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So can Rachel Ray actually be trusted to create edible recipes
Harrier
The Star Spangled ManRegistered User regular
The Star Spangled ManRegistered User regular
I know she's considered by some to be the most annoying woman in the universe.
And I think it's Teefs or Pony or somebody who has a rather unsettling anecdote about seeing her in her backyard once.
But is the food she makes any good?
I ask this because I'm looking for a Tandoori Chicken recipe, and I just happen to have come across her take on it. Objectively, I want to consider it, but on the other hand, it's Rachel Ray, and largely thanks to this board, I'm somewhat wary. So I figured I'd present it for consideration.
Also, I guess we can talk about food and cooking in this thread, and maybe we can get about a page or so along before someone starts posting Nigella pictures.
And I think it's Teefs or Pony or somebody who has a rather unsettling anecdote about seeing her in her backyard once.
But is the food she makes any good?
I ask this because I'm looking for a Tandoori Chicken recipe, and I just happen to have come across her take on it. Objectively, I want to consider it, but on the other hand, it's Rachel Ray, and largely thanks to this board, I'm somewhat wary. So I figured I'd present it for consideration.
Also, I guess we can talk about food and cooking in this thread, and maybe we can get about a page or so along before someone starts posting Nigella pictures.
I don't wanna kill anybody. I don't like bullies. I don't care where they're from.
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also apparently I am the only person at my work who hates Rachael Ray
just guess which FN chef they hate
you will flip your shit
It's a nice enough town, with pines and cedars lining the road. The air is fresh, and the last yellow silt from pollen season lines the creek beds. An old general store advertises daily specials on medicine or cloth, and tired men in honest caps walk dogs that have real problems. Two women chat as they enter what is clearly a beloved hamburger restaurant.
I like where she lives; it is a good place. This is why I do not like that she lives there. It is as though she does not Get it. She tries much too hard to please. A good country person waits to be pleased. Poverty cannot afford to dance.
After some eavesdropping behind a newspaper I hear a local man mention where her house is to a new pizza delivery boy. I start the van and head there. The light is growing dim, and I have sulfured eggs to distract her dogs.
I make a few wrong turns, out on the foggy pine forest roads, but it isn't long before I know I've found the place. I ask you, what good country family has three matching PT Cruisers. Why would she need three. I know she is married, but it just seems terrible. It makes me angry. She should not make her husband drive a PT Cruiser. No matter who he is. (Although, I have to admit, my opinion on that will soon change.)
I park the van six miles down the road, to ward off suspicion, then sprint back to their property. As I had read, there are large dogs prowling about. I reach into my fanny sack and throw two sulfured eggs as far as I can from the house. The dogs hear the cracks and sprint away. Perfect. I've injected the eggs with Haxall's Pandemonium Chlorodyne.
Now it's time to get up and look in the windows. The first thing I see, unfortunately, is her short husband using the bathroom. Before I can duck away I learn the awful truth: he is sweating, and he has jazz butt. The window is open, so I am spared no detail, no matter how quickly I try to creep away. Oh god how awful, how awful to live with Rachael Ray. How awful to watch what happens. How awful to eat what happens.
Come on
I scanned the first five, that's standard SE protocol
at least twice
Do not say Alton Brown
$40 A Day is basically the worst/best show ever
She's so transparent whenever she doesn't like something. She'll only comment on how much there is
Also worst tipper in the world
Alton
fucking
Brown
it's on the first page
tell me it's Alton Brown and i will personally kill everyone at your work
edit:OOH MY GOD WHAT?
LIKE SERIOUSLY?
HOW DO YOU DO THAT?
My world is collapsing as I type this.
Such an evil thing to think. To say it out loud? It is just fucking wrong.
the people where I work all hate Alton Brown and like Rachael Ray
I told them I couldn't deal with their shit and took my lunch break
"too many facts and science and stuff"
barf
Good Eats is sooo good tho. How can anybody hate it? Those people have no brains.
people don't usually share brains you're right
i dislike bobby flay (fucking yankee) and paula dean (i swear i saw her stuff a turkey with oysters or something once)
Soon the pizza delivery boy pulls into view, but he stops a hundred yards down the road. He leaves a pizza box near a fencepost, picks up a rock, and removes what looks like cash. The husband does not look in his direction, but when he has heard the boy's engine fade away he sprints to the pie and ravenously consumes several slices. He then hides the box beneath large dried cedar branches, perhaps for later. It is a gamble, as animals may eat it, but it looks to me that he lives by playing at odds. He wipes wet leaves and pine needles on his mouth, on his tongue, to hide the smells.
