As was foretold, we've added advertisements to the forums! If you have questions, or if you encounter any bugs, please visit this thread: https://forums.penny-arcade.com/discussion/240191/forum-advertisement-faq-and-reports-thread/

My boss just found out about my criminal record (and other tales of employment)

1101113151663

Posts

  • DrZiplockDrZiplock Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    At a bar, 20 minutes ago, I just learned that as of monday I'll very likely be let go.

    Monday is my one year aniversary with the company.

    I'm, aaahhh, without words right now. likely because I'm so god damned fucked i'm a wreck.

    This isn't because of my work, nope. but because the company just isn't making money. great. if you'll excuse me, I'm going to get rather snot filled and likely loaded.



    MOTHER FUCKING SON OF A BITCH.

    DrZiplock on
  • TheidarTheidar Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Damn that suck Dr. Z. what the fuck man.

    Theidar on
    Gamertag: Theidar
    Wii Friend Code: 0072 4984 2399 2126
    PSN ID : Theidar
    Facebook
    Behold the annhilation of the extraterrestrial and the rise of the machines.
    Hail Satan!
    WISHLIST
  • DrZiplockDrZiplock Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Yea, I don't know. This is from the former prez of the company who is still a partner. He's always liked me, and felt that this was a good thing to let me know.

    Nothing of the fact that yea...this MAY just fuck up my evening. I appreciate the heads up, but WHAT THE FUCK. The kicker? He could be wrong. Talk about cluster fucking a guys brain pan.

    DrZiplock on
  • FalloutFallout GIRL'S DAY WAS PRETTY GOOD WHILE THEY LASTEDRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Oden wrote: »
    Fallout wrote: »
    Oden wrote: »
    didn't you work at a supermarket

    me?

    yeah I remember once you told this story about this bum who came in and bought a forty every night then one day he turned into a successful scientist who drank forties

    also ascot at my job I have to wear an apron, it sucks cause at the end of every shift it gets smelly and covered in food and juice pulp

    I worked at a liquor store yeah

    and heh yeah, that dude still comes around. his crippling addiction to bottom-of-the-barrel vodka has rendered him almost unable to walk from his car to the store

    Fallout on
    xcomsig.png
  • TheidarTheidar Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Oh shit he could be wrong that makes it even worse.

    Fuck me man that is horrible.

    Theidar on
    Gamertag: Theidar
    Wii Friend Code: 0072 4984 2399 2126
    PSN ID : Theidar
    Facebook
    Behold the annhilation of the extraterrestrial and the rise of the machines.
    Hail Satan!
    WISHLIST
  • lostwordslostwords Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    D: dang drzip that truly does suck balls. e-hugs dude

    lostwords on
    rat.jpg tumbler? steam/ps3 thingie: lostwords Amazon Wishlist!
  • DefenderDefender Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    DrZiplock wrote: »
    At a bar, 20 minutes ago, I just learned that as of monday I'll very likely be let go.

    Monday is my one year aniversary with the company.

    I'm, aaahhh, without words right now. likely because I'm so god damned fucked i'm a wreck.

    This isn't because of my work, nope. but because the company just isn't making money. great. if you'll excuse me, I'm going to get rather snot filled and likely loaded.



    MOTHER FUCKING SON OF A BITCH.

    I have been laid off immediately after getting a raise/promotion/extremely positive review twice. And those two events happened less than 12 months apart. Man up and deal with shit sober instead of running away. Also, since you are unemployed I am assuming you are receiving welfare and using it on crack. Get a job, you goddamn bum!

    Defender on
  • TrillianTrillian Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I don't work. I should probably get on that.
    I'm tempted not to, since I just got my $1608.52 tax return yesterday.
    Fuck yeah early birthday present!

    Trillian on

    They cast a shadow like a sundial in the morning light. It was half past 10.
  • Indie WinterIndie Winter die Krähe Rudi Hurzlmeier (German, b. 1952)Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Defender wrote: »
    DrZiplock wrote: »
    At a bar, 20 minutes ago, I just learned that as of monday I'll very likely be let go.

    Monday is my one year aniversary with the company.

    I'm, aaahhh, without words right now. likely because I'm so god damned fucked i'm a wreck.

    This isn't because of my work, nope. but because the company just isn't making money. great. if you'll excuse me, I'm going to get rather snot filled and likely loaded.



