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I have just read the funniest newspaper article, and it's not even in The Onion
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Little Hitler's unhappy birthday
No cake for three-year-old Adolf in latest instance of parents naming and shaming their children
Heath Campbell, left, with his wife Deborah and son Adolf Hitler, three. Photograph: Rich Schultz/AP
A three-year-old boy called Adolf Hitler Campbell has been refused a birthday cake with his name on it by a New Jersey supermarket.
Heath Campbell, 35, and his wife, Deborah, 25, say they are upset at the decision made by their local ShopRite not to write "Happy Birthday Adolf Hitler" across the cake, and that people needed to move forward.
Campbell said he named his son after Adolf Hitler because "no one else in the world would have that name".
"They need to accept a name. A name's a name. The kid isn't going to grow up and do what [Hitler] did," he said.
Not to be defeated, the family ended up getting their cake decorated at a Walmart in Pennsylvania.
The problem is likely to be one they face again – their younger children are JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell, who is nearly two, and Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell, named after the SS head Heinrich Himmler. Honszlynn turns one in April.
Is this the most inappropriate – or unfair – naming of children you have heard of? There was, of course, the case in July this year of a nine-year-old girl from New Zealand whose parents called her Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii. A lawyer acting for the girl claimed she was so embarrassed she told friends her name was "K" instead.
She was placed into court guardianship so her name could be changed after judge Rob Murfit ruled it had set her up with a "social disability and handicap".
He went on to signal his concern about other names given to children, including Violence, Midnight Chardonnay and Number 16 Bus Shelter. There was a set of twins named Benson and Hedges.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/blog/2008/dec/17/adolf-hitler-birthday-new-jersey
I laughed until I cried at those names.
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hahahaha "shake and shoot applicator"
Tossrock: Somolia, you know Mogadishu, Blackhawk down?
Qorzm: I'm sorry, I don't follow hip-hop
The reporter was like verbally shitting on the mob.
"(Tony Spaghetti) claimed that the weapon he brandished was no more than a pellet gun. What's this? The mob has gotten so soft they don't carry real guns anymore?"
man i'd love to name my kids Sachs and Violens. obscure 80s mature comics go!
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holy shit does this name rule or what
it's like in apocalypse films everyone is name like kitkat or heinz 57 varieties
this kid is like ahead of the trend
What's wrong with Stallion.
lol
Some people huh?
many of these are the titles of r kelly's new hit single
I'd spell it different though probably
Ceksfrute Manizza
it's already taken, right graves 8-)
Czeksfrute
Or maybe even Czekzfrute
it is pretty clear that these people are giant white supremacists
Snorts coke off her aryan ass
color me fucking surprised
i'm sorry, but i'm going to have to sterilize you
The premises for Onion articles are funny.
I would bet that Wolf Parade Lawson will have a good life because his name is 100% awesome
it blows
i used to hate it so much but
might just be the best
I love this one
Fixed.