DRAMMA MIA! (blame futility)

Hacksaw

Theater.



You all know it, or know of it (I hope). For those of you who don't, it is the oldest known practice of performing arts as invented by the Greeks over 4000 years ago as an excuse for them to bugger one another (and little boys, of course!) in amphitheaters without the rest of their fellow citizens cutting off their heads and casting their corpses into the ocean. Little has changed. But enough about ancient Mediterranean pederasts. Lets talk about theater as it pertains to us today, in the (mostly) non-pederast world.

As some of you undoubtedly know, I myself am a Theatre* major. This means I immerse myself in this world 24/7 by my own free will. On some days, I question myself for doing this. Every day of these past two weeks has been one of those days. Since roughly the beginning of August, I've been the principal technical director on my school's production of Actor!, a play by Frederick Stroppel. My job has primarily consisted of designing and constructing the set, building certain props, and hauling shit for the production from our off campus storage site. Over the last few days we've kicked things into overdrive, and are now focusing on finalizing every aspect of the production before it opens on Friday.

We haven't even finished building the set all the way, yet.

Needless to say, things in my life have been stressful. I've even found myself in a place where I'm unjustifiably lashing out at my loved ones, and the academic year only just started on Monday. I can no doubt look forward to another nine glorious months of this before I venture forth into the real world to pursue this shit full time (god help me).

So what about you, SE++? What are your experiences with theater? Are they as frustrating and tiring as my own? Are they not? Are they anything? Come, sit by the fire and tell me your stories. But don't stay too long; you might find yourself unable to leave, if you do.

*: That's how they spell it, not me.

Poorochondriac

I do not know if you, personally, are the worst.

But theater majors are the fucking worst.

QuestionMarkMan

You guys are worse than film majors

Metzger Meister

I was in a production of A Christmas Story a few years back. The guy who played the Narrator said I was one of the most amazing young actors he'd ever known, and that I easily had some of the best facial expression and emotional... stuff that he'd seen. Dude was pretty class.


Also I've seen a few shows. Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat, The Best Christmas Pageant Ever or whatever that thing is... not many edgy plays in the Cheyenne theatre scene.

trentsteel

Poorochondriac wrote: »

I do not know if you, personally, are the worst.

But theater majors are the fucking worst.

I am backing this statement up all the way.

The fucking worst.

Bucketman

I am NOT a theater major. I do however love the theater. To act, to watch, to sing, to view on DvD. All are great experiences.

trentsteel

Metzger Meister wrote: »

I was in a production of A Christmas Story a few years back. The guy who played the Narrator said I was one of the most amazing young actors he'd ever known, and that I easily had some of the best facial expression and emotional... stuff that he'd seen. Dude was pretty clearly trying to mouth fuck me.

Rankenphile

is this your clumsy way of coming out?

because we get it

you're gay

whoop-ti-fucking-do

Urian

Poorochondriac wrote: »

I do not know if you, personally, are the worst.

But theater majors are the fucking worst.

yes yes yes yes yes yes

agreement in spades

Metzger Meister

trentsteel wrote: »

Metzger Meister wrote: »

I was in a production of A Christmas Story a few years back. The guy who played the Narrator said I was one of the most amazing young actors he'd ever known, and that I easily had some of the best facial expression and emotional... stuff that he'd seen. Dude was pretty clearly trying to mouth fuck me.

Hey. Hey. I was NOT the most attractive young boy in that production by any stretch of the imagination.

Bucketman

I went to try out for a play at my school. And the productions where run by Theater Major seniors and all of them basically told me that if you wern't a theater major the best part you could hope for would be something backstage, because, according to the head douch bag, if you truely had the passion for acting and any talent at all your major would be theater. So if its not, then you either don't care enough, suck, or both.

trentsteel

I know a girl that does stage plays all year round as well as dinner theatre.

She gives UNEARTHLY blow jobs.

QuestionMarkMan

ACTING

Hacksaw

Poorochondriac wrote: »

I do not know if you, personally, are the worst.

But theater majors are the fucking worst.

Oh I know. Yesterday I was talking with one of the more "prestigious" members of my uni's little community and he revealed that he was a big fan of Ayn Rand. Today I came into work on the set some more and he was playing Jack Johnson. I now know how I survived last year with these people: I (mercifully) didn't interact with them on a regular basis outside of class. I'm not sure I'm going to be able to handle a fully involved academic year of this shit without killing at least a few of them.

DrIanMalcolm

I love the guys who like to give their opinion on everything

Dex Dynamo

I almost became a theater minor before I found I could study comic books at my school, and decided I wanted money even less

Hacksaw

trentsteel wrote: »

I know a girl that does stage plays all year round as well as dinner theatre.

She gives UNEARTHLY blow jobs.

Good for her. If you ask her, she'll probably tell you that if you want to make it in theater, you've either got to A) be good; know the right people; or C) know how to fuck and suck like a champ. Listen to her, because this is the truth.

trentsteel

Hacksaw wrote: »

trentsteel wrote: »

I know a girl that does stage plays all year round as well as dinner theatre.

She gives UNEARTHLY blow jobs.

Good for her. If you ask her, she'll probably tell you that if you want to make it in theater, you've either got to A) be good; know the right people; or C) know how to fuck and suck like a champ. Listen to her, because this is the truth.

