We have a new update on The Future of the Penny Arcade Forums.

Football - God 4 MVP!

13468944

Posts

  • GodGod Registered User regular
    edited October 2006
    Well, just in case you do want to see it:

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=rnCNh6mt12g

    God on
    sky.JPG
  • gundam470gundam470 Drunk Gorilla CaliforniaRegistered User regular
    edited October 2006
    God wrote:
    Well, just in case you do want to see it:

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=rnCNh6mt12g

    I suggest you put somekind of warning on that.

    It is truly horrific

    gundam470 on
    gorillaSig.jpg
  • BubbaTBubbaT Registered User regular
    edited October 2006
    Elkamil wrote:
    Ex-Packers groupie seeks score at polls
    The usually ho-hum race for Wisconsin secretary of state is being spiced up by one candidate's tell-all book about her bed-hopping exploits with Green Bay football legends during the team's glory days under Vince Lombardi in the 1960s.

    Sandy Sullivan, 65, a Republican with no political experience, published a gushing memoir in 2004 titled "Green Bay Love Stories and Other Affairs" in which she says she was the girlfriend of Packers Paul Hornung and Dan Currie, deflected a pass from retired Hall of Famer Don Hutson and was on the receiving end of a saucy comment from Richard Nixon.
    A whole book about fucking the boys in green? Is there a chapter for every offensive position?

    [Your "Packers" joke goes here]

    Don't forget mandatory references to "tight ends" and "wide receivers."

    BubbaT on
  • DynagripDynagrip Break me a million hearts HoustonRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited October 2006
    gundam470 wrote:
    God wrote:
    Well, just in case you do want to see it:

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=rnCNh6mt12g

    I suggest you put somekind of warning on that.

    It is truly horrific
    I haven't watched it yet because I'm at work. Just thinking about it makes my leg hurt. I broke my leg when I was five, that was no fun.

    Dynagrip on
  • gundam470gundam470 Drunk Gorilla CaliforniaRegistered User regular
    edited October 2006
    Dynagrip wrote:
    gundam470 wrote:
    God wrote:
    Well, just in case you do want to see it:

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=rnCNh6mt12g

    I suggest you put somekind of warning on that.

    It is truly horrific
    I haven't watched it yet because I'm at work. Just thinking about it makes my leg hurt. I broke my leg when I was five, that was no fun.

    It seriously...it makes me feel sick. Just watch the way LT reacts after the hit. and you'll know it's bad.

    gundam470 on
    gorillaSig.jpg
  • DynagripDynagrip Break me a million hearts HoustonRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited October 2006
    Oh jesus. I'm glad they didn't have the number of cameras back then that they do today.

    Dynagrip on
  • gundam470gundam470 Drunk Gorilla CaliforniaRegistered User regular
    edited October 2006
    Week 6 (PA 4):

    Buffalo at Detroit
    Carolina at Baltimore
    Cincinnati at Tampa Bay
    Houston at Dallas
    N.Y. Giants at Atlanta
    Philadelphia at New Orleans
    Seattle at St. Louis
    Tennessee at Washington
    Kansas City at Pittsburgh
    Miami at N.Y. Jets
    San Diego at San Francisco
    Oakland at Denver
    Chicago at Arizona

    gundam470 on
    gorillaSig.jpg
  • ElkiElki get busy Moderator, ClubPA Mod Emeritus
    edited October 2006
    Dynagrip wrote:
    This is pretty good piece on ESPN about Theisman's injury in 1985. I never saw the play. Kind of glad I haven't.
    I really don't want to watch that play, but I'm tempted.

    Elki on
    smCQ5WE.jpg
  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    edited October 2006
    If you are squeamish about leg injuries, this video has some nasty ones, the most notable is Sid Vicious snapping his leg in WCW just painful.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=muURh4vsXHc

    I saw a guy break his leg similarly in highschool during a volleyball match, just came down wrong.

    Preacher on
    I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.

    pleasepaypreacher.net
  • BubbaTBubbaT Registered User regular
    edited October 2006
    I remember seeing Freddie Mitchell break his leg at UCLA doing nothing but just running down the sideline. All of a sudden he had 2 right legs.

    BubbaT on
  • DynagripDynagrip Break me a million hearts HoustonRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited October 2006
    Elkamil wrote:
    Dynagrip wrote:
    This is pretty good piece on ESPN about Theisman's injury in 1985. I never saw the play. Kind of glad I haven't.
    I really don't want to watch that play, but I'm tempted.
    Do it! You can almost hear the snap.

    Dynagrip on
  • GodGod Registered User regular
    edited October 2006
    It's really not that bad. I mean, it looks painful as shit, but how many other painful, gross, or horrifying things have you seen on the internet? This isn't even in the top-1000.

