Need advice on how to make a kid stop being so bad

2

Posts

  • XaquinXaquin Right behind you!Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Tav wrote: »
    Does the kid get much attention? Does he spend much time with his parents, or better yet, does he spend much fun time with his parents? Maybe all this acting out is a way for him get get them to spend time with them, because if you spray a baby in the face with carpet cleaner you're guaranteed to get attention from the grown-ups. Maybe if they did something together, like watching a movie as a family, or going cycling in the park he'd be getting positive attention, rather then just getting shouted at.

    Attention is not an issue either, he does plenty of fun stuff with his family. He comes over my place a lot and we play around and have fun but the kid does NOT SIT STILL. The only thing that we have EVER gotten to occupy him is my brother's DS. He'll sit there and play mario kart DS for like 4 hours but we can't get him to sit down and watch TV for more than 15 minutes.

    No 4 year old will EVER sit still FYI. Thats perfectly normal.

    Xaquin on
  • DjiemDjiem Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Tav wrote: »
    Does the kid get much attention? Does he spend much time with his parents, or better yet, does he spend much fun time with his parents? Maybe all this acting out is a way for him get get them to spend time with them, because if you spray a baby in the face with carpet cleaner you're guaranteed to get attention from the grown-ups. Maybe if they did something together, like watching a movie as a family, or going cycling in the park he'd be getting positive attention, rather then just getting shouted at.

    Attention is not an issue either, he does plenty of fun stuff with his family. He comes over my place a lot and we play around and have fun but the kid does NOT SIT STILL. The only thing that we have EVER gotten to occupy him is my brother's DS. He'll sit there and play mario kart DS for like 4 hours but we can't get him to sit down and watch TV for more than 15 minutes.

    Maybe they should find some physical activity he enjoys, perhaps a sport, and have him try that? Maybe he's just got a LOT of energy to spend.

    Djiem on
  • IreneDAdlerIreneDAdler Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Tav wrote: »
    Does the kid get much attention? Does he spend much time with his parents, or better yet, does he spend much fun time with his parents? Maybe all this acting out is a way for him get get them to spend time with them, because if you spray a baby in the face with carpet cleaner you're guaranteed to get attention from the grown-ups. Maybe if they did something together, like watching a movie as a family, or going cycling in the park he'd be getting positive attention, rather then just getting shouted at.

    Attention is not an issue either, he does plenty of fun stuff with his family.

    But how much time does he spend with his father specifically? If what you say about him only acting up when his father is not physically present is accurate, then I wouldn't rule out attention-seeking just yet. Has the father's schedule changed in the last couple years? Did he get a new job that doesn't allow him to spend as much time with the kid as he used to?

    IreneDAdler on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • mastmanmastman Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    these other civilized ways are what I'd try first too, but if it comes down to it, you know. My first post was what I truly meant, the rest of them was just me being a superflous ass

    mastman on
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  • RuckusRuckus Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Punishment via spanking is totally cool as long as the kid knows he's getting spanked for misbehaving, not because dad's angry.

    Ruckus on
    Raneados wrote: »
    so what SPECIFICALLY is the problem with my hole?
  • RocketSauceRocketSauce Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Tav wrote: »
    Does the kid get much attention? Does he spend much time with his parents, or better yet, does he spend much fun time with his parents? Maybe all this acting out is a way for him get get them to spend time with them, because if you spray a baby in the face with carpet cleaner you're guaranteed to get attention from the grown-ups. Maybe if they did something together, like watching a movie as a family, or going cycling in the park he'd be getting positive attention, rather then just getting shouted at.

    Attention is not an issue either, he does plenty of fun stuff with his family. He comes over my place a lot and we play around and have fun but the kid does NOT SIT STILL. The only thing that we have EVER gotten to occupy him is my brother's DS. He'll sit there and play mario kart DS for like 4 hours but we can't get him to sit down and watch TV for more than 15 minutes.


    He might have ADHD (I'm not qualified to make a diagnosis), which would mean he probably has trouble processing these naughty things he's doing. He might not even understand WHY these things are inappropriate, if he can't focus. No spanking, beating, verbally abusing your child. Ever. It seriously damages their self esteem and will cause resentment towards the parent. Take him to the professionals.

