I still don't know what this is about, but apparently in Windows the backgrounds of your desktop and the logoff/on screen can be different pictures.
So sometimes I would archive images of naked sexladies because I guess I was afraid my access to the Internet would run out one day and I didn't want to be the grasshopper who just masturbated carefree all the time. I wanted to be the ant who worked diligently to stockpile pornography so that when winter came I would have a comfortable supply.
On occasion, instead of Save Image I would accidentally hit Set as Desktop Background. Now I was unaware, but this had changed both my regular desktop and my logoff backgrounds to depict luscious unrestricted flesh. Of course when I right-click-properties'd and chose a new wallpaper by navigating through the display options, this only corrected the desktop image.
My mother came into my room and told me to shut down, for whatever reason we were about to have a family outing.
When the breasts and inviting vagina flashed on screen for a few seconds during the logoff, basically this happened:
I don't remember ever not knowing about sex. I vaguely remember 'the talk'. I was in second grade and I was watching Roseanne with my mom. I remember very clearly that she said I wasn't supposed to talk about it at school until we took sex ed because my friends' parents had to choose when it was appropriate to tell them. I didn't think much of it.
It's one of my mom's favorite stories, so I've been filled in on the details. Apparently I heard the word "sex" somewhere (she says on the bus, I had thought it was Roseanne), and I had only a vague idea of what it was from the context. She told me it was something a man and a woman did when they loved each other very much and that that's how babies or made. Apparently, I then asked "Yeah, but how do you do sex", so she told me. I'm told I thought it was gross, which makes sense.
My mom's pretty awesome. She's way religious, my dad's an atheist-in-denial. She's never had any hangups about sex or nudity- she's the one who gave me the talk, bought me my first "wallet condom", raised me to not freak out about being naked, all of that. My dad's a total prude, unless he's trying to make a joke, then he might as well be twelve. It's kinda weird.
laughingfuzzball on
0
BroloBroseidonLord of the BroceanRegistered Userregular
i was never told i could ask questions
i was shown a book
when i was 5 years old
and told a lot of things
i started digging through their porn and whatnot, reading the sex-books and all that, at that same age
i knew waaaaaay more than i should've be the time i was 7
and developed an unnatural curiosity
I put it all together when I was in like 5th grade
And man that made shit really weird
I was told nothing, and asked nothing. There were many scientific breakthroughs during my teenage years.
I love you, Rolo
my parents gave me a book with cartoon illustrations when I was very young
We had a pop-up 3D book. You could see inside the vagina as the sperm was coming out, and fold the penis in half to see the little sperm making their way up.
Really I think it confused the situation a lot more than it helped. I remember at the age of seven or eight thinking that in place of a butt-hole, like boys had, girls had a vagina instead, and instead of pooping they had kids.
Haha, first internet porn for me was... The Sun's Page 3 website
Haha, I think my first ever experience with porn was the Daily Sport. I had a friend who got his Mum to buy it for him, she didn't know what it was and the guy behind the counter gave her the strangest look.
Really I think it confused the situation a lot more than it helped. I remember at the age of seven or eight thinking that in place of a butt-hole, like boys had, girls had a vagina instead, and instead of pooping they had kids.
Hilarity.
In Health class they showed us an orgasm from inside a vagina. While the other kids were gasping in the heat of the moment, I was pondering how the hell they got a camera in there.
I still don't know what this is about, but apparently in Windows the backgrounds of your desktop and the logoff/on screen can be different pictures.
So sometimes I would archive images of naked sexladies because I guess I was afraid my access to the Internet would run out one day and I didn't want to be the grasshopper who just masturbated carefree all the time. I wanted to be the ant who worked diligently to stockpile pornography so that when winter came I would have a comfortable supply.
On occasion, instead of Save Image I would accidentally hit Set as Desktop Background. Now I was unaware, but this had changed both my regular desktop and my logoff backgrounds to depict luscious unrestricted flesh. Of course when I right-click-properties'd and chose a new wallpaper by navigating through the display options, this only corrected the desktop image.
My mother came into my room and told me to shut down, for whatever reason we were about to have a family outing.
When the breasts and inviting vagina flashed on screen for a few seconds during the logoff, basically this happened:
[IMG][/img]
bahahaha.
the cheat on
0
BroloBroseidonLord of the BroceanRegistered Userregular
I think that there's a point in everyone's life when they get the urge to penetrate themselves with a dildo that looks like it is inspired by Dr. Seussian literature.
You take it in your hands, gently caressing the doodlewogs and admiring the wozzletogs.
when my dad had the talk with me, we did that typical thing where we sat on the steps and the sun was setting and he imparted his wisdom on me, but I ruined it because I would not let go of the concept of women having eggs. I kept badgering him about it.
The first sex ed thing I experienced was this video that I watched with the other dudes in 5th grade. one part sticks in my mind in that it was this dude in the tub, and he had no pubic hair, and then BAM, he did. He looked around for the reason behind this change of events and there were a bunch of winged penises flying above him! I don't know what they were trying to convey!
I've told those before, sorry to pull a Pony (as it were)
when my dad had the talk with me, we did that typical thing where we sat on the steps and the sun was setting and he imparted his wisdom on me, but I ruined it because I would not let go of the concept of women having eggs. I kept badgering him about it.
haha aww
it's like a strip of calvin and hobbes except with subject matter calvin and hobbes wouldn't cover
man now i totally want to make a guess who version but with dildoes
that'd be amusing
IS YOURS SPONSORED BY SUE JOHNSON?
