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Death is fucking horrible.

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    J3pJ3p Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Sars_Boy wrote: »
    So some kid at my school died earlier this week

    I just found it was because the kid was trying to asphyxiate himself with masturbating

    After hearing this, my mother tried to speak with me on the safeties of masturbation

    I think I am going to leave the house for a couple hours now

    You just reminded me of Guts.

    Thhaaaaaaannnkkss

    J3p on
    +./\ 50 ?. 50
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    FandyienFandyien But Otto, what about us? Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    With everything we know about it, I'm frankly surprised auto-erotic aspyhxiation is a continuing trend.

    What the fuck are these people thinging? It'll be fine, I'll just aspyhxiate myself a wee bit

    Fandyien on
    reposig.jpg
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    satansfingerssatansfingers Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    i just want to know who was the pioneer who came up with autoerotic asphyxiation

    truly a king

    satansfingers on
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    MeissnerdMeissnerd Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Sars_Boy wrote: »
    So some kid at my school died earlier this week

    I just found it was because the kid was trying to asphyxiate himself with masturbating

    After hearing this, my mother tried to speak with me on the safeties of masturbation

    I think I am going to leave the house for a couple hours now

    Ahahahah Sars Boy tell me what she said

    Did she recommend gloves or something

    Meissnerd on
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    Riggs BlitzkriegRiggs Blitzkrieg Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    It was this guy who was jerking off at work. He had to wear a tie that day but didnt know how to tie it properly so it was tight all day long. He started to jerk off in the bathroom and get all excited and shit, breating heavily. But he noticed that the tie was hindering all his breathing but he liked it, so he got it tighter. He finally blew the biggest load of his life. He then went home and did it again with a leather belt.

    He wrote an article in a fetish magazine about it

    Riggs Blitzkrieg on
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    Riggs BlitzkriegRiggs Blitzkrieg Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Maybe this kid was jerking off in hiding in his house. He was scared that his dad would find him. Because his dad was super religious and told him if he jerked off he was signing his dick and soul to satan. Well this kid was so close to bust a load, it took longer back then because no one had as much lube laying around as they do now, when his dad busted him. He worked to hard to stop now so he kept going while his dad charged at him. While pumping his dick, his dad grabbed him by the throat yelling at him to stop and that he is sinning. The dad choked him hard and the kid blew an epic load right on the dads slacks.

    After that blew over he told his friends about chocking themselves while jerking it. They all did it together because that experience fucked him up

    Riggs Blitzkrieg on
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    satansfingerssatansfingers Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    wikipedia claims it all started when people noticed the wicked boner that victims of hangings got

    satansfingers on
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    SquashuaSquashua __BANNED USERS regular
    edited December 2007
    Fort1tude wrote: »
    Dumb Hero wrote: »
    You can use a potion to ward off Death

    Excellent :^:

    So... the word "Mosque" was used. Was this maybe a hate-crime?

    Squashua on
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    Riggs BlitzkriegRiggs Blitzkrieg Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    "Did you see that huge boner that dead guy got from choking?"

    "Yeah, how could I not see it?"

    "Lets go to my house. I have an idea"

    Riggs Blitzkrieg on
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    Sars_BoySars_Boy Rest, You Are The Lightning. Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Meissnerd wrote: »
    Sars_Boy wrote: »
    So some kid at my school died earlier this week

    I just found it was because the kid was trying to asphyxiate himself with masturbating

    After hearing this, my mother tried to speak with me on the safeties of masturbation

    I think I am going to leave the house for a couple hours now

    Ahahahah Sars Boy tell me what she said

    Did she recommend gloves or something
    Mom: you know he died trying to choke himself when he was masturbating

    Me: Oh, damn, that's unfortunate

    Mom: Now, I know you do that.

    Me: What, choke myself? jesus christ!

    Mom: No....masturbate

    Me: Ok, we've had enough of this conversation

    Mom: I just hope you know that doing that choking thing isn't safe, and tell your friends that too

    At this point I just stopped responding

    Sars_Boy on
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    FencingsaxFencingsax It is difficult to get a man to understand, when his salary depends upon his not understanding GNU Terry PratchettRegistered User regular
    edited December 2007
    "Did you see that huge boner that dead guy got from choking?"

