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Freedom Of Speech - My Story
G4meboy
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
WHERE IS FREEDOM OF SPEECH NOW?
Basically I wanted to tell my story to you all and see what you all thought. How it relates to free speech and all that.
The video version:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=37h8FbJOISk
The written version:
I've been a fan of nerdcore for awhile now. I graduated from high school and moved to Arizona State University two weeks ago to obtain a BA in theatre/film. Since I'm not big on drinking, I was ignored and I spent most of my time in my dorm room. Since I've loved the music, I decided to take Dr. Mario beats and write nerdcore raps over them. I made a 10 track, 20 minute demo CD, and put a note about it on my door.
At 11pm on Wednesday, August 29, someone on my floor came into my room and asked for the CD. I told them they may not like it because the recording was bad, and I played them a few songs, and they liked it, so I burnt them a copy, give it to them, and they leave. Keep in mind for the rest of this, that there was only this 1 copy made, and the time period.
So, they leave and I go to bed. At 2:40am on Thursday, August 30, I get woken up by pounding on my door. I decide to ignore it because I figured it was just some people coming back from a party. The knocking continues for 30min, so I finally get out of bed and look, and see that there are 2 police officers and a dorm administrator standing in the hallway. I think someone got drunk, so they're checking rooms, so I let them in. They tell me immediately they are concerned for my safety/the safety of others because of a track on the demo CD. See, I put a poem on the CD about bullying and the negative effects it has on people (like mc chris' "Geek"). Apparently the person I gave the CD to thought that it meant I was going to do those negative things expressed in the song. So the police search my room for weapons and/or drugs and interview me for 40 min, and decide I'm not a threat and am fine. The dorm administrator tells me that it's fine and the follow up will probably just be them calling me weekly to make sure things are ok.
So I'm just shocked but it seems like it's over, so they leave and I go back to sleep. Wake up, go to class, everything's fine. Then I go to my next class. A few minutes into the class, two more police officers show up and tell me they have to escort me off campus. Apparently the administration felt I was still a threat, so they interim suspended me, which means I was suspended until September 5th, and on that day, we'd have a hearing about my "code of conduct" on campus. They tell me that if I go back on campus, I will get arrested. I don't have a credit card, so I can't book a hotel or anything, the police won't let me go back to my dorm to get anything to survive, and are about to leave me when they realize that I'm 17 (thankfully it happened now, and not after my 18th birthday). So since I'm a minor, they escorted me to the police station because they technically weren't allowed to leave a minor alone.
I read over the paperwork given to me about my behavior. There is a list of about ten things the administration has against me. More than half are lies or stuff other students did to me (such as saying I wrote "666" on my dorm board which was a violent action, even though another student had done it and I erased it as soon as I saw it). The other stuff on the list was them misunderstanding the lyrics of the poem. They also said that since I listened to rap/metal music, it obviously influenced me to make me a violent person (even though they sell the same rap and metal bands in their music store). According to the paperwork, if the administration deems it necessary (which they acted pretty sure on), I could be expelled from school.
Keep in mind, this all happened in within 12 hours, and no one has talked to me / asked my side of the story. Also keep in mind that on that thursday morning, the administration at Virginia Tech stated that they should've suspended or acted on the student earlier to take away the threat, so the ASU administration was probably taking a clue to try and make an example out of me.
So my father has to fly from California to Arizona to pick me up and take me home (because I'm from CA and had nowhere to go in AZ). But his flight got delayed, so I ended up having to sit in the police station waiting room for seven and a half hours. I get taken home and discuss the issue with my parents. We find out that I can withdraw from the school, and get a full tuition/room/food refund if I withdraw by Friday, August 31. So we do, but now I have no college to go to, and my family is thousands of dollars in the hole because of having to fly back and forth between states and such.
Now my parents have to fly to Arizona, rent a car, pack up everything in my dorm, drive back to California, unpack, then drive back to the airport, drop off the car, and take our car back home. All by Sunday, September 2. Meanwhile I get to stay home because I'm still not allowed on campus.
