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Strange and Embarrassing Moments - Incest, schadenfreude, and GIANT WASPS FROM HELL

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    InHumanInHuman Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    InHuman wrote: »
    You should be bursting with joy.

    I've had enough of that song after hearing it for 4 hours at a time at work.

    You must have an awesome job.

    I drive F-16's...

    at the electronics section at a canadian superstore.

    InHuman on
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    CristoCristo Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    joshua1 wrote: »
    wait, so you made up 90% of the story?

    Yep.

    Cristo on
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    Rincewind420Rincewind420 Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Cristo wrote: »
    joshua1 wrote: »
    wait, so you made up 90% of the story?

    Yep.

    Well at least you had the common decency to admit it!

    Rincewind420 on
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    DaMoonRulzDaMoonRulz Mare ImbriumRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I recently went through a class to be certified for bag screening for private charters and the instructor had a few good stories. The one that stood out the most, though:

    This was a few years ago on Eastern Airline. They fly DC-9s; the forward cargo bin is heated and pressurized so animals can fly underneath and the aft cargo bin is just pressurized but not heated which is fine for baggage.

    On this one particular flight the ramp crew open up the aft bin and the first thing they see is a kennel with a frozen cat inside. Of course, they're swearing because someone's stupid mistake has just killed a cat, and now they're going to have to deal with the owner and hope not to get sued. Instead of going with a direct approach to deal with the owner, they decide to get a little tricky.

    They page the woman to the counter and tell her that they can't find her checked baggage and they'll have to call the different stations and look throughout the airport to make sure someone didn't take it by accident. While the woman waits at the counter, clearly distraught by her lack of cat, the baggage manager hightails it to the closest pet store to find a cat that looks similar and isn't an icicle.

    Sure enough, he finds a close match and rushes back to the airport, emerging from the backroom and placing the kennel on the counter in front of the woman with an apologetic, "It took some time but we found it."

    The woman takes one look at the cat moving around in the kennel and passes out.

    Turns out the cat had died before she left and she'd decided to transport the body of the cat in the kennel when she flew home to bury it in her back yard.

    DaMoonRulz on
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    cooljammer00cooljammer00 Hey Small Christmas-Man!Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    That sounds like a sitcom plot.

    cooljammer00 on
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    SkeithSkeith Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Did they ever mention what they did with the cats? Like, they didn't toss the corpse, did they?

    Skeith on
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    MovitzMovitz Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    DaMoonRulz wrote: »
    I recently went through a class to be certified for bag screening for private charters and the instructor had a few good stories. The one that stood out the most, though:

    This was a few years ago on Eastern Airline. They fly DC-9s; the forward cargo bin is heated and pressurized so animals can fly underneath and the aft cargo bin is just pressurized but not heated which is fine for baggage.

    On this one particular flight the ramp crew open up the aft bin and the first thing they see is a kennel with a frozen cat inside. Of course, they're swearing because someone's stupid mistake has just killed a cat, and now they're going to have to deal with the owner and hope not to get sued. Instead of going with a direct approach to deal with the owner, they decide to get a little tricky.

    They page the woman to the counter and tell her that they can't find her checked baggage and they'll have to call the different stations and look throughout the airport to make sure someone didn't take it by accident. While the woman waits at the counter, clearly distraught by her lack of cat, the baggage manager hightails it to the closest pet store to find a cat that looks similar and isn't an icicle.

    Sure enough, he finds a close match and rushes back to the airport, emerging from the backroom and placing the kennel on the counter in front of the woman with an apologetic, "It took some time but we found it."

    The woman takes one look at the cat moving around in the kennel and passes out.

    Turns out the cat had died before she left and she'd decided to transport the body of the cat in the kennel when she flew home to bury it in her back yard.

    It's a great story but I've heard it a bunch of times before.

    [EDIT] http://www.snopes.com/horrors/gruesome/deadair.asp

    Movitz on
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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    people who make stuff up in this thread make me a sad pony

    and it's part of why i stopped posting in it

    because really, what's the point then

    (that said that aristocrats joke that got reported for awesome was totally fantastic and acceptable but nobody should try to follow that)

    Pony on
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    WillethWilleth Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Pony wrote: »
    people who make stuff up in this thread make me a sad pony

    and it's part of why i stopped posting in it

    because really, what's the point then

    (that said that aristocrats joke that got reported for awesome was totally fantastic and acceptable but nobody should try to follow that)

    Completely this.

    Willeth on
    @vgreminders - Don't miss out on timed events in gaming!
    @gamefacts - Totally and utterly true gaming facts on the regular!
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    DaMoonRulzDaMoonRulz Mare ImbriumRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    http://www.wpri.com/dpp/mobile/local_wpri_call12_frozen_cat_flown_to_oregon_20090303

    That's the closest I could find with a quick google search. I like the imagery of holding a cat up to a heater to thaw it out.