    God on
    sky.JPG
  • DynagripDynagrip Break me a million hearts HoustonRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited October 2006
    God wrote:
    It's really not that bad. I mean, it looks painful as shit, but how many other painful, gross, or horrifying things have you seen on the internet? This isn't even in the top-1000.
    I wish there was some equivalent video featuring John Madden getting seriously injured. I'd masturbate to it.

    Dynagrip on
  • ElkiElki get busy Moderator, ClubPA Mod Emeritus
    edited October 2006
    That was nasty.

    And I loooove Parcells.

    Elki on
    smCQ5WE.jpg
  • The Green Eyed MonsterThe Green Eyed Monster i blame hip hop Registered User regular
    edited October 2006
    Worst Rated Player in Madden '07 Speaks Back
    Ethan Albright Strikes Back
    To: John Madden
    CC: Electronic Arts Sports
    From: Ethan Albright
    Re: Being the worst rated player on Madden '07
    Posted: 10/11/2006 by: Juan Turlington

    Hi, John, my name is Ethan Albright. I play line for the Washington Redskins. You probably already knew that, so I'll continue. I am writing in regards to the overall player rating of 53 that I have received in Madden NFL Football 2007. I feel that this is fucking bullshit and you should kiss my mother-fucking ass. Ahmed Carroll was rated a 78 and the Packers just cut his ass on a Tuesday morning after his performance in a Monday night game. That is pretty terrible. The worst part is that his overall rating was sniffing 80.

    You know what, John? Two can play this game. I rate you a fucking 12. I rate you a fucking 12 in Ethan Albright Football 2000-ever… except for in the category of ball-licking. That is where I will spot you a 98 rating. You will receive this score because I will never give your blubbery ass a 99 in any category. Take that, pencil-dick. Go do Al Micheals or something. Boom. Score one for Red Beard.

    It's also pretty wonderful that my awareness rating was 59. You make it sound like I wake up in the morning, helplessly shit and piss myself, then lose three of my teeth before I discover that I am trying to eat a rock for breakfast. Fuck, John, I understand you saying that I am slow and lacking athleticism, but a rating like this pretty much labels me as retarded. Rod "He Hate Me" Smart has a 52 in this category. Electronic Arts is saying that seven rating points separate me and the breathing embodiment of the perfect oxymoron. Rod Smart struggled to arrange words in sentence form. Cave men had better hold of the English language. The only actions that separate point values of ignorance at this embarrassing level are things like using your own toothbrush to wipe your ass. I basically edged out Rod by my lack of shit teeth. If I take a night school class, could you bump me up to a 60?

    I guess I just can't fathom the fact that I am the absolute worst player rated out of the entire NFL. Fuck, man, there are some shitty guys out there. Amongst everyone, I was rated the absolute worst.

    I have received the impression that you feel that I am lacking in the agility category. I should consider a walk through my living room where I don't crash trough a wall or kick over furniture a resounding success. My agility rating on your game is 33. It makes it sound like I just topple over if I start walking too fast. Ted Washington is rated a 40 in agility. He is listed at 365 ponds. If Ted Washington tied a white lady up and made her wear a metal bikini, he'd look just like Jabba the Hut.

    John, you are such a fucking dick. I also noticed that my kick return rating was a 0. I was rated a fucking zero? So you feel that I shouldn't even receive a 10, or even a 5? You are pretty much saying that I couldn't even fall forward on a ball kicked in my direction. I would just stand there and let the ball bounce off of my fucking face. Fuck that, John, I returned an onside kick 6 yards in 2002. You should have just slapped a - 4 on me and had the EA staff ambush me with paintball guns.

    Finally, I would like to comment on an unlikely topic, my pass coverage ratings. I see that I am a better at man-to-man coverage (31) than zone (21). Fuck me sideways with a lunchbox. Where did these scores even come from? How much time is spent coming up with the pass coverage ratings of offensive lineman? Can I have that job? Let's see here, I think that Orlando Pace would be slightly better at jumping intermediate routes than Larry Allen. While I'm at it, I can assign the passing ratings for offensive lineman as well. I can use mine as a guide.

    I was rated with a throwing power of 17 and accuracy of 16. Orlando Pace is has a 22 power and 17 accuracy rating. Did someone at EA really put time into figuring out that Orlando Pace edges out Ethan Albright in both throwing power and accuracy? I will challenge him any day. My horrible passer ratings are of greatest misfortune to my son, Red Beard Jr. The poor boy is not only hideously ugly and covered by freakishly large freckles. He also has to suffer through playing catch with me and my senile-elderly-woman-type passer ratings. A session of tossing the pigskin usually consists of me missing my son by thirty yards in sporadic directions. I led him in front of a fire truck once and my wife kicked my ass. This is because of my 76 toughness rating. Yes, a 76 is far better than the other ratings, but I'm a fucking lineman, damn it. NFL Linemen are considered to be synonymous with toughness. According to your game, I am a retarded, uncoordinated, pussy-ass fuckwad that can't fall on a kickoff, throw, or spell. I am, however, slightly better at manning up on a receiver than dropping into zone coverage. You lose your mind more and more each year, old man.