    RocketSauce on
  • SentrySentry Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Tav wrote: »
    Does the kid get much attention? Does he spend much time with his parents, or better yet, does he spend much fun time with his parents? Maybe all this acting out is a way for him get get them to spend time with them, because if you spray a baby in the face with carpet cleaner you're guaranteed to get attention from the grown-ups. Maybe if they did something together, like watching a movie as a family, or going cycling in the park he'd be getting positive attention, rather then just getting shouted at.

    Attention is not an issue either, he does plenty of fun stuff with his family. He comes over my place a lot and we play around and have fun but the kid does NOT SIT STILL. The only thing that we have EVER gotten to occupy him is my brother's DS. He'll sit there and play mario kart DS for like 4 hours but we can't get him to sit down and watch TV for more than 15 minutes.


    He might have ADHD (I'm not qualified to make a diagnosis), which would mean he probably has trouble processing these naughty things he's doing. He might not even understand WHY these things are inappropriate, if he can't focus. No spanking, beating, verbally abusing your child. Ever. It seriously damages their self esteem and will cause resentment towards the parent. Take him to the professionals.

    He could have a great deal of issues... frankly, the OP doesn't sound like normal behavior for a child of four. Kids who act out usually do so because they don't know another way to communicate what they are feeling... a four year old should have other avenues besides hitting at this point. He could be mildly autistic, developmentally disabled, or he could just be a really angry four year old.

    This why a professional should proceed wailing on him with a putter...

    Sentry on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    wrote:
    When I was a little kid, I always pretended I was the hero,' Skip said.
    'Fuck yeah, me too. What little kid ever pretended to be part of the lynch-mob?'
  • IncenjucarIncenjucar Not a Fictional Character Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Spanking is, frankly, a terribly dangerous route to go, as are physical threats.

    I used to have -dreams- about murdering my dad, and any time I had to speak up for myself around him I had to make a mental note of "how do I kill him if he doesn't take this well and he attacks me" and he was mostly just intimidating.

    It's a sick, sad way to associate with family. Especially if you happen to be wrong. Because, remember, chances are a parent WILL punish a child when it isn't deserved at least once. Being smacked in the ass for something you didn't do won't be healthy for your psychology.

    Violence, even -implied- violence, should be avoided as much as humanly possible.

    Incenjucar on
  • XaquinXaquin Right behind you!Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Sentry wrote: »
    This why a professional should proceed wailing on him with a putter...

    good thing no one suggested that =/

    but yes, definatly look to a professional or at least ask friends and family .... grandparents would probably be able to help a lot in the advice department.

    Xaquin on
  • IncenjucarIncenjucar Not a Fictional Character Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    I'd say go for the professional before grandparents, frankly.

    My grandparents on my dad's side used to leave my dad's ass looking like a zebra just for irritating them.

    He's never gotten over how much they fucked his brain up.

    Older generations do not automatically have better practices.

    Incenjucar on
  • XaquinXaquin Right behind you!Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Incenjucar wrote: »
    I'd say go for the professional before grandparents, frankly.

    My grandparents on my dad's side used to leave my dad's ass looking like a zebra just for irritating them.

    He's never gotten over how much they fucked his brain up.

    Older generations do not automatically have better practices.

    well I mean if they're good grandparents go to them for advice.

    Xaquin on
  • SentrySentry Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Xaquin wrote: »
    Sentry wrote: »
    This why a professional should proceed wailing on him with a putter...

    good thing no one suggested that =/

    but yes, definatly look to a professional or at least ask friends and family .... grandparents would probably be able to help a lot in the advice department.

    For a four year old, violence is violence. Yes, a child may be spanked and turn out fine... but there are very few child professionals who view that as a good solution to a problem.

    It always amuses me how many people stick up for spanking... I wonder why that is...