    "Yeah, how could I not see it?"

    "Lets go to my house. I have an idea"
    Necrophilia is never funny.

    Fencingsax on
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    JavenJaven Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Found out my 87 year old grandmother was diagnosed with a malignant tumor about three months ago. She is bed ridden 90% of the time and they say she's lucky if she makes it to the New Year.

    There goes my vacation to Ireland.

    Javen on
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    Me Too!Me Too! __BANNED USERS regular
    edited December 2007
    I want my body to be taxidermied and set up in my local comic shop, as a model for all of the geek tshirts.
    The one stipulation is that they have to start carrying the Green Lantern shirt.

    Me Too! on
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    [Deleted User][Deleted User] new member
    edited December 2007
    The user and all related content has been deleted.

    [Deleted User] on
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    Lucky CynicLucky Cynic Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    frozen in hopes of the future reviving me

    or if i get lucky, brain uploaded to a computer

    Seriously, that's what I am hoping for, being a machine. No eating, no sleeping... just an oil change every 3,000 miles and battery swap and I can live forever!

    Lucky Cynic on
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    Centipede DamascusCentipede Damascus Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    upload my ghost to the internet

    let me loose across the digital aether

    Centipede Damascus on
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    Dublo7Dublo7 Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    ghost_in_the_machine.gif

    t-t-t-t-t-t-t-techno thriller

    uns uns uns uns

    Dublo7 on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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    RagixRagix Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Yesterday was the funeral. I don't know if you have ever seen what a Muslim funeral is like, or if you ever will.. but just so you know, they involve the family men and friends (that means me and my other male classmates) going to the hospital/morgue, carrying the body in a coffin over to the house of the family where women could separately weep, grief, and say goodbye to the deceased. Then we have to carry it to the mosque where the family males say goodbye, then those who pray, pray in the mosque before the coffin (with the body in it!), and then it's carried to a cemetery where a priest reads a few words and the body is buried.
    In our case we didn't get to carry the coffin because of our weak young teenage muscles. You can imagine how tired I was when I finally came home after 7 hours of walking my geek body around town.
    Pony wrote: »
    i have never found myself emotionally effected by the deaths of people close to me

    i have, however, found myself emotionally effected by the effect those deaths have on the living people who are close to me.

    for example

    when my grandfather died.

    i loved my grandfather. he was a wonderful man. but i did not cry at his funeral. i was quiet, respectful, and i was just sort of calmly contemplating the effect this good man had on my life. then i saw my father sob uncontrollably, and i got very upset. i realized afterwards i wasn't really upset about my grandfather's death, i was upset that my father was dealing with it so badly. i was sad because my dad was hurt.

    This is the exact same thing that happened to me yesterday at the funeral. I was really sad when the body arrived to the family home, and my eyes kinda teared a bit. When women started weeping and falling to the ground crying, my eyes teared more. Finally when my tough friends started to cry (with tears out and all) I had to turn my face the other way. It was the first time I ever see my buddies cry like this. :|
    Javen wrote: »
    Found out my 87 year old grandmother was diagnosed with a malignant tumor about three months ago. She is bed ridden 90% of the time and they say she's lucky if she makes it to the New Year.

    :(

    Ragix on
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    Centipede DamascusCentipede Damascus Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Dublo7 wrote: »
    267595_det.jpg

    Centipede Damascus on
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    Dublo7Dublo7 Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Dublo7 wrote: »
    267595_det.jpg

    terri1.jpg

    Think about it.

    Dublo7 on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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    Dublo7Dublo7 Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    terri_schiavo1x400.jpg

    man, Terri Schiavo used to be a babe.

    Dublo7 on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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    Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver You don't have to attend every argument you are invited to. Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited December 2007
    Only one grandparent was alive when I was born. Two were killed by smoking (which makes me rather judgmental towards smokers), one was died due to alcohol withdraw.

    When my grandmother finally did die, I wasn't struck too badly by it. She had been living a good distance away in an assisted living facility in Louisiana and I hadn't seen her for years. In fact, I didn't feel sad so much as regret, that I hadn't spent more time with her.