    MOTHER FUCKING SON OF A BITCH.

    I have been laid off immediately after getting a raise/promotion/extremely positive review twice. And those two events happened less than 12 months apart. Man up and deal with shit sober instead of running away. Also, since you are unemployed I am assuming you are receiving welfare and using it on crack. Get a job, you goddamn bum!

    or

    and this is important

    you could burn the damn place down

    because Defender

    while your point is valid

    it's also true that his employers are enormous dicks

    Indie Winter on
    wY6K6Jb.gif
  • NucshNucsh Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Trillian wrote: »
    I don't work. I should probably get on that.
    I'm tempted not to, since I just got my $1608.52 tax return yesterday.
    Fuck yeah early birthday present!

    I have a $12k loan refund coming back to me soon because my school charged me too much

    h5 for extra money!

    Nucsh on
    [SIGPIC]GIANT ENEMY BEAR[/SIGPIC]
  • cheshirecheshire Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I work for a loan company right now.

    I had a terrible day though cause the other person who does the same job I do got fired today so I had to do all her work plus mine and was crazy busy.

    I was so glad to go home. I think I'm gonna go cook something so I can relax.

    cheshire on
    She was never meant to be a common creature
    Extraordinary takes time
  • DrZiplockDrZiplock Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Defender wrote: »
    DrZiplock wrote: »
    At a bar, 20 minutes ago, I just learned that as of monday I'll very likely be let go.

    Monday is my one year aniversary with the company.

    I'm, aaahhh, without words right now. likely because I'm so god damned fucked i'm a wreck.

    This isn't because of my work, nope. but because the company just isn't making money. great. if you'll excuse me, I'm going to get rather snot filled and likely loaded.



    MOTHER FUCKING SON OF A BITCH.

    I have been laid off immediately after getting a raise/promotion/extremely positive review twice. And those two events happened less than 12 months apart. Man up and deal with shit sober instead of running away. Also, since you are unemployed I am assuming you are receiving welfare and using it on crack. Get a job, you goddamn bum!

    or

    and this is important

    you could burn the damn place down

    because Defender

    while your point is valid

    it's also true that his employers are enormous dicks

    They aren't that enormous of dicks...for I'm not the only one on "the list" and why would i want them to get the insurance money for the building going up?

    The situation is just rather shitty.

    I'm actually rather sober, thanks defender, though...if I get welfare, crack for everyone! Calls have already gone out for replacement gigs. A few have commented that they won't let me be without employment long. It's just a rather shitty situation is all I'm saying.

    Defender, would it help your mood to go suck off a kettleball? Cause, I'm thinking that they miss you.



    <3

    DrZiplock on
  • DrZiplockDrZiplock Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    lostwords wrote: »
    D: dang drzip that truly does suck balls. e-hugs dude

    e-hug my ass, I'll see you next week you beautiful bitch.

    DrZiplock on
  • Centipede DamascusCentipede Damascus Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Today at work I was looking out the window and I was suddenly struck by an intense desire to bust out of there and run until I couldn't anymore.

    Unfortunately, my brain overruled it and the desire died slowly, whimpering as it went.

    Centipede Damascus on
  • sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    DrZiplock wrote: »
    lostwords wrote: »
    D: dang drzip that truly does suck balls. e-hugs dude

    e-hug my ass, I'll see you next week you beautiful bitch.

    You should do that bit from the Bible Sam L.'s character from Pulp Fiction like in the cafeteria or something and then just walk out without saying a word.

    sarukun on
  • DefenderDefender Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Defender wrote: »
    DrZiplock wrote: »
    At a bar, 20 minutes ago, I just learned that as of monday I'll very likely be let go.

    Monday is my one year aniversary with the company.

    I'm, aaahhh, without words right now. likely because I'm so god damned fucked i'm a wreck.

    This isn't because of my work, nope. but because the company just isn't making money. great. if you'll excuse me, I'm going to get rather snot filled and likely loaded.



    MOTHER FUCKING SON OF A BITCH.

    I have been laid off immediately after getting a raise/promotion/extremely positive review twice. And those two events happened less than 12 months apart. Man up and deal with shit sober instead of running away. Also, since you are unemployed I am assuming you are receiving welfare and using it on crack. Get a job, you goddamn bum!

    or

    and this is important

    you could burn the damn place down

    because Defender

    while your point is valid

    it's also true that his employers are enormous dicks

    Did I miss something? What I see here is that he's being laid off because his company isn't making money. That's not really the same as the company being a bunch of dicks; if you don't have money coming in, you have to lay people off.

