To dorm or not to dorm?

TwoQuestions

I'm gonna be a senior next year in college, and I've never lived in the dorms, instead living with my mother the whole time. Now, all I do is work and go to school, and nothing else. I have a few people I say hi to in class, but nobody I see when we're free of our lecturer's iron grip, including weekends. I've looked at threads in here, and joined the anime club, which has helped my social situation somewhat, but I need to do something a bit more rash if I'm going to graduate not a social retard.

I'm neither annoying nor bad looking, so it's not like I put people off, I just never see anyone for anything except for assignments or work.

So...would moving to the dorms be for me? I'm 22 right now, but I can look younger by shaving my goatee (I look very much like my avatar).

Would federal financial aid let me take out more loans/get more grants for not living with his mom? Money isn't much of a problem for me, as I'm probably joining the Air Force or Navy as an officer after I graduate.

This forum is usually very helpful on these matters, so what are your thoughts?

musanman

Just out of curiousity, where in Ohio.

TwoQuestions

BGSU, sorry I didn't mention it in the OP.

MrMonroe

Also are there other seniors living in the dorms or have most of the upperclassmen moved off campus?

musanman

Being your age I think living in an apartment complex with some upperclassmen might be more appropriate. You might be able to find roomate ads for locals looking for a 4th or something. I went to Miami, and it could be different at BG but mostly dorms are freshman / sophomores.

Ash of Yew

Dorms are a lot of fun, at least freshman year they were for me (I dropped out). I think its definately worth it if you want to socialize. We did have one senior guy on our floor of pretty much all freshmen, and he had a single and never really came out that no one really liked, so just don't be like that guy. Also, leave your door open when you're in there so people can just pop in, unless you're really busy or whatever.

I assume you've at least been to some of the dorms at your school so you probably have an idea what they are like already.

TwoQuestions

musanman wrote: »

Being your age I think living in an apartment complex with some upperclassmen might be more appropriate. You might be able to find roomate ads for locals looking for a 4th or something. I went to Miami, and it could be different at BG but mostly dorms are freshman / sophomores.

There are upperclassmen dorms, given that the apartment complexes are shit expensive around here.

To Ash, I've been in a few dorms working with classmates, and I loved every second of them. I was working on a project one time with a classmate, hated spending more time with this person, but I didn't want to leave because that would be leaving all the other people I talked to while there. It was more casual conversation than I had all year!

If I do this I'm probably buying a few Xbox 360 controllers and Wiimotes for guests. So I have no intention of being that guy

Merkwurdigliebe Ph.D

Dorms have the mixed blessing that is everybody trying to be friendly at the beginning of the year. Especially if Freshman will be in the dorm as well, everybody is going to be real outgoing and friendly for at least the first month and likely well into the year. It's nice in that you really will socialize a lot. I stinks in that you don't have an off switch if it gets tiresome. Basically, there will be a weird guy that means well but hangs around too much. Not to mention dorm life isn't the necessarily the best thing for studying.

It's certainly a great experience, but there's a reason that people only do it for one year. If the prospect of all of this is exciting to you and you realize the risks, go for it. Loans are obtainable, but you'll never be an undergrad again.

VisionOfClarity

Unless you go to a small college where everyone lives in dorms it is very weird for a senior to live in a dorm. It looks like your school offers upperclassmen dorms separate from the underclassmen but I'd still go for the on-campus apartment because of comfort reasons.

Also, you might get more money but your cost is most likely going to double and it's unlikely your aid will. Living on campus is ungodly expensive.

LibrarianThorne

I stayed in dorms all four years I was at Ohio University. They were, for me, comparably expensive to the apartments (dorms cheaper on rent, but didn't include internet/cable/utilities) while having the advantage of being a 15 min. walk from downtown and anywhere in city I wanted to be.

I got to meet a lot of cool dudes in the dorm my senior year, and it's a truly fantastic way to meet people. Moving into a dorm without knowing someone to move in with can be a hassle (I had 2 years of awful roomies, and 2 years of fucking amazing roomies, neither case was consecutive) but if you get matched up with someone cool it can be a great 9 months.