    Fuck you, John. Please expect to find red pubes in various meals you consume for the rest of your life. If you fuck with Ethan Albright, you call down the thunder.

    Rot in Hell,

    Ethan Albright

    [spoiler:8b56283fcc]it's not really Ethan Albright, but a joke column, but damn if it isn't hilarious[/spoiler:8b56283fcc]

    The Green Eyed Monster on
  • DynagripDynagrip Break me a million hearts HoustonRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited October 2006
    That was pretty damn funny.

    Also, I can't believe people in this thread are still picking Oakland to win games...especially against Denver... at Denver.

    Dynagrip on
  • The Green Eyed MonsterThe Green Eyed Monster i blame hip hop Registered User regular
    edited October 2006
    Dynagrip wrote:
    That was pretty damn funny.

    Also, I can't believe people in this thread are still picking Oakland to win games...especially against Denver... at Denver.
    This is definitely a choice worthy of mockery.

    Personally I'm riding the "Contract the Raiders" bandwagon throughout the season. Hop on quick before it fills up.

    The Green Eyed Monster on
  • ElkiElki get busy Moderator, ClubPA Mod Emeritus
    edited October 2006
    Week 6 (PA 4):

    Buffalo at Detroit
    Carolina at Baltimore
    Cincinnati at Tampa Bay
    Houston at Dallas
    N.Y. Giants at Atlanta
    Philadelphia at New Orleans
    Seattle at St. Louis
    Tennessee at Washington
    Kansas City at Pittsburgh
    Miami at N.Y. Jets
    San Diego at San Francisco
    Oakland at Denver
    Chicago at Arizona

    Elki on
    smCQ5WE.jpg
  • HandgimpHandgimp R+L=J Family PhotoRegistered User regular
    edited October 2006
    So, in college football news:

    ADRIAN PETERSON OUT FOR SEASON

    Broke his collarbone on a 53 yard touchdown run. 155 yards away from being OU's alltime rushing leader. He may be back for the bowl game, if OU makes it.

    Sucks for him. Hopefully he'll still be a high draft pick next year.

    Handgimp on
    PwH4Ipj.jpg
  • ElkiElki get busy Moderator, ClubPA Mod Emeritus
    edited October 2006
    I like coverage ESPN2 is doing right now (The Full Circle deal), even though I don't like Cowherd much. It's certainly creative. Anybody else watching?

    Elki on
    smCQ5WE.jpg
  • HandgimpHandgimp R+L=J Family PhotoRegistered User regular
    edited October 2006
    I haven't checked ESPN2; I wish I had ESPN U so I could check out that multipe cameras thing. It looked really neat.

    Handgimp on
    PwH4Ipj.jpg
  • NambkabNambkab Registered User regular
    edited October 2006
    Week 6 (PA 4):

    Buffalo at Detroit
    Carolina at Baltimore
    Cincinnati at Tampa Bay
    Houston at Dallas
    N.Y. Giants at Atlanta
    Philadelphia at New Orleans
    Seattle at St. Louis
    Tennessee at Washington
    Kansas City at Pittsburgh
    Miami at N.Y. Jets
    San Diego at San Francisco
    Oakland at Denver
    Chicago at Arizona

    This week will be wild, lots of pretty even matchups.

    Nambkab on
  • ElkiElki get busy Moderator, ClubPA Mod Emeritus
    edited October 2006
    Handgimp wrote:
    I haven't checked ESPN2; I wish I had ESPN U so I could check out that multipe cameras thing. It looked really neat.
    They're doing the exact same camera thing on ESPN2, but without the play-by-play. They were just talking about football and the two teams in general, without focusing on every single play. I liked that second part a lot more than the multiple angles gimmick. Imagine the same thing, with more interesting commentators + NFL football... it gives me goosebumps.

