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OH GOD I'M DOOMED

GABBO GABBO GABBOGABBO GABBO GABBO Registered User regular
edited September 2007 in Social Entropy++
I just came home from work and my cats have both barfed in at least a dozen places.
It looks like that scene out of The Meaning Of Life, only a cat version.
The carpet shampooer just died on me and has to charge, how the hell am I supposed to get dried pools of vomit out of my hall carpet now?

GABBO GABBO GABBO on
«13

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    ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Cry on them.

    ChicoBlue on
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    MarshmallowMarshmallow Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    That's why I don't have carpets.

    Marshmallow on
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    FlavabeanFlavabean Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    The Alpha and the Omega.

    Flavabean on
    newsig.jpg
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    OrestesOrestes Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Wank, and jizz over the pools.

    Jizz is an all purpose cleaner, dontch'a know?

    Orestes on
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    Filler Inc.Filler Inc. Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Rub them with a pair of 200 dollar jeans.

    ho ho ho i m funy

    Filler Inc. on
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    yourclothesyourclothes __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2007
    god it just makes me think of the sound they make

    the cat throw up sound
    uhgu

    yourclothes on
    ssseeee.gif
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    NogsNogs Crap, crap, mega crap. Crap, crap, mega crap.Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    dead cats everywhere.

    Nogs on
    rotate.jpg
    PARKER, YOU'RE FIRED! <-- My comic book podcast! Satan look here!
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    GABBO GABBO GABBOGABBO GABBO GABBO Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    That's why I don't have carpets.

    It was way worse on the hardwood floors, but I'm scrubbing that shit up with clorox wipes.
    Seriously, I grew up farming and this is gross even for me.
    I went into the bathroom and one of them also managed to SHIT ON TOP OF THE LITTER BOX.
    I gagged.

    GABBO GABBO GABBO on
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    MulysaSemproniusMulysaSempronius but also susie nyRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    water+paper towels?

    MulysaSempronius on
    If that's all there is my friends, then let's keep dancing
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    IpseDixitIpseDixit Treat me like a pirate And give me that bootyRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Hire somebody to clean it for you. See if they'll barter for fancy pants.

    IpseDixit on
    ipsesignew.jpg
    Flickr - PSN ID - IamTetsuo - Steam
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    GABBO GABBO GABBOGABBO GABBO GABBO Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    water+paper towels?

    It's dried into the carpet.

    GABBO GABBO GABBO on
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    KadithKadith Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    didn't you fill a sink with vomit once

    if so this karma

    if not

    it reminds me of it.

    Kadith on
    zkHcp.jpg
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    ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Put some newspaper over them.

    ChicoBlue on
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    BlankspaceBlankspace __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2007
    Scissors+a buncha new rugs.

    Blankspace on
    SIG.gif
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    nevilleneville The Worst Gay (Seriously. The Worst!)Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    find someone to eat the cats
    ALF.jpg

    neville on
    nevillexmassig1.png
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    GABBO GABBO GABBOGABBO GABBO GABBO Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Kadith wrote: »
    didn't you fill a sink with vomit once

    if so this karma

    if not

    it reminds me of it.

    I'd link you to the chatlog, but some cocksucker appears to have removed it.
    It was an epic thread.

    GABBO GABBO GABBO on
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    ANARCHakeANARCHake Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    club soda

    ANARCHake on
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    GABBO GABBO GABBOGABBO GABBO GABBO Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Seriously, he shit on top of the litterbox.
    How can something so cute be so gross?
    453023850_9173fda2e2.jpg

    Who wants him?

    GABBO GABBO GABBO on
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    MarshmallowMarshmallow Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    http://www.howtodothings.com/pets-and-animals/a1612-how-to-clean-cat-vomit-off-of-your-carpet.html

    The following puddle process has worked well for fifteen years on a cheap, light colored, Berber carpet:

    1. Immediately scrape or spoon up as much of the puddle (solid and liquid) as possible. Avoid surface scrubbing as this will only drive the spew deeper into the carpet. All solids should be removed.

    2. With a rag or slightly moist sponge, soak up as much of the remaining moisture as possible use a dabbing motion...no scrubbing allowed.

    3. Once most of the liquid has been removed, begin a repetitive process of dabbing water on the spot with a wet sponge/cloth and then dabbing with a dry cloth or sponge to remove the water. The drying cloth/sponge will become damp, so be prepared to wring it out periodically. The goal is to get the spot fairly wet (but not excessively soppy) to flush the area and then dab away most of the water. Repeat two or three times as necessary.

    4. At this point all traces of the incident may have disappeared and, following a final dab drying with a dry cloth, you are done. Avoid walking on the spot until it has air-dried.

    5. If a stain is still visible, it's time for a commercial cleaner. There are many choices, so simply follow the directions on the bottle. Try to stay with the dabbing process and only resort to scrubbing when a vigorous shampooing is the necessary last resort.

    6. Once done, check your cat to see if there are any signs of illness that require attention or if this was your routine healthy cat spew that we have all come to dread.

    Try this maybe?

    Marshmallow on
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    GABBO GABBO GABBOGABBO GABBO GABBO Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    ANARCHake wrote: »
    club soda

    What about pyramid ale? That's all I have.

    GABBO GABBO GABBO on
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    KetBraKetBra Dressed Ridiculously Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    I know I usually use this pet-stain cleaner stuff that comes in a spray bottle to clean up after my cats decide it would be a good idea to shit all over the goddamn living room. Works pretty well. Something like this stuff.

