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Facts About Montana

245

Posts

  • lordthandalordthanda Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Comment at dusk: Man, even the sun wants to get the hell out of Montana.

    Comment over an hour later while it's STILL dusk:
    Montana is so big it's gravitational pull keeps the sun aligned.

    lordthanda on
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  • AngelHedgieAngelHedgie Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Well, here's one that is both funny AND true - Montana is the 4th largest state sizewise, but populationwise, we're pretty damn low on the list. Also, one of the bigger industries here is cattle.

    This sets us up for the situation that there's more cattle than people here. God help us if there's ever a bovine revolt.

    AngelHedgie on
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  • UndefinedMonkeyUndefinedMonkey Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    _______moe wrote: »
    Oh man, Butte was the literal butt of sooooo many jokes. The best was when we were sitting down at the Flying J's and a few people were eating. One of the Knight Rider guys was talking and the state troopers walked in. Another guy looks at him and says, "you'd better be careful, the Butt Police are here."

    You ate at the Flying J and lived to tell the tale? I'm in awe. On a related note, Butte is noteworthy for kicking a chapter of the Hell's Angels out of town. Like... they loaded all their bikes up into a mine truck and dumped them on the highway outside of town. It's less of a town and more of a gigantic gang.

    Also, every fact in this thread is true. Especially the part about getting a B.Sc. in Holes.

    UndefinedMonkey on
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  • Moe FwackyMoe Fwacky Right Here, Right Now Drives a BuickModerator mod
    edited September 2007
    Well I didn't eat there. However, I believe three people threw up from that stuff. It was Ew-tastic.

    Moe Fwacky on
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  • UndefinedMonkeyUndefinedMonkey Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Yeah, Butte food isn't enjoyed so much as it is endured (I lived there for 4 years.) Well, there are a few noteworthy exceptions. Mostly, it's pretty awful. Also, they have the toxic death pit and Silent Hill-style air raid sirens that they activate nightly.

    UndefinedMonkey on
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  • B:LB:L I've done worse. Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    This sets us up for the situation that there's more cattle than people here. God help us if there's ever a bovine revolt.

    We will fight for bovine freedom
    We will hold our large heads high
    We will run free with the buffalo
    Or die

    Cows With Guns

    B:L on
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  • Moe FwackyMoe Fwacky Right Here, Right Now Drives a BuickModerator mod
    edited September 2007
    Yeah, Butte food isn't enjoyed so much as it is endured (I lived there for 4 years.) Well, there are a few noteworthy exceptions. Mostly, it's pretty awful. Also, they have the toxic death pit and Silent Hill-style air raid sirens that they activate nightly.

    Yeah, now I'm really glad I didn't eat there. I tried to warn people, you never go Butte to mouth.

    Moe Fwacky on
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  • AngelHedgieAngelHedgie Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Also, every fact in this thread is true. Especially the part about getting a B.Sc. in Holes.

    Two Words: Montana Tech.

    AngelHedgie on
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  • UndefinedMonkeyUndefinedMonkey Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Also, every fact in this thread is true. Especially the part about getting a B.Sc. in Holes.

    Two Words: Montana Tech.

    Yep... exactly what I had in mind. Although to be fair they're pretty good at teaching people to dig / drill / explode holes. Their engineering dept (where I graduated) is pretty decent, too.

    UndefinedMonkey on
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  • AngelHedgieAngelHedgie Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Yeah, Butte food isn't enjoyed so much as it is endured (I lived there for 4 years.) Well, there are a few noteworthy exceptions. Mostly, it's pretty awful. Also, they have the toxic death pit and Silent Hill-style air raid sirens that they activate nightly.

    But it does have Kerouac's favorite 24 hour bar.

    AngelHedgie on
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  • UndefinedMonkeyUndefinedMonkey Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Yeah, Butte food isn't enjoyed so much as it is endured (I lived there for 4 years.) Well, there are a few noteworthy exceptions. Mostly, it's pretty awful. Also, they have the toxic death pit and Silent Hill-style air raid sirens that they activate nightly.

    But it does have Kerouac's favorite 24 hour bar.

    I hadn't heard about this. Is it the M&M?