So see what nerdcore rap / your music does to people! It's just aweful. Hah. I don't know. I think it's a crazy story and I hope you enjoyed it, and got somewhat pissed off about what happened. The thing is, all of this just proves what my song was about. Nerds are misunderstood and get screwed over time and time again.
On the plus side, I now have something to advertise my demo with. I'm officially the most controversial college rapper in the USA.
-g4meboy
Basically I wanted to tell my story to you all and see what you all thought. How it relates to free speech and all that.
The video version:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=37h8FbJOISk
The written version:
I've been a fan of nerdcore for awhile now. I graduated from high school and moved to Arizona State University two weeks ago to obtain a BA in theatre/film. Since I'm not big on drinking, I was ignored and I spent most of my time in my dorm room. Since I've loved the music, I decided to take Dr. Mario beats and write nerdcore raps over them. I made a 10 track, 20 minute demo CD, and put a note about it on my door.
At 11pm on Wednesday, August 29, someone on my floor came into my room and asked for the CD. I told them they may not like it because the recording was bad, and I played them a few songs, and they liked it, so I burnt them a copy, give it to them, and they leave. Keep in mind for the rest of this, that there was only this 1 copy made, and the time period.
So, they leave and I go to bed. At 2:40am on Thursday, August 30, I get woken up by pounding on my door. I decide to ignore it because I figured it was just some people coming back from a party. The knocking continues for 30min, so I finally get out of bed and look, and see that there are 2 police officers and a dorm administrator standing in the hallway. I think someone got drunk, so they're checking rooms, so I let them in. They tell me immediately they are concerned for my safety/the safety of others because of a track on the demo CD. See, I put a poem on the CD about bullying and the negative effects it has on people (like mc chris' "Geek"). Apparently the person I gave the CD to thought that it meant I was going to do those negative things expressed in the song. So the police search my room for weapons and/or drugs and interview me for 40 min, and decide I'm not a threat and am fine. The dorm administrator tells me that it's fine and the follow up will probably just be them calling me weekly to make sure things are ok.
So I'm just shocked but it seems like it's over, so they leave and I go back to sleep. Wake up, go to class, everything's fine. Then I go to my next class. A few minutes into the class, two more police officers show up and tell me they have to escort me off campus. Apparently the administration felt I was still a threat, so they interim suspended me, which means I was suspended until September 5th, and on that day, we'd have a hearing about my "code of conduct" on campus. They tell me that if I go back on campus, I will get arrested. I don't have a credit card, so I can't book a hotel or anything, the police won't let me go back to my dorm to get anything to survive, and are about to leave me when they realize that I'm 17 (thankfully it happened now, and not after my 18th birthday). So since I'm a minor, they escorted me to the police station because they technically weren't allowed to leave a minor alone.
I read over the paperwork given to me about my behavior. There is a list of about ten things the administration has against me. More than half are lies or stuff other students did to me (such as saying I wrote "666" on my dorm board which was a violent action, even though another student had done it and I erased it as soon as I saw it). The other stuff on the list was them misunderstanding the lyrics of the poem. They also said that since I listened to rap/metal music, it obviously influenced me to make me a violent person (even though they sell the same rap and metal bands in their music store). According to the paperwork, if the administration deems it necessary (which they acted pretty sure on), I could be expelled from school.
Keep in mind, this all happened in within 12 hours, and no one has talked to me / asked my side of the story. Also keep in mind that on that thursday morning, the administration at Virginia Tech stated that they should've suspended or acted on the student earlier to take away the threat, so the ASU administration was probably taking a clue to try and make an example out of me.
So my father has to fly from California to Arizona to pick me up and take me home (because I'm from CA and had nowhere to go in AZ). But his flight got delayed, so I ended up having to sit in the police station waiting room for seven and a half hours. I get taken home and discuss the issue with my parents. We find out that I can withdraw from the school, and get a full tuition/room/food refund if I withdraw by Friday, August 31. So we do, but now I have no college to go to, and my family is thousands of dollars in the hole because of having to fly back and forth between states and such.