    Sentry on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    wrote:
    When I was a little kid, I always pretended I was the hero,' Skip said.
    'Fuck yeah, me too. What little kid ever pretended to be part of the lynch-mob?'
  • XaquinXaquin Right behind you!Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Sentry wrote: »
    Xaquin wrote: »
    Sentry wrote: »
    This why a professional should proceed wailing on him with a putter...

    good thing no one suggested that =/

    but yes, definatly look to a professional or at least ask friends and family .... grandparents would probably be able to help a lot in the advice department.

    For a four year old, violence is violence. Yes, a child may be spanked and turn out fine... but there are very few child professionals who view that as a good solution to a problem.

    It always amuses me how many people stick up for spanking... I wonder why that is...

    don't keep us all in the dark.

    don't rule it out is all I'm saying. It's not the worst thing in the world. I'm not advocating some weird super beating or anything. Little kids don't always understand verbal commands and even if they do, they don't always listen. Everyone understands a small spanking. It's a small sharp notice that you need to stop doing what you're doing asap.

    Xaquin on
  • brandotheninjamasterbrandotheninjamaster Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    I know that spanking is not the topic of discussion here but, I think when a child is spanked the child associates pain (emotional pain) to doing something bad. Kinda like Pavlov and his dog. (bell = food) (bad = pain). To me it works on the most basic of levels.

    brandotheninjamaster on
  • SamSam Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    it's a little more personal than the pavlovian dog, i'd say.

    but damn, this kid sounds like a fucking asshole.

    Sam on
  • Bliss 101Bliss 101 Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    I know that spanking is not the topic of discussion here but, I think when a child is spanked the child associates pain (emotional pain) to doing something bad. Kinda like Pavlov and his dog. (bell = food) (bad = pain). To me it works on the most basic of levels.

    Man you can't turn an aggressive dog into a friendly family dog by beating it!

    Jesus, people. Four year old kids do understand verbal commands. I could read when I was four. It's not like they're too stupid to understand anything but violence.

    Bliss 101 on
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  • IncenjucarIncenjucar Not a Fictional Character Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    :|

    The long and the short of the psychology as I've been introduced to it:

    Pain/Pleasure-based teaching: You can escape pain and gain pleasure by being sneaky.

    Guilt/Empathy-based teaching: You can't escape guilt and having learned to care about others unless you're an outright sociopath.

    Scary parents just taught me to be a cookie-ninja and a master liar.

    Incenjucar on
  • SentrySentry Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    I know that spanking is not the topic of discussion here but, I think when a child is spanked the child associates pain (emotional pain) to doing something bad. Kinda like Pavlov and his dog. (bell = food) (bad = pain). To me it works on the most basic of levels.

    Yeah... because there's no other association a child could make when it comes to being hit...
    Wikipedia wrote:
    The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) official policy statement [5] states that "Corporal punishment is of limited effectiveness and has potentially deleterious side effects. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that parents be encouraged and assisted in the development of methods other than spanking for managing undesired behavior." The AAP states that any corporal punishment methods other than open-hand spanking on the buttocks or extremities "are unacceptable" and "should never be used". Furthermore, they state that "The more children are spanked, the more anger they report as adults, the more likely they are to spank their own children, the more likely they are to approve of hitting a spouse, and the more marital conflict they experience as adults [16] Spanking has been associated with higher rates of physical aggression, more substance abuse, and increased risk of crime and violence when used with older children and adolescents.[17]"

    The American Psychological Association opposes the use of corporal punishment in schools, juvenile facilities, child care nurseries, and all other institutions, public or private, where children are cared for or educated (Conger, 1975). They state that corporal punishment is violent, unnecessary, may lower self-esteem, is likely to train children to use physical violence, and is liable to instill hostility and rage without reducing the undesired behavior. [18]

    Sentry on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    wrote:
    When I was a little kid, I always pretended I was the hero,' Skip said.
    'Fuck yeah, me too. What little kid ever pretended to be part of the lynch-mob?'
  • TaximesTaximes Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    My girlfriend's college ASL professor was a deaf guy raising four hearing children (I believe his wife was deaf too, but I'm not sure), and he told the class the most awesome parenting story I've ever heard.

    When they were all shopping in a store, the kids were throwing tantrums, screaming and crying because they wanted this and that. The only reason his deafness is relevant is that it's a different kind of situation for him, not being able to hear them himself but knowing they were bothering the other customers. Anyway, he told them to stop several times, but they wouldn't.