    Defender on
  • DefenderDefender Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    DrZiplock wrote: »
    Defender wrote: »
    DrZiplock wrote: »
    At a bar, 20 minutes ago, I just learned that as of monday I'll very likely be let go.

    Monday is my one year aniversary with the company.

    I'm, aaahhh, without words right now. likely because I'm so god damned fucked i'm a wreck.

    This isn't because of my work, nope. but because the company just isn't making money. great. if you'll excuse me, I'm going to get rather snot filled and likely loaded.



    MOTHER FUCKING SON OF A BITCH.

    I have been laid off immediately after getting a raise/promotion/extremely positive review twice. And those two events happened less than 12 months apart. Man up and deal with shit sober instead of running away. Also, since you are unemployed I am assuming you are receiving welfare and using it on crack. Get a job, you goddamn bum!

    or

    and this is important

    you could burn the damn place down

    because Defender

    while your point is valid

    it's also true that his employers are enormous dicks

    They aren't that enormous of dicks...for I'm not the only one on "the list" and why would i want them to get the insurance money for the building going up?

    The situation is just rather shitty.

    I'm actually rather sober, thanks defender, though...if I get welfare, crack for everyone! Calls have already gone out for replacement gigs. A few have commented that they won't let me be without employment long. It's just a rather shitty situation is all I'm saying.

    Defender, would it help your mood to go suck off a kettleball? Cause, I'm thinking that they miss you.



    <3

    "Suck off a kettleball." Really.

    What are you even trying to do?

    Defender on
  • BucketmanBucketman Call me SkraggRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Defender wrote: »
    DrZiplock wrote: »
    Defender wrote: »
    DrZiplock wrote: »
    At a bar, 20 minutes ago, I just learned that as of monday I'll very likely be let go.

    Monday is my one year aniversary with the company.

    I'm, aaahhh, without words right now. likely because I'm so god damned fucked i'm a wreck.

    This isn't because of my work, nope. but because the company just isn't making money. great. if you'll excuse me, I'm going to get rather snot filled and likely loaded.



    MOTHER FUCKING SON OF A BITCH.

    I have been laid off immediately after getting a raise/promotion/extremely positive review twice. And those two events happened less than 12 months apart. Man up and deal with shit sober instead of running away. Also, since you are unemployed I am assuming you are receiving welfare and using it on crack. Get a job, you goddamn bum!

    or

    and this is important

    you could burn the damn place down

    because Defender

    while your point is valid

    it's also true that his employers are enormous dicks

    They aren't that enormous of dicks...for I'm not the only one on "the list" and why would i want them to get the insurance money for the building going up?

    The situation is just rather shitty.

    I'm actually rather sober, thanks defender, though...if I get welfare, crack for everyone! Calls have already gone out for replacement gigs. A few have commented that they won't let me be without employment long. It's just a rather shitty situation is all I'm saying.

    Defender, would it help your mood to go suck off a kettleball? Cause, I'm thinking that they miss you.



    <3

    "Suck off a kettleball." Really.

    What are you even trying to do?

    Well see he has a Kettleball fetish and its really hard to find any new and original stuff on the net....

    Bucketman on
  • FizFiz Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Great performance related thing happened today.

    Won a music competition scholarship in the Spring ($1000 for second place, nice). They had asked me about a month ago if I would be willing to participate in a benefit concert to help raise money for next year's little competition. Said yes since I am actually eligible to win it once more and I want to foster some good-will. Today they called me to ask for my email so they could send me more information about the event.

    The email was just them saying "thank you for agreeing to participate :)". Love these people

    Fiz on
    juggcat.jpg
  • DefenderDefender Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Bucketman wrote: »
    Defender wrote: »
    DrZiplock wrote: »
    Defender wrote: »
    DrZiplock wrote: »
    At a bar, 20 minutes ago, I just learned that as of monday I'll very likely be let go.

    Monday is my one year aniversary with the company.

    I'm, aaahhh, without words right now. likely because I'm so god damned fucked i'm a wreck.

    This isn't because of my work, nope. but because the company just isn't making money. great. if you'll excuse me, I'm going to get rather snot filled and likely loaded.