Now my parents have to fly to Arizona, rent a car, pack up everything in my dorm, drive back to California, unpack, then drive back to the airport, drop off the car, and take our car back home. All by Sunday, September 2. Meanwhile I get to stay home because I'm still not allowed on campus.
So see what nerdcore rap / your music does to people! It's just aweful. Hah. I don't know. I think it's a crazy story and I hope you enjoyed it, and got somewhat pissed off about what happened. The thing is, all of this just proves what my song was about. Nerds are misunderstood and get screwed over time and time again.
On the plus side, I now have something to advertise my demo with. I'm officially the most controversial college rapper in the USA.
-g4meboy
G4meboy on
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When I'm not in school I live 'bout an hour east from the Bay Area. (ooh look how cryptic I am =P)
But yeah. I figured it was finally time to make my story public. I shouldn't have to go on hiding it. Spread the word and let people know how effed up it is.
AND LYRICS:
You wonder why I write nasty lyrics
You wonder what the brought me to this
All you need to do is look at yourself
And maybe then you'll find the truth
All the bullying and calling names
Always being the last choice in games
Always being told to shut the fuck up
Always being told to fuck the fuck off
Always being told to stop being a pussy
Always being told to pay for everybody
Always being told to step down again
Always being told I wasn't a man
Always being the odd one out
But getting bitched out when I pout
Apparently I never knew the plan
To make me feel like a lesser man
So I get told I'm emo-cake number two
But that's okay it sounded kind of cool
Well always being degraded
Never taking stands for what I did
And when I did I was an asshole
And then I'd be swallowed whole
By the fuckin hate and the fuckin drama
That everyone says I cause well nuh uh
My writing shows all my true thoughts
That's why they're so violent to get them out
You wonder why I haven't commited suicied
You wonder why I haven't pulled a Columbine
Well that's because my music makes me sane
Killing you in my dreams is all the same
Stop fucking around with me and maybe
Things will end up being less sleazy
But just lately I have realized
That they don't cut it, I mean my rhymes
I feel I'm gettin more violent all the time
Taking a baseball bat to my fences
Thinking I'm smashing in your faces
I'm sick of the disappointment I see all the time
I'm sick of being told I'll never get mine
I'm sick of people trying to shut me down
I'm sick of people trying to take my crown
I'm sick of having to act like a clown
Just to get the attention of our town
Y'all better be glad I don't own a gun
Y'all better be glad that I can't run
Y'all better be glad you took all my confidence
Y'all better be glad you took my prominence
Left me for nothing, left me for dead
Well I agree with what Milton said
"It is better to rule in Hell
Than it is to serve in Heaven"
And if you had just listened for one second ASU
Maybe then you would've found the truth
You're the exact reason I wrote this song
Why can't we all just get along
But you pushed me away and never asked my view
You thought I was too unsafe for you
Do I look like the kind of kid that'll go crazy
Do I look like I'm going to cause another VT
Of course not! I just listen to ICP
And try to emulate what I hear and what I see
So why don't you stop picking on me
Because truthfully and honestly
When I was sitting in that police car
I really wanted to go that far
I thought maybe I should just prove you right
And get the media on your smiling faces tonight
Yeah, I realize it was violent as hell, but I had written it a year earlier and the point of it was supposed to be that this violent music makes things alright. I wrote it when I was pissed off and included it in the CD because geeks go through trauma everyday.
http://www.myspace.com/g4meboy
Also -- your dates don't line up. Why are you giving us BS dates? Have you looked at a calendar recently? It's July, dude. Or are you saying this happened last year?
San Ramon / Pleasanton / Dublin area.
http://www.myspace.com/g4meboy
(1) Perhaps the punishments were unacceptable. Depending on how bad they were, you had the option of fighting this or not.
(2) Perhaps they were totally unjust. We're honestly too far removed from the situation to really make any kind of honest declaration or any kind of actual judgment.
