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What's the most embarrassing thing you've ever said to a female?

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    mcpmcp Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    celery77 wrote: »
    mcp wrote: »
    I met a gay dude on Saturday.

    He was pretty nice. He grabbed my crotch and offered me cocaine.
    I got propositioned by a guy who I can only assume had at least some homosexual tendencies once.

    I don't care what you say, it's nice to know someone is willing to pay to have sex with you.

    Are you straight? A lot of really attractive gay people usually take it up as a challenge to gay up the straight. Sort of like how men who think they are all that and more will charm the engaged women.

    I've had so many lesbians try to fix me, and my ex was constantly having his friend turn him to the 'Bright side'.
    Yeah, I am.

    But fuck.. it was $100. I probably would have done it if he didn't have a beard.

    Body/facial hair grosses me out.

    mcp on
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    Dead China DollDead China Doll Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    mcp wrote: »
    celery77 wrote: »
    mcp wrote: »
    I met a gay dude on Saturday.

    He was pretty nice. He grabbed my crotch and offered me cocaine.
    I got propositioned by a guy who I can only assume had at least some homosexual tendencies once.

    I don't care what you say, it's nice to know someone is willing to pay to have sex with you.

    Are you straight? A lot of really attractive gay people usually take it up as a challenge to gay up the straight. Sort of like how men who think they are all that and more will charm the engaged women.

    I've had so many lesbians try to fix me, and my ex was constantly having his friend turn him to the 'Bright side'.
    Yeah, I am.

    But fuck.. it was $100. I probably would have done it if he didn't have a beard.

    Body/facial hair grosses me out.

    You could have looked at him suggestively and requested that you help shave his beard.
    100 dollars and a free gay episode, and a little tip on the side.

    hoho.

    Dead China Doll on
    thechicken.gif
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    space_satanspace_satan __BANNED USERS regular
    edited August 2007
    I once told a girl that she would be prettier if she didnt have a face. i didnt mean it to come out that way. i was just somehwere else and it was more like a freudian slip.

    was she a butterface

    no. i meant to say something completely different but i was reading or in the middle of another conversation. actually. i guess she was a butterface a bit. i would hit it.

    space_satan on
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    tuggatugga Makin' movies Makin' songsRegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    but youre from guthrie

    theres not much to choose from

    tugga on
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    mcpmcp Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    mcp wrote: »
    celery77 wrote: »
    mcp wrote: »
    I met a gay dude on Saturday.

    He was pretty nice. He grabbed my crotch and offered me cocaine.
    I got propositioned by a guy who I can only assume had at least some homosexual tendencies once.

    I don't care what you say, it's nice to know someone is willing to pay to have sex with you.

    Are you straight? A lot of really attractive gay people usually take it up as a challenge to gay up the straight. Sort of like how men who think they are all that and more will charm the engaged women.

    I've had so many lesbians try to fix me, and my ex was constantly having his friend turn him to the 'Bright side'.
    Yeah, I am.

    But fuck.. it was $100. I probably would have done it if he didn't have a beard.

    Body/facial hair grosses me out.

    You could have looked at him suggestively and requested that you help shave his beard.
    100 dollars and a free gay episode, and a little tip on the side.

    hoho.
    D:

    no.

    mcp on
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    tsplittertsplitter Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    christ IE7 is a bitch to install

    tsplitter on
    FqmsaJ6.png
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    space_satanspace_satan __BANNED USERS regular
    edited August 2007
    tugga wrote: »
    but youre from guthrie

    theres not much to choose from

    No. theres nothing to choose from. i date girls from edmond. Guthrie girls all have STD's. like. no shit. a recent study showed that 79 percent of guthrie teen girls have an STD or are pregnant. i was like. AMAZING!

    space_satan on
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    JimothyJimothy Not in front of the fox he's with the owlRegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    neville wrote: »
    I don't think it was one thing, I questioned in high school but was seriously repressed. And in college a guy in the room next to mine was gay and asked when I knew I was gay, but I denied it. He laughed and said "oh okay then."

    Up to this point, I think you just paraphrased how Jack helped Will come out.

    Which means your life reflects a sitcom. Huh.

    Jimothy on
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    I'd Fuck Chuck Lidell UpI'd Fuck Chuck Lidell Up Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    I'm tired of getting near-mauled by gays and like 1 girl in my entire life

    apparently the girl was completely slutty too, which i only found out when she kept dropping hints about sex in a school basement when 2 of my friends were there.

    it was like "so a lot of kids come down here to have sex behind these pillars"

    "uuh, well I'm surprised the teachers don't find them"

    "well it's an older part of the school, no one comes down here unless it's to have sex."