    DaMoonRulz on
    3basnids3lf9.jpg




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    JustinSane07JustinSane07 Really, stupid? Brockton__BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2009
    I think if we're at the point where people are making up stories and posting urban legends, we should close this one and let it rest for a little while.

    JustinSane07 on
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    SmurphSmurph Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Yeah, I think it's gotten to the point where this isn't a Strange & Embarrassing Moments thread anymore, but more of a general stories thread with people posting shit abut how they are bad ass and don't take shit from anyone. Giving it a rest wouldn't hurt.

    Smurph on
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    DmanDman Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    No making stuff up! There must be something real that is strange and embarrassing you can share. Think hard.

    So I'm currently on antibiotics for strep throat. I was actually really sick almost 3 weeks ago now, but I didn't go to the doctor even after missing some work figuring I just had a really bad cold or flu virus. Of course thinking I just had the same cold that was going around I didn't really worry about making people sick and infected my gf, so just as I'm starting to get better she starts to get really sick.

    She eventually goes to the doctor, gets a swab done and guess what....strep throat.D:

    So she is given antibiotics and I'm still sick so I go to a different doctor and get a swab which comes back positive (duh) so I get also antibiotics. But they are different! I ask the pharmacist what's up and she says I've been prescribed this new penicillin because it works better for strep.

    Cue 3 days later I'm feeling better and my gf is still sick D:

    And my boss who is about to go on vacation is pissed because he just started getting the symptoms of sore throat (2-5 day incubation period remember!), and he knows exactly who he got it from :?

    Dman on
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    FalxFalx Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Dman wrote: »
    No making stuff up! There must be something real that is strange and embarrassing you can share. Think hard.

    So I'm currently on antibiotics for strep throat. I was actually really sick almost 3 weeks ago now, but I didn't go to the doctor even after missing some work figuring I just had a really bad cold or flu virus. Of course thinking I just had the same cold that was going around I didn't really worry about making people sick and infected my gf, so just as I'm starting to get better she starts to get really sick.

    She eventually goes to the doctor, gets a swab done and guess what....strep throat.D:

    So she is given antibiotics and I'm still sick so I go to a different doctor and get a swab which comes back positive (duh) so I get also antibiotics. But they are different! I ask the pharmacist what's up and she says I've been prescribed this new penicillin because it works better for strep.

    Cue 3 days later I'm feeling better and my gf is still sick D:

    And my boss who is about to go on vacation is pissed because he just started getting the symptoms of sore throat (2-5 day incubation period remember!), and he knows exactly who he got it from :?

    That'll teach you to make out with your boss while you're sick.

    Falx on
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    SkutSkutSkutSkut Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Dman, are you like, some form of viral incubator? Because it sounds like it.

    SkutSkut on
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    OptimusZedOptimusZed Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Dman wrote: »
    I'm patient zero.

    OptimusZed on
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    PeregrineFalconPeregrineFalcon Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I submit that while Pony's experiences are pretty fucked up (eating a tub of lard, bashing a china cabinet, and doing unholy things to some girl's stuffed animal most likely) at least he's not playing Soggy Biscuit or whatever the fuck you people are doing. o_O

    PeregrineFalcon on
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    truck-a-saurastruck-a-sauras Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I submit that while Pony's experiences are pretty fucked up (eating a tub of lard, bashing a china cabinet, and doing unholy things to some girl's stuffed animal most likely) at least he's not playing Soggy Biscuit or whatever the fuck you people are doing. o_O

    assuming you were ever sick enough to play that game........... if you lost, who in the hell would ever eat the damn thing???????????? that part escapes me, could anyone ever be dumb enough to be peer pressured into something as disgusting as that? I don't get you people and your games.

    when my crew would get bored or drunk stupid and bored we'd just go our roller blading and laugh at each other falling and shit. Or better yet we'd take our drunk selves and go out in search of women. weirdos

    truck-a-sauras on
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    WulfWulf Disciple of Tzeentch The Void... (New Jersey)Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Pony wrote: »
    people who make stuff up in this thread make me a sad pony

    and it's part of why i stopped posting in it

    because really, what's the point then

    (that said that aristocrats joke that got reported for awesome was totally fantastic and acceptable but nobody should try to follow that)

    Yeah, seriously people, we have enough fucked up stuff happening to us for real, lets not turn this into the Scary shit thread that always turns into people posting stupid fucking dreams. D:

    Wulf on
    Everyone needs a little Chaos!
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    tbwb24tbwb24 Registered User new member
    edited June 2009
    I met this girl over the internet in high school, she lived across town. We hung out a few times, fooled around a little and had a good time.