(3) You made the decision to move on with your life. This is probably a good thing, as Arizona, as a state, is generally a shithole. Congrats for Goldwater, AZ, even diehard liberals have to respect that man, but that's the end of it. Oh, I also like Charles Barkley, even though he's more of a Sixer than a Sun.
So people overreacted to violent lyrics -- it's pretty de rigeur. Sorry you got caught up in all that. I hope, in the future, you'll be more skilled at sticking up for yourself and making the true intent of your actions known.
As for courts and for why it took a year for me to get this out, my parents didn't want to pursue action and get all the attention to it. After that though, I'm still upset about it and I still think it's a story that needs to be told. So yes, this is quite after the fact, but it's still something relevant and it's still something I think should be said.
http://www.myspace.com/g4meboy
Not suggesting that the school was justified, exactly. Just saying that what we get here is often only one side of the story.
Was that the 'girl that believed in leprechauns' story?
yes.
Wanted to go there, but didn't.
Yep.
And yeah I don't listen to ICP much anymore. I know they aren't the best band in the world, but as stated before, they've helped in certain situations. I do enjoy a good dose of sarcasm though, so thanks.
http://www.myspace.com/g4meboy
Also, was this before or after that shooting at the Virginia school? Because those sort of things tend to make everyone wacky.
No, it's just Southern Fried Nerdcore.
I will crunk you in the face.
The only reason I was hated in my dorm was because I didn't smoke weed or drink with anyone because I didn't agree with it. They were pissed off at me that I was an "outsider who didn't party." And yet when the police came to my door saying that my music was one of the strikes against me, the metalheads across the hall from me were blasting music that had hateful and violent lyrics in it. It was all a matter of perseption. Who spoke first, who had more on their side.
Coincidentally, the same morning I got the interim suspension, the admin from VT went on the news saying they had noticed signs beforehand and didn't do anything about it. If they had acted earlier it may not have happened. Another thing that'd make ASU go insane and mess with me.
I do understand that my intentions may seem kind of shady. This isn't about me trying to make people feel good about the situation. I'm not trying to make this a sob story or take it too lighthearted. I just am telling a story I think needs to be told. It's a hell of a story.
What I found interesting though is that I performed the same poem at open mics in Berkeley and got 6th place and at my new school, to which I got standing ovations and quite a few comments on how well written it was. There was absolutely no negative reaction.
One of the best things to come out of the situation was support from MC Lars. I sent him the written version of my story in September of last year, here was his response:
"Robbie,
Wow dude! What a story. Hip-hop has always been controversial, and especially when it pushes the buttons of administrations like that. But your tracks are tight and that's dope that you're doing the thing. The kid who went and complained the hall monitor was a little bitch!! He was offended by your creativity and ability to do something fresh.
I'm going to post a blog about your story. It needs to be heard. It sucks that you had to go to jail like that man.
I send you my best, and keep fighting the good fight!
MC Lars"
http://www.myspace.com/g4meboy
Considering dude had said he was seventeen when it happened, and that he had to withdraw by August 31st, it's a very good bet that this was his first offense.
Edit: Such as it was.
Imo, this is a terrible view to hold.
I've seen people kicked out for Airsoft guns, and for jokingly telling someone they were going to kill them. Frankly, it sucks... but, I think the odds of seeing anyone shoot up a hall at ASU are smaller because of it.
Well, that's why I feel somewhat sad that his parents didn't fight it (though I can understand why they didn't.) Schools do this bullshit as long as they can - it usually takes them losing money for them to realize that "hey, this might not be the best strategy."
Edit: As for your line about those odds, I think the guy on the c-note would disagree.
Agreed.
MWO: Adamski
Yep, same here.
I'm just saying colleges have it really difficult these days. And it's easier to just have an asanine, borderline criminal policy as a way to reduce the risk of someone going nuts. I don't think it's right... and, I can also tell you that if there is one thing ASU Res Life is scared of, it's the ACLU.