    UndefinedMonkey on
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  • AngelHedgieAngelHedgie Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Yeah, Butte food isn't enjoyed so much as it is endured (I lived there for 4 years.) Well, there are a few noteworthy exceptions. Mostly, it's pretty awful. Also, they have the toxic death pit and Silent Hill-style air raid sirens that they activate nightly.

    But it does have Kerouac's favorite 24 hour bar.

    I hadn't heard about this. Is it the M&M?

    Yup.

    AngelHedgie on
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  • UndefinedMonkeyUndefinedMonkey Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    That figures... it seems to be everyone's favorite. I heard they closed down shortly after I left, although I've heard rumors that they reopened.

    UndefinedMonkey on
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  • AngelHedgieAngelHedgie Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    That figures... it seems to be everyone's favorite. I heard they closed down shortly after I left, although I've heard rumors that they reopened.

    Yep...the governor even did the reopening.

    Speaking of governors...we had one that set feminism back 50 years. By being governor.

    AngelHedgie on
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  • Eastern GlowEastern Glow Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    In Montana it is legal to shoot Indians, as long as you have the required papers and documentations.

    Eastern Glow on
  • Moe FwackyMoe Fwacky Right Here, Right Now Drives a BuickModerator mod
    edited September 2007
    How does one go about acquiring said documentation?

    Moe Fwacky on
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  • UndefinedMonkeyUndefinedMonkey Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    _______moe wrote: »
    How does one go about acquiring said documentation?

    If you don't know how, you're not the kind of person they want shooting people.

    UndefinedMonkey on
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  • AngelHedgieAngelHedgie Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    In Montana it is legal to shoot Indians, as long as you have the required papers and documentations.

    To be honest, this isn't really funny when you look at the issues that the First Nations deal with here already.

    AngelHedgie on
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  • HounHoun Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    In Montana it is legal to shoot Indians, as long as you have the required papers and documentations.

    To be honest, this isn't really funny when you look at the issues that the First Nations deal with here already.

    Sure it is. We're laughing at how a backwards-thinking law can still stand on the books. You and I both know that if anyone EVER tried to cite this law as justification for homicide, they'd be laughed at all the way to their shiny new cell, and the law would get removed ASAP. ;-)

    No one's condoning murder, so don't try to spin it that way. :P

    Houn on
  • AngelHedgieAngelHedgie Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Houn wrote: »
    In Montana it is legal to shoot Indians, as long as you have the required papers and documentations.

    To be honest, this isn't really funny when you look at the issues that the First Nations deal with here already.

    Sure it is. We're laughing at how a backwards-thinking law can still stand on the books. You and I both know that if anyone EVER tried to cite this law as justification for homicide, they'd be laughed at all the way to their shiny new cell, and the law would get removed ASAP. ;-)

    No one's condoning murder, so don't try to spin it that way. :P

    And I wasn't. The point I was making is that there's a lot of tension between the First Nation tribes here and the other citizens of Montana. It's not pretty. So while I can see why you find humor in that, I don't because of the situation here.

    AngelHedgie on
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  • HounHoun Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Houn wrote: »
    In Montana it is legal to shoot Indians, as long as you have the required papers and documentations.

    To be honest, this isn't really funny when you look at the issues that the First Nations deal with here already.

    Sure it is. We're laughing at how a backwards-thinking law can still stand on the books. You and I both know that if anyone EVER tried to cite this law as justification for homicide, they'd be laughed at all the way to their shiny new cell, and the law would get removed ASAP. ;-)

    No one's condoning murder, so don't try to spin it that way. :P

    And I wasn't. The point I was making is that there's a lot of tension between the First Nation tribes here and the other citizens of Montana. It's not pretty. So while I can see why you find humor in that, I don't because of the situation here.

    The First Nation tribes need to recognize that while their ancestors got a bum deal, all cultures are subject to change through both internal and external influences, and move on. The rest of the citizens of Montana need to recognize that if they bear any negative will towards the First Nation tribes, they need to kill themselves because they're likely backwater hicks who will never contribute in any meaningful way to society as a whole.

