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Zero Punctuation: Retard Reaction Round Up; I fucking hate you people

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Posts

  • zakkielzakkiel Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    Am I too late to talk about this damn review?

    Well, too bad. I just got done with work. We're starting this bitch right back up.
    Over all, I did not find it funny, but I freely admit that this boils down to the fact that I love the game and he hates it. The only thing that really bothers me about it - other than his repetition of the obnoxiously stupid lolbuttonmashing myth - is his last couple of lines. Basically I hatehatehate suggestions of false consciousness of any kind, and that's what he implies is going on with everyone who actually likes the game. Also, he sneers at people who defended the Wii from the beginning, and guess what? They were proved right about as thoroughly and conclusively as one can get for future predictions. Maybe you wish they weren't, but they were.
    That said, blaming the guy for being what he is is like blaming a dog for eating its own shit.

    zakkiel on
    Account not recoverable. So long.
  • PancakePancake Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    zakkiel wrote: »
    Also, he sneers at people who defended the Wii from the beginning, and guess what? They were proved right about as thoroughly and conclusively as one can get for future predictions. Maybe you wish they weren't, but they were.

    You were probably too filled with Nintendo nerd rage at the time to really pick up on the subtle nuances of his rant, but he was referring to the name. "Nintendo Wii" is a pretty stupid name, you know.

    Pancake on
    wAgWt.jpg
  • FugitiveFugitive Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    To be fair the Wii is a pretty atrocious name.

    Fugitive on
  • ZackSchillingZackSchilling Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    Pancake wrote: »
    zakkiel wrote: »
    Also, he sneers at people who defended the Wii from the beginning, and guess what? They were proved right about as thoroughly and conclusively as one can get for future predictions. Maybe you wish they weren't, but they were.

    You were probably too filled with Nintendo nerd rage at the time to really pick up on the subtle nuances of his rant, but he was referring to the name. "Nintendo Wii" is a pretty stupid name, you know.

    No you see, it embodies togetherness and... damnit, where did I put that fucking marketing book...

    Edit: I found it.
    Wii will break down that wall that separates video game players from everybody else.

    Wii will put people more in touch with their games ... and each other. But you're probably asking: What does the name mean?

    Wii sounds like "we," which emphasizes this console is for everyone.

    Wii can easily be remembered by people around the world, no matter what language they speak. No confusion. No need to abbreviate. Just Wii.

    Wii has a distinctive "ii" spelling that symbolizes both the unique controllers and the image of people gathering to play.

    And Wii, as a name and a console, brings something revolutionary to the world of video games that sets it apart from the crowd.

    So that's Wii. But now Nintendo needs you.

    Because, it's really not about you or me.

    It's about Wii.

    And together, Wii will change everything.

    ZackSchilling on
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  • IriahIriah Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    The Wii sucks. I'm not even joking.

    Iriah on
  • zakkielzakkiel Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    Pancake wrote: »
    zakkiel wrote: »
    Also, he sneers at people who defended the Wii from the beginning, and guess what? They were proved right about as thoroughly and conclusively as one can get for future predictions. Maybe you wish they weren't, but they were.

    You were probably too filled with Nintendo nerd rage at the time to really pick up on the subtle nuances of his rant, but he was referring to the name. "Nintendo Wii" is a pretty stupid name, you know.

    Or possibly he just talks really fast and I misunderstood. Maybe he might even be famous for talking fast? I don't know. But thanks for the asshattery.

    In that case, I amend my statement to "No one I know who likes SSBB liked the name Wii, and I would bet both nuts that the percentage in the English-speaking world as a whole is pretty goddamn small."

    zakkiel on
    Account not recoverable. So long.
  • Xenocide GeekXenocide Geek Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    you know why SSB fails

    because it's just super fucking smash brothers melee with new characters and maps!

    i loved me some SSBM back in the day, but man, after waiting so long for SSB to come out and... shit, i don't know what i was expecting - something more different, i guess - but for it to just be more of the same, agghhh

    Xenocide Geek on
    i wanted love, i needed love
    most of all, most of all
    someone said true love was dead
    but i'm bound to fall
    bound to fall for you
    oh what can i do
  • FugitiveFugitive Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    you know why SSB fails

    because it's just super fucking smash brothers melee with new characters and maps!

    i loved me some SSBM back in the day, but man, after waiting so long for SSB to come out and... shit, i don't know what i was expecting - something more different, i guess - but for it to just be more of the same, agghhh

    I know I was disappointed about Halo 3 having guns again also.