    *looks over at friends who apparently haven't heard*

    "well uuh, i guess we'd better go then" *books it upstairs*

    don't get me wrong, i appreciate the enthusiasm, but man. like, right there, in the middle of a school where 8-9 other schools were gathered.

    I'd Fuck Chuck Lidell Up on
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    RainOPainRainOPain Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    This thread needs more stories from LeXoAnvil

    That dude was awesome

    RainOPain on
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    KadithKadith Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    commie wrote: »
    I'm tired of getting near-mauled by gays and like 1 girl in my entire life

    apparently the girl was completely slutty too, which i only found out when she kept dropping hints about sex in a school basement when 2 of my friends were there.

    it was like "so a lot of kids come down here to have sex behind these pillars"

    "uuh, well I'm surprised the teachers don't find them"

    "well it's an older part of the school, no one comes down here unless it's to have sex."

    *looks over at friends who apparently haven't heard*

    "well uuh, i guess we'd better go then" *books it upstairs*

    don't get me wrong, i appreciate the enthusiasm, but man. like, right there, in the middle of a school where 8-9 other schools were gathered.
    you pussy

    Kadith on
    zkHcp.jpg
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    nevilleneville The Worst Gay (Seriously. The Worst!)Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Jimothy wrote: »
    neville wrote: »
    I don't think it was one thing, I questioned in high school but was seriously repressed. And in college a guy in the room next to mine was gay and asked when I knew I was gay, but I denied it. He laughed and said "oh okay then."

    Up to this point, I think you just paraphrased how Jack helped Will come out.

    Which means your life reflects a sitcom. Huh.

    Man, Will is such a boring character too.
    I don't want to be him. =(

    neville on
    nevillexmassig1.png
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    tuggatugga Makin' movies Makin' songsRegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    tugga wrote: »
    but youre from guthrie

    theres not much to choose from

    No. theres nothing to choose from. i date girls from edmond. Guthrie girls all have STD's. like. no shit. a recent study showed that 79 percent of guthrie teen girls have an STD or are pregnant. i was like. AMAZING!

    a study?

    i thought that was like a given

    like 5,280 ft = 1 mile

    Guthrie girls = dirty, loose whores

    tugga on
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    mcpmcp Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    was she hinting for a 4-some?

    mcp on
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    Skull ManSkull Man RIP KUSU Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    no sluts

    that's how dudes be gettin sick

    that's how dicks be gettin drips

    Skull Man on
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    KadithKadith Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    but it's okay to slap them on the ass

    Kadith on
    zkHcp.jpg
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    I'd Fuck Chuck Lidell UpI'd Fuck Chuck Lidell Up Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    mcp wrote: »
    was she hinting for a 4-some?

    you know what, I'm still not quite sure.

    I think it was just me though, cause she offered for only me to follow her down there and my other friends were like "hey we'll come too, i wanna take a look around the rest of the school". and she was 1/2 whispering the things to me.

    in retrospect my friends are notorious for accidental blockage.

    edit: i can recall at least 4 times

    I'd Fuck Chuck Lidell Up on
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    space_satanspace_satan __BANNED USERS regular
    edited August 2007
    tugga wrote: »
    tugga wrote: »
    but youre from guthrie

    theres not much to choose from

    No. theres nothing to choose from. i date girls from edmond. Guthrie girls all have STD's. like. no shit. a recent study showed that 79 percent of guthrie teen girls have an STD or are pregnant. i was like. AMAZING!

    a study?

    i thought that was like a given

    like 5,280 ft = 1 mile

    Guthrie girls = dirty, loose whores

    No truer words have ever been said. i just recently left a girl because she boned 4 dudes at the same time while i was out of town camping.

    space_satan on
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    Skull ManSkull Man RIP KUSU Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Kadith wrote: »
    but it's okay to slap them on the ass

    yeah

    what's the big deal?

    Skull Man on
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    KadithKadith Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Too bad it couldn't have been 5 m i rite?

    Kadith on
    zkHcp.jpg
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    mcpmcp Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    commie wrote: »
    mcp wrote: »
    was she hinting for a 4-some?

    you know what, I'm still not quite sure.