Dark_Side

I don't know man, I'm going to echo previous advice in that you'd probably do much better finding roommates and staying in an apartment type place. I only did true dorm living for 2 years, and then lived off campus in a house for awhile, and then lived in campus apartments. Hands down the campus apartments were the greatest of them all, they retained a lot of that dorm like atmosphere without a lot of the bullshit that comes with it.

I think when you've gotten to the point of being an upper classmen, you don't have as much time for all the shenanigans involved in dorm life. For one, community bathrooms can be the pits. There were times I went to take a shower only to find some son of a bitch had puked all over every stall. The cheap ass furniture (beds) and lack of space were always a problem too, as well as dealing with other annoying dorm residents. Floorwide drama can be hilarious but annoying, and euros playing god awful techno at all hours of the day was the bane of my existence. Also, no kitchen.

I'm not trying to doom and gloom you, but if you're willing to put up with these kinds of things, then go for it, but I say apartment would be a much better fit. Dorm life is fun, but I say it's only something you should really do when you're a freshman.

illig

DO IT...

i lived at home freshman year but decided to suck it up and pay for housing for the remainder of my undergrad... and it was the best decision i could've made

my best friends to this day (and likely for a long time in the future) are the ones i met in dorms

Oski

You might try alternative living arrangements. Here at Cal we have these things that are basically converted frat and sorority houses. My 25 year old friend lives in one. It allows you to get the same social atmosphere (with people around your age, as the ones who live there tend to be upperclassmen) as a dorm but you don't have to deal with no drinking/no drugs/having an ra bitch at you or anything.

Sentry

If you can live in an upper-class hall, yes, do it. If they just shove you in with Freshmen and Sophmores, you aren't going to get enough out of it for it to be worthwhile.

You may be the guy that gets arrested for providing alcohol to minors though.

anoffday

I lived in a dorm for a year, and it was alright. I like my privacy, and if you live in a dorm you will never get any.

MichaelLC

I would definitely live in some kind of dorm/apartment for your last year.

Pretty much for all the reasons above, social aspects, learning to live with others, budgeting. Sure you might end up with some shitty roommates eating your food or spying on you during sex, but then you can come in here & bitch about it.

TwoQuestions

Thank you all for your comments thus far. The Help/Advice forum lives up to its name as always. I'm asking one of my friends who's my age if she thinks it's weird if a 23 year old lives in the dorms, so we'll see how that goes. We have a lot of out-of-state students who don't want to get tied down with a rental contract, so being with people my age shouldn't be a problem. And if I get roomed with a 19 year old, so much the better. I'm about at a 17 year old's social competence, so there probably wouldn't be that much of an age issue.

To those warning about privacy, thanks for the warning, but I've had enough of that for a lifetime or three. I'm not going to socially catch up with people my age by running the same pace as them, I have to run faster. A lack of privacy would be just the thing to get that started.

Thanks again guys

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JaysonFour

Definately go for a dorm, as long as you can find one for students above 21.

Over where I'm going, there's a dorm that won't let anyone under Junior status or the age of 21 get a room there. It's quieter, more sane, and not as bad as the other dorms. (each suite has a living/study room, a bedroom, and private bath. Thank anything.)

Communal bathrooms are horrible. Make sure you get your own bathroom/shower.

Virum

I hate the dorms at CSU Northridge. Gate closures, guest registration policy, etc. Lots of hassles that aren't worth it, and the fact that rooming up with somebody off campus is way cheaper.

I'm an RA and my housing is free and I don't think it is worth it.

Basically, make sure there aren't any policies you aren't willing to deal with.

ASimPerson

What kind of dorms are they? Are they the traditional two dudes to a room with community bathroom? Are they suites? Or are they full on apartments, with a full size fridge, 1-2 bathrooms per person, etc.?

What are the on-campus living policies? For instance, some campuses don't allow alcohol, even if you are of age.