    Fugitive on
  • Speed RacerSpeed Racer Scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratchRegistered User regular
    edited April 2008
    you know why SSB fails

    because it's just super fucking smash brothers melee with new characters and maps!

    i loved me some SSBM back in the day, but man, after waiting so long for SSB to come out and... shit, i don't know what i was expecting - something more different, i guess - but for it to just be more of the same, agghhh

    The entire physics engine is different. They couldn't change it more without making a new game all together, at which point what's even the point of calling it Smash Bros.?

    Speed Racer on
  • PancakePancake Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    you know why SSB fails

    because it's just super fucking smash brothers melee with new characters and maps!

    i loved me some SSBM back in the day, but man, after waiting so long for SSB to come out and... shit, i don't know what i was expecting - something more different, i guess - but for it to just be more of the same, agghhh

    The entire physics engine is different. They couldn't change it more without making a new game all together, at which point what's even the point of calling it Smash Bros.?

    There are ways to make sequels feel fresh and new.

    Nintendo isn't fond of doing so more than once every decade or so, but that's the way things go.

    Pancake on
    wAgWt.jpg
  • JavenJaven Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    you know why SSB fails

    because it's just super fucking smash brothers melee with new characters and maps!

    i loved me some SSBM back in the day, but man, after waiting so long for SSB to come out and... shit, i don't know what i was expecting - something more different, i guess - but for it to just be more of the same, agghhh

    The entire physics engine is different. They couldn't change it more without making a new game all together, at which point what's even the point of calling it Smash Bros.?

    Half Life seems to have managed fine

    Javen on
  • Xenocide GeekXenocide Geek Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    halo 2: released 2004.
    halo 3: released 2007.

    ssbm: released 2001.
    ssbb: released 2008.

    we're talking about a difference of four years here, dude.

    wow you dudes talked a lot while i was making this post. what i said was directed at fugitive

    Xenocide Geek on
    i wanted love, i needed love
    most of all, most of all
    someone said true love was dead
    but i'm bound to fall
    bound to fall for you
    oh what can i do
  • PotUPotU __BANNED USERS regular
    edited April 2008
    This thread is more painful than reading youtube comments.

    PotU on
    2mong9u.jpg
  • Xenocide GeekXenocide Geek Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    PotU wrote: »
    This thread is more painful than reading youtube comments.

    your voice is more painful than listening to youtube comments OMG SCORE

    byrned

    David%20Byrne%20b.jpg

    Xenocide Geek on
    i wanted love, i needed love
    most of all, most of all
    someone said true love was dead
    but i'm bound to fall
    bound to fall for you
    oh what can i do
  • Feels Good ManFeels Good Man Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    you know why SSB fails

    because it's just super fucking smash brothers melee with new characters and maps!

    i loved me some SSBM back in the day, but man, after waiting so long for SSB to come out and... shit, i don't know what i was expecting - something more different, i guess - but for it to just be more of the same, agghhh

    I'm going to be honest, I don't understand this critique if you only apply it to Smash Brothers. Unless you, too, are being sarcastic.

    SEE: Every sports game, fighting game, rhythm game ever that have had sequels.

    If its a general complaint, then yeah, sure.

    Feels Good Man on
  • quovadis13quovadis13 Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    Hey guys, I like Smash Bros. Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

    quovadis13 on
  • Zen VulgarityZen Vulgarity What a lovely day for tea Secret British ThreadRegistered User regular
    edited April 2008
    Neither.

    Are you a ravenous retard about the game?

    Zen Vulgarity on
  • agoajagoaj Top Tier One FearRegistered User regular
    edited April 2008
    Newcomer: Yahtzee?

    agoaj on
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  • PataPata Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    you know why SSB fails

    because it's just super fucking smash brothers melee with new characters and maps!

    i loved me some SSBM back in the day, but man, after waiting so long for SSB to come out and... shit, i don't know what i was expecting - something more different, i guess - but for it to just be more of the same, agghhh

    I'm going to be honest, I don't understand this critique if you only apply it to Smash Brothers. Unless you, too, are being sarcastic.

    SEE: Every sports game, fighting game, rhythm game ever that have had sequels.

    If its a general complaint, then yeah, sure.

    Nintendo isn't allowed to release sequels that are similar to the last game in the series.

    Pata on
    SRWWSig.pngEpisode 5: Mecha-World, Mecha-nisim, Mecha-beasts
  • PancakePancake Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    Pata wrote: »
    you know why SSB fails

    because it's just super fucking smash brothers melee with new characters and maps!

    i loved me some SSBM back in the day, but man, after waiting so long for SSB to come out and... shit, i don't know what i was expecting - something more different, i guess - but for it to just be more of the same, agghhh

    I'm going to be honest, I don't understand this critique if you only apply it to Smash Brothers. Unless you, too, are being sarcastic.