    I think it was just me though, cause she offered for only me to follow her down there and my other friends were like "hey we'll come too, i wanna take a look around the rest of the school". and she was 1/2 whispering the things to me.

    in retrospect my friends are notorious for accidental blockage.

    edit: i can recall at least 4 times
    If I was down there with my friends, I would have told them to fuck off.

    They would have understood.

    mcp on
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    mcpmcp Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    and why does that make her completely slutty?

    did she sleep around with tons of dudes?

    or are you equating adventurous sex or a high sex drive with being a slut?

    mcp on
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    I'd Fuck Chuck Lidell UpI'd Fuck Chuck Lidell Up Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    mcp wrote: »
    commie wrote: »
    mcp wrote: »
    was she hinting for a 4-some?

    you know what, I'm still not quite sure.

    I think it was just me though, cause she offered for only me to follow her down there and my other friends were like "hey we'll come too, i wanna take a look around the rest of the school". and she was 1/2 whispering the things to me.

    in retrospect my friends are notorious for accidental blockage.

    edit: i can recall at least 4 times
    If I was down there with my friends, I would have told them to fuck off.

    They would have understood.

    it was utah

    most of my friends were mormon, which isn't bad, but these 2 were like Captain and Colonel mormon.

    telling them to leave while a girl is in the room is like saying "guys get the hell out of my house there is a rock sitting on my table"

    i don't think they would have understood unless i had actually told them "guys go back upstairs i'm pretty sure this girl wants to have sex right here in the basement" and then i would have just gotten bad looks and probably a lecture.

    so basically, yes I'm a sissy

    edit: and no, when i got back upstairs my friend asked why she brought me down there without her. when i replied with "uuh..." i guess it was some kind of sign that she had been right because she told me that she had slept with, like, all the boys. and apparently while i was talking to everyone in her circle of friends she had passed a cell phone back and forth like a note to her. I'll spare the details.

    I'd Fuck Chuck Lidell Up on
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    potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    "jesus my ass is sweaty right now"

    wasn't even that embarassing

    potatoe on
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    DegjoDegjo Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Oh, the months-long debacle over
    :) "Am I hot?"
    :mrgreen: "You're very cute."
    :| "So you're saying I'm not hot?"
    :mrgreen: "Well I like cute better than hot. You're more cute."
    :( "What's the difference? What makes me cute but not hot?"
    :mrgreen: "Well hot is like sexy and sensual. Cute is more happy and cuddly."
    :cry: "You don't think I'm sexy..."

    Oh God, why didn't I learn that you're supposed to just lie to women?

    see shibby

    we told you you're retarded
    That's not me

    Degjo on
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    DegjoDegjo Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    I'm actually a little offended. I'm much more retarded than that when it comes to females.

    Degjo on
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    AggroChanAggroChan __BANNED USERS regular
    edited August 2007
    "You want my cunt on your face? What?"
    "Ohhhhh. You want me to cum on your face."

    AggroChan on
    PSN + Zune :>
    Sillender.jpgSillender.png
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    DegjoDegjo Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    I'll lick your asshole if you swallow my jizz.

    Degjo on
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    potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    okay, so i saw this guy walking between classes
    he had dark brown hair, with orange highlights
    had a dark-red shoulder bag
    he looked like a pretty normal guy

    then i saw him run and leap over a little concrete structure to avoid a crowd in his way
    which wasn't too out of the ordinary

    but then i saw his tail
    the fucker was wearing a raccoon tail
    just a 2-foot tail hanging out from below his shirt

    potatoe on
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    TankHammerTankHammer Atlanta Ghostbuster Atlanta, GARegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    potatoe wrote: »
    okay, so i saw this guy walking between classes
    he had dark brown hair, with orange highlights
    had a dark-red shoulder bag
    he looked like a pretty normal guy

    then i saw him run and leap over a little concrete structure to avoid a crowd in his way
    which wasn't too out of the ordinary

    but then i saw his tail
    the fucker was wearing a raccoon tail
    just a 2-foot tail hanging out from below his shirt

    Did you say something embarrassing to him?