    So, he stops. He lays down on the ground, and he starts whining and crying and flailing around. The kids stare in disbelief (along with everyone else in the store), then start begging him to stop.

    They behaved extremely well for a long time afterwards.

    (I'm seconding the "kids can be embarrassed too" sentiment from the first page, but showing that it doesn't have to be done with spanking :P)

    Taximes on
  • IncenjucarIncenjucar Not a Fictional Character Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Other things to avoid:

    Any kind of award-based model. A child who associates behavior with gain will change the behavior as soon as they find a different way to gain, or when they lose interest in what is to be gained. It's how you get corrupt assholes.

    Negotiating. If the child thinks they can make their own terms, you'll end up bartering authority all day long. It's good to teach a child how to negotiate with minor things, so they can develop those skills, but when it comes to "don't hit your sister" you don't talk terms any more than the cops do when they pull you over for a hit and run.

    A focus on punishment. Obviously, if the kid is kind of a jerk to begin with, you'll have to do some kind of punishment. But, ideally, the focus needs to be on WHY you shouldn't do something, not WHAT happens when you get -caught-. Empathy is a rare, but insanely useful thing to teach a child. Pets are a great way to introduce them to it. You have to do a lot of talking and a lot of demonstration, but if you do it right you can get the child do have actual morals and ethics, rather than just a fear of authority figures catching them being jerks.

    --

    Thumbs up to the deaf guy: That's a pretty awesome way to enforce some empathy. Just so long as you're not -antagonistic- about it though. If you're too mocking about it it'll be taken as an insult instead of a lesson. Insulting kids is a baaaaaad idea.

    Incenjucar on
  • brandotheninjamasterbrandotheninjamaster Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Alright then, spanking aside how would you deal with a kid that acts out like that? Judging from the OP the father is not some kind of tyrant who sole purpose in life is to inflict pain on his son. He just sounds like hes out of options. What would be a suitable punishment for spraying a 1 yr baby in the eyes with carpet cleaner?
    time out? saying no? in a calm voice say "that was bad...please don't do that again..."?

    brandotheninjamaster on
  • IncenjucarIncenjucar Not a Fictional Character Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    I would go with a deep discussion on what could have happened, maybe followed by "I would like you to put on this blindfold for an hour so you can get a small idea of what you could have done to the baby."

    Ask questions like "Do you know why that was wrong? How does it make you feel? How would it make -you- feel? Why did you do it?" Etc etc etc.

    Questions are very good. Pure lecturing will just make a kid zone out.

    Honestly, most violent parental behavior is due to impatience and lack of energy.

    Incenjucar on
  • SentrySentry Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Alright then, spanking aside how would you deal with a kid that acts out like that? Judging from the OP the father is not some kind of tyrant who sole purpose in life is to inflict pain on his son. He just sounds like hes out of options. What would be a suitable punishment for spraying a 1 yr baby in the eyes with carpet cleaner?
    time out? saying no? in a calm voice say "that was bad...please don't do that again..."?

    That's the freaking point. If the kid isn't able to respond in any other way other then lashing out, then there is a freaking problem there that needs to be addressed by a professional.

    Man, you act like every child just goes around hittting everything they see, that isn't true at all. The kid isn't throwing a tantrum, the kid is violently assulting his parents and spraying oven cleaner in a babies face... this is not fucking normal behavior.

    Sentry on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    wrote:
    When I was a little kid, I always pretended I was the hero,' Skip said.
    'Fuck yeah, me too. What little kid ever pretended to be part of the lynch-mob?'
  • IncenjucarIncenjucar Not a Fictional Character Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    On the oven-cleaner thing: The kid probably had no idea it was that harmful. He may have just seen someone spraying a cat with a water bottle or something.

    This is why you ask questions.

