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My boss just found out about my criminal record (and other tales of employment)

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Posts

  • DrZiplockDrZiplock Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    argh i don't have time to do this right now damn you ziplock

    I'll wait for you.



    Always.

    DrZiplock on
  • IskanderIskander Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Man today we're getting fancy new furniture at the office and one of the packers is this greasy Russian dude who's constantly making lewd comments about our office ladies in Russian.

    He doesn't know that I understand what he's saying and I am debating whether to call him on it or not because a. he's being rude but b. he's also saying things that are very very true.

    Iskander on
  • MysstMysst King Monkey of Hedonism IslandRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Agree with him in Russian and then have a big russian laugh followed by a steam.

    Mysst on
    ikbUJdU.jpg
  • DrZiplockDrZiplock Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Call him out!

    Be the hero!

    Get laid!

    DrZiplock on
  • bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Call him a penis jockey in Russian. You can take him.

    bowen on
    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
  • MikeRyuMikeRyu Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Start saying lewd things about him in Russian.

    MikeRyu on
    Ranmasig5.png
  • Centipede DamascusCentipede Damascus Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Mysst wrote: »
    Agree with him in Russian and then have a big russian laugh followed by a steam.

    And then a trip to the bar to sing Russian drinking songs while clutching giant mugs of beer.

    Centipede Damascus on
  • JansonJanson Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    From your perspective? I'd probably follow Mysst's advice. Just start laughing at/with him.

    From the ladies' perspective, well, even if they don't understand that they're being insulted they're probably frustrated that he can't understand them, so they'd probably appreciate you piping up.

    Janson on
  • MikeRyuMikeRyu Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Yeah just laugh along with him, slip some vodka in his coffee and start dancing.

    MikeRyu on
    Ranmasig5.png
  • JansonJanson Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Last week of work woo!

    I never have to deal with timesheets again

    ...:cry:

    Janson on
  • RuckusRuckus Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Janson wrote: »
    Last week of work woo!

    I never have to deal with timesheets again

    ...:cry:

    Uh, we have those here too.

    Ruckus on
  • FellhandFellhand Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Janson wrote: »
    Last week of work woo!

    I never have to deal with timesheets again

    ...:cry:

    Same here except for the cry.

    Fellhand on
  • Centipede DamascusCentipede Damascus Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    all my time recording is handled by computer

    although that system has gone down a couple times over the years and we had to use timesheets

    Centipede Damascus on
  • JansonJanson Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Ruckus wrote: »
    Janson wrote: »
    Last week of work woo!

    I never have to deal with timesheets again

    ...:cry:

    Uh, we have those here too.
    Well, this company's timesheets.

    Janson on
  • RuckusRuckus Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Janson wrote: »
    Ruckus wrote: »
    Janson wrote: »
    Last week of work woo!

    I never have to deal with timesheets again

    ...:cry:

    Uh, we have those here too.
    Well, this company's timesheets.

    Are they rediculous British timesheets, which require pi and the carrying of 1's?

    Ruckus on
  • JansonJanson Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    No but they probably spell ridiculous correctly

    Janson on
  • Centipede DamascusCentipede Damascus Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    British timesheets all must be filled out according to the Queen's Time, defined as starting when the Queen wakes up and changing to negative numbers when she retires. This obviously varies day by day and so workers must consult the Buckingham Palace records, which are freely available in an archival basement at their local town hall.

    Centipede Damascus on
  • JansonJanson Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I mean I'm responsible for entering all the timesheets into our database and it's my least favourite job

    I may never have that responsibility again.

    Janson on
  • RuckusRuckus Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    If the word ridiculous shows up on my timesheet it's usually not a good thing.

    Ruckus on
  • JoonJoon Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    It apparently takes weeks for someone to look at my transcript, see that I took a few units over the summer, and then hit the graduation button. I need my dang degree awarded but it's a lot of bureaucratic bullshit dealing with the university. I hope when they solicit for donations in a few years, they have a nice return envelop ready to go so I can tell them to go rot in the depths of hell.

    Joon on
    bartsig.png
  • MikeRyuMikeRyu Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    This is why my choice to have an imaginary degree works much better. I don't have to deal with that sort of thing.

    MikeRyu on
    Ranmasig5.png
  • JoonJoon Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    MikeRyu wrote: »
    This is why my choice to have an imaginary degree works much better. I don't have to deal with that sort of thing.

    -So do I just send you guys my transcript after I'm done with those summer classes or what?
    -Oh, no, you just tell us ahead of time the college and the classes you'll be taking. We'll get the information we need.
    -Okay, great!

    *2 months later*

    -Okay, so I'm all done. Is there anything left to do?
    -Yeah, we just need you to tell them to send us your transcript.
    -But... I explicitly asked that. You said I wouldn't have to.
    -Haha, nuh uh. Man, I hope you didn't take too many units.
    -What do you mean? I needed 8 and I took 9.
    -Well, yeah... You take 9 of their units. We might say you took 12 which would mean you took more than you should have and you'll have to petition to graduate.
    -But I took 9.
    -We might go ahead and give you 12.

    Joon on
    bartsig.png
  • MikeRyuMikeRyu Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Why would they give you twelve? Is this something they do? They don't even seem to know. Do they spin a wheel to decide?

    MikeRyu on
    Ranmasig5.png
  • MysstMysst King Monkey of Hedonism IslandRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    that is some retarded shit

    Mysst on
    ikbUJdU.jpg
  • tuggatugga Makin' movies Makin' songsRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Ruckus wrote: »
    tugga wrote: »
    Kitten wrote: »
    retail...blah. Customers are the devil. Some guy got pissed at me because I would give him 30 % off his whole freakin' purchase. I'm not risking my job so you can save 10 dollars.