    MOTHER FUCKING SON OF A BITCH.

    I have been laid off immediately after getting a raise/promotion/extremely positive review twice. And those two events happened less than 12 months apart. Man up and deal with shit sober instead of running away. Also, since you are unemployed I am assuming you are receiving welfare and using it on crack. Get a job, you goddamn bum!

    or

    and this is important

    you could burn the damn place down

    because Defender

    while your point is valid

    it's also true that his employers are enormous dicks

    They aren't that enormous of dicks...for I'm not the only one on "the list" and why would i want them to get the insurance money for the building going up?

    The situation is just rather shitty.

    I'm actually rather sober, thanks defender, though...if I get welfare, crack for everyone! Calls have already gone out for replacement gigs. A few have commented that they won't let me be without employment long. It's just a rather shitty situation is all I'm saying.

    Defender, would it help your mood to go suck off a kettleball? Cause, I'm thinking that they miss you.



    <3

    "Suck off a kettleball." Really.

    What are you even trying to do?

    Well see he has a Kettleball fetish and its really hard to find any new and original stuff on the net....

    Yes I mean they're called kettlebells, but even ignoring that, uh...I think this is what the kids are calling "made of fail" or something.

    Defender on
  • DrZiplockDrZiplock Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Nothing more than a lame shot for being called a god damned bum, which i don't think that I've ever shown myself to be. Carry on.

    DrZiplock on
  • harvestharvest By birthright, a stupendous badass.Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I just want to cry a little here, since I can.

    I can't work because of these mental health problems I have. Washington has a Department of Vocational Rehabilitation that I've been working with, but it turns out that the agents there have no contacts, no placement prospects, and their "advice" has boiled down to "find a job you can handle doing."

    I'm 27 and I live with my parents because I'm fucking mental.

    harvest on
    B6yM5w2.gif
  • BucketmanBucketman Call me SkraggRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    harvest wrote: »
    I just want to cry a little here, since I can.

    I can't work because of these mental health problems I have. Washington has a Department of Vocational Rehabilitation that I've been working with, but it turns out that the agents there have no contacts, no placement prospects, and their "advice" has boiled down to "find a job you can handle doing."

    I'm 27 and I live with my parents because I'm fucking mental.

    Become a telemarketer? Possibly get some meds.

    Bucketman on
  • harvestharvest By birthright, a stupendous badass.Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Bucketman wrote: »
    harvest wrote: »
    I just want to cry a little here, since I can.

    I can't work because of these mental health problems I have. Washington has a Department of Vocational Rehabilitation that I've been working with, but it turns out that the agents there have no contacts, no placement prospects, and their "advice" has boiled down to "find a job you can handle doing."

    I'm 27 and I live with my parents because I'm fucking mental.

    Become a telemarketer? Possibly get some meds.

    Oh jesus christ telemarketing is like my antithesis. Anathema.

    Work-at-home proofreader or something is more my style. Librarian was the #1 result after all the tests and survey results came in.

    The meds I'm on help and the psychotherapy is ongoing.

    harvest on
    B6yM5w2.gif
  • FizFiz Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I did my first rehearsal tonight with the Lyric Opera people. Kind of intimidating since I had worked with pretty much every person there as chorus members with another Opera House, and now I was coming in as a principal character for this show.

    Lotsa fun though. One of the guys I find really hot was there, being hot and all.

    The rest of the guys are not hot at all :|

    Fiz on
    juggcat.jpg
  • JansonJanson Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    MikeRyu wrote: »
    Janson wrote: »
    Oh man, dogs

    My parents' dogs are such clumsy creatures

    They're always banging into things and people but don't seem to care

    Their favourite place to nap is under the dinner table (dropped scraps + we get to rub their bellies with our feet when we're sitting down), all tangled up with the table and chair legs. So many paws have accidentally been trodden on

    Lara likes to sleep on shoes. She'll pick out four or five of the pointiest, hardest shoes and plonk herself down on them

    Both dogs wag with their entire bodies. Wag-crash-wag-crash as they manoeuvre in and out of the furniture

    Are they labs?

    My dog does this. it's especially funny when she hits the cats in the face.
    Close! They are flatcoat retrievers.

    Really, really handsome breed by the way. They're gorgeous looking dogs.