Rachael steps out to the front porch and yells, "JAAAAHN? JOHN-BOY? YOU OUT THERE?"
The husband panics, and yells back, "I...I was chasing a rabbit! It looked like it was hurt!"
"Well, was it?"
"I guess not, Rach, 'cause he sure got away fast!"
"Get back in here! I just got an idea for Hobgoblin Turkey Gobblers! You know, kind of a Halloween thing!"
"Sounds awesome, Rach! What's...what's in it?"
"I'll figure that out later! Come in here and try the Smackers, and quit makin' me yell. You know I'm doin' twelve shows tomorrow!"
He whispers his reply: "Sure thing, Rach!"
"WHAAAAAAT?"
"Sorry, Rach! Be there in a sec!"
The dogs finally start to howl and convulse in the woods behind the house, so they run off to see what is the matter. I am disgusted with them both; I do not want to confront this terrible situation as much as I thought I did. I want to be gone, away from these two. It is all I can do to go into the house, make myself sick on a plate, and leave it by the stove. "Amateur hour," I know.
Not too long after that I am back in the van, headed for home. I am disappointed, and it takes me a good sixty hours to reach California. When I turn on the television, there is Rachael Ray, serving a meal of Astronaut Turkey Smackers. A telltale stain of iodine shows just past the cuff of a long shirt sleeve: she has been bitten by a crazed dog.
In a way, I have communicated with her, but I would not call it a conversation.
by robo thero
I ate a passionfruit yesterday.
Satans..... hints.....
will rachael ray get her boobies this year
DON'T GET ME STARTED ON THIS WOMAN
First tip in the Rachel Ray $40 a day thing? Limit what you order to the appetizers and soup portion of the menu. She always tries to make this seem less sad by going "they include a bowl for the soup, a spoon, and even some crackers! WOW!"
This is not the worst thing in the world, but if you are traveling in a new area you are probably doing a lot of footwork and it is important to make sure your body is getting the calories it needs to function properly. She also has this thing where she will order tap water because it is free. She might get a cup of tea if it is under a dollar, but even then it's pretty watery.
I remember one time they tried to comp her because she is Rachel Ray and she didn't include the price that it would have been otherwise. This is not a helpful travel tip for people on a budget.
I fully expect later seasons of this show will capture her spiraling descent into madness. It'll start off with something that seems unnecessarily cheap at first; maybe she will advise people to use a drinking fountain as a mid-day snack. Then she will randomly bring up that some countries eat things that we would find shocking, and that the recession we are currently facing has caused an increase in the number of stray cats.
There is a video on youtube that is just a compilation of every time she takes the tiniest bite and then goes "MMM". It sickens me how she will look over the cheapest part of the menu, choose the plainest item so she won't have to experience anything new, and then do a half-assed reaction when it doesn't wow her. Maybe if you ordered off a menu that didn't have a train-shaped map on the back side you could appreciate what the city has to offer?!
Then they had her on that food network star competition, and she's just screaming over the contestants in what I assume is some sort of plan to see if they can be the person to take the stage. But she is such a shrill bitch that even if a person does get assertive she says they are giving her attitude.
I would rather butter up Paula Deen than eat a single dish prepared by this vile woman.
Games: CoD4, Halo 3
food that will kill you, but you'll die happy
Or Nigella
Or Paual Dean
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1WxP6MGvO_s
I would let Alton Brown fuck me in the barnhole as long as he was explaining the science behind the procedure as he was doing it. And then I would make him bake me quiche or something.
Just set them all on fire.
Two sticks of butter in her cornbread muffin mix
She then took a finished muffin and buttered it up
Rock Band DLC | GW:OttW - arrcd | WLD - Thortar
but deemer's video has cemented this women in my head as filed under "holy fucknuts crazy"
I'm pretty glad I live in Texas, where we have plenty of Mexican food to balance all the butter.