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Am I just being stupid? (Tattoos) UPDATE AGAIN/SOLVED!

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    i n c u b u si n c u b u s Registered User regular
    edited August 2008
    It is indeed a Fraternity not a sorority.

    i n c u b u s on
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    DehumanizedDehumanized Registered User regular
    edited August 2008
    Fraternity doesn't automatically imply dudes only
    wikipedia wrote:
    In most instances, they are limited to male membership, but that is not always the case, and there are mixed male and female, and even wholly female fraternities. Such as, for general fraternities, Grande Loge Mixte de France, Honorable Fraternity of Ancient Freemasons, Grande Loge Feminine de France, Order of the Eastern Star, for college and university fraternities, Alpha Phi International, Delta Delta Delta.


    JebusUD wrote:
    Absolutely any tatoo I suppose. Thats why you probably shouldmn't do somthing like a frat symbol because it is such a college thing. Its fixed in that time. I hope she still isnt in college at 98.

    Just plain music symbols are kind of a thing she will keep enjoying. Its not like anyone grows to dislike all music.

    Oh really?
    clockwork_orange_plakat2.jpg




    On topic: I'd say you're doing the right thing, OP. It's her decision, but hopefully you'll be able to convey your disappointment such that she really considers whether she wants frat symbols on her forever.

    Dehumanized on
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    Namel3ssNamel3ss Registered User regular
    edited August 2008
    All those latin roots in English class have only served to embarrass me!

    Oh well, these noodles are tasty.

    Namel3ss on
    May the wombat of happiness snuffle through your underbrush.
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    DelzhandDelzhand Hard to miss. Registered User regular
    edited August 2008
    Namel3ss wrote: »
    Wow, I can't believe this mistake has gone on for two pages.

    .

    .

    .
    Unless she has a penis its a. . .
    sorority

    Sigma Alpha Iota disagrees with you. My wife is SAI. Yes, we have this discussion every time she tells someone about it.

    Yes, she even had it with me when she joined. It's a common mistake.

    Delzhand on
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    EggyToastEggyToast Jersey CityRegistered User regular
    edited August 2008
    My wife (then girlfriend) went to Padre for spring break during college and got a tattoo on a whim. I was so pissed at her when she told me because 1.) her friend pressured her so she didn't think about it and 2.) she was drunk when she did it. I eventually realized that it's her body and as long as she's not doing anything harmful to herself, I really didn't have any right to be mad about something like a tattoo.

    On the flipside, if my wife got a tattoo on a whim I would be upset because I'm the one who has to look at it her entire life. It's not much different than getting a nose job or other permanent cosmetic change.

    But that may be why most people get tattoos in college or when they're single, and then stop or drop the idea once they're married -- you realize that things you do to yourself DO affect other people.


    As a good counterexample, there's a radio show in the DC area that a friend of mine listens to, and she was retelling a segment where they follow up on "failed dates." In this case, a nice girl called in and said she hooked up with this guy who was cute, smart, and they seemed to hit it off really well, and even fooled around that night. And then he didn't call back. So they got the guy on the radio, and asked why he didn't call back. He hemmed and hawed, trying to avoid the question, when he finally just said "OK, so we were about to have sex when I noticed that on her inner thigh she had 3 tattoos."

    "they were the names of her now-deceased pet cats." And it rightfully creeped him (and the radio hosts) out.

    EggyToast on
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    ceresceres When the last moon is cast over the last star of morning And the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, Moderator Mod Emeritus
    edited January 2020
    .

    ceres on
    And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
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    i n c u b u si n c u b u s Registered User regular
    edited August 2008
    UPDATE: So I went to see her yesterday and I got to get a good look at the change she wanted to have done. Its at the bottom of the treble clef where the tail curls up, she puts SAI in small letters. It is really small but I still think she should take the whole tattoo as a representation and not literally slap the letters on there. Brightside is that its pretty small so it'd be pretty easy to cover up with something or even have it removed without damaging the entire piece. Also I made the appointment at the shop for tuesday and spoke with a couple guys there (they all know me). I ran what she wanted by them and they like the design and agree with me about the letters. They do realize they do business in a college town and get this request alot but really try to stear them away from getting it. I hope they can convince her since they're you know the experts in this situation. I'll let you guys know how it went this Wednesday I guess, I might even post pics.

    i n c u b u s on
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    SpecularitySpecularity Registered User regular
    edited August 2008
    How are you going to feel if she ends up getting it as-is? Will you be able to smile and tell her it looks great? Or do you think you might struggle to not criticize her choice?

    Specularity on
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    DmanDman Registered User regular
    edited August 2008
    We don't ask him if he will smile and be happy for her, we Tell him he will smile and be happy for her. No namby panby contemplate your soul advice here boys.

    Dman on
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    OremLKOremLK Registered User regular
    edited August 2008
    Well that doesn't sound too bad really. I was kind of picturing it smack in the middle in big bold letters. Tell her you thought it looked better without them, but don't push the issue. It's her body. And yes for God's sake smile and be happy when she gets it, the last thing you want after getting a tattoo is your SO or friends or anyone acting like you made a mistake.

