Rediscovering My Faith

Kyougu

Okay, self admitted agnostic here.

Grew up as Catholic, though I always found going to church as something I HAD to do, not something I wanted to do. That's probably why as soon as I got old enough to say I didn't want to go, I didn't have to go anymore. Little by little I stopped caring about church and religion, and just became agnostic. None the less part of me still believed in God and actually admired people who had enough faith and will to really believe in God and what not.

Fast Forward to now. I'm in a new city, with no friends, and have lately felt the lonely, wanting to be part of a community. Combined this with my musings about God and I have been debating attending church. Though not catholic church specifically, just any church in general.

My main obstacle is that I don't know if being lonely is the best reason to seek out church. That, and one of my biggest qualms with religion has been how unnacepting it can be to anything and anyone that's not with them. I'm not sure if I could participate in something that says being homosexual is evil, or that they're THE religion, and everyone else is like them. Not all religions are like that though, are they?

So yeah, basically I'm just seeking general advice. Maybe particular church to visits? I'm in the Plano/Dallas area.

OhtheVogonity

I see where you're coming from with wanting to meet people, but I urge you not to join up with a church/religion on that basis alone. I think it would ultimately end poorly if you were not being intellectually honest with yourself and just started dabbling in spirituality for the sake of company. Now, I noticed that you said that it's been in your thoughts lately, so I'm not going to assume this is just a move based on social needs, but I think you ought make a decision like this with very clear eyes.

That said, I'm an atheist and don't have a terribly high opinion of most religions. Any Abrahmic religion (Judaism, Christianity, Islam, etc.) will insist that their path is the only true one and all others are false prophets or what have you. In my limited understanding, Buddhism is very accepting and tolerant. But I can't really speak too much to the tendencies of other eastern religions.

Best of luck!

Entriech

I'd say if you're feeling lonely and looking for a venue to connect with people in, volunteer for some sort of local charity, or get involved in some sort of community organization. There are doubtless plenty of places you could volunteer your time that would appreciate the help, and in turn you could meet some fellow locals who felt the same as you.

theclam

Find a Unitarian church. They're pretty open.

TexiKen

Religion can be the constant in your life with which to anchor yourself when everything else turns to shit, so it makes sense to try and use that to help get you started off in a new town. But realize going in that your first goal is to help in righting yourself (getting in touch with your faith), doing good (not being a dick), and then finding people to meet.

Any church or religion that is uncaring to those who don't follow them lock step is not the right church. It is also not right to plaster all churches that way; you haven't found the right one yet. It took me a few churches to find the right one. I was raised Catholic, went to a Catholic university, and am currently participating in lent, but I don't attend church regularly nor do I agree with 100% of what the church teaches. I have no problems with teh gheys, believe in evolution, and believe in birth control to a point (you can use condoms and birth control but if you get the girl pregnant even after all that, keep the kid), but I also wouldn't call myself a devout Catholic like some would who don't follow the religion to a T (like our speaker of the house).

But you see, that's the thing. You don't have to agree 100% or lie to yourself about what is and isn't a perfect follower of a religion, nor do you get more God-points for attending church or quoting scripture if the rest of the time you act like a complete dick. And many pastors and priests will welcome you without being judgmental, because at least you're wanting to connect to God no matter how small that connection may be. It really seems like you had a bad church which left you burned (pun), and on top of that may be getting that echo chamber of piling on all religion because of some extremist somewhere. There are many people just like that at churches which you can meet; they do the things they do to help first, socialize second. Now, I know many also do those things just to socialize, but the last sentences I wrote can be the same for any kind of group meeting/get together. Church is just helping to facilitate the other thing you want to achieve, getting back in touch with your faith.

kaliyama

OhtheVogonity wrote: »

I see where you're coming from with wanting to meet people, but I urge you not to join up with a church/religion on that basis alone. I think it would ultimately end poorly if you were not being intellectually honest with yourself and just started dabbling in spirituality for the sake of company. Now, I noticed that you said that it's been in your thoughts lately, so I'm not going to assume this is just a move based on social needs, but I think you ought make a decision like this with very clear eyes.

That said, I'm an atheist and don't have a terribly high opinion of most religions. Any Abrahmic religion (Judaism, Christianity, Islam, etc.) will insist that their path is the only true one and all others are false prophets or what have you. In my limited understanding, Buddhism is very accepting and tolerant. But I can't really speak too much to the tendencies of other eastern religions.

Best of luck!

If you like the trappings of western religion with none of the annoying intolerance, I suggest you seek out your nearest Unitarian Universalist congregation.

Kyougu

I should point out I'm not doing this to meet people. Even before I moved I had religion in my thoughts, and I guess just having more time to myself has me evaluate it's place in my life.

A sense of "belonging" would be nice, but it's not the overriding reason why I'm debating doing this.

EDIT:

Huh. There's a UU church like 10 minutes away from me. It seems kinda strange to me, but I think that's just me being used to "formal" church. I think I may check it out this Sunday.

saggio

Mass can be one of the most beautiful things to witness or take part in. Don't be dissuaded from attending if you don't agree with 100% of the theological doctrines of the Church, those things are largely unimportant for most people and shouldn't prevent you from, at the very least, exploring what the Church has to offer. Talk to your local parish priest, and he can most certainly point you in the direction of whatever social groups exist, or recommend you a reading list.

I can't give better advice than that without some more specifics. What is it that is making you want to deal with religion? Are you looking to better yourself? Do you wish to come to terms with something in your past (i.e., figure out what the hell is going on in Mass)? Or are you simply looking for Answers (tm) to metaphysical or epistemological questions?