    Elki on
    smCQ5WE.jpg
  • Mr Slippy FistMr Slippy Fist Registered User regular
    edited October 2006
    Week 6 (PA 4):

    Buffalo at Detroit
    Carolina at Baltimore
    Cincinnati at Tampa Bay
    Houston at Dallas
    N.Y. Giants at Atlanta
    Philadelphia at New Orleans
    Seattle at St. Louis
    Tennessee at Washington
    Kansas City at Pittsburgh
    Miami at N.Y. Jets
    San Diego at San Francisco
    Oakland at Denver
    Chicago at Arizona

    Mr Slippy Fist on
    Yes, I hate my username and wish I could sign up with a new one. Registration sucks.
  • suttbeckssuttbecks Registered User regular
    edited October 2006
    Buffalo at *Detroit
    Carolina at *Baltimore
    Cincinnati* at Tampa Bay
    Houston at *Dallas
    N.Y. Giants at *Atlanta
    Philadelphia* at New Orleans
    Seattle at *St. Louis
    Tennessee at *Washington
    Kansas City* at Pittsburgh
    Miami at *N.Y. Jets
    San Diego* at San Francisco
    Oakland at *Denver
    Chicago* at Arizona

    suttbecks on
  • The Green Eyed MonsterThe Green Eyed Monster i blame hip hop Registered User regular
    edited October 2006
    Sorry I'm so late -- I haven't checked any scores this morning, I swear:
    suttbecks wrote:
    Buffalo at Detroit
    Carolina at Baltimore
    Cincinnati at Tampa Bay
    Houston at Dallas
    N.Y. Giants at Atlanta
    Philadelphia at New Orleans
    Seattle at St. Louis
    Tennessee at Washington
    Kansas City at Pittsburgh
    Miami at N.Y. Jets
    San Diego at San Francisco
    Oakland at Denver
    Chicago at Arizona

    Sorry, I was out late last night and just got home.

    The Green Eyed Monster on
  • DynagripDynagrip Break me a million hearts HoustonRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited October 2006
    Good 1st half, Texans...too bad there were 2 more quarters to play.

    Dynagrip on
  • gundam470gundam470 Drunk Gorilla CaliforniaRegistered User regular
    edited October 2006
    Man, i'm gonna be lucky if i'm .500 on my picks this week. Lots of last minute losses for my picks

    gundam470 on
    gorillaSig.jpg
  • DynagripDynagrip Break me a million hearts HoustonRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited October 2006
    I didn't do so hot this week.

    Philly, Cincinnati, Baltimore, etc losing...

    Dynagrip on
  • AdrenalineAdrenaline Registered User regular
    edited October 2006
    All 258259825 people picking Cincy were wrong. :P

    Adrenaline on
    I will show you fear in a handful of dust
  • NambkabNambkab Registered User regular
    edited October 2006
    Yeah I started to pick Tampa again too, just on the supposition they couldn't keep losing. Same with the Titans...unfortunately I picked the loser in both of those. All in all I'll be lucky as well to go .500 this week.

    Nambkab on
  • suttbeckssuttbecks Registered User regular
    edited October 2006
    Oof, my picks aren't looking so good now.

    suttbecks on
  • PootPoot Registered User regular
    edited October 2006
    Bahahaha. Josh Brown strikes again.

    Poot on
  • JragghenJragghen Registered User regular
    edited October 2006
    Nice to see the Steelers looking competent again. Hopefully they can't snatch defeat from the jaws of victory.

    Of course, they're in a hole still, even WITH Baltimore and Cincy losing.

    Jragghen on
  • ElkiElki get busy Moderator, ClubPA Mod Emeritus
    edited October 2006
    Adrenaline wrote:
    All 258259825 people picking Cincy were wrong. :P
    Not as wrong as those who picked Washington. :D

    Elki on
    smCQ5WE.jpg
  • JragghenJragghen Registered User regular
    edited October 2006
    Despite being without three injured regulars -- one of whom, guard Kendall Simmons, fell asleep with an ice pack on his leg and sustained frostbite...

    This amused me far more than it should.

    Jragghen on
  • PootPoot Registered User regular
    edited October 2006
    Wow.

    I was absolutely terrible at picking this week.

    Poot on
  • DynagripDynagrip Break me a million hearts HoustonRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited October 2006
    We all were. We all were.

    Dynagrip on
  • ElkiElki get busy Moderator, ClubPA Mod Emeritus
    edited October 2006
    Dynagrip wrote:
    We all were. We all were.
    Yeps. DeUZ and gundam got 7 wins, and most of us have 6.

    Elki on
    smCQ5WE.jpg
  • ElkiElki get busy Moderator, ClubPA Mod Emeritus
    edited October 2006
    I love the presence of so many cameras in NFL games. NFL replays was showing highlights of T.O. coming over to the sideline, and jumping up and down while celebrating one of his touchdowns with some of his teammates. Parcells was in the shot, and he just shakes his head with a really hilarious look on his face.

    And I love the fact that Young got his first win before Leinart.

    Elki on
    smCQ5WE.jpg
This discussion has been closed.