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Jalapeño + Vagina = BAD (Fuck Ups)

Akilae729Akilae729 Registered User regular
edited July 2007 in Social Entropy++
So last night I make chicken tacos and cut up a bunch of Jalapeños. Being absent minded i forgot to wash my hands and went to finger my girlfriend. Lo and Behold I deposited the hot fiery Jalapeño oils directly where they dont belong.

It looked and sounded like this was really painful, and a few minutes later I got the Jalapeño in my eye and if it hurt in any fashion like that, well shit, i'm lucky i didnt get hit in the face for being a dumbass.

So SE++, i remember one of these a while back, sexual fuck ups time!

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Akilae729 on
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Posts

  • QuetziQuetzi Here we may reign secure, and in my choice, To reign is worth ambition though in HellRegistered User, Moderator mod
    edited July 2007
    Hahahaha good lord this is fantastic.

    Quetzi on
  • TrellTrell __BANNED USERS regular
    edited July 2007
    Akilae729 wrote: »
    Hey guys, let me tell you about my girlfriend.
    boy howdy, she musta had a hot temper after that one.

    Trell on
    ori's modding is stupid and arbitrary and based on no actual rule system but rather wind patterns and astrology.
  • JordynJordyn Really, Commander? Probing Uranus. Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    God, I'm going back to bed.

    It is too early for vagina/jalapeno stories.

    Jordyn on
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    JordynNolz.com <- All my blogs (Shepard, Wasted, J'onn, DCAU) are here now!
  • WeaverWeaver Breakfast Witch Hashus BrowniusRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    rated 5 stars

    Weaver on
  • NogsNogs Crap, crap, mega crap. Crap, crap, mega crap.Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    did you get jalapeno in the eye by doing what i think you did? Furthermore, did you keep going and get spicy dick?

    Nogs on
    rotate.jpg
    PARKER, YOU'RE FIRED! <-- My comic book podcast! Satan look here!
  • Akilae729Akilae729 Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Nogs wrote: »
    did you get jalapeno in the eye by doing what i think you did? Furthermore, did you keep going and get spicy dick?

    To be honest, I started laughing, wiped a tear out my eye and all of a sudden was like OH FUCK Jalapeño!!!

    And i did have the sense to not end up with Jalapeño ding dong

    Akilae729 on
    signaturebighe7.jpg
  • ZephyrZephyr Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    good thing it wasn't her butthole.

    pooping fire.

    Zephyr on
    16kakxt.jpg
  • AirAir Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-gBvx0zuDM8


    the reason for this kicks in at 4:45

    Air on
    darjeelingshortsig95.jpg
  • MonkeybombMonkeybomb Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    I'm picturing everything escalating way out of control and everything in this dude's place covered with jalepeno extract.


    firefox suggests I use this in place of jalenpeno:

    penologist

    Monkeybomb on
    Xbox Live Gamertag: Triplemonkeybom
    monkeysig-1.jpg
  • Akilae729Akilae729 Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Air wrote: »
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-gBvx0zuDM8


    the reason for this kicks in at 4:45

    damnit, i have to leave for work right now

    when i get back

    Akilae729 on
    signaturebighe7.jpg
  • Synthetic OrangeSynthetic Orange Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    cornbrator.jpg

    Synthetic Orange on
  • PiptheFairPiptheFair Frequently not in boats. Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    boy, was her vagina red

    PiptheFair on
  • satansfingerssatansfingers Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    i can't imagine going from making tacos to fingering a girl

    satansfingers on
  • gazamcgazamc Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    that is one hyper wank device alright

    gazamc on
  • ZephyrZephyr Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    satansfingers wrote: »
    i can't imagine going from making tacos to fingering a girl

    insert pink taco joke here.

    Zephyr on
    16kakxt.jpg
  • Anime OwnsAnime Owns Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Air wrote: »
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-gBvx0zuDM8


    the reason for this kicks in at 4:45

    I was half expecting him to start breathing fire.

