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The Dailyshow/Colbert Report: "Where Roe V Wade is two ways to get across a river."

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  • OmeksOmeks Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    I just saw the Bush Press Conference bit.

    The best part:

    Bush: What do you want me to do? Land Air Force One in Katrina?

    Me: Uh, I don't think that's a very--

    Bush: I mean first you'd have to clear a runway and then all the police would be interrupted and forget that we'd be out of peanuts on the plane. Also, what if a wheel ran over somebody? Then we'd really be in trouble. Not to mention we don't pay the pilot to take us off course and...

    Me: Dear God, he's actually put thought into this...

    Omeks on
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  • EndEnd Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Omeks wrote: »
    I just saw the Bush Press Conference bit.

    The best part:

    Bush: What do you want me to do? Land Air Force One in Katrina?

    Me: Uh, I don't think that's a very--

    Bush: I mean first you'd have to clear a runway and then all the police would be interrupted and forget that we'd be out of peanuts on the plane. Also, what if a wheel ran over somebody? Then we'd really be in trouble. Not to mention we don't pay the pilot to take us off course and...

    Me: Dear God, he's actually put thought into this...

    People in the audience were laughing.

    Me, I was D:

    End on
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  • enlightenedbumenlightenedbum Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Omeks wrote: »
    I just saw the Bush Press Conference bit.

    The best part:

    Bush: What do you want me to do? Land Air Force One in Katrina?

    Me: Uh, I don't think that's a very--

    Bush: I mean first you'd have to clear a runway and then all the police would be interrupted and forget that we'd be out of peanuts on the plane. Also, what if a wheel ran over somebody? Then we'd really be in trouble. Not to mention we don't pay the pilot to take us off course and...

    Me: Dear God, he's actually put thought into this...

    To be fair, I recall making exactly this point about McCain being down there during the RNC and Obama making this point on why he wasn't going down there immediately. The problem with the quote is how he saw his job as public relations and not, you know, governing.

    enlightenedbum on
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  • JustinSane07JustinSane07 __BANNED USERS regular
    edited January 2009
    BEES! BZZZZZZ BEES!

    Oh my god, I was laughing so hard.

    JustinSane07 on
  • MKRMKR Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Booo, reruns.

    MKR on
  • OmeksOmeks Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    BEES! BZZZZZZ BEES!

    Oh my god, I was laughing so hard.

    Sir, all you alright?

    No. I'm very dead.

    Also: Crasssshhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

    Omeks on
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  • enlightenedbumenlightenedbum Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    I wonder if any guest has been on more frequently that Fareed Zakaria. Seems like he shows up 3/4 times a year.

    enlightenedbum on
    Herbert Hoover got 40% of the vote in 1932. Friendly reminder.
    Warren 2020
  • oldmankenoldmanken Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    I <3 Zakaria

    oldmanken on
  • RecklessReckless Registered User
    edited January 2009
    Same. Dude knows how the world works and he's the only reason I ever open a copy of Newsweek.

    Reckless on
  • JustinSane07JustinSane07 __BANNED USERS regular
    edited January 2009
    I must have those coins.

    Then I have to buy gum with them.

    Edit: PK Winsum rocks.

    JustinSane07 on
  • RecklessReckless Registered User
    edited January 2009
    Also, lots of pinstripe suits tonight.

    Reckless on
  • JustinSane07JustinSane07 __BANNED USERS regular
    edited January 2009
    Okay, fuck those coins.

    I MUST HAVE THOSE PLATES!

    JustinSane07 on
  • CouscousCouscous Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    What are the chances he decides to actually make those plates due to demand?

    Couscous on
  • OmeksOmeks Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Couscous wrote: »
    What are the chances he decides to actually make those plates due to demand?

    That depends. Will he be able to get enough $100 John F. Kennedy plates to paint over?

    Omeks on
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  • NailbunnyPDNailbunnyPD Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Jragghen wrote: »
    Comedy Central going HD. Looks like TDS/TCR will be upconverted initially, but will become HD eventually. For those who care.

    I care!