    Yeah, my parents have a very little cat and he is always being accidentally hit by those dogs. They worship that cat though and always try to wash him as he walks past.

    Janson on
  • MikeRyuMikeRyu Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Janson wrote: »
    MikeRyu wrote: »
    Janson wrote: »
    Oh man, dogs

    My parents' dogs are such clumsy creatures

    They're always banging into things and people but don't seem to care

    Their favourite place to nap is under the dinner table (dropped scraps + we get to rub their bellies with our feet when we're sitting down), all tangled up with the table and chair legs. So many paws have accidentally been trodden on

    Lara likes to sleep on shoes. She'll pick out four or five of the pointiest, hardest shoes and plonk herself down on them

    Both dogs wag with their entire bodies. Wag-crash-wag-crash as they manoeuvre in and out of the furniture

    Are they labs?

    My dog does this. it's especially funny when she hits the cats in the face.
    Close! They are flatcoat retrievers.

    Really, really handsome breed by the way. They're gorgeous looking dogs.

    Yeah, my parents have a very little cat and he is always being accidentally hit by those dogs. They worship that cat though and always try to wash him as he walks past.

    Awww. It's other way around here, one of our cats tries to groom the dog now and then. At least they get on.

    MikeRyu on
    Ranmasig5.png
  • Zombies Tossed My Salad!Zombies Tossed My Salad! Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Boy, retail is fun work

    Especially when you work in second-hand retail

    Add that on top of the fact that our store is right on the edge of the bad part of town and you a recipe for fun!

    I think a good 85% of the money we give out goes straight to drugs and alcohol.

    And a good 70% of our customers don't even speak english,

    Zombies Tossed My Salad! on
  • ascotascot Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Bored of being unemployed now -_-

    ascot on
  • Zombies Tossed My Salad!Zombies Tossed My Salad! Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Get a job you hippie

    Zombies Tossed My Salad! on
  • MikeRyuMikeRyu Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Get a job ya bum!

    Which is funny because I am the bum.

    MikeRyu on
    Ranmasig5.png
  • ZombotZombot Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I delivered to a movie set the other night. $507 order. Filled my car up with pizzas and calzones.
    My windows were all fogged up and I was sweating.
    Food was supposed to be at the set at 9:30. Didn't come out till 9:36.
    Takes me ten minutes to get to the place because they had all the streets blocked off, and I had to keep pulling over to let the trucks and vans get by.
    This one bitch complains that the pizzas weren't labeled which is an honest concern since there were like 30 of them. She tells me to tell my people that late and non-labeled pizzas do not fly with her people.
    Tipped me $28.
    On the plus side, I saw Drew Barrymoore and I'm not bragging or anything but she smiled at me and totally wanted my dick.

    Zombot on
  • Sara LynnSara Lynn I can handle myself. Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I just had a dream that I called off this morning

    and then I woke up

    and now I gotta go to work

    so freaking tired, and I have classes all day today

    Sara Lynn on
  • The Black HunterThe Black Hunter The key is a minimum of compromise, and a simple, unimpeachable reason to existRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    You didn't put in the effort Zombot

    You are a failure

    The Black Hunter on
  • bsjezzbsjezz Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Boy, retail is fun work

    Especially when you work in second-hand retail

    Add that on top of the fact that our store is right on the edge of the bad part of town and you a recipe for fun!

    I think a good 85% of the money we give out goes straight to drugs and alcohol.

    And a good 70% of our customers don't even speak english,

    i work in retail and i basically sell tubes of paint to swedish fashion design students

    bsjezz on
    sC4Q4nq.jpg
  • Sara LynnSara Lynn I can handle myself. Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    ok nevermind I just called off like 10mins before my shift

    I'm too tired and I have classes til like 8pm fuck Starbucks

    Sara Lynn on
  • MikeRyuMikeRyu Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Yeah! Fight the man!!

    MikeRyu on
    Ranmasig5.png
  • BigDesBigDes Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I am snapping my fingers by the side of my head to indicate my approval with this course of action.

    BigDes on
    steam_sig.png
  • CrackedLensCrackedLens Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    im actually kind of in love with starbucks at the moment

    they gave me 250 bucks to help sponsor my softball team

    CrackedLens on
    XBoxLive Gamertag: ZombieKyle Secret Satan Wishlist
  • ascotascot Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Pfft, you people

    ascot on
This discussion has been closed.