The new forums will be named Coin Return (based on the most recent vote)! You can check on the status and timeline of the transition to the new forums here.
The Guiding Principles and New Rules document is now in effect.
Ninjas can't catch you if you're on fire. *Not ninja related.
Lackadaisical
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
For roughly ten minutes yesterday I lay in bed whilst awake. I had, for lack of a better explanation, awoken. For these ten minutes contemplation overtook me--the workings of the world unraveled in my head, and then I realized that I had misplaced it. My tinfoil hat--the very shield that keeps me sane--was in fact missing.
****The above is a joke, it would be much easier if I were just crazy. Seriously, I think I'd prefer the randomness of life when you constantly meander around proclaiming that a standard pair of socks can't slay wigglebums, and that screaming random obscenities at babies is the only way to purge the world of ghosts.*****
But in all seriousness, I need help. My medical insurance goes into effect in a couple of days at which time I assure you, and this is not to be taken lightly, but I will go see a therapist or a psychiatrist, or maybe a psychologist. Until then I'm just a bucket of crazy with a story--here goes.
"I've been evicted from my household!" Is what I want to say, but it's not really true. I've shipped off to college is the truth. In doing so I've moved a bit over a hundred miles (mostly uphill) from my family and friends (I'm lonely! Big surprise, right?) Not to mention I'm extremely anti-social and somewhat shy. Honestly, I lay in bed at night thinking of embarrassing moments from six years ago when I was still in high school (what the fuck, who does this? Well, other than me.) The friends I have where I used to live aren't particularly helpful either. In the end (after a mass-exodus of friends to college at the proper time [just out of high school.]) I was left with three friends; one a quintessential gamer whom is purely devoted to games and constantly chugs down a jug (literally a 1-gallon jug) of diet cola daily, another that was a bit of a player (would easily ditch us if it meant that he might get laid.) And the third isn't worth mentioning. Totally fucking useless, not really friends at all. Kind of people that if I call and try and talk to, they'd be more annoyed with the fact that I called than anything else and try hard to get off the phone as quickly as possible just because I'm not within 3 miles anymore. (sort of sad, I guess. Makes me wonder what I was to any of them.) I'm having a lot of trouble dealing with this fact--I don't really have any friends, and don't really remember the whole process of making friends nor do I want to be confused with some kind of stalker, or something.
I'm overweight. Last tally was roughly 340 pounds(quit positive it's only gotten worse.) I'm really clueless in the actions for weight loss--can devote the time but I have trouble staying motivated(that is to say that I easily lose track of time, I may sit down and start playing something and then, "whoosh!" What the, it's been five hours?") <---This is to the point where earlier this week I hadn't actually showered in over four days, was so busy watching anime and the like that by the time I thought to it was around 6 o'clock (I'd likely gotten up twelve hours before.) As far as the fitness thread in these forums goes--it's helpful, it's nice to know what's good to eat and what's bad, but that doesn't really help me as far as 1. Preparing it. I can cook, but what the hell do you combine brown rice with. 2. Serving size/how many times do you consume this serving daily, etc. Queries I've placed in the fitness thread have come up short, and I've asked multiple questions and occasionally been ignored (although I imagine that this is just due to the fast-pace of the thread and people just not noticing that this hasn't been answered yet.) 3. The main query I had in the thread was simply this: when trying to lose weight how much do you eat, when, and what; chart out a few days worth, please(this was to get ideas. It failed.) Also, asked what ideas there were for performing exercises in a close space, probably 7-8x10 without any tools or anything (as preparation for actual cardio.)
I've lied to the forum in the past (Haha, how great is that. I made an anonymous account and lied about one of my problems because I was embarrassed by the fact that the people here DON'T know me. I think that's silly.) In my last post I claimed to be an alcoholic. Figured it was all the same, addiction this addiction that. I got advice, related to alcoholism. Don't get me wrong, I do like a drink every now and then. But that's just it. Every now and then. In reality I have a...wikipedia link? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pornography_addiction <---specifically of the internet variation.
Is that everything? Probably not, just what's bugging me at the time of posting. Thanks for the help, sorry for the crazy. Tried to get rid of it all in the first paragraph.