    SEE: Every sports game, fighting game, rhythm game ever that have had sequels.

    If its a general complaint, then yeah, sure.

    Nintendo isn't allowed to release sequels that are similar to the last game in the series.

    Not when they do it consistently for twenty years and aren't bound by outside source materials to keep their games the same, no.

    Pancake on
    wAgWt.jpg
  • PataPata Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    Pancake wrote: »
    Not when they do it consistently for twenty years and aren't bound by outside source materials to keep their games the same, no.

    I'm pretty sure they're not that identical.

    Pata on
    SRWWSig.pngEpisode 5: Mecha-World, Mecha-nisim, Mecha-beasts
  • PataPata Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    I mean, for crying out loud, each new game in Nintendo's various series usually has some drastic difference between it and the previous game. Yet for some reason nobody pays attention to that, instead they focus on the similar core mechanics and same characters and cry "rehash"

    Pata on
    SRWWSig.pngEpisode 5: Mecha-World, Mecha-nisim, Mecha-beasts
  • Feels Good ManFeels Good Man Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    Pata wrote: »
    I mean, for crying out loud, each new game in Nintendo's various series usually has some drastic difference between it and the previous game. Yet for some reason nobody pays attention to that, instead they focus on the similar core mechanics and same characters and cry "rehash"

    I think that was a valid complaint about Twilight Princess, mainly.

    Feels Good Man on
  • GoombaGoomba __BANNED USERS regular
    edited April 2008
    Pata wrote: »
    I mean, for crying out loud, each new game in Nintendo's various series usually has some drastic difference between it and the previous game. Yet for some reason nobody pays attention to that, instead they focus on the similar core mechanics and same characters and cry "rehash"
    Link turning into a wolf was pretty cool, you got that right.

    Goomba on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • PataPata Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    Goomba wrote: »
    Pata wrote: »
    I mean, for crying out loud, each new game in Nintendo's various series usually has some drastic difference between it and the previous game. Yet for some reason nobody pays attention to that, instead they focus on the similar core mechanics and same characters and cry "rehash"
    Link turning into a wolf was pretty cool, you got that right.

    And the completely new dungeons and bosses and items...

    Pata on
    SRWWSig.pngEpisode 5: Mecha-World, Mecha-nisim, Mecha-beasts
  • tyrannustyrannus i am not fat Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    good to see pancake and goomba teaming up to try and get this shitfest on another roll

    tyrannus on
  • AccualtAccualt Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    I am going to play Company of Heroes now and pretend everyone who posted on page 25 and 26 are the nazis. :x

    As for the Halo sequels verse SSB sequels I think Halo gets some slack because of the single player storyline. Sure the gameplay is just as similar from Halo 2 to 3 as Melee is to Brawl but the story is all new. I do give Nintendo big props for the SSE portion of Brawl, I love that they put the time into that, I just wish they didn't do the goddamn maze. I hate the maze. Every bad video game cliché in one spot with that.

    Accualt on
  • tyrannustyrannus i am not fat Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    i hope a jagdpanzer runs your guys over

    tyrannus on
  • zakkielzakkiel Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    halo 2: released 2004.
    halo 3: released 2007.

    ssbm: released 2001.
    ssbb: released 2008.

    we're talking about a difference of four years here, dude.

    wow you dudes talked a lot while i was making this post. what i said was directed at fugitive

    SC1: Released 1998.

    SC2: Scheduled for 2008.

    And yet, no one whines about how SC2 looks to be virtually identical to SC1. Why? Because it would be goddamn stupid. Like whining about how different Monopoly editions don't come with radical innovations, or why the rules for football haven't changed in years. Comes a point when you've made a game whose essentials are just so good a fit that any major departure is going to make the game worse, at least among its core players.

    zakkiel on
    Account not recoverable. So long.
  • GoombaGoomba __BANNED USERS regular
    edited April 2008
    Pata wrote: »
    Goomba wrote: »
    Pata wrote: »
    I mean, for crying out loud, each new game in Nintendo's various series usually has some drastic difference between it and the previous game. Yet for some reason nobody pays attention to that, instead they focus on the similar core mechanics and same characters and cry "rehash"
    Link turning into a wolf was pretty cool, you got that right.

    And the completely new dungeons and bosses and items...
    Like the bow and arrow, hook-shot, iron boots, water tunic, an- Oh, you probably mean actual new items like that top that was used about 5 times or that other one for statutes that was used just as much. At least I think those were new.