    KetBra on
    KGMvDLc.jpg?1
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    GABBO GABBO GABBOGABBO GABBO GABBO Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    http://www.howtodothings.com/pets-and-animals/a1612-how-to-clean-cat-vomit-off-of-your-carpet.html

    The following puddle process has worked well for fifteen years on a cheap, light colored, Berber carpet:

    1. Immediately scrape or spoon up as much of the puddle (solid and liquid) as possible. Avoid surface scrubbing as this will only drive the spew deeper into the carpet. All solids should be removed.

    2. With a rag or slightly moist sponge, soak up as much of the remaining moisture as possible use a dabbing motion...no scrubbing allowed.

    3. Once most of the liquid has been removed, begin a repetitive process of dabbing water on the spot with a wet sponge/cloth and then dabbing with a dry cloth or sponge to remove the water. The drying cloth/sponge will become damp, so be prepared to wring it out periodically. The goal is to get the spot fairly wet (but not excessively soppy) to flush the area and then dab away most of the water. Repeat two or three times as necessary.

    4. At this point all traces of the incident may have disappeared and, following a final dab drying with a dry cloth, you are done. Avoid walking on the spot until it has air-dried.

    5. If a stain is still visible, it's time for a commercial cleaner. There are many choices, so simply follow the directions on the bottle. Try to stay with the dabbing process and only resort to scrubbing when a vigorous shampooing is the necessary last resort.

    6. Once done, check your cat to see if there are any signs of illness that require attention or if this was your routine healthy cat spew that we have all come to dread.

    This is going to take a hundred years.
    Oof.

    GABBO GABBO GABBO on
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    Katchem_ashKatchem_ash __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2007
    The Cat God does not like you very much. It hasn't been pleased. Please it with a 100 Dog's Blood and thier skulls. All the while shouting "DOG BLOOD FOR THE CAT GOD, DOG SKULLS FOR THE CAT THRONE!"

    Katchem_ash on
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    Filler Inc.Filler Inc. Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Seriously, he shit on top of the litterbox.
    How can something so cute be so gross?
    453023850_9173fda2e2.jpg

    Who wants him?

    We already know he pukes everywhere, why would we want him?

    Throw in the carpet cleaner and you got a deal.

    Filler Inc. on
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    #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    I'd hire someone.

    work for a whole day and probably puke a couple times and do a half assed job or go to the movies and drop $50 for a professional who probably cleans cat vomit every other day.

    #pipe on
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    KadithKadith Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    burn the house down and start anew

    Kadith on
    zkHcp.jpg
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    GABBO GABBO GABBOGABBO GABBO GABBO Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Seriously, he shit on top of the litterbox.
    How can something so cute be so gross?
    453023850_9173fda2e2.jpg

    Who wants him?

    We already know he pukes everywhere, why would we want him?

    Throw in the carpet cleaner and you got a deal.

    How about I just throw in the other cat?
    445714869_5db276157a.jpg

    GABBO GABBO GABBO on
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    IpseDixitIpseDixit Treat me like a pirate And give me that bootyRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Seriously though, get some carpet stain remover, let it soak for a while then scrub it out with paper towels. Cat vomit usually comes out pretty easily even after it's dried.

    IpseDixit on
    ipsesignew.jpg
    Flickr - PSN ID - IamTetsuo - Steam
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    GABBO GABBO GABBOGABBO GABBO GABBO Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    I AM NOTHING WITHOUT MY BISSEL

    GABBO GABBO GABBO on
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    BlankspaceBlankspace __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2007
    Mani, this is just an elaborate excuse to show off your cats.

    Blankspace on
    SIG.gif
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    Katchem_ashKatchem_ash __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2007
    Also remember Mani, that if you have a Dog in the House or a Dog anywhere near your house, the Cat God orders you to find it and sacrifice it to the Cat God and pray he forgives you and orders the cats to be nice.

    The Cat God also commands you keep shouting "DOG BLOOD FOR THE CAT GOD, DOG SKULLS FOR THE CAT THRONE!"

    Katchem_ash on
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    SoupSoup Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    so uh k_a did you just find out about Khorne or something

    Soup on
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    KadithKadith Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    I had a cat that looked just like that second one.

    Kadith on
    zkHcp.jpg
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    The_ScarabThe_Scarab Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    The correct answer is napalm.

    Then get to work on the carpet.

    The_Scarab on
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    GABBO GABBO GABBOGABBO GABBO GABBO Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Blankspace wrote: »
    Mani, this is just an elaborate excuse to show off your cats.

    I can show you his poo on top of the litterbox.
    It is not pretty.
    I'm at my desk drinking up the courage to go in there, and the smell is creeping into my office even now.

    GABBO GABBO GABBO on
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    Katchem_ashKatchem_ash __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2007
    Or you know, keep more cats. The Cat God can be really pick at times. You got to please it anyway you can. I recommend getting sacrificing Dogs and getting more Cats. That should also help. Your house will become clean by itself.

    Katchem_ash on
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    RuckusRuckus Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Buy a new house.

    Ruckus on
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    GABBO GABBO GABBOGABBO GABBO GABBO Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Kadith wrote: »
    I had a cat that looked just like that second one.

    She was a stray, and she cries for attention so often sometimes even when you are petting her god shut up gozer shut up

    GABBO GABBO GABBO on
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    BlankspaceBlankspace __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2007
    Blankspace wrote: »
    Mani, this is just an elaborate excuse to show off your cats.

    I can show you his poo on top of the litterbox.
    It is not pretty.
    I'm at my desk drinking up the courage to go in there, and the smell is creeping into my office even now.
    DO IT YOU PUSSY

    Blankspace on
    SIG.gif
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    AbracadanielAbracadaniel Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    manifest you just made me laugh so fucking hard with that OP

    Abracadaniel on
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