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So how can I get some info on a girl?
Spectral Swallow
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
Okay, theres this young lady that I am pretty attracted to, and we've kinda flirted back and forth, I don't know her name, but I frequent the place she works. Now unfortunately I don't really want to ask her out just cause that would be all kinds of weird if she were already dating somebody.
So, and I know this is going to sound like insane, how can I call up to her work and find out if she's single without sounding like a crazy stalker.
I've tried to deter the conversations in that direction before, to no avail.
And I know that(after rereading this) this entire thing sounds kinda crazy.
So, and I know this is going to sound like insane, how can I call up to her work and find out if she's single without sounding like a crazy stalker.
I've tried to deter the conversations in that direction before, to no avail.
And I know that(after rereading this) this entire thing sounds kinda crazy.
Spectral Swallow on
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You don't.
Talking to her is the only non-crazy stalker option here.
Basically, the only way it turns out "all kinds of weird" is if you spend most of the time with someone you like trying to trick them into divulging personal details. Just ask.
You've got to get your name stuck in her head
co-stanz-a
She'll accept and you will find out then, or she'll decline and you will find out now.
If the answer is yes just say "Oh, ok." and keep talking about what you were talking about until you can bring things to a more natural conclusion.
This strategy works wonders as more than once I've gotten later dates out of using it. It shows you are civil, easy to talk to, not afraid of rejection, and totally interested in her for more than just romantic intentions.
猿も木から落ちる
But then again, the only way to know is to ask...
But...I need to ask. How old are you? How old do you think she is?
I ask because I've had plenty of odd older men come in and hit on my female coworkers who then come to me and tell me how creeped out they are and ask if I can stand around them when said men were in the restaurant. Not to say you are the creepy guy in question, but it's something we should probably know about.
Try "Hey, would you like to grab a drink sometime?" Obviously, don't ask her out to the place she works at, duh. If she says no, say "Eh, cool, just thought I'd ask" and then don't sulk or act weird. If she says yes, say "Cool, how about tomorrow/next Friday," have a place and time in mind, and don't act too puppyish or freakishly eager. A date is not a marriage proposal.
The main thing I'm worried about is I'm misreading politeness with flirtiness. And like I said, I'm required to go there about once a week or so, so if I'm shot down it could be 10 kinds of awkward, especially with how girls talk.
But indeed, find a non-committal way to ask her out somewhere. Not so much a "will you go steady with me" kind of thing (of course), but like a "Hey, you want to get coffee somewhere?" The former makes it extremely well known what your intentions are... the latter gives her an opportunity to shoot you down (if she's going to) without ever actually knowing if you were even asking her out. And if she does agree to, you can certainly find out more by the way she behaves when you go wherever you go.
If you ask her out, and she says she's not available, that doesn't say anything bad about you. So get over yourself and ask her out. Or forget about. Don't pine. Or stalk.
It's a possibility - the hostess at one of my old jobs often had men asking her out and couldn't figure out why. As it turns out, she's very flirty - even when simply being polite. Suppose it's part of the business, make people comfortable so they spend more money.
If you do get shot down, well, it isn't the end of the world. It'll be a little awkward, but have a laugh, brush it off, maybe crack a joke to break the tension and all is well. She likely will gossip to the other employees one way or another, that's more or less inevitable. But really; what's the worst she's going to say? That guy that comes in that I talk to alot asked me out? You don't know these people and they don't know you, they'll probably laugh about it for all of an hour then move on. As long as you don't come across as pushy, needy or just plain weird, there really isn't any ammo for side gossip.
I'd suggest talking to her a little more and maybe learning her name first before asking her out though - as a rule of thumb, it's good to know a girls name before taking her out anywhere heh.
But if you like her, definitely go for it. It's one of those things you'll kick yourself for not doing later on.
Electronic composer for hire.
Get yourself a high grade blow dart.
Go to the store, next time she is talking to someone else you can pull out your blowdart and fire that tracking signal into her mouth, she should (90% of the time) swallow it.
Next follow her home and watch her that night, remember if you smoke, don't leave your butts on the ground, if the police find your stalking spot they can totally get your DNA on it.
This first night you should be able to find out basic things like when she goes to bed.
Once she goes to bed, steal her garbage and analyse it, you will be able to find out all kinds of things, how often she drinks, how often she eats in or how often she cooks, if she isn't very bright you should also be able to get her credit card numbers.
I mean jesus christ man up and talk to her.
Satans..... hints.....
Just write that you think she is cute and leave a link to your Facebook page if you have one. Anything more is stalker-ish.
have you ever even met a woman
DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES DO THIS.
Put yourself in her spot for a minute...Some guy knows what car I drive, OMG! Time to call cousin Lenny/Police.
Seriously. This is a fucking terrible, creepy idea.
If you take one thing from this whole thread, it should be sympathy that asking a girl out can be hard, but despite that do not "try and find out about her". Just ask her to a movie or something casual.
Yeah, sounds crazy but it worked, the girl called and we went out that night. Didn't work out as she had a kid and just got out of a marriage :shock:
I think my idea is better than putting her on the spot at her job. Plus giving a link to his social page shows that he is making himself non-anonymous, shows his interests and such.
OP, just talk to her, as others have said. She won't think it's weird or offensive, and it won't become awkward unless you go out of your way to make it so. Ask once, then if she says no, drop it. Don't ask again unless she gives you a really fucking obvious hint. As in, you ask her out tomorrow, she blushes and says "Oh, that's sweet, but I'm actually in a relationship!", then two weeks later she makes a point of telling you "I broke up with my boyfriend last week." Then you can ask again. Otherwise, don't.
Then you at least have some sort of association. Until then, you're just Anonymous Shopper #4 in the movie of her life.
Unless the guy does something creepy/stupid/embarassing, it's never awkward. They usually just mention they have boyfriends, and that's the end of it.
So just go for it.
Guys apotheos basically posted the best advice I've ever seen in a how to talk to girls thread. Follow his lead.
CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH
It also shows that he's more willing to stalk her than to talk to her. It's creepy.
I think your idea proves to her that you know what she drives, where she parks, when you can be there without her catching you (showing that you know roughly when SHE will be there) and that you have a sexual attraction to her.
The only girl who's going to follow that up as a totally sweet lead on an obviously normal, decent dude is the sort of girl who's desperate for any kind of romantic contact. IE, a lady with a kid fresh out of a bad marriage.
This is not a good way to meet normal women. It is a good way to get a police file started up on you, though.
CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH
That's truly terrible.
Do not follow LondonBridge's advice.