    Goomba on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • PataPata Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    Accualt wrote: »
    I hate the maze. Every bad video game cliché in one spot with that.

    What do you mean?

    I honestly steeled myself for something horrible when I got to the Great Maze, but it wasn't bad at all.

    Pata on
    SRWWSig.pngEpisode 5: Mecha-World, Mecha-nisim, Mecha-beasts
  • OlivawOlivaw good name, isn't it? the foot of mt fujiRegistered User regular
    edited April 2008
    I just skimmed through this entire thread

    The only posts worth reading were Tube's

    Honestly, guys, what the fucking hell

    Olivaw on
    signature-deffo.jpg
    PSN ID : DetectiveOlivaw | TWITTER | STEAM ID | NEVER FORGET
  • zakkielzakkiel Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    Pata wrote: »
    I mean, for crying out loud, each new game in Nintendo's various series usually has some drastic difference between it and the previous game. Yet for some reason nobody pays attention to that, instead they focus on the similar core mechanics and same characters and cry "rehash"

    I think that was a valid complaint about Twilight Princess, mainly.

    Have to agree. IT was a fitting send-off, but I hope whoever it was (Miyamoto?) that said it would be the last of its kind was telling the truth. Time to shake that one up a bit.

    zakkiel on
    Account not recoverable. So long.
  • PataPata Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    Rentilius wrote: »
    good to see pancake and goomba teaming up to try and get this shitfest on another roll

    I have no idea why I replied to him.

    Every moronic post to come out of his mouth is trolling idiocy.

    Pata on
    SRWWSig.pngEpisode 5: Mecha-World, Mecha-nisim, Mecha-beasts
  • DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited April 2008
    zakkiel wrote: »
    halo 2: released 2004.
    halo 3: released 2007.

    ssbm: released 2001.
    ssbb: released 2008.

    we're talking about a difference of four years here, dude.

    wow you dudes talked a lot while i was making this post. what i said was directed at fugitive

    SC1: Released 1998.

    SC2: Scheduled for 2008.

    And yet, no one whines about how SC2 looks to be virtually identical to SC1. Why? Because it would be goddamn stupid. Like whining about how different Monopoly editions don't come with radical innovations, or why the rules for football haven't changed in years. Comes a point when you've made a game whose essentials are just so good a fit that any major departure is going to make the game worse, at least among its core players.
    no one? I actually don't give a toss about SC2 precisely because it just looks like the original with better graphics. I'm more excited for DoW2 due to the significant changes to game mechanics that I think look quite promising. Of course, you don't hear people saying this that often simply because we usually don't care enough to wander into a thread where people are gushing over it just to say we're not interested. What would be the point?

    Druhim on
    belruelotterav-1.jpg
  • PancakePancake Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    Druhim wrote: »
    What would be the point?

    To make crazy Blizzard fans angry?

    Pancake on
    wAgWt.jpg
  • DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited April 2008
    Pancake wrote: »
    Druhim wrote: »
    What would be the point?

    To make crazy Blizzard fans angry?
    most of us aren't as retarded and easily entertained as you

    Druhim on
    belruelotterav-1.jpg
  • AccualtAccualt Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    Pata wrote: »
    Accualt wrote: »
    I hate the maze. Every bad video game cliché in one spot with that.

    What do you mean?

    I honestly steeled myself for something horrible when I got to the Great Maze, but it wasn't bad at all.

    Repeated stages, easy to get lost, fighting evil versions of allies, aimless walking, stripped of your previous progress (unlocked characters to fight as), and refighting all the bosses you'd all ready beat. All old tricks used to artificially increase the length of the game. Old, vile tricks.

    Accualt on
  • JMC123JMC123 Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    So tell me, what games are you genuinely allowed to be a ravenous fan for/against and not receive shitstorms?

    JMC123 on
  • PancakePancake Registered User regular
    edited April 2008
    Druhim wrote: »
    Pancake wrote: »
    Druhim wrote: »
    What would be the point?

    To make crazy Blizzard fans angry?
    most of us aren't as retarded and easily entertained as you

    You're so mean. I can't believe you'd say that.

    Edit:
    JMC123 wrote: »
    So tell me, what games are you genuinely allowed to be a ravenous fan for/against and not receive shitstorms?

    BioWare games. Except you can't dislike them. Because then you're some sort of mongoloid.

    Edit2: Not to say anything bad about people of north Asian descent.

    Pancake on
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This discussion has been closed.