Hedgethorn

Unlike some other posters in this thread, I won't try to discourage you from attending church. As it stands, a near majority of the people in this country go to church for exactly the reasons you describe: they want something vaguely spiritual in their life and they are interested in getting to know other people in their community. It is a rare church that will turn people away or look down upon them because they are attending for reasons like yours.

I don't know about churches in the Dallas area in particular, but if you are seeking a Christian church that is not very conservative, I'd recommend checking out either an Anglican/Episcopal church or a Methodist church. They tend to be the most liberal Christian denominations. (There can be a great deal of variance among them, so you may need to visit a few before you find just what you're looking for, though.)

KalTorak

I second the suggestion of a Unitarian church. As I understand it, they're less about religion and dogma and all that and more about meeting people and being a community and having discussions. They take people of any religion and of none. It sounds perfect for your situation.

ihmmy

also an agnostic who has on again off again contemplated attending church

hereabouts I usually contemplated going to United churches, because I have been to them while younger (cousins family went regularly and if I ever slept over on a Saturday night, I went to church too). We also have an Anglican church that I know is rather open, but it's also based in the area that all the weirdoes and hippies live in our city

There's no harm in hunting around. See what's fairly close to your place (the further it is, the harder it is to attend) and go once to see how you feel about it. If you don't like it, you can always check out a new church the next week

Hachface

It's already been said several times, but I really can't recommend a Unitarian Universalism highly enough. The modern Unitarian church has pretty much been designed to fill your exact need.

Guffrey

I have gone to church pretty much my whole life, and can't recommend it highly enough. I would plan on visiting at least a handful of churches before you make a choice. Also, have you thought which religion/denomination you would choose? Catholics and Protestants believe in the same basic tenets (Only way to Heaven through Jesus, baptism), but there is a lot of difference in practice (such as how/when to baptize). Then, you obviously have completely different religions. Also, a lot of people seem to believe Unitarians are Christian, which is not true at all. They are a different religion that had its historical routes in Christianity, much like Mormonism.

delphinus

I would suggest a non-denominational church. Most likely very liberal with most views and is mostly about worship, community, encouragement and outreach. Something that should be a bit more familiar, coming from a catholic background.

Regina Fong

Kyougu wrote: »

Okay, self admitted agnostic here.

Grew up as Catholic, though I always found going to church as something I HAD to do, not something I wanted to do. That's probably why as soon as I got old enough to say I didn't want to go, I didn't have to go anymore. Little by little I stopped caring about church and religion, and just became agnostic. None the less part of me still believed in God and actually admired people who had enough faith and will to really believe in God and what not.

Fast Forward to now. I'm in a new city, with no friends, and have lately felt the lonely, wanting to be part of a community. Combined this with my musings about God and I have been debating attending church. Though not catholic church specifically, just any church in general.

My main obstacle is that I don't know if being lonely is the best reason to seek out church. That, and one of my biggest qualms with religion has been how unnacepting it can be to anything and anyone that's not with them. I'm not sure if I could participate in something that says being homosexual is evil, or that they're THE religion, and everyone else is like them. Not all religions are like that though, are they?

So yeah, basically I'm just seeking general advice. Maybe particular church to visits? I'm in the Plano/Dallas area.

I won't do the individual site reading for you, but I googled "plano dallas area welcoming churches" and there are a few promising results, ranging from an Episcopalian church to a Unitarian Universalist one.

In case you were unaware, "welcoming church" is a sort of codeword for a Christian church that does not preach discrimination against gay people (among other things). It doesn't necessarily mean that the church endorses homosexuality or performs gay marriages, and indeed, an individual church which is welcoming may belong to an umbrella faith organization that discriminates against gays, but the individual church in question does not.

I actually have had the distinct pleasure of serving with a Texan from the Dallas area who is a devout Episcopalian, and once told me that when the greater Episcopal organization elected Gene Robinson a bishop he had never been prouder to be an Episcopalian.

Dallas is a very large metropolitan area, and you will find liberal minded people of faith "hanging together" if you look around. And this is probably the only time you'll see me defending anything about Texas. Don't tell Quid.

LewieP's Mummy

I go to a church that grew out of the Vineyard movement from the US. It was the first church I went to where I didn't stand out as being odd - fairly left wing politics, woman used to leadership, vocal in my beliefs (there's a surprise). I felt welcome, and 15 years later, am still there, have been in leadership. led worship, am a trustee. I don't agree with all the views my church has, but I do the most, its where I'm comfortable, and we have donuts (KrispyKreme of course). There's a Vineyard church in Plano - Vineyard Christian Fellowship
1110 E Parker Rd, Plano, TX 75074. I can't vouch for it cos I've never been there, but mostVineyards are fairly similar.

Willeth

Kyougu wrote: »

My main obstacle is that I don't know if being lonely is the best reason to seek out church. That, and one of my biggest qualms with religion has been how unnacepting it can be to anything and anyone that's not with them.

This varies massively. My best friend right now is a devout Christian and I'm firmly... something. Agnostic. Maybe? Doesn't matter.

Actually, that's kind of the point. We've had lengthy discussions about religion, but there's never any pressure behind it or anything. He lives in a house full of Christians and it's one of the most comfortable places for me to be even though I don't believe in God.


I would recommend finding your local Quaker meeting, if there is one. It's a very different and relaxed form of worship with a heavy emphasis on socialising.

Hedgethorn

delphinus wrote: »

I would suggest a non-denominational church. Most likely very liberal with most views and is mostly about worship, community, encouragement and outreach. Something that should be a bit more familiar, coming from a catholic background.

Your mileage will vary greatly when it comes to non-denominational churches. Some have very liberal political views, but a great many are basically Baptist churches that don't wish to be affiliated to one of the many Baptist conferences.