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Striking out on my own(kinda)
noir_blood
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
If anyone read my last thread, I had asked about the idea of moving in with my gf. So we have decided to go for it, under the idea that we each will have a separate bedroom(we're both weird about our privacy) and more importantly, this is a roommate situation first, not a preclude to getting married or anything like that.
So with that say, I come to the collective wisdom that is penny arcade for advice on A)living on your own for the first time and
Living with a roommate/gf. What mistakes did you make that I shouldn't? What little stuff should I buy that won't cross my mind until I needed?
Part of the living arrangement is that I'll be doing the cleaning, as she'll be paying a considerate amount more of the rent than I, so cleaning products you recommend, etc would be good. Also, cooking- Right now living with my aunt, I just let her buy all the groceries and I pay her at the end of the month and use whatever there is to cook. That has to change. Good, quick, cheap and healthy recipes would be appreciated.
So with that say, I come to the collective wisdom that is penny arcade for advice on A)living on your own for the first time and
Living with a roommate/gf. What mistakes did you make that I shouldn't? What little stuff should I buy that won't cross my mind until I needed?Part of the living arrangement is that I'll be doing the cleaning, as she'll be paying a considerate amount more of the rent than I, so cleaning products you recommend, etc would be good. Also, cooking- Right now living with my aunt, I just let her buy all the groceries and I pay her at the end of the month and use whatever there is to cook. That has to change. Good, quick, cheap and healthy recipes would be appreciated.
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Buy things when you need them, don't think you need to stock up before hand. Unless you live like thirty miles from a Target or something, it generally leaves you with more stuff and less space.
You'll find out pretty quickly what you need on a daily basis - as Improvolone said, there's not a whole lot you need to stock up on beforehand....Just keep in mind what you're about to run out of whenever you go shopping, pick it up as you need it.
Also going to second the opinion that trading chores doesn't work very well - as long as it doesn't end up with one person doing *everything*....if you see something that needs doing, do it. Letting things sit undone and/or dirty while arguing over whose turn it is will inevitably lead to trouble.
Being that you're staying in an ExtendedStay and not a "real" apartment, I don't think you have to worry about utilities and such? Something to keep in mind eventually though.
Also, find out if and for how much your possessions are covered in case of fire/flood/theft etc. If needed, get a renter's insurance policy started ASAP.
Besides the trading chores issue above, I think a lot of this was discussed in your first thread.
Do what you need to at the beginning, if sharing a bedroom really makes you both very uncomfortable - but either you or your gf are going to have to get past the whole separate bedrooms and sleeping habits/time thing, if you plan for your relationship to be of any serious length.
Combined with the above and what you mentioned in your first thread, this is rather confusing....She's your girlfriend, but the whole situation doesn't seem to show many romantic overtones at all, especially that you both feel you're going to have to "get away" from each other strongly enough to maintain separate bedrooms.
EDIT: Also confused why you're moving in with her at all, if (from what you said earlier) you're just going to more or less turn around and move in with your brother relatively soon. As Trowzilla mentioned below, if your gf doesn't already know this, you need to tell her ASAP.
Several past threads on this board covering that subject. Also - www.foodnetwork.com. TONS of recipes and advice there.
Heh, this makes me feel a bit better - I accidentally (badly) shrunk some pieces of clothing back when I first started living with my wife, so i'm not allowed to do the laundry sorting and starting the machine anymore
If you take the extra steps to remove clutter, it will make cleaning easier over time.
Also, no matter how much you love this girl, just be prepared to have your patience put to the ultimate test.
Weaboo List
1. Vaccum cleaner if you have carpet
2. Mop / Broom
3. Microwave unless this place already has one.
4. Iron
5. Pots and Pans. They sell sets of these for like 30 bucks and includes most of what you need to cook. If thats too much out of your budget then you can stop by local dollar stores or thrift stores to buy what you need.
6. Toaster
7. Blender
8. Hangers
9. Shower Caddies (1 for yours and 1 for hers)
10. Hangers
11. Dishes. Same advice as on the pots/pans
12. Towels and linens. One towel won't do
12. Tupperware
13. Coffee Maker
14. Notepad to leave notes on the fridge for each other. "I wuv you snookums"
15. First Aid Kit
When it comes to cleaning supplies: Clorox wipes or a roll of paper towels and a bottle of cleaner, clothes detergent, dish washing detergent, toilet bowl cleaner, and febreeze are items you should have one you first move in. The rest you'll know what you need as they come.
Fully aware of it.
This bears repeating.
You can probably get away skipping some of the stuff on there, but even if you're used to working around a kitchen, it's only a matter of time before you reach into dishwater and find a knife where you didn't expect it or grab a hot dish without thinking. My first experience cooking for myself without supervision ended in the emergency room because my first aid kit was two small bandaids and an empty tube of neosporin.
Be ready for that to possibly cause problems. Living together either pulls people closer or pushes them apart, and if she gets closer while you're getting ready to leave, she's likely to feel rather hurt by it.
It's probably best for you two to clean up your own messes, but it does mean you both have to actually do it. One person leaving papers or clothes or whatever around once can spiral pretty quickly, so if you each have your own living space and you tend to be a little disorganized, you might want to try to keep messes confined to your area.. because believe me, two people who are messy are not necessarily messy in the same way, and that can get really ugly really fast.