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So I'm thinking "Hey, that wasn't so OH MY FUCKING SHIT CHRIST GODDAMN WHORE CUNT FUCK YOU!"
This is why I always tell doctors to not warn me about pain.
They give me that eyebrow like "Oh, he's a tough guy, eh?" and then I explain that I know it's going to hurt - I just don't need the descriptions, since they're always wrong.
Also - is anyone else sick and damned tired of this new "pain management" question they give you in the E.R.?
"On a scale of 1-10, how bad is the pain?"
On a scale of mustard - plaid, how tight are your socks?
4 years ago I had a scare - just got over a cold, and I sneezed hard enough to crack a rib in my upper left chest area. Thought I was having a heart attack - stabbing pain right there is not good.
So I get in the E.R. and as they're strapping a billion machines that go "ping" onto me, this one nurse snaps his fingers to get my attention and asks "how bad is the pain on a scale of 1-10?"
And I'm like N-Werd Whut?
So I told him it was about an eight, and they gave me a shit-ton of demerol right into the IV and I was one stoooooooooned kitten for a while.
Then last year I damn near sliced my damn finger off, and I hit the ER again, and there's that damn question again. (this time I was like "It's a four, but my damn finger is bleeding and flopping here, so let's just focus on that, okay?")
I mean, I'm covered in tattoos and piercings, have a nifty half-moon scar on my right cheek where a guy once kicked my face with a logging boot... so it makes me wonder how they're even going to interpret my answer. If my 1 is a papercut, and 10 is having second-degree burns to your mouth and washing it out with listerine, where does an 8 fall? Is their ten my ten? Should I do fucking algebra to come up with the nearest whole integer? Are we doing decimal places or fractions? And will someone PLEASE STOP THE BLEEDING AND SEW MY GODDAMN FINGER BACK ON?
Also - is anyone else sick and damned tired of this new "pain management" question they give you in the E.R.?
"On a scale of 1-10, how bad is the pain?"
On a scale of mustard - plaid, how tight are your socks?
That's actually a nation wide government mandated thing. Doctors are suppose to ask everyone about pain, treat the pain and then your suppose to ask again to show you treated the pain. JCAHO(the organization that regulates hospitals) said pain was being ignored and they recommended the 1-10 scale.
i think i get this same thing sometimes... like right below my belly button, so sharp and intense and stabbing that its nearly impossible to stand up straight or breathe deep.... sorta sucks but only happens like once every few months or so
did he ever find out if he was dying? i can't be arsed to read the fucking whole thread
Also - is anyone else sick and damned tired of this new "pain management" question they give you in the E.R.?
"On a scale of 1-10, how bad is the pain?"
On a scale of mustard - plaid, how tight are your socks?
That's actually a nation wide government mandated thing. Doctors are suppose to ask everyone about pain, treat the pain and then your suppose to ask again to show you treated the pain. JCAHO(the organization that regulates hospitals) said pain was being ignored and they recommended the 1-10 scale.
"hey how much does this hurt on a scale of 1 - 10?"
"a fucking lot, now give me some vicodin"
"here's some motrin ib!"
"bastard"
true story!
Dead Legend on
diablo III - beardsnbeer#1508 Mechwarrior Online - Rusty Bock
when i was a little kid i used to go in for laser removal surgery for my birthmark (i have a capillary hemangioma covering large parts of my arms/chest/upper back). they would always say the laser felt just like a rubber band snapping your skin. then they'd start and i'd be like "YEAH RIGHT ASSHOLES."
then i stopped getting the treatment because fuck that, this birthmark is awesome.
sometimes, very very rarely lately, i get a sudden sharp pain in the very back of my skull, nearly blinding. wears off after about ten seconds, but causes me to drop what i was doing and clutch my head and curse in two languages
so i go on WebMD and i show every single one of the symptoms
so that was an awesome couple of days searching through leukemia sites and the different types and whatnot
so after i had the bone marrow biopsy (which was the single most painful thing i have ever had to go through) and the doctor that did it said she was confident it was negative because of the consistency of the marrow, but i wouldnt get the results back for a week
but before then i got better and i even played in the JR varsity football game five days after the test
nobody was able to tell me what i had, just an 'aggressive virus'
Posts
that's a lot of workin'
good old college
stealing my money
a cookie to you
adieu, good night
night happy populace
and for when I got circumcised
but I'll be damned if I took my painkillers afterward
dick
with
a
hammer
hammers made specially to hit dicks with
dick hammers
think about that
dick hammers
someone can make that name catchy as hell, I'm sure
where's the PR department, they need to get on this
Willy Whappers
Dong Destroyers
The Eunicher 5000
This is why I always tell doctors to not warn me about pain.
