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Eternity's Child is terrible, but the drama is hilarious
YaYa
Decent.Registered User regular
Decent.Registered User regular
So there's this indie game called Eternity's Child that's been in development for years and years and years. It's well known due to its very creative art style and such.
Pretty, right?
It's finally been released.
It is apparently fucking awful.
The jumping is broken, the animations are ridiculously stale and there's no level design to speak of.
Observe, the two Destructoid reviews and the subsequent hilarity that is Luc Bernard trying to defend his game.
http://www.destructoid.com/destructoid-review-eternity-s-child-97583.phtml#ext
My favourite quote so far:
So has anyone actually picked up this travesty yet?
Pretty, right?
It's finally been released.
It is apparently fucking awful.
The jumping is broken, the animations are ridiculously stale and there's no level design to speak of.
Observe, the two Destructoid reviews and the subsequent hilarity that is Luc Bernard trying to defend his game.
http://www.destructoid.com/destructoid-review-eternity-s-child-97583.phtml#ext
My favourite quote so far:
question, did you play with controller or keyboard?
because controller is unplayable
So has anyone actually picked up this travesty yet?
YaYa on
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Of 50 cents. Off of $4.99.
Thanks, but, no.
EDIT - That review was fucking hysterical: "In general, the controls are more loose than a five dollar hooker the morning after shore leave ends."
Also, I think a demo is coming out next week so people won't have to risk their $5 if they want to try it.
I haven't tried the game after the patch was released, but the game shouldn't have been released with broken controls in the first place.
Indie or big-house, the same rule is always true. Don't ship a broken game. They broke that rule, now they pay the price with bad press.
EDIT: Oh, so it was just that one guy who made the entire game then? Oops. There's his mistake. People are seldom good artists, programmers and game designers all at once. A little humility would've maybe had him stick to what he does best (obviously the art here) and hire competent people to do the other stuff.
In response to one guy making a game:
Everyday Shooter
edit: haha oh man reading comment section. golden stuff.
Final Fantasy XI -> Carbuncle - Samash
Agreed. 100%.
The good news is that Luc may have had a future in marketing up until he started commenting.
Final Fantasy XI -> Carbuncle - Samash
I suppose I should be happy, originally I was sad it moved. It was called the next big thing repeatedly.
Also from what I hear, the jump button works 66% of the time, all the time.
> turn on light
Good start to the day. Pity it's going to be the worst one of your life. The light is now on.
People like to get righteously indignant over things that they're not going to play. It justifies their position, kind of like the console wars.
on one hand dude made a terrible game and knew it but immediately pulls the "it's not my fault card"
on the other hand what Tube said
Yes, fuck him for defending something he has worked really hard at.
I haven't tried the game, but I read his comments and I don't think they in any way justifies the shitstorm that's being unleashed on him. Someone's down on the ground and the internet crowds in to kick him. Seriously, one tiny whiff of blood in the air and we're all over them, aren't we?
Who's "we"? I'm not the internet, are you?
While I think people are definitely being overly harsh on the guy, and it's sad that the first review of his first game is extremely negative, the way he responded in some of his comments was downright childish. I mean, it sucks that they didn't like his game but getting all bent out of shape because of what random commenters on Destructoid say? Of course they are going to be assholes, this is the internet. The best way to respond to that type of stuff is just not to respond at all. Hell, he even admitted to being drunk in one of the later comments (and he called Destructoid's staff unprofessional....)
to be honest they do seem like they came straight from 4chan a lot of the time
Destructoid loses hella credibility here
they've been blasting Luc in like two seperate unrelated articles on the front page
too far there guys
Internet assholery aside, I haven't been following this game's development (or had much interest in it) at all. An article here and there on Kotaku - it looked like a quirky 2D platformer with beautiful hand-drawn sprites. Wonky gameplay aside, what the review points out that I find simply unforgivable is bad animation.
Yes, the jump button only works 33% of the time and that's awful, but just as horrible is a game that looks beautiful in screenshots and terrible in motion. Which brings me back to Odin Sphere.
Man, I
Yes.
I imagine the only way you could have expectations of Destructoid's professionalism is if you either a) have never read Destructoid before, or b) aggressively agreed with all their previous antics.
Me too. Oh, and that guy over there. Plus the girl in the back.
I don't think anything about those two particular reviews sounded unprofessional, though. Definitely not as unprofessional as drunkenly responding to criticism of your game.
Ah hah! Everyone knows that there are no girls on the internet!
Awww. I guess I'll go back into hiding now.
Switch: 6200-8149-0919 / Wii U: maximumzero / 3DS: 0860-3352-3335 / eBay Shop
However, claiming an indie game to be your life's work just seems sorta silly. Just get a better team and go again. Though he might have bombed his own reputation in those replies there. I guess any publicity is good publicity, so if he releases something good next time, people will probably go "Surely not!" in a british accent and play it to see for themselves..
Almost everyone on Destructoid is acting wrongly.
That dude shouldn't have commented on the review, especially these stupid posts he made.
The other commenters should keep it to a level and just call him on his BS without jumping on a big "I dunno about that game BUT FUCK U DUDZ"
This reminds me of space giraffe where most people hate it but the creator insists that it's misunderstood or something.
Djiem: I think you are expecting way too much of internet commenters.
I have a video of luigi's dance on youtube and every single day I get an email notification that just says "gay". I somehow can't bring myself to turn it off.
Oh my god. NOW he deserves the "FUCK U" rage.