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  • ForarForar #432 Toronto, Ontario, CanadaRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    I don't care if it's been done a million times before, the bit with Ken and Barbie was glorious. I expected him to stop with his patented "caught in the act" look.

    I didn't expect him to bend "Ken" over and have "Barbie" do him from behind.

    I laughed so hard I cried.

    Forar on
    First they came for the Muslims, and we said NOT TODAY, MOTHERFUCKER!
  • VyolynceVyolynce Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    I must have those coins.

    Then I have to buy gum with them.

    Edit: PK Winsum rocks.

    I don't know who's in SNL's cast these days, but Tim Meadows probably would have done a great Obama. I remember when he "auditioned" for the role of Clinton. :D

    Vyolynce on
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  • SheepSheep Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    edited January 2009
    Forar wrote: »
    I don't care if it's been done a million times before, the bit with Ken and Barbie was glorious. I expected him to stop with his patented "caught in the act" look.

    I didn't expect him to bend "Ken" over and have "Barbie" do him from behind.

    I laughed so hard I cried.

    Wha?

    I must have missed that. That Ladies Man guy came on and I promptly changed the channel.

    Sheep on
  • cheezcheez Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Sheep wrote: »
    Forar wrote: »
    I don't care if it's been done a million times before, the bit with Ken and Barbie was glorious. I expected him to stop with his patented "caught in the act" look.

    I didn't expect him to bend "Ken" over and have "Barbie" do him from behind.

    I laughed so hard I cried.

    Wha?

    I must have missed that. That Ladies Man guy came on and I promptly changed the channel.

    It was during the Kerry bit.

    cheez on
  • TheBlackWindTheBlackWind Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Sheep wrote: »
    Forar wrote: »
    I don't care if it's been done a million times before, the bit with Ken and Barbie was glorious. I expected him to stop with his patented "caught in the act" look.

    I didn't expect him to bend "Ken" over and have "Barbie" do him from behind.

    I laughed so hard I cried.

    Wha?

    I must have missed that. That Ladies Man guy came on and I promptly changed the channel.

    It was on TDS, not Colbert.

    TheBlackWind on
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  • ForarForar #432 Toronto, Ontario, CanadaRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Whoops, I had mentioned Stewart in there, but edited it out while rewriting my comment.

    Forar on
    First they came for the Muslims, and we said NOT TODAY, MOTHERFUCKER!
  • TheBlackWindTheBlackWind Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Also, just got around to watching the UT 3rd Better Know a District. As a former resident, it was particularly great. Definitely one of his best.

    TheBlackWind on
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  • oldmankenoldmanken Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Oh man, Bethany Mclean is on the Daily Show tonight... *swoon*

    oldmanken on
  • ScalfinScalfin __BANNED USERS regular
    edited January 2009
    I think Jon just won WWII.

    Scalfin on
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  • OmeksOmeks Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    I will forever hate John McCain for bringing Joe the Plumber into relevance.

    Did he really have to be sent to Israel so we could hear his moronic ramblings from another part of the world?

    Omeks on
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  • ScalfinScalfin __BANNED USERS regular
    edited January 2009
    Omeks wrote: »
    I will forever hate John McCain for bringing Joe the Plumber into relevance.

    Did he really have to be sent to Israel so we could hear his moronic ramblings from another part of the world?

    On the upside, they know Krav Maga and hate anything that strikes them as stupid.

    Scalfin on
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  • KalTorakKalTorak One way or another, they all end up in the Undercity.Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Scalfin wrote: »
    Omeks wrote: »
    I will forever hate John McCain for bringing Joe the Plumber into relevance.

    Did he really have to be sent to Israel so we could hear his moronic ramblings from another part of the world?

    On the upside, they know Krav Maga and hate anything that strikes them as stupid.

    Plus the guy on CNN (Rick Sanchez?) owned him pretty hard for that quote about war journalists.

    KalTorak on
  • NailbunnyPDNailbunnyPD Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    KalTorak wrote: »
    Scalfin wrote: »
    Omeks wrote: »
    I will forever hate John McCain for bringing Joe the Plumber into relevance.