They give me that eyebrow like "Oh, he's a tough guy, eh?" and then I explain that I know it's going to hurt - I just don't need the descriptions, since they're always wrong.
Also - is anyone else sick and damned tired of this new "pain management" question they give you in the E.R.?
"On a scale of 1-10, how bad is the pain?"
On a scale of mustard - plaid, how tight are your socks?
do they really ask those questions?
i mean really
4 years ago I had a scare - just got over a cold, and I sneezed hard enough to crack a rib in my upper left chest area. Thought I was having a heart attack - stabbing pain right there is not good.
So I get in the E.R. and as they're strapping a billion machines that go "ping" onto me, this one nurse snaps his fingers to get my attention and asks "how bad is the pain on a scale of 1-10?"
And I'm like N-Werd Whut?
So I told him it was about an eight, and they gave me a shit-ton of demerol right into the IV and I was one stoooooooooned kitten for a while.
Then last year I damn near sliced my damn finger off, and I hit the ER again, and there's that damn question again. (this time I was like "It's a four, but my damn finger is bleeding and flopping here, so let's just focus on that, okay?")
I mean, I'm covered in tattoos and piercings, have a nifty half-moon scar on my right cheek where a guy once kicked my face with a logging boot... so it makes me wonder how they're even going to interpret my answer. If my 1 is a papercut, and 10 is having second-degree burns to your mouth and washing it out with listerine, where does an 8 fall? Is their ten my ten? Should I do fucking algebra to come up with the nearest whole integer? Are we doing decimal places or fractions? And will someone PLEASE STOP THE BLEEDING AND SEW MY GODDAMN FINGER BACK ON?
How in the fuck
I pretty much have the costco size bottle of Vicodin sitting in my medicine cabinet.
I believe that was my exact response.
Verbatim.
Why are you following me?
That's actually a nation wide government mandated thing. Doctors are suppose to ask everyone about pain, treat the pain and then your suppose to ask again to show you treated the pain. JCAHO(the organization that regulates hospitals) said pain was being ignored and they recommended the 1-10 scale.
Wii Friend Code: 0072 4984 2399 2126
PSN ID : Theidar
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Behold the annhilation of the extraterrestrial and the rise of the machines.
Hail Satan!
WISHLIST
did he ever find out if he was dying? i can't be arsed to read the fucking whole thread
"hey how much does this hurt on a scale of 1 - 10?"
"a fucking lot, now give me some vicodin"
"here's some motrin ib!"
"bastard"
true story!
then i stopped getting the treatment because fuck that, this birthmark is awesome.
And then I laugh some fucking more.
i get out they were like tylenol will be fine
i used to get this when i worked out
like unbearable pain where i couldnt even think
edit: oh fuck eleven pages
STEAM!
right after rocking out
its my eardrums cheering for me
STEAM!
i thought it would make a good name for a journalist, or a soldier
Dick Hammers, reporting for duty
yes
sort of
well what would you describe it as
It's kind of like an electronic whistle, like one flat tone and volume until it cuts out
You know like when you stand near a TV that's on, and you can hear that hum of the parts inside
It only happens in one ear at a time
annoying
Huh what
What does this mean
I check my symptoms to see what causes this funny smell in my nose sometimes and get back three results
All three are EPILEPSY
i thought i had mono or something
so i go on WebMD and i show every single one of the symptoms
so that was an awesome couple of days searching through leukemia sites and the different types and whatnot
so after i had the bone marrow biopsy (which was the single most painful thing i have ever had to go through) and the doctor that did it said she was confident it was negative because of the consistency of the marrow, but i wouldnt get the results back for a week
but before then i got better and i even played in the JR varsity football game five days after the test
nobody was able to tell me what i had, just an 'aggressive virus'
STEAM!