    Anime Owns on
  • AirAir Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    aww

    is that from 4chan or somethin

    Air on
    darjeelingshortsig95.jpg
  • PakuPaku Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    satansfingers wrote: »
    i can't imagine going from making tacos to fingering a girl

    maybe they were fish tacos

    Paku on
  • GABBO GABBO GABBOGABBO GABBO GABBO Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Akilae729 wrote: »
    So last night I make chicken tacos and cut up a bunch of Jalapeños. Being absent minded i forgot to wash my hands and went to finger my girlfriend. Lo and Behold I deposited the hot fiery Jalapeño oils directly where they dont belong.

    It looked and sounded like this was really painful, and a few minutes later I got the Jalapeño in my eye and if it hurt in any fashion like that, well shit, i'm lucky i didnt get hit in the face for being a dumbass.

    So SE++, i remember one of these a while back, sexual fuck ups time!

    ohsnapped.jpg


    (Oh god I took that off of my tv the other day, and I've been dying to use it.)

    GABBO GABBO GABBO on
  • OldSundownOldSundown Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    amazingemote-1.gif

    OldSundown on
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  • ButtersButters A glass of some milks Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    This is a very good thread.

    EDIT: HA HA HA, Mani! That is awesome!

    Butters on
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  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    I remember a story on fark similar to this, dude had to keep his junk in a cup of milk.

    Preacher on
    I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.

    pleasepaypreacher.net
  • Vlad McRadVlad McRad Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    dee colon

    DEE COLON

    Vlad McRad on
  • Evil MultifariousEvil Multifarious Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    This one time I went down on my (now ex) girlfriend and she spasmed violently and drove her clitoris into my front teeth.

    I laughed pretty hard; her, not so much.

    Evil Multifarious on
  • AirAir Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    manifest i think you could have waited for a more appropriate time to use that

    and when i say "more" i mean " "

    Air on
    darjeelingshortsig95.jpg
  • GABBO GABBO GABBOGABBO GABBO GABBO Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Air wrote: »
    manifest i think you could have waited for a more appropriate time to use that

    and when i say "more" i mean " "

    I just didn't have the patience to wait.

    GABBO GABBO GABBO on
  • AirAir Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    i know

    i too have prematurely blown my load on what was supposed to be a dry run

    Air on
    darjeelingshortsig95.jpg
  • OldSundownOldSundown Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Virtues are for nuns.

    OldSundown on
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  • RemingtonRemington Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Dumbest thing I ever did was back in high school in the middle of a make out session I put my finger under a girls nose and said "haha mustache."

    Remington on
  • Synthetic OrangeSynthetic Orange Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Haha, faux pas.

    Synthetic Orange on
  • OldSundownOldSundown Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Dumbest...or Greatest? :winky:

    OldSundown on
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] new member
    edited July 2007
    The user and all related content has been deleted.

    [Deleted User] on
  • Synthetic OrangeSynthetic Orange Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    How many teeth did he take this time? :(

    Synthetic Orange on
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] new member
    edited July 2007
    The user and all related content has been deleted.

    [Deleted User] on
  • BriareosBriareos Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    You were making tacos, and all of a sudden, you thought, "Hm, what else was I going to do? Oh yeah! Finger the girlfriend. Better get right on that."

    D:

    Briareos on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • JordynJordyn Really, Commander? Probing Uranus. Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Manifest wrote: »
    Air wrote: »
    manifest i think you could have waited for a more appropriate time to use that

    and when i say "more" i mean " "

    I just didn't have the patience to wait.

    God, I know that feeling.

    Jordyn on
    thumbsupguy-1.jpg
    JordynNolz.com <- All my blogs (Shepard, Wasted, J'onn, DCAU) are here now!
  • AirAir Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    sounds like you lose tfs

    you got beat and your family is now kinda broken

    your brother is in the system

    Air on
    darjeelingshortsig95.jpg
  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Yeah I don't follow that line of thought, I could see "I was making tacos had to take a piss and forgot and wammo jalapeno cock" but jumping from dinner to fingering without washing your hands. That says something about you.

    Preacher on
    I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.

    pleasepaypreacher.net
  • AirAir Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    i mean

    my sympathies

    Air on
    darjeelingshortsig95.jpg
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] new member
    edited July 2007
    The user and all related content has been deleted.

    [Deleted User] on
This discussion has been closed.
Penny Arcade Forums› Social Entropy++