Dating
claxton
ClubPA regular
ClubPA regular
What are some good dates to take girls on? Something other than a movie. I'm back in college and I'm not that imaginative on dating ideas. Also, if you have a funny story or want to vent about dating you can do that here. Just give an idea for a date first.
Its not enough to win. You want nothing left of your enemy but a skull nailed to a fence post so everybody understands the cost of crossing you. -Durga
claxton on
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Thats a good first date.
sometimes i do it day month year
Hearthstone - Webber #1330
3DS: 0920-3235-4071
or you could go protest a museum!
sky diving
sky diving is expensive. would I be expected to pay for her? and that would be like two weeks into dating at the earliest
wuss
Hum along to music videos with kazoos.
Hearthstone - Webber #1330
3DS: 0920-3235-4071
Pray next to eachother
Fuck you in your ass.
you had me at 'go to the winchester'
Hearthstone - Webber #1330
3DS: 0920-3235-4071
kinky
that way you don't have to worry about competition
His truck had those manual roll up windows, so while they were driving, he yells 'WINDOW RACE!' and starts rolling the window up as fast as possible.
Do that.
The plan was for me to pick her up a little before seven and we'd go to the movie. Beyond that, I had some possible ideas (get some food, whatever) based on how the movie went. I picked her up around 6:45, following the poor directions I'd been given. The ride to the theater was alright; we talked about mutual friends and john cusak movies. I paid for the tickets and drinks. At this point, everything is ok.
We sit down, and she puts her feet up on the seat in front of her. Then she starts laughing. I ask what's funny, as I'm expected to, and she tells me the position of her feet reminds her of being at the gynecologist. I chuckle, but then she goes into a long description of how she was nervous the first time, and that her doctor was a "huge black guy with gentle fingers." At this point, I'm a little wary, but we're both pretty quiet for the rest of the film, and, enheartened, I suggest we get something to eat. "Sure," she says. "Let's gank some food!" This is something I begin to notice, her using WoW expressions in general conversation. I am told, at one point, to stoo-foo (STFU)
It is during dinner conversation that I realize I'm on a date with a lunatic.
I cannot completely recreate the experience, rather, I will list for you the topics of conversation, all of which she was vehemently in support of:
Cosplaying.
Crossplaying.
All anime, ever. I was treated to in-depth ploy synopses of no less than 6 of her favorites.
Erotic fanfiction.
Erotic *slash* fanfiction
Erotic slash fanfiction featuring Harry Potter characters
Bondage, preferably with duct tape.
Losing her virginity at 13 to a 22-year-old
At this point, I'm a little terrified.
When we get back to her place, I figure I'll bolt out at the first opportunity, but then she pulls out her laptop. I figure she's checking her email, but no, it's time to play WoW. And it's time for me to watch. This goes on for about half an hour, to my dismay, and then she asks me if I've ever had anything shoved up my ass.
I turn, hoping, praying, that she's kidding.
She isn't.
She pulls out Cosmopolitan and begins reading aloud from a list titled "Things you should do to surprise him in bed" Top of the list, apparently, is a surprise finger up the anus. She says "Maybe we can try that later," and smiles.
I blink, twice.
"Hey, do you want to read my poetry?"
Before I can answer, she's typing in a url, and the next thing I know I'm reading "Cutting deep/ I'm not a sheep"
She's making me read her cutter poetry. And it's awful. And plentiful. And autobiographical.
Her cat comes in, and she says "Hey, check this out!" She pulls out a roll of duct tape, pulls off a strip, and, before I can object, puts in on the cat's back and yanks it off. I also notice, horrified, that the cat has no tail.
"Cool, huh? He doesn't even feel it."
She takes the duct tape, covered on one side with cat fur, and, with a flourish, puts it in her own mouth.
It's here where I make my exit.
tl;dr: I spend an evening with the dark side of the internet.
How about you guys? Bad dates? Share your pain to ease mine.
That, would be a great first date to try and emulate. Enjoy
Then again, you don't want to be stuck staring at each other without a topic of conversation.
A daytime meeting takes the heat off. Lunch or coffee is a good start.
I'd personally recommend a bare knuckle fight though, with her as your opponent. Nothing is quite as bonding as a fist to the face.
ha ha
i 'unno, a cup of coffee?
seriously I saw that shit on fight club it taught me that fighting is awesome
in sudan
- After getting her in the car, around dusk time, lock the doors and make sure she notices.
- Drive for about 2hrs, and dont say a word. Look her in the eyes at random times and smile.
- Turn off on a dirt road and drive another hour into a clearing in the woods.
- Exit car, leave headlights on, strip naked. Dance naked and rub the blood of a dead goat all over your body as you do.
- Get back in the car, still bloody and naked, and still, dont say a word.
- Drive all the way back and drop her off where you picked her up.
- Thank her for the date, tell her that her shoes are pretty, and ask for another.
- If she says yes, you have a winner. If she says No, dont unlock the door until she says yes.
- Rinse and repeat.
no girl is worth that much effort
edit: by end well would she like it.
if they can't get their date to go on a second date then try again
or
never be with a woman ever
that way you never propagate
it's nature's way of telling you, you should have picked a different location for your date
except it's eighty years later and you're dead and no one knew who you were for the last 50 years of your life
Comment on her pretty lips, stare silently at them for a good 3 minutes, then snap out of it and go to a pizza place.