    Did he really have to be sent to Israel so we could hear his moronic ramblings from another part of the world?

    On the upside, they know Krav Maga and hate anything that strikes them as stupid.

    Plus the guy on CNN (Rick Sanchez?) owned him pretty hard for that quote about war journalists.

    Rick Sanchez doesn't have any credibility to own anyone. Its like saying Giraldo Rivera owned someone.

    For reference, do a TDS search on Rick Sanchez.

    Rick Sanchez was on Channel Seven news in Miami while I was in grades 7-12. He was as much a hack then as he is now.

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  • MKRMKR Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    He always acts like he's high on something.

    MKR on
  • KalTorakKalTorak One way or another, they all end up in the Undercity.Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    KalTorak wrote: »
    Scalfin wrote: »
    Omeks wrote: »
    I will forever hate John McCain for bringing Joe the Plumber into relevance.

    Did he really have to be sent to Israel so we could hear his moronic ramblings from another part of the world?

    On the upside, they know Krav Maga and hate anything that strikes them as stupid.

    Plus the guy on CNN (Rick Sanchez?) owned him pretty hard for that quote about war journalists.

    Rick Sanchez doesn't have any credibility to own anyone. Its like saying Giraldo Rivera owned someone.

    For reference, do a TDS search on Rick Sanchez.

    Rick Sanchez was on Channel Seven news in Miami while I was in grades 7-12. He was as much a hack then as he is now.

    Eh, I don't really care who said it, as long as it gets said.

    KalTorak on
  • OmeksOmeks Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    KalTorak wrote: »
    Scalfin wrote: »
    Omeks wrote: »
    I will forever hate John McCain for bringing Joe the Plumber into relevance.

    Did he really have to be sent to Israel so we could hear his moronic ramblings from another part of the world?

    On the upside, they know Krav Maga and hate anything that strikes them as stupid.

    Plus the guy on CNN (Rick Sanchez?) owned him pretty hard for that quote about war journalists.

    Rick Sanchez doesn't have any credibility to own anyone. Its like saying Giraldo Rivera owned someone.

    For reference, do a TDS search on Rick Sanchez.

    Rick Sanchez was on Channel Seven news in Miami while I was in grades 7-12. He was as much a hack then as he is now.

    Yeah, but he has come a long way since Jon would make fun of him for being tazered and waterboarded.

    That doesn't mean I think he's a credible dude, but I am glad he's willing to go out there and call Joe on his bullshit.

    Omeks on
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  • VariableVariable Mouth Congress Stroke Me Lady FameRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    TIm Meadows was funny the other night. A little weak but the free at last part made up for it.

    Variable on
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  • VyolynceVyolynce Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Last night's "credits" had me dying on the floor. :D

    Vyolynce on
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  • ShadowenShadowen Snores in the morning Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Quite.

    Shadowen on
  • PantsBPantsB Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    I wonder if any guest has been on more frequently that Fareed Zakaria. Seems like he shows up 3/4 times a year.

    McCain probably

    PantsB on
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  • enlightenedbumenlightenedbum Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    PantsB wrote: »
    I wonder if any guest has been on more frequently that Fareed Zakaria. Seems like he shows up 3/4 times a year.

    McCain probably

    I think he's at 12 or 13. My guess would be Fareed's been on more frequently.

    enlightenedbum on
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  • ForarForar #432 Toronto, Ontario, CanadaRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Oh... oh my god... Stewart was great, but Colbert... no... just... noooooo!

    Forar on
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  • OmeksOmeks Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    I think it would have made more sense to have had a emotional breakdown at the sight of Bush's helicopter leaving Washington.

    Omeks on
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  • AegisAegis Not Quite TorontoRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    <3 Stewart. You never fail me with the Strangelove reference.

    Aegis on
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  • VariableVariable Mouth Congress Stroke Me Lady FameRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    the remix segment was gold.

    "I am a gay american". I wish someone would use the clip of him on daily show years ago saying 'I am an american moslem' from when those commercials were always on. if it's even anywhere to be found.

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