YES!
CLAKCLAKCLAKCLAKCLAKCLAKCLAKCLAK
At my friends' band's last show we played Guess Who while we waited for it to be time to set up
So I did the "is your guy black" thing
"Yes"
CLACK CLACK CLACK CLACK CLACK
Three left
when my dad had the talk with me, we did that typical thing where we sat on the steps and the sun was setting and he imparted his wisdom on me, but I ruined it because I would not let go of the concept of women having eggs. I kept badgering him about it.
haha aww
it's like a strip of calvin and hobbes except with subject matter calvin and hobbes wouldn't cover
I think we're both thinking of the same strip, with the quarter?
Posts
So sometimes I would archive images of naked sexladies because I guess I was afraid my access to the Internet would run out one day and I didn't want to be the grasshopper who just masturbated carefree all the time. I wanted to be the ant who worked diligently to stockpile pornography so that when winter came I would have a comfortable supply.
On occasion, instead of Save Image I would accidentally hit Set as Desktop Background. Now I was unaware, but this had changed both my regular desktop and my logoff backgrounds to depict luscious unrestricted flesh. Of course when I right-click-properties'd and chose a new wallpaper by navigating through the display options, this only corrected the desktop image.
My mother came into my room and told me to shut down, for whatever reason we were about to have a family outing.
When the breasts and inviting vagina flashed on screen for a few seconds during the logoff, basically this happened:
Thats also kind of weird
Wacking it while thinking about your friend or your mother or something
It's one of my mom's favorite stories, so I've been filled in on the details. Apparently I heard the word "sex" somewhere (she says on the bus, I had thought it was Roseanne), and I had only a vague idea of what it was from the context. She told me it was something a man and a woman did when they loved each other very much and that that's how babies or made. Apparently, I then asked "Yeah, but how do you do sex", so she told me. I'm told I thought it was gross, which makes sense.
My mom's pretty awesome. She's way religious, my dad's an atheist-in-denial. She's never had any hangups about sex or nudity- she's the one who gave me the talk, bought me my first "wallet condom", raised me to not freak out about being naked, all of that. My dad's a total prude, unless he's trying to make a joke, then he might as well be twelve. It's kinda weird.
We had a pop-up 3D book. You could see inside the vagina as the sperm was coming out, and fold the penis in half to see the little sperm making their way up.
Really I think it confused the situation a lot more than it helped. I remember at the age of seven or eight thinking that in place of a butt-hole, like boys had, girls had a vagina instead, and instead of pooping they had kids.
firman
also
i would sig that whole ant/grasshoper thing if i sigged things
seriously.
Follow me on Twitter??
Haha, I think my first ever experience with porn was the Daily Sport. I had a friend who got his Mum to buy it for him, she didn't know what it was and the guy behind the counter gave her the strangest look.
Hilarity.
In Health class they showed us an orgasm from inside a vagina. While the other kids were gasping in the heat of the moment, I was pondering how the hell they got a camera in there.
Oh shit I should look her up.
Oh the fun we had.
TO GOOGLE!
bahahaha.
Karen McDougal over here.
meh.
You take it in your hands, gently caressing the doodlewogs and admiring the wozzletogs.
"Oh, the places you'll go," you whisper to it.
yeah in retrospect she's not that hot, but at the time she was the only game in town
well, unless QVC was selling fitness machines
Follow me on Twitter??
One of my buddies was sleeping over and we were in the basement playing video games til he fell asleep, then i turn off the game and watch TV.
I stumble across the staticy Playboy channel.
I watch for a while, somehow the hand ends up in the pants.
Then
Then I had to waddle away past him sneakily to the bathroom.
If I ever meet your girlfriend do you allow me to tell her about this, just for fun
Man, that friend doesn't even know this happened.
You didnt answer my question!
Sure, go for it.
She's heard worse things about me.
The first sex ed thing I experienced was this video that I watched with the other dudes in 5th grade. one part sticks in my mind in that it was this dude in the tub, and he had no pubic hair, and then BAM, he did. He looked around for the reason behind this change of events and there were a bunch of winged penises flying above him! I don't know what they were trying to convey!
I've told those before, sorry to pull a Pony (as it were)
go
Man I can't even think of any others what the fuck she took over my mind!
haha aww
it's like a strip of calvin and hobbes except with subject matter calvin and hobbes wouldn't cover
Can I make up things to make it more interesting?
At my friends' band's last show we played Guess Who while we waited for it to be time to set up
So I did the "is your guy black" thing
"Yes"
CLACK CLACK CLACK CLACK CLACK
Three left
I think we're both thinking of the same strip, with the quarter?
I ran into the bathroom, finished off the last bit and let it drop into the toilet.
I just stood there, staring as the gloopy white stuff sank to the bottom of the bowl.
After the shock wore off, I flushed, cleaned myself up, walked back to my bedroom and got back into bed.
I was very proud.
frogs and cigarettes sounds like a good idea
a good french idea
My parents never gave me the talk, but by the time 7th grade rolled around I knew what I was doing.
Nadja Nace, or whatever.
Gianna, of course...
Hm.... Mr. Dropping Loads...