME WASHAPLATE."

    Calamity Jane on
    twitter https://twitter.com/mperezwritesirl michelle patreon https://www.patreon.com/thatwronglove michelle's comic book from IMAGE COMICS you can order http://a.co/dn5YeUD
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    TossrockTossrock too weird to live too rare to dieRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Damn, I just saw the quote by Stale in Nevi's sig on that heard it in new york site.

    This is worse than finding out about Santa

    Tossrock on
    sig.png
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    AirAir Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    These people probably know superhero mythology better than any of us.
    Black guy: Yeah, Superman -- he hangs out around 42nd Street. He might go uptown every once in a while, but you never see his ass in Brooklyn. That's ridiculous -- Superman can not be killed by bullets, and he still won't come to Brooklyn.

    Black lady: You're right. What about Batman?

    Black guy: Oh, he probably has to come through Brooklyn -- you know, that brother lives out on Long Island.

    Black lady: He probably comes through Brooklyn, but you know he's not getting out of that Batmobile.

    Black guy: I'm sure he's damn careful when he stops, too. Those are some ballin' rims he's got on that whip. If he ever parked, them shits would definitely get stolen!
    Wiseguy wrote: »
    that sounds like dave chappelle stand up
    all black people must be funny


    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c8wN_cA-fQg

    Air on
    darjeelingshortsig95.jpg
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    WiseguyWiseguy __BANNED USERS regular
    edited July 2007
    that was splendid. thank you, sir.

    Wiseguy on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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    space_satanspace_satan __BANNED USERS regular
    edited July 2007
    Air wrote: »
    haha thatd be a sight to see

    also funny is the idea of muscular dystrophy camp

    DUDE! muscular dystrophy camp! not to derail but i saw signs for MDA camp all over an area of my town. at first we didnt know what it meant so we made a game of guessing. the game pretty much ended after we decided it must mean. Moms Doing Anal camp.

    space_satan on
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    AirAir Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    well muscular dystrophy does not abbreviate to MDA so you could be right

    Air on
    darjeelingshortsig95.jpg
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    Penguin IncarnatePenguin Incarnate King of Kafiristan Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    I dunno how to spell any of the things they taught me to say
    Tu me fait chien quoi!

    Penguin Incarnate on
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    space_satanspace_satan __BANNED USERS regular
    edited July 2007
    Air wrote: »
    well muscular dystrophy does not abbreviate to MDA so you could be right

    Muscular Dystrophy Association

    space_satan on
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    AirAir Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    oh okay then
    i thought you might try and say 'awareness' and that would have been stupid

    association works well though

    Air on
    darjeelingshortsig95.jpg
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    space_satanspace_satan __BANNED USERS regular
    edited July 2007
    overheard conversation at work. a bondee was talking with his cosigner.

    Bondee: Hey motherfucker get down here right now! no i aint got no time for you to take a shower! get the fuck down here! what!? you cant do that! motherfucker i'd go back to jail. I AINT GOING BACK NO MATTER WHAT I DONT CARE IF I HAVE TO RUN!!!

    after this the guy realized that he's standing in an office with 3 people armed and close enough to grab him and MAKE him go back to jail. long story short he looked very embarassed and called another co-signer.

    space_satan on
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    PikaPuffPikaPuff Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Overheard a mom talking about military flights on the shuttle to the military flight we're taking. She was talking about her army days when she saw the army's mascot, a mule, strapped to a pallet of luggage. That's how they flew the mule around, by strapping it together along with everyone's luggage and cargo.

    PikaPuff on
    jCyyTSo.png
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    sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Framling wrote: »
    Every whispered sentence I overheard this past weekend was in French, so bonne chance.

    This was a good post, Fram.

    sarukun on
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    sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    jmillikin wrote: »
    Overheard in New York is great for this sort of stuff
    Kindly gent: What do you want to be when you grow up?
    Little kid: Retarded!
    Kindly gent: Retarded?
    Little kid: My grandpa is retarded, and he gets to play and watch TV all day!
    Kindly gent: [Stunned silence]
    Kid's mom: He means 'retired.'
    Little kid: Retarded! Retarded! Retarded! I wanna be retarded! [Starts to cry]

    That is so great.

    sarukun on
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    sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Air wrote: »
    every now and then theres these really fast loud ads selling doors
    like warehouse sales on doors

    i laughed when i overheard

    "you ever see those warehouse ads for doors? the ones where the guy keeps yelling the word 'doors' all the time?
    who is the guy who sees that ad and says 'shit i need a door'
    tumbleweeds rolling through his living room or something"

    Jesus air, that's fucking great.

    sarukun on
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    sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    These people probably know superhero mythology better than any of us.
    Black guy: Yeah, Superman -- he hangs out around 42nd Street. He might go uptown every once in a while, but you never see his ass in Brooklyn. That's ridiculous -- Superman can not be killed by bullets, and he still won't come to Brooklyn.