    Incenjucar on
  • brandotheninjamasterbrandotheninjamaster Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    if the kid can't sit still for more than 15 minutes then he is not going to care about a conversation. On the topic of conversations, I have yet to have a deeply profound and moving conversation with a 4 year old.

    and with the blindfold, if this kid is disobedient to begin with do you think that he will keep that blindfold on? or will he adjust in secret so that he see? judging from the OP he would rip off the blindfold and terrorize the house.

    brandotheninjamaster on
  • SentrySentry Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Incenjucar wrote: »
    On the oven-cleaner thing: The kid probably had no idea it was that harmful. He may have just seen someone spraying a cat with a water bottle or something.

    This is why you ask questions.

    That likely depends on prior interactions with the oven cleaner... I mean, a four year old with ready access to the stuff has likely been instructed or reprimanded on the dangers of it... although I agree it is likely he didn't know how harmful it could be, or possibly that it was harmful at all.

    I still don't think the behavior described by the OP is normal acting out behavior... but perhaps I'm wrong. Honestly, I'm just glad the OP didn't make us critque the kids website...

    Sentry on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    wrote:
    When I was a little kid, I always pretended I was the hero,' Skip said.
    'Fuck yeah, me too. What little kid ever pretended to be part of the lynch-mob?'
  • CasketCasket __BANNED USERS regular
    edited August 2007
    Maybe send the kid to a corner with a 90 degree angle and make him stay there facing it.

    If that doesn't work, pick him up, put him in a dark, pitch black room and lock him in there for a while.

    Casket on
    casketiisigih1.png
  • brandotheninjamasterbrandotheninjamaster Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Casket wrote: »
    If that doesn't work, pick him up, put him in a dark, pitch black room and lock him in there for a while.

    what? think kids man. kids are for most part scared of the dark. That would do nothing but terrify the kid. good lord fear is one thing but thats terror.

    brandotheninjamaster on
  • IreneDAdlerIreneDAdler Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Casket wrote: »
    If that doesn't work, pick him up, put him in a dark, pitch black room and lock him in there for a while.

    ... You're kidding, right?
    right?

    P.S. I'm still scared of the dark. Once my boyfriend shoved me in the coat closet and held the door shut because... well I guess because he's an ass and he thought it'd be funny. I went beserk. I think he's sorry now. Maybe.
    I'm 25

    Don't lock kids in a dark closet.

    IreneDAdler on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Bliss 101Bliss 101 Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    You know, to get back on topic a bit: if the kid's problems stem from hyperactivity, it could be a purely physical thing. My cousin went pretty crazy for a year or so around five or six, and according to the doctor it was mostly about his metabolism at the time. They adjusted his diet and fed him some pills for a while and he turned into a perfectly well-adjusted kid (and, later, adult).

    Regardless of the cause, the behavior of the kid in the OP doesn't sound like something the H&A forumers can fix. A professional could, though.

    Bliss 101 on
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  • CasketCasket __BANNED USERS regular
    edited August 2007
    Meh, well, I was just trying to expand on that blindfold idea.

    If anything being in the dark will probably eventually make him immune to darkness, unless maybe you constantly tell him "It is very dark, you are likely to be eaten by a grue!".

    Casket on
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  • IncenjucarIncenjucar Not a Fictional Character Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    if the kid can't sit still for more than 15 minutes then he is not going to care about a conversation. On the topic of conversations, I have yet to have a deeply profound and moving conversation with a 4 year old.

    and with the blindfold, if this kid is disobedient to begin with do you think that he will keep that blindfold on? or will he adjust in secret so that he see? judging from the OP he would rip off the blindfold and terrorize the house.

    Yeah. See. My sister wasn't much better. Only she would torment cats.

    She also tried to stab me on three occasions when she was two, and almost dive-bombed my balls with her knees when I was on a couch when she was three.

    She was all wild and crazy and oh gee we have to spank her because she won't sit down and listen my parents said.

    But when -I- was babysitting her, I who never hit in any way shape or form, I'd get her under control just by putting her back in the corner, with minutes added every time she was a little shit (almost for an hour once).

    Afterwards, and sometimes during, we'd have a good long talk, and she would behave perfectly well until my folks got home, at which point she turned into a bitch again, because they would still do their shitty excuse for parenting.

    To this day, she's perfectly well-behaved when she's not around my parents, but turns into an absolute bitch when they're around.