    TankHammer on
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    potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    can i put it in your ass?

    potatoe on
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    I'd Fuck Chuck Lidell UpI'd Fuck Chuck Lidell Up Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    potatoe wrote: »
    okay, so i saw this guy walking between classes
    he had dark brown hair, with orange highlights
    had a dark-red shoulder bag
    he looked like a pretty normal guy

    then i saw him run and leap over a little concrete structure to avoid a crowd in his way
    which wasn't too out of the ordinary

    but then i saw his tail
    the fucker was wearing a raccoon tail
    just a 2-foot tail hanging out from below his shirt

    apparently not all of these people are furries

    i guess it was a huge fad in japan at one point (i blame ayumi hamasaki) and is now a huge fad for weeaboos.

    i will however say that there were 2 or 3 people who wore those when i used to play magic.

    boy was i ashamed

    I'd Fuck Chuck Lidell Up on
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    potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    if any of my friends wore a goddamn tail, i'd hit them

    now, i'm not a violent person, but i'd have to hit them

    potatoe on
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    Ol' SparkyOl' Sparky Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    "hey you remember kriss kross? MY PANTS ARE BACKWARDS AND I LOVE YOU"

    i didn't really love her

    and i was very drunk

    Ol' Sparky on
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    TankHammerTankHammer Atlanta Ghostbuster Atlanta, GARegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    The mormon basement story reminds me of a similar situation I was in in... I want to say freshman year of high school. Could have been sophomore.

    Either way there was this girl in the drama club I was in (it was fun. shut up!). I had previously thought this girl was cute but it was hearing her talk that made me decide to just be happy looking at her. Mother nature had been generous to her this year in the hormone department, it seemed, as she was sporting a very impressive rack for her or any age.
    I heard this girl talk about things I'd never have thought anyone talked about openly (I lived a fairly sheltered life) including her sexual status (virgin but interested), her masturbation habits ("I've never tried a foreign object!!!" blurted from the back of the room followed by asking about carrots and bananas and what if they broke off inside) and boys she'd fuck if they asked nicely.
    She was also quite ditzy, which is a turn-off to me, not that it didn't prevent my imagination from formulating elaborate sexual fantasies.

    So during a dress rehearsal, she's standing next to me and whispers that she thinks I'm hot and if I like her. I notice, not for the first time that evening, that she's not wearing a bra under her tight, black sweater. I rasp back to her that I didn't want to have that conversation then and there but would talk to her later.
    So when I got the chance I told her that she was very pretty and that physically I was attracted to her but she needed to quit saying dumb things. It didn't really seem to hurt her feelings but when I didn't pursue her afterwards she moved on and I didn't hear word 2 on it after the fact.

    I bet she's a HUGE slut right now, and I'm not exactly regretting getting in on the ground floor of that, but you always have to wonder...

    TankHammer on
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    potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    ground floor is the best floor

    better than in the windy attic

    potatoe on
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    JimothyJimothy Not in front of the fox he's with the owlRegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    potatoe wrote: »
    if any of my friends wore a goddamn tail, i'd hit them

    now, i'm not a violent person, but i'd have to hit them

    I read this differently.

    I thought you were implying that tails turn you on or something.

    Jimothy on
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    potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    who says i wasn't?

    rowr

    potatoe on
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    tuggatugga Makin' movies Makin' songsRegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    tugga wrote: »
    tugga wrote: »
    but youre from guthrie

    theres not much to choose from

    No. theres nothing to choose from. i date girls from edmond. Guthrie girls all have STD's. like. no shit. a recent study showed that 79 percent of guthrie teen girls have an STD or are pregnant. i was like. AMAZING!

    a study?

    i thought that was like a given

    like 5,280 ft = 1 mile

    Guthrie girls = dirty, loose whores

    No truer words have ever been said. i just recently left a girl because she boned 4 dudes at the same time while i was out of town camping.

    i remember that

    she was pretty loose

    tugga on
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    TankHammerTankHammer Atlanta Ghostbuster Atlanta, GARegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    tugga wrote: »
    tugga wrote: »
    tugga wrote: »
    but youre from guthrie

    theres not much to choose from

    No. theres nothing to choose from. i date girls from edmond. Guthrie girls all have STD's. like. no shit. a recent study showed that 79 percent of guthrie teen girls have an STD or are pregnant. i was like. AMAZING!

    a study?

    i thought that was like a given

    like 5,280 ft = 1 mile

    Guthrie girls = dirty, loose whores

    No truer words have ever been said. i just recently left a girl because she boned 4 dudes at the same time while i was out of town camping.

    i remember that

    she was pretty loose

    Sorry, that was my fault. I think she might still have my watch in there somewhere. If you find it let me know.

    My grandparents gave that to me.

    TankHammer on
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