****The above is a joke, it would be much easier if I were just crazy. Seriously, I think I'd prefer the randomness of life when you constantly meander around proclaiming that a standard pair of socks can't slay wigglebums, and that screaming random obscenities at babies is the only way to purge the world of ghosts.*****
But in all seriousness, I need help. My medical insurance goes into effect in a couple of days at which time I assure you, and this is not to be taken lightly, but I will go see a therapist or a psychiatrist, or maybe a psychologist. Until then I'm just a bucket of crazy with a story--here goes.
"I've been evicted from my household!" Is what I want to say, but it's not really true. I've shipped off to college is the truth. In doing so I've moved a bit over a hundred miles (mostly uphill) from my family and friends (I'm lonely! Big surprise, right?) Not to mention I'm extremely anti-social and somewhat shy. Honestly, I lay in bed at night thinking of embarrassing moments from six years ago when I was still in high school (what the fuck, who does this? Well, other than me.) The friends I have where I used to live aren't particularly helpful either. In the end (after a mass-exodus of friends to college at the proper time [just out of high school.]) I was left with three friends; one a quintessential gamer whom is purely devoted to games and constantly chugs down a jug (literally a 1-gallon jug) of diet cola daily, another that was a bit of a player (would easily ditch us if it meant that he might get laid.) And the third isn't worth mentioning. Totally fucking useless, not really friends at all. Kind of people that if I call and try and talk to, they'd be more annoyed with the fact that I called than anything else and try hard to get off the phone as quickly as possible just because I'm not within 3 miles anymore. (sort of sad, I guess. Makes me wonder what I was to any of them.) I'm having a lot of trouble dealing with this fact--I don't really have any friends, and don't really remember the whole process of making friends nor do I want to be confused with some kind of stalker, or something.
I'm overweight. Last tally was roughly 340 pounds(quit positive it's only gotten worse.) I'm really clueless in the actions for weight loss--can devote the time but I have trouble staying motivated(that is to say that I easily lose track of time, I may sit down and start playing something and then, "whoosh!" What the, it's been five hours?") <---This is to the point where earlier this week I hadn't actually showered in over four days, was so busy watching anime and the like that by the time I thought to it was around 6 o'clock (I'd likely gotten up twelve hours before.) As far as the fitness thread in these forums goes--it's helpful, it's nice to know what's good to eat and what's bad, but that doesn't really help me as far as 1. Preparing it. I can cook, but what the hell do you combine brown rice with. 2. Serving size/how many times do you consume this serving daily, etc. Queries I've placed in the fitness thread have come up short, and I've asked multiple questions and occasionally been ignored (although I imagine that this is just due to the fast-pace of the thread and people just not noticing that this hasn't been answered yet.) 3. The main query I had in the thread was simply this: when trying to lose weight how much do you eat, when, and what; chart out a few days worth, please(this was to get ideas. It failed.) Also, asked what ideas there were for performing exercises in a close space, probably 7-8x10 without any tools or anything (as preparation for actual cardio.)
I've lied to the forum in the past (Haha, how great is that. I made an anonymous account and lied about one of my problems because I was embarrassed by the fact that the people here DON'T know me. I think that's silly.) In my last post I claimed to be an alcoholic. Figured it was all the same, addiction this addiction that. I got advice, related to alcoholism. Don't get me wrong, I do like a drink every now and then. But that's just it. Every now and then. In reality I have a...wikipedia link? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pornography_addiction <---specifically of the internet variation.
Is that everything? Probably not, just what's bugging me at the time of posting. Thanks for the help, sorry for the crazy. Tried to get rid of it all in the first paragraph.
It's a warm feeling when you realize that people share your views...
Sandra Lee and Rachel Ray raped food.
Lackadaisical on
0
Posts
In seriousness, I have felt the same way regarding friends. I have people who would be willing to hang out, but no one wants to make plans for the weekend unless I ask them. All I can say is that since you just moved into a new place you need to get out and just start talking with people. It may seem hard, I am shy as well, but just be friendly and ask people to get a meal or something. Or party.
Be a good cat, being willing to be friends, and sooner or later, someone will take you up on it.
"What ideas there were for performing exercises in a close space, probably 7-8x10 without any tools or anything?"
"Serving size/how many times do you consume x servings a day for a balanced diet, what has just the right combination of protein, vegetables, all that is important in life?"
"Do I need to go see a psychiatrist or whichever one can actually prescribe medical pills (can't remember?)
Meet with you PCP and see if they can help you with this or can recommend someone who can. Many hospitals have weight loss clinics where they discuss all options, not just surgery. You can also meet with a dietitian for help regarding meals and a personal trainer to help you get a good exercise routine going.