    Munkus Beaver on
    Humor can be dissected as a frog can, but dies in the process.
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    RagixRagix Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Only one grandparent was alive when I was born. Two were killed by smoking (which makes me rather judgmental towards smokers), one was died due to alcohol withdraw.

    When my grandmother finally did die, I wasn't struck too badly by it. She had been living a good distance away in an assisted living facility in Louisiana and I hadn't seen her for years. In fact, I didn't feel sad so much as regret, that I hadn't spent more time with her.

    I felt the same thing when my last living grandparent died (my grandfather). He had been living in another town and the last time I saw him I was 8 years old or so. I remember him asking me to get him some cigarettes but I refused (they told me not to give him). I guess that's what killed him. That and drinking.

    When I heard the news I was about 12, but I didn't feel sadness as much as regret that I didn't know him too well.

    Ragix on
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    chubschubs Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    A good friend of mine recently committed suicide. Pretty crummy.

    chubs on
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    Volucrisus AedriusVolucrisus Aedrius Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Pony wrote: »
    i have never found myself emotionally effected by the deaths of people close to me

    i have, however, found myself emotionally effected by the effect those deaths have on the living people who are close to me.

    for example

    when my grandfather died.

    i loved my grandfather. he was a wonderful man. but i did not cry at his funeral. i was quiet, respectful, and i was just sort of calmly contemplating the effect this good man had on my life. then i saw my father sob uncontrollably, and i got very upset. i realized afterwards i wasn't really upset about my grandfather's death, i was upset that my father was dealing with it so badly. i was sad because my dad was hurt.

    I was the exact same way at my Grandfather's funeral, but I didn't actually cry, mostly because my father wasn't crying. He's like me in that way, or rather, I suppose I am like him. When I saw him standing proudly, the first born son, the man the rest of the family looks to for guidance, I promised myself in that instant that I wouldn't cry at his eventual funeral, and I used the moment and the emotion to explore the avenues of life, all the nuances, those cherished moments, and coming out of the funeral I felt refreshed and strengthened. I mourned, and then shed that grief, and reawakened as I walked back to the car with a greater appreciation of my Grandfather and the celebration that is life.

    Volucrisus Aedrius on
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    stimtokolosstimtokolos Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Pony wrote: »
    i have never found myself emotionally effected by the deaths of people close to me

    i have, however, found myself emotionally effected by the effect those deaths have on the living people who are close to me.

    for example

    when my grandfather died.

    i loved my grandfather. he was a wonderful man. but i did not cry at his funeral. i was quiet, respectful, and i was just sort of calmly contemplating the effect this good man had on my life. then i saw my father sob uncontrollably, and i got very upset. i realized afterwards i wasn't really upset about my grandfather's death, i was upset that my father was dealing with it so badly. i was sad because my dad was hurt.

    I was the exact same way at my Grandfather's funeral, but I didn't actually cry, mostly because my father wasn't crying. He's like me in that way, or rather, I suppose I am like him. When I saw him standing proudly, the first born son, the man the rest of the family looks to for guidance, I promised myself in that instant that I wouldn't cry at his eventual funeral, and I used the moment and the emotion to explore the avenues of life, all the nuances, those cherished moments, and coming out of the funeral I felt refreshed and strengthened. I mourned, and then shed that grief, and reawakened as I walked back to the car with a greater appreciation of my Grandfather and the celebration that is life.

    I was going to say what Pony said, typed it out then chose not to post it. Recent example is my best friends mother who died, I wasn't sad even though she had been the nicest lady to me and my family, but because my friend was hurt.

    stimtokolos on
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    ObbiObbi Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited December 2007
    chubs wrote: »
    A good friend of mine recently committed suicide. Pretty crummy.

    Bleargh. That happened to me back when dinosaurs roamed the internets. Must've been about 5 years ago, I guess. Which is weird, I was rememberin' him just the other day and realized that his death was what changed my outlook on life and most things that people bitch n' moan about.

    Incidentally, a month after his suicide I dropped out of public school and signed up at this forum!

    feel for you, chubs, a person dyin' in an accident is horrible, but suicide just makes you feel like it was somethin' you could've helped prevent.