I went through the dorm progression mentioned above. My freshman year was relatively social, but it dropped off like a rock after that. I never met my neighbors my sophomore year onwards. I don't regret it, because I had roommates by then. Do you have any friends or acquaintances that would be will to room with you on or off campus? This can make it a lot more bearable.

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Sam

it depends on the dorm culture as well. there are dorms where people don't really want to know each other and treat it more or less like an apartment, with maybe slightly better relations with more neighbors. There are party dorms that are essentially one giant party where everyone hangs out with each other (downside is you will encounter a lot of shady/fake/soon to drop out people)
if you live in an arts dorm there will be a lot of hippie/music/activist stuff as well as a lot of gay pride events (and guys hanging around in drag)

Those are the 3 basic dorm profiles, and I'm sure combinations exist but there it is. Obviously the party dorm is more freshman oriented. If you go to an upperclassmen dorm you may find it somewhat less ubiquitously social.

In all honesty it's worth going for it as long as you can make sure you're not going to be surrounded by Freshman. If you are you could still make friends and get laid, but it'll take charisma to make up for the fact that you're a senior amongst them (and some will never get over it) and beyond that, you'll be around people who are new to the whole no rules thing, probably taking all easy classes that their instructors don't give a shit about and were attending high school assemblies last spring.

As for campus policies...they only start to wear on you after you've been there a while. They're quite easy to adapt to and not the end of the world-afaik there aren't any dorms at secular universities that have curfews, and alcohol prohibition works about as well as it did when society tried it elsewhere, and in dorms they are merely a formality because dorms are staffed by people who live there, and everyone who lives in a dorm is likely to either drink or have best friends who drink.
Registering guests and ID scanners to get in is annoying. That kind of stuff didn't piss me off until I'd been there 2 years and I was sick and tired of being treated like an intruder in my domicile when I forgot my ID or was in a hurry or whatever.

Eat it You Nasty Pig.

I wouldn't do it if it means living with freshman/sophmores. The age difference is pretty significant, and they won't quite know how to handle you.

If it's upperclassmen dorms (or some sort of graduate apartment situation) I say go for it. Dorms are a blast.

DarkSymphony

i pretty much have the same issue. I'm 26, going to college finally and all that. I wanna live in the dorms, but not with 18-19 year olds. there *are* on campus apartments which is awesome, but they're about 5 miles away from campus which sucks.

to be on topic for the OP though, it seems as though if you have the option to live on campus with people a little older than 19 then you should go for it. I know I'm going to, I just gotta figure out if that's even an option where I am and I don't think it is.

VisionOfClarity

TwoQuestions wrote: »

Thank you all for your comments thus far. The Help/Advice forum lives up to its name as always. I'm asking one of my friends who's my age if she thinks it's weird if a 23 year old lives in the dorms, so we'll see how that goes. We have a lot of out-of-state students who don't want to get tied down with a rental contract, so being with people my age shouldn't be a problem. And if I get roomed with a 19 year old, so much the better. I'm about at a 17 year old's social competence, so there probably wouldn't be that much of an age issue.

To those warning about privacy, thanks for the warning, but I've had enough of that for a lifetime or three. I'm not going to socially catch up with people my age by running the same pace as them, I have to run faster. A lack of privacy would be just the thing to get that started.

Thanks again guys

You don't want to be that guy. The lonely, sad loserish Senior who hangs with Freshmen because he doesn't have friends his own age. The one people invite over because he's the only one who is old enough to buy booze. Don't be that guy.

DarkSymphony

I agree with that statement, but if the OP has friends that range from the 19 crowd all the way up to the late 20's crowd, I don't figure hanging out with freshman at college would be a big issue. I guess it would look odd to them though.

TwoQuestions

I just did some more research, and we do have upperclassmen-only dorms at my college. I already know some of the people I would be living with, and I've spent some time at their place and I really think I could live there. It's also a party college, so I don't think it will be too formal.

Thanks for all the advice guys! Definitely doing it.