She has all three covered. As far as I know she's never had to go C

Hacksaw

trentsteel wrote: »

Hacksaw wrote: »

trentsteel wrote: »

I know a girl that does stage plays all year round as well as dinner theatre.

She gives UNEARTHLY blow jobs.

Good for her. If you ask her, she'll probably tell you that if you want to make it in theater, you've either got to A) be good; know the right people; or C) know how to fuck and suck like a champ. Listen to her, because this is the truth.

She has all three covered. As far as I know she's never had to go C

Oh she's had to go to C. She's had to go to C.

Olivaw

QuestionMarkMan wrote: »

ACTING

transistorsect

During my junior year, I was the sound tech for the one act play at my high school. I don't remember the name of the play but my friend ended up taking off his pants somewhere during the middle of it.

At the competition I managed to screw up and we had no audio. I a bloo bloo blooed.

Fiz

I'm an Opera singer. It's pretty bitchin'

Bogey and I went to see Pagliacci together last year and he totally didn't put out

Poorochondriac

What?

Edit: Haha, he deleted his post.

Hacksaw

Fiz wrote: »

I'm an Opera singer. It's pretty bitchin'

Bogey and I went to see Pagliacci together last year and he totally didn't put out

The Opera singers here range from pretty fucking awesome to pretty fucking pretentious. Which are you, Fiz?

Fiz

Hacksaw wrote: »

Fiz wrote: »

I'm an Opera singer. It's pretty bitchin'

Bogey and I went to see Pagliacci together last year and he totally didn't put out

The Opera singers here range from pretty fucking awesome to pretty fucking pretentious. Which are you, Fiz?

I've been told that I am quite the ass

Hacksaw

Fiz wrote: »

Hacksaw wrote: »

Fiz wrote: »

I'm an Opera singer. It's pretty bitchin'

Bogey and I went to see Pagliacci together last year and he totally didn't put out

The Opera singers here range from pretty fucking awesome to pretty fucking pretentious. Which are you, Fiz?

I've been told that I am quite the ass

So you're a bottom? The catcher, if you will?

Gotcha.

Janson

I like theatre

I need to go more often, really

Hacksaw

Janson wrote: »

I like theatre

I need to go more often, really

Janson you are a wonderful person. It's people like you that make my existence not totally worthless, and I you for it.

Janson

I always love seeing what they manage to do with the sets, too. I sometimes think it would've been fun to be a set designer (I have no idea if they are pretentious).

I've rarely seen a very bad production, and I've seen some which have surprised me (an adaptation of The Owl Who Was Afraid of the Dark, a children's book; I couldn't imagine how they would turn it into a play but it was excellent).

Hacksaw

Janson wrote: »

I always love seeing what they manage to do with the sets, too. I sometimes think it would've been fun to be a set designer (I have no idea if they are pretentious).

I've rarely seen a very bad production, and I've seen some which have surprised me (an adaptation of The Owl Who Was Afraid of the Dark, a children's book; I couldn't imagine how they would turn it into a play but it was excellent).

A set designer usually just sits back and does exactly that: they design the set. This includes (but is not limited to) doing concept art for the set, drafting up plans and elevations for the set, and creating scale models of the set to show to the director and producer(s) (and possibly even the playwright, depending on how intimate the production is). It's a pretty cushy job and entails little to no intensive physical labor. If my only responsibility to this production was limited to designing the set, I'd undoubtedly be a happier man, but nooooo, I just had to be the principal technical director, as well. I don't know what I was thinking volunteering for that position (though in all likelihood I probably wasn't).

redhead

DrIanMalcolm wrote: »

I love the guys who like to give their opinion on everything

This is my opinion too!

Hacksaw

redhead wrote: »

DrIanMalcolm wrote: »

I love the guys who like to give their opinion on everything

This is my opinion too!

Well aren't you just little Mr. "Hey Everyone I've Got A Fucking Opinion And I Want To Tell You About It!"

Umaro

I am majoring in Theatre with an emphasis in performance.

Yep.

Quetzi

I'm a theatre minor or something, because my school is actually a really strong theatre program which I am almost positive that I would not qualify for because I'm a pretty good actor but not like good enough to live off of it. But regardless, that means I spend a lot of time around the theatre world.

Also because my school is such a theatre school a large percentage of my friends are actors of some variety. Which makes for interesting times.

Hunter

I support theater majors.


I go out to restaurants and leave 15 to 20% gratuities.

Zombot

I was in a play this year.
So, like I'm pretty much an actor now.

NotASenator

As some of you undoubtedly know, I myself am a Theatre* major

We know because you remind us of it every ten fuck seconds.

neville

Straightzi wrote: »

I'm weird.

SageinaRage

I like acting a lot, but I went to a technical school. I did a lot of shows in an unofficial capacity, and now I'm thinking of trying to do acting as a career.

Khavall

I like the theater because actors need pianists and music directors and pay money for them.


And money allows me to buy food and pay rent.

GoldenSeducer

I played Lily St. Regis in Annie Jr. in 6th grade. That's the extent of my theater experience unless singing in talent shows counts.

Theater is awesome, though. As long as the actors aren't dicks, the production is fantastic. However, dickiness has a habit of showing up in an actor's performance, and that makes me hate it sometimes.