    Obbi on
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    BYToadyBYToady Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    My cousin decided that running a hose from the tailpipe to the driver side window was the proper answer to his father suing him for child support money.

    Explanation: The dad was suing his son, because he felt his son wasted the money that was spent sending him to school. Son got depressed about this and killed himself. I agree Obbi, it does feel like something I could have helped prevent because we were close friends, and I wasn't there to talk to him while all this was going on. (I was out of state and didn't even hear about this whole lawsuit bullshit until after the suicide.)

    BYToady on
    Battletag BYToady#1454
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    HozHoz Cool Cat Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    I never think about killing myself but I frequently think about getting killed, in a "that would cool" kind of way. What is up with that, Internet Psychologists?

    Hoz on
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    Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver You don't have to attend every argument you are invited to. Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited December 2007
    I remember I went to a camp where one of the campers had committed suicide. Not at camp, of course, it was sometime during the school year but people were talking about it when we all met up at camp. People kept talking about the guy and about how cool he was and how they missed him etc. One group even tried to start up a fund to buy new rocking chairs in his memory. And all of that pissed me the right fuck off.

    Oh yes. Put suicide on a high perch. That certainly won't help the troubled people to think that if they want to be remembered, suicide is the way to go. I get the same feeling whenever CNN plasters the pictures of the people who commit shootings all over the news. Congratulations for encouraging this sort of behavior, fellas!

    Munkus Beaver on
    Humor can be dissected as a frog can, but dies in the process.
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    stimtokolosstimtokolos Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    I remember I went to a camp where one of the campers had committed suicide. Not at camp, of course, it was sometime during the school year but people were talking about it when we all met up at camp. People kept talking about the guy and about how cool he was and how they missed him etc. One group even tried to start up a fund to buy new rocking chairs in his memory. And all of that pissed me the right fuck off.

    Oh yes. Put suicide on a high perch. That certainly won't help the troubled people to think that if they want to be remembered, suicide is the way to go. I get the same feeling whenever CNN plasters the pictures of the people who commit shootings all over the news. Congratulations for encouraging this sort of behavior, fellas!

    I agree with what you've put forward here, sure remember people, but why don't people who die of 'natural' causes seem to get as much attention.

    stimtokolos on
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    MatatatMatatat Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Because you can't create a dramatic news story about a guy who died in his sleep of entirely natural causes

    Matatat on
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    ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Dying from self-inflicted injury is perfectly natural.

    ChicoBlue on
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    BYToadyBYToady Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    It is perfectly natural to die when you run out of blood.

    BYToady on
    Battletag BYToady#1454
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    stimtokolosstimtokolos Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Matatat wrote: »
    Because you can't create a dramatic news story about a guy who died in his sleep of entirely natural causes

    No, not like this, as in a student kills themselves, versus say a student is hit by a car.

    stimtokolos on
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    BYToadyBYToady Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Matatat wrote: »
    Because you can't create a dramatic news story about a guy who died in his sleep of entirely natural causes

    No, not like this, as in a student kills themselves, versus say a student is hit by a car.

    News companies can't really sell you on being paranoid about your kids when it comes to cars. But they love to make you think your kids are going to kill themselves.

    BYToady on
    Battletag BYToady#1454
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    MatatatMatatat Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Those kind of things always seem to get reported around here, but admittedly only in local newspapers

    But yeah suicide is so selfish, my sister's godfather shot himself in the head and let his mother find his body the next day when she went to see him, fucking selfish

    Matatat on
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    Regicid3Regicid3 Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Cut my life into pieces!

    This is my last resort!

    Regicid3 on
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    Milquetoast ThugMilquetoast Thug Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Once, one of my birds died....

    ...after my friend from the pet shop tried to give it an enema to cure it's egg-binding problem

    It was tragic then, but in retrospect it was kinda hilarious.

    So I guess I'm saying I'm kinda a dick

    Milquetoast Thug on
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    Milquetoast ThugMilquetoast Thug Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    I mean, I'm not one of those people who finds the Darwin awards hilarious; I think it's pretty terrible to celebrate someone else's death

    But I'm not going to pretend that I particularly care, either

    I'm just trying to be neutral here

    Milquetoast Thug on
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