    --

    The blindfold would be a one-time thing to show the kid how much it sucks being blind, dude.

    Incenjucar on
  • brandotheninjamasterbrandotheninjamaster Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Casket wrote: »
    Meh, well, I was just trying to expand on that blindfold idea.

    If anything being in the dark will probably eventually make him immune to darkness, unless maybe you constantly tell him "It is very dark, you are likely to be eaten by a grue!".

    How about we shove you in a lions den and then say don't sorry they just ate you should be fine. Thats how terrifying it would be for a kid.

    brandotheninjamaster on
  • inertinert Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    my g/f's brother has a similar problem. he's not really overtly vicious the way this tyke sounds, but he's very oppositional and has a moderate to serious level of ADD. he takes medication for both, as there is actually a condition that accounts for the former but i cant recall the name.

    basically, whatever this child has, there is more than likely some form of therapy/medication that will help. some kids are simply born to be bad, i suppose. there's no real reason my g/f's brother shouldn't be a perfectly normal kid, as his parents are both good at...well, parenting.

    i hate to kick the horse that's already lying dead, but i'm gonna hop on the "see a professional" bandwagon.

    honestly i wonder sometimes what's causing so many kids to be so emotionally unbalanced at such an early age. i mean, are they really born this way? i've often thought that it could really be everything that's being put in the things we eat nowadays. hormones, pesticides, etc... is that paranoid? eh i dunno...

    but anyway, he's right to see a pro on this, if the child's in that bad a way.

    inert on
    Hell hath no limits, nor is restricted itself to one place; for where we are is Hell, And where Hell is, there must we ever be. ~ Marlowe
  • Bliss 101Bliss 101 Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    if the kid can't sit still for more than 15 minutes then he is not going to care about a conversation. On the topic of conversations, I have yet to have a deeply profound and moving conversation with a 4 year old.

    Do you have children, or do you take care of children regularly (or ever)? I'd wager (and hope) that you don't. You can have pretty damn profound and moving conversations with four year olds.

    Bliss 101 on
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  • IncenjucarIncenjucar Not a Fictional Character Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    A great deal of the issues with kids today stem from a lack of parental involvement. Throwing pills at them, dropping them off at malls, etc.

    Modern parents are horribly irresponsible.

    Incenjucar on
  • brandotheninjamasterbrandotheninjamaster Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Bliss 101 wrote: »
    if the kid can't sit still for more than 15 minutes then he is not going to care about a conversation. On the topic of conversations, I have yet to have a deeply profound and moving conversation with a 4 year old.

    Do you have children, or do you take care of children regularly (or ever)? I'd wager (and hope) that you don't. You can have pretty damn profound and moving conversations with four year olds.

    coincidentally enough I have a 4 yr old.

    brandotheninjamaster on
  • CasketCasket __BANNED USERS regular
    edited August 2007
    Casket wrote: »
    Meh, well, I was just trying to expand on that blindfold idea.

    If anything being in the dark will probably eventually make him immune to darkness, unless maybe you constantly tell him "It is very dark, you are likely to be eaten by a grue!".

    How about we shove you in a lions den and then say don't sorry they just ate you should be fine. Thats how terrifying it would be for a kid.

    Yes, well if I had just committed a spree of crimes that might be a fitting punishment for a while.

    Casket on
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  • Brodo FagginsBrodo Faggins Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Theungry wrote: »
    Wow, I'm kind of shocked at the violence and intimidation techniques being suggested. I would strongly advise against any of those unless you want to teach this child that bullying is a good way to solve interpersonal conflicts.

    I dunno, this seems like something some child psychologist came up with just to sell a book.

    I got my ass whupped when I was a kid, and I'm grateful my parents did it. It doesn't teach bullying, it teaches a kid the fact that if he misbehaves, there's going to be negative consequences, and he would do well to behave.

    Brodo Faggins on
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  • IncenjucarIncenjucar Not a Fictional Character Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Brodo: Only if the largess of the psychological community is screwing with people. This is pretty standard stuff. Violence isn't a guarantee of fucked up kids, but it really really doesn't help.

    Incenjucar on
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