    Black lady: You're right. What about Batman?

    Black guy: Oh, he probably has to come through Brooklyn -- you know, that brother lives out on Long Island.

    Black lady: He probably comes through Brooklyn, but you know he's not getting out of that Batmobile.

    Black guy: I'm sure he's damn careful when he stops, too. Those are some ballin' rims he's got on that whip. If he ever parked, them shits would definitely get stolen!

    I would have jumped into that conversation and politely explained that A) batmobile has a shield and B) batman gets out of the car wherever the fuck he wants.

    sarukun on
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    NogsNogs Crap, crap, mega crap. Crap, crap, mega crap.Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Sam or Ave. Have either of you had the chance to meet Barakee? The Dinkytown/Riverside guy that goes around talking about religion and philosophy and hands out his poems? That guy will lead you into some interesting conversations.

    Nogs on
    rotate.jpg
    PARKER, YOU'RE FIRED! <-- My comic book podcast! Satan look here!
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    WiseguyWiseguy __BANNED USERS regular
    edited July 2007
    brilliant work there, chap

    Wiseguy on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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    mcpmcp Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Not really eavesdropping I don't think...

    I was walking home from work one day, and this teenage girl walked in front of this old guy with a walker. He said, `God damn that's a sweet ass.' Dirty old men are pretty awesome.

    I heard a bartender say to a bouncer once, `You're fired for dancing like a white guy!'

    mcp on
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    KPCKPC Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Vivixenne wrote: »
    KPC wrote: »
    Working with old chinese people has its perks.
    Re: the prospect of having kids later on in life: "Just freeze your egg, Reilene."
    Re: not wanting to have kids later on in life: "Tell your husband to get vasectomy."
    Bonus points for those who can imagine it being said in a thick chinese accent.

    Good times.

    I'm not all together sure how that's amusing, and trust me when I say that I am very good at imagining shit spoken in Chinglish.
    One should never take advice in Chinglish, especially when it involves your reproductive organs.

    KPC on
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    RiotcowRiotcow Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited July 2007
    why do people think that vitamins will help their hair that makes no sense

    Riotcow on
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    FabricateFabricate __BANNED USERS regular
    edited July 2007
    A lot of things about the human body don't make sense.


    Pineapples make your semen sweet.


    How the fuck does that happen?

    Fabricate on
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    Zombies Tossed My Salad!Zombies Tossed My Salad! Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Fabricate wrote: »
    A lot of things about the human body don't make sense.


    Pineapples make your semen sweet.


    How the fuck does that happen?
    This is completely false. There is no medical documentation that it works, and I've tried it my self.

    Zombies Tossed My Salad! on
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    World as MythWorld as Myth a breezy way to annoy serious people Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    ZeroZero wrote: »
    Fabricate wrote: »
    A lot of things about the human body don't make sense.


    Pineapples make your semen sweet.


    How the fuck does that happen?
    This is completely false. There is no medical documentation that it works, and I've tried it my self.
    wait, who was the taste-tester?

    World as Myth on
    kQwcZLJ.png
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    WiseguyWiseguy __BANNED USERS regular
    edited July 2007
    a group of 5 randomly selected people

    there was also a control group, you see

    drinkin' jizz

    Wiseguy on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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    Zombies Tossed My Salad!Zombies Tossed My Salad! Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    ZeroZero wrote: »
    Fabricate wrote: »
    A lot of things about the human body don't make sense.


    Pineapples make your semen sweet.


    How the fuck does that happen?
    This is completely false. There is no medical documentation that it works, and I've tried it my self.
    wait, who was the taste-tester?
    My girl friend

    Zombies Tossed My Salad! on
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    Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister It Gets Worse before it gets any better.Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    ZeroZero wrote: »
    ZeroZero wrote: »
    Fabricate wrote: »
    A lot of things about the human body don't make sense.


    Pineapples make your semen sweet.


    How the fuck does that happen?
    This is completely false. There is no medical documentation that it works, and I've tried it my self.
    wait, who was the taste-tester?
    WHAT I DO IN MY OWN HOME IS MY BUSINESS AND NO ONE ELSE'S!

    Metzger Meister on
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