    My bookstores changing it's return policy to no longer accept returns without receipt at the end of the month, and people are already bitching at me about it. It's like they think we have no right to have a policy.

    I's really thinking about finding a job that has nothing to do with the general public...

    i love people who think theyre entitled to a discount just cause its a display model

    we fucking built the bike yesterday you asshole and were waiving the assembly fee what the fuck is wrong with you

    the most we can offer them is 10% which even for the most expensive bike comes out to be only $15

    if you ask for a display discount before i offer to waive the assembly charge then i will call the cashier up front to make sure they charge assembly, which is $10

    Your most expensive bike is only $150? I'd never buy a bike there.

    its toys r us i wouldnt expect you to buy a bike from me

    we sell MAYBE 50 adult bikes year round

    MAYBE

    tugga on
  • potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    and they aren't for adults
    just very large kids that can't be supported by their old teenage mutant ninja turtles bike
    and despite their parents highest hopes of little earnie getting some exercise the bike never gets used

    potatoe on
  • FizFiz Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I live in a neighborhood made up entirely of too-steep hills and I used to ride my bike all the time.

    Looking back, this explains what happened to my face

    Fiz on
    juggcat.jpg
  • bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Fiz wrote: »
    I live in a neighborhood made up entirely of too-steep hills and I used to ride my bike all the time.

    Looking back, this explains what happened to my face

    Yes I imagine face planting every 3 feet because you can't get momentum would fuck it up pretty bad.

    bowen on
    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
  • bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Joon wrote: »
    MikeRyu wrote: »
    This is why my choice to have an imaginary degree works much better. I don't have to deal with that sort of thing.

    -So do I just send you guys my transcript after I'm done with those summer classes or what?
    -Oh, no, you just tell us ahead of time the college and the classes you'll be taking. We'll get the information we need.
    -Okay, great!

    *2 months later*

    -Okay, so I'm all done. Is there anything left to do?
    -Yeah, we just need you to tell them to send us your transcript.
    -But... I explicitly asked that. You said I wouldn't have to.
    -Haha, nuh uh. Man, I hope you didn't take too many units.
    -What do you mean? I needed 8 and I took 9.
    -Well, yeah... You take 9 of their units. We might say you took 12 which would mean you took more than you should have and you'll have to petition to graduate.
    -But I took 9.
    -We might go ahead and give you 12.

    So because you need 8 and they want to give you 12 you can't graduate? That's weird, and fucked up. I understand if you took units from another school or something and they went down. But up? And this makes you not graduate? What is your school, ITT Tech?

    bowen on
    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
  • MorivethMoriveth BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWNRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Well my boss apologized for changing my schedule without telling me and said I could probably have Wednesday off if I wanted (and I do!)

    so hopefully that'll work out

    Moriveth on
  • IskanderIskander Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Mysst wrote: »
    Agree with him in Russian and then have a big russian laugh followed by a steam.

    did this

    also the vodka

    nikolai and i are now best friends

    Iskander on
  • MysstMysst King Monkey of Hedonism IslandRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Isk I want to learn russian as well as chinese, should I learn ruissian first? I really want to hit on chinese girls, though.

    Mysst on
    ikbUJdU.jpg
  • FizFiz Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Mandarin or Cantonese? Because if you know one of those you'll pretty much be guaranteed to get syphilis

    I can't remember which due to brain rot

    Fiz on
    juggcat.jpg
  • IskanderIskander Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Learn Russian. This enables you to get drunk more, which in turn gives you the opportunity to not give a fuck whether Chinese girls understand you or not when you hit on them.

    Also none of that 'twenty five words that sound exactly the same' bullshit. What kind of moon language is Chinese anyway.

    Iskander on
  • ascotascot Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    When people are like "oh i can speak Chinese..." and then "..yeah Cantonese" everyone's like "....kay"

    ascot on
  • MysstMysst King Monkey of Hedonism IslandRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Hey, my dad caught syphilis once, it can be a tradition. honestly though, I just like the way both sound, but for different reasons, and one of the chinese seems like the only one i'd use on a semi-regular basis. to, y'know, order food with.

    Mysst on
    ikbUJdU.jpg
  • FizFiz Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Mysst wrote: »
    Hey, my dad caught syphilis once, it can be a tradition. honestly though, I just like the way both sound, but for different reasons, and one of the chinese seems like the only one i'd use on a semi-regular basis. to, y'know, order food with.

    I'm pretty sure that if you go to Panda Express and try to order in Mandarin the Mexican people behind the counter will not understand you.

    Hooray for living in SoCal

    Fiz on
    juggcat.jpg
  • ascotascot Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Fiz wrote: »
    Mysst wrote: »
    Hey, my dad caught syphilis once, it can be a tradition. honestly though, I just like the way both sound, but for different reasons, and one of the chinese seems like the only one i'd use on a semi-regular basis. to, y'know, order food with.

    I'm pretty sure that if you go to Panda Express and try to order in Mandarin the Mexican people behind the counter will not understand you.

    Hooray for living in SoCal

    or they'll do that thing where you only want the 2 choice deal but they ask you for your third choice and you can't say no because nawwm nawwwm nommmm

    ascot on
  • MysstMysst King Monkey of Hedonism IslandRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Panda Express, while having godly orange chicken, is not one of my regular eating spots. my favorite local joint is run by a small woman made to be a bit taller by wearing platform flipflops.

    Mysst on
    ikbUJdU.jpg
  • RuckusRuckus Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Fuck you guys, now I really want the Sizzling Wok three choice combo which sucks because the only one here is on the opposite end of the city from where I live.

    Ruckus on
This discussion has been closed.