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Coalition of the Illin' [Canadian Politics]
ChicoBlue
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
CANADA
The True North strong and free!
We just had an election a few weeks ago, did you know that?
The Conservatives maintained a minority government.
What is a minority government?
Is it when a minority takes over the government, like what happened down south?
No, silly. There aren't any minorities in Canada. They don't call it "The Great White North" for nothing.
Oh wait, gays are a minority, aren't they? Well, they don't matter, anyway. We gave them the right to get married, and in exchange, they've agreed to stay hidden away in their horrible gay grottoes.
Let's say that Canadians get to vote on which political party gets the most pie. Usually, one party gets a really big piece of pie, and gets to hold it over the other parties' heads and say, "Nyah nyah. We get to call all the shots now, because even if you combined all your pieces of pie it still wouldn't be bigger than our piece of pie, jerkfaces." But, in a minority government, the party in charge didn't get a really big piece of pie, and the other parties could very well combine their pieces of pie to form a bigger piece of pie than that of the leading party party pie pie canadian pie pie.
What are the political parties and who leads them?
The Conservatives!
They like things the way they used to be. They also like money.
(Holding 143 seats)
Lead by Stephen Harper
- Is our Prime Minister
- Is from Alberta (where all the oil and money money is)
- Is super pissed right now
The Liberals!
They are the middle of the road, politically speaking.
(Holding 77 seats)
Lead by Stephane Dion
- Is the Leader of the Royal Opposition
- Will soon be ousted as leader of the Liberal Party
- Has a hard time speaking English
- Has got nothing
The New Democratic Party!
They are socialists. They love everything that Conservatives hate.
(Holding 37 seats)
Lead by Jack Layton
- Has a moustache
- Likes bikes
- Hates [vidurl=
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I7bkaMAyZAM]Big Ass[/vidurl]- Loves Asian women
The Bloc Québécois!
They want Quebec to be its own nation. For 245 years these damn Frenchies have been pressured into accepting proud, proper, British based culture, but some of them are still holding out.
(Holding 49 seats)
Lead by Gilles Dueceppe
- Shhhhhh
- Hates Canada
- Loves Quebec
- Speaks English better than Stephane Dion
- Reeks of fish
- Trent fucking hates the Bloc so much. "Also, under Bloc you should mention how they want to separate and be their own country but still get the billions of dollars in revenue from the rest of the country they aren't part of anymore."
the green party
(NO SEATS, SON)
The Green Party is yet another left-leaning political party, but they are distinct from other leftist parties for being fiscally conservative. Their main project is to help the environment, so it was rather convenient that green was still available.
The party is currently led by this fly woman right here
ELIZABETH MAY
-A woman
-Leader of the Greens
-Single mother
-Owns many scarves
If you would like to see our leaders go at it in the House of Commons, you can see the sessions at http://www.cpac.ca/
Did you know that The Liberals, The New Democrats and the Bloc Québécois hate Stephen Harper sooooo much that they are planning on forming a coalition to overthrow the Conservatives?
Well, they are.
The New Democrats and the Liberals have agreed to work together until 2011, if the government holds up that long.
The Bloc Québécois have agreed to support this coalition for 18 months.
Stephen Harper is going to try his very best to stop this unholy union from happening.
How is he going to do this?
Well, he could try to suspend parliament until January 26th, and let the whole situation cool off.
He could try to call an election.
He could cry a lot.
But, he's the Prime Minister. What do I mean by try? Shouldn't he be able to just do this shit?
If he wants to call an election or suspend parliament he's gotta get approval from the Governor-General.
Michaëlle Jean
This sexy lady represents the Queen.
She is what keeps the Prime Minister in check when he tries to grab too much power.
Some parts of Canada are saying, "Hey, what the fuck? We voted the Conservatives in to lead us! This isn't cool!"
Other parts of Canada are saying, "YEEEEEEEAH! FUCK HARPER!"
What are YOU saying?
Rick Mercer rants.
ChicoBlue on
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kpop appreciation station i also like to tweet some
I made a TD for iphone and windows phone!
I made a TD for iphone and windows phone!
He has a grey suit, grey hair, grey tie and grey eyes
like watching a car crash
First to Pass the Post.
Which is lovely.
Because that means a political party doesn't need the popular vote majority to get a House majority.
Woooo
NEVER MIND I'LL DO IT
not a single damn seat
Like the Green Party matters.
The Green Party is yet another left-leaning political party, but they are distinct from other leftist parties for being fiscally conservative. Their main project is to help the environment, so it was rather convenient that green was still available.
The party is currently led by this fly woman right here
ELIZABETH MAY
-A woman
-Leader of the Greens
-Single mother
-Owns many scarves[/spoiler]
Oh, we used to have that here, but now we have this weird thing with one party vote and one electorate vote but they can still form weird ass coalitions (last time around the major party in the government had less vote % than the other main party, but they had a bunch of minor parties form a coalition so they were still in power). tldr: FPP can end up just as stupid as other systems
kpop appreciation station i also like to tweet some
Oh man.
It's disgusting. Like, in order to actually ascribe to their platform you would have to be either a complete asshole or insane.
I'm dead serious.
Basically most of the other provinces make tons of money from oil etc, Quebec makes fucking NOTHING, but they get all the social programs and buttloads of money dumped on them every year and they have a better set up than the provinces that do all the work.
AND they want to leave and be their own country, so people sort of said, "Ok, fine, go then, how the hell would you survive?"
"OH, because we are going to keep taking your fucking money you make for us, but we're too good to actually be part of you, just the money though we like that."
I made a TD for iphone and windows phone!
Also we have a communist party.
Do that one too
I made a TD for iphone and windows phone!
It's so terrifying, but so entertaining.
Harper screams something at the top of his lungs and sits down.
The Conservatives stand up, hoot and applaud.
Dion screams something at the top of his lungs, stuttering and all sounding like Kermit the Frog and sits down.
The Liberals stand up, hoot and applaud.
I respect our leaders so much.
I am for this too! It's ridiculous the special treatment we give them. We have tons and tons of nations within Canada, but they don't rail against the government. I think we should give the First Nations their owns province before we let Quebec separate.
I am not quite sure that they would want that!
Click on the bottom video, the Rant. It explains pretty well what's going on.
Who cares what they want it's a nice gesture
I totally agree, unfortunately because of THIS they might get their fucking way.
I made a TD for iphone and windows phone!
I made a TD for iphone and windows phone!
I may have been wrong about the First Nations Province, they might not want it. My point is that I don't want separatists separating from Canada, and becoming separate.
if they actually got their way they would quickly come crawling back with their tails between their legs once they realize they are a fucking useless territory and that they need Canada or they are fucked proper
Montreal fuckin' rocks.
May could get a fancy seat on the Senate and one in the cabinet.
And the other parties are all playing into their hand. Being that I support the Conservatives, it makes me chuckle.
no harper is just dumb and went too far and got slapped the fuck down
Canada: Practically the 51st State
Canada: The U.S.'s Hat
Also, this entire affair has made me realize that the only person with any fucking balls right now Duceppe because at least he's honest about what he wants. The rest of them are lying through their teeth.