The first thing you need to do in terms of weight loss is start to pay real attention to what you eat. Write down everything you eat for a week and how much - you'll be supprised how many calories it really is. A site like www.fitday.com can be helpful for this.
The second thing you need to do is probably some simple weightlifting and/or simple cardio like walking around campus. Your campus probably has a free or reduced-for-students gym. There are lots of guides online to basic weights, and it's a solitary thing. You may be worried about your level but don't worry about it - most people lift very average weight unless they are huge jocks or body builders, and as a newbie you'll gain strength fast. Exercise is actually very good for your mental health as well as physical, and if you aren't feeling the most self confident right now, it's a great way to both work on the confindence problem and displace some of the energy you've got pent up. It will also tire you out and help you build routine.
You sound like you really need to work at building some routine. I would say your circumstances create a desire for escapism, so you get lost in games, amusements, probably sleep - which builds your negative circumstances, which builds your need for escape. If your routine is disrupted to the point that you are only showering once a week, I'd say you've got a severe problem. I went through a similar depressive phase and the only way I could cling to any structure was by making myself take a shower and leave the building once a day, no matter what. Go to the library and read a magazine, go to a free campus event, something. Hell, go to a class if that's what it takes. If you have to, literally set a timer when you game.
Friends wise, I hate to recommend other weeaboos as the solution to any kind of social problem, but there's probably campus gaming and anime clubs. And since you want to lose some weight, you could find a group exercise class like a martial art or ballroom dancing or something (don't laugh off this second one it is a workout and it does come in handy).
I host a podcast about movies.
1. Delete all your porn off your computer. All of it. Disconnect your computer from the internet and hide the cords. If you need to use the internet or write a paper, go to your campus computer lab. I'm assuming you're not about to look at pornography in public, so that will help with your addiction. Seeing a therapist will also help, but you probably do need to quit cold-turkey.
2. Don't game in your room. If you want to game, take your system to a lounge with a tv and play it there. People will often come to see what you're doing; smile, be friendly and let them know, not in too much detail. "What're you playing?" should be met with ""Shadow of the Colossus,' I really like it, my character's killing this giant things to bring his girlfriend back to life," or whatever, not a treatise. Most of the time, they'll hang out with you a bit because they're bored and flickering lights on the tv is entertaining, and you can chat. If you're playing games only on your computer, take a long break from them; if you're playing WoW or another RPG, give that shit up.
3. Do you have a meal plan? Start eating your meals in the cafeteria. There's almost always healthy options if you look. A turkey sandwich on wheat bread with tomato and lettuce is a pretty great lunch, available almost everywhere. When you get your lunch, go find a table with a small group of people around it and ask if you can sit there. Same deal as with the gaming: chat, be friendly but don't over-explain, smile. If you see someone reading a book that isn't obviously for a class (or if they don't seem to be in a hurry), ask what they're reading. Talk about the classes you're taking, the professors, the shittiness of the cafeteria food, whatever.
4. GO TO YOUR CLASSES. ALL OF THEM. EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO. Seriously, just having the routine of getting yourself up, showered, and off to class will help you tremendously. Your days have no structure, so it's easy for you to spend all day gaming and reeking and not going outside. Go to class, participate as much as humanly possible, do all your reading, put your very best effort into your assignments. It sounds like you desperately need a sense of purpose. You're there to get an education, right? So get the best damn education you can squeeze out of your school.
Being bored and lonely, I turned to my highschool joy, tech theatre (stage crew, lighting, etc) and got a real basic 10 hour/week job (yay $5.15 minimum wage). It also required me to be at campus at random times in the day. The best part of it (in retrospect of course) was that I had a set schedule. I would get up at 6:00 am, shower, eat, go to campus in time for a 7:30 class and stay there until at least 5 pm (or 11 pm... or 2 am during an unfortunate period where I had a major project due AND rehearsals to run sound for).
Once I got into a habit, things became much better. Sure, I was now in a group of people usually leaning on extroverted, but there was still a great benefit, internally, to a set schedule. I didn't want to skip class or work because it was all part of a set.
Of course, I did say screw it and moved back to Northern VA to finish my degree after the first year, but that's not the point. Infact, when I got here I lost my schedule and things did go downhill a bit as a result.
Murphy's Paradox: The more you plan, the more that can go wrong. The less you plan, the less likely your plan will succeed.