    Problem solved. Can it be making Montana jokes tiem now plz? ;-)

    Houn on
  • UndefinedMonkeyUndefinedMonkey Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    The amount of beef in Montana must always remain constant. Thus, no beef may be created or destroyed, although it may change forms.

    UndefinedMonkey on
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  • randomguyrandomguy Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Jack Kerouac thought he deserved to die in Montana and in 1987 he was buried there alive.

    randomguy on
    "i ate your babies princess."
  • lordthandalordthanda Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Gary Coleman tried to find work in Montana, but the residents chased him out.

    lordthanda on
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  • Qs23Qs23 Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    The US Interstate Highway first ran through Montana back in 1957. It's only purpose was to help people go from ND to ID while touching as little amount of Montana as possible. When Montana tests the first section of the US Interstate Flyway in 2020, the floating reststops (manned by non-montanans) will make it completely safe to traverse the state with out worrying about ailments caused by proximity to the state.

    Qs23 on
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  • lordthandalordthanda Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Montana's airspace is not actually under anyones jurisdiction, as Montanans do not believe Air Travel is possible

    lordthanda on
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  • UndefinedMonkeyUndefinedMonkey Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Qs23 wrote: »
    The US Interstate Highway first ran through Montana back in 1957. It's only purpose was to help people go from MN to ID while touching as little of Montana and North Dakota as possible.

    Fixed.

    The word "straight" is not used in Montana due to the fact that it makes all other directions seem homosexual in comparison.

    UndefinedMonkey on
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  • AngelHedgieAngelHedgie Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    The only reason North Dakota exists is to make Montana look good.

    AngelHedgie on
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  • Moe FwackyMoe Fwacky Right Here, Right Now Drives a BuickModerator mod
    edited September 2007
    It's not doing a very good job. :P

    Moe Fwacky on
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  • AngelHedgieAngelHedgie Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Then you've never been in ND.

    AngelHedgie on
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  • JiraffeJiraffe Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    As a native of Montana I take offense at this. You people forgot the best one!

    -In Montana email is delivered by stage coach.

    Jiraffe on
  • UndefinedMonkeyUndefinedMonkey Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    ...and our stagecoaches travel by mail (which scares the horses to no end.)

    UndefinedMonkey on
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  • Moe FwackyMoe Fwacky Right Here, Right Now Drives a BuickModerator mod
    edited September 2007
    Well North Dakota has an awesome liquor store (Happy Harry's Bottle Shop) and a Jimmy John's that opened an hour early to accommodate our schedule. All Montana had was a McDonalds with a staff that had never seen a crowd as big as ours.

    Also :^: to the stagecoach bits.

    Moe Fwacky on
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  • AngelHedgieAngelHedgie Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    The only thing between Montana and the Arctic Circle is Canada, which is not known for having high R-values. Thus, it is cold in Montana.

    AngelHedgie on
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  • lordthandalordthanda Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Montana is the only state that has outlawed the use of credit cards. This was primarily done to make Montanans feel better at the fact that no credit card company would offer service to people in Montana

    lordthanda on
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  • Qs23Qs23 Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Montana is one of the only states to still offer 85.5 grade gasoline. The reason is that when mixed with moonshine, it adds a nice "nutty" taste.

    Qs23 on
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  • yoshamanoyoshamano The fuck is this. The fuck was that. Marshall, Soviet MichiganRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    In Soviet Montana, coal mines you.

    yoshamano on
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  • UndefinedMonkeyUndefinedMonkey Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    A herd of antelope was once elected to public office in Montana.

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  • HounHoun Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    A herd of antelope was once elected to public office in Montana.

    Unfortunately, they didn't manage to institute many policy changes prior to the opening of Hunting Season and their sudden (yet legal) demise, leaving Montana without a full governing body until the following Election.

    Houn on
  • randomguyrandomguy Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Houn wrote: »
    A herd of antelope was once elected to public office in Montana.

    Unfortunately, they didn't manage to institute many policy changes prior to the opening of Hunting Season and their sudden (yet legal) demise, leaving Montana without a full governing body until the following Election.

    This event created the fabled Montana lottery election where each winner is allowed to stone his predecessor to death before taking office.

    randomguy on
    "i ate your babies princess."
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