    OremLK on
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    SpecularitySpecularity Registered User regular
    edited August 2008
    Dman wrote: »
    We don't ask him if he will smile and be happy for her, we Tell him he will smile and be happy for her. No namby panby contemplate your soul advice here boys.

    I like the way you think.

    Specularity on
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    apotheosapotheos Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited August 2008
    EggyToast wrote: »
    On the flipside, if my wife got a tattoo on a whim I would be upset

    If my wife got a tattoo, I would have a reaction but not be "upset".

    Dealing with the occasional stupid decision is what I signed up for.

    (that is of course reciprocal)

    apotheos on


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    RoundBoyRoundBoy Registered User regular
    edited August 2008
    The best thing i have ever read in relation to tatoos that people feel are stupid years down the line: A tattoo is not a marking of something you want to show off forever, it shows *something* that was very relevant to the person at the time.

    Don't look at the letters as something dumb to reflect on when you are old, but something to signify what she is passionate about now.

    RoundBoy on
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    Houk the NamebringerHouk the Namebringer Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    edited August 2008
    RoundBoy wrote: »
    The best thing i have ever read in relation to tatoos that people feel are stupid years down the line: A tattoo is not a marking of something you want to show off forever, it shows *something* that was very relevant to the person at the time.

    Don't look at the letters as something dumb to reflect on when you are old, but something to signify what she is passionate about now.
    That's interesting, because that is like the exact opposite of why I would get a tattoo.

    Houk the Namebringer on
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    RoundBoyRoundBoy Registered User regular
    edited August 2008
    Houk wrote: »
    RoundBoy wrote: »
    The best thing i have ever read in relation to tatoos that people feel are stupid years down the line: A tattoo is not a marking of something you want to show off forever, it shows *something* that was very relevant to the person at the time.

    Don't look at the letters as something dumb to reflect on when you are old, but something to signify what she is passionate about now.
    That's interesting, because that is like the exact opposite of why I would get a tattoo.

    to be fair, there are exceptions.. because I don't think no matter how much Tweety bird means to you, you shouldn't get a large portrait of him across your chest.. but that looks stupid in any era, not just the future.

    RoundBoy on
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    PheezerPheezer Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited January 2020
    I don't know for a fact if Reconstructionism in general is cool with it, but I know a couple of Reconstructionist Jews who have tattoos, and got matching tattoos to commemorate their marriage.

    ceres on
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    JohnnyCacheJohnnyCache Starting Defense Place at the tableRegistered User regular
    edited August 2008
    huh. Well. I'll be damned. learn somepin' new every day.

    Incidentally, "fake concetration camp number" is a tattoo I have talked someone out of

    as is full sleeves of the Apollo and the Midnighter from a fan of The Authority that hadden't read very far into it yet.

    Who says I do no good?

    Is the issue here mainly that she wants the frat tattoo or that she messed with the design? Couldn't you redraw it for her with the frat letters integrated into the overall design better?

    JohnnyCache on
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    MisanthropicMisanthropic Registered User regular
    edited August 2008
    As someone with a lot of tattoos, I have to say one thing as shallow as it sounds:

    It is better to get a tattoo that looks good with no significance, than to get a tattoo that has lots of significance but looks like shit.

    Ideally you would get both. However, if a sacrifice must be made, err on the side of aesthetics. A tattoo in most situations isn't an in depth look into who you are as a person. They're a surface look at your philosophies, your interests, your history. The largest part of that is "how does this look on a person?" If it looks like shit on a person, people will judge you based on that, even if the tattoo does have some huge deeper meaning.

    What this comes down to is a sign at my tattoo shop of choice: A good tattoo ain't cheap, a cheap tattoo ain't good. Shop around, find the best artist in your area and be prepared to pay the premium and wait for a few months for them to have an open time slot to get the tattoo. The extra effort, money and time spent will show in the tattoo, no matter what the design is.

    EDIT: I am firmly in the NO FRAT LETTERS camp. You might as well get a boyfriend's/girlfriend's initials.

    Misanthropic on
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    ceresceres When the last moon is cast over the last star of morning And the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, Moderator Mod Emeritus
    edited January 2020
    .

    ceres on
    And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
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    i n c u b u si n c u b u s Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    UPDATE: So we went to get it done and she decided not to get the letters. What relief and the tattoo came out pretty good. She decided to have both the stars blue instead of blue and green. Crisis evaded and problem solved, thanks for all the talk and advice guys, H/A strikes again!

    Oh here is a pic of how it came out if you're curious:
    01220884767659000000117293_0.jpg

    i n c u b u s on
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    ceresceres When the last moon is cast over the last star of morning And the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, Moderator Mod Emeritus
    edited September 2008
    Very nice. :^:

    ceres on
    And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
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    JohnnyCacheJohnnyCache Starting Defense Place at the tableRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    ceres wrote: »
    Incidentally, "fake concetration camp number" is a tattoo I have talked someone out of

    So what you're saying is, there's somebody out there who seriously thought this was a good idea? Amazing.

    He meant it as a token of solidarity with his jewish homies.

    No lie.

    JohnnyCache on
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