    I was at her place one night and we ended up fooling around without any clothes on. Well, we hear the garage door start to open and start throwing clothes on. Her mom gets in, we managed to both get dressed in that time and tried to look as innocent as possible. I take off a few minutes later, get home and take off my shoes only to realize I'm wearing bellbottom jeans. Her bellbottom jeans. In our rush to get dressed I threw her pants on and she mine and I wore them around the rest of the night before I got home.

    tbwb24 on
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    mystikspyralmystikspyral Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    OK, I've got a good one.

    This last Monday my doctor called me at work and told me I have thyroid cancer. As you can imagine I went into distress mode. I left work immediately. My boyfriend took me back to our place and we laid down and he cuddled me as I wept and flipped the fuck out.

    We hadn’t had sex in almost two weeks at that point for various reasons. Two weeks is a damn long time to go without sex and we were both easily excitable by even innocent physical contact.

    When I finally got a bit more sane I sniffled and sat up on my side a little so we could watch some MacGuyver. As I sat up I felt something… hard.

    My boyfriend was sporting a raging boner while I wept about cancer. o_O...:lol::lol::lol:

    It was one of the first things that really cheered me up and made me laugh. I teased him mercilessly though.

    mystikspyral on
    "When life gives you lemons, just say 'Fuck the lemons,' and bail" :rotate:
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    firewaterwordfirewaterword Satchitananda Pais Vasco to San FranciscoRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Wulf wrote: »
    Yeah, seriously people, we have enough fucked up stuff happening to us for real, lets not turn this into the Scary shit thread that always turns into people posting stupid fucking dreams. D:

    How about we talk about shadow people for 15 or so pages? :P

    firewaterword on
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    jhunter46jhunter46 Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I was 18, freshly moved out of my house and renting a house with a group of friends and my now wife then girlfriend.

    Well New Years Eve rolls around and obviously we need to throw a party. Downside is I'm a Manager/Driver at Pizza Hut and there is no way I'm not working that night. I end up delivering Pizza until 11 and get home somewhere around 11:30. Everyone is already pretty drunk at that point so I do the responsible thing and decide to catch up.

    Four or five beers and nearly ten shots later I'm pretty drunk, so again being the mature responsible adult I am, I decide to keep drinking.

    Fast forward to the next morning. I wake up in bed and realize three things.

    One, I don't have any clothes on.

    Two, the room smells like vomit.

    Three, I don't remember what caused one or two.

    When my wife got up, she filled me in on the details. We went to bed around 3 and decided to have drunk sex. Afterward I rolled out of bed, hit my face on the floor giving me a bloody nose and vomited all over myself and the floor. The wife then stripped me down, cleaned me up and got me back into bed.

    I don't care what I say about her, she's alright.

    jhunter46 on
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    YamiNoSenshiYamiNoSenshi A point called Z In the complex planeRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Rest in peace, S&EM thread. You were a good companion, but I agree we should let it lie for a bit. Let people have some more strange and embarrassing things happen to them so we have good material or when it comes back.

    YamiNoSenshi on
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    firewaterwordfirewaterword Satchitananda Pais Vasco to San FranciscoRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I liked the work thread that lived and died in G&T way back when. Employee lounge or something. Someone with an interesting job do that here for our entertainment.

    firewaterword on
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    DHS OdiumDHS Odium Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    So are we really letting this thread die? Congratulations fake story posting people, you killed the thread. Happy?

    DHS Odium on
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    YamiNoSenshiYamiNoSenshi A point called Z In the complex planeRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    DHS Odium wrote: »
    So are we really letting this thread die? Congratulations fake story posting people, you killed the thread. Happy?

    It's not dying, it's resting. All D&D threads get locked when they hit 100 pages, so it's probably a good idea to let it lie for a little bit since we as a forum seem to be running out of decent material. It will return, as the phoenix rises from the ashes of its parent. But with more poop stories.

    Hehe. Poop.

    YamiNoSenshi on
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    fshavlakfshavlak Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Without S&E what will I read? Maybe this is time to revive the horrible things you've done thread and try to keep it a little less celebratory than it became last time it got locked. That thread had plenty of gold in it also.

    fshavlak on
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    YamiNoSenshiYamiNoSenshi A point called Z In the complex planeRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    How about another Idiots With Cars thread? That went well last time.

    YamiNoSenshi on
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    SkutSkutSkutSkut Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    What about the disturbing/terrifying stories thread? I liked that one.

    SkutSkut on
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    JAmp5JAmp5 Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    SkutSkut wrote: »
    What about the disturbing/terrifying stories thread? I liked that one.

    +1 I need a replacement for my S&E addiction

    JAmp5 on
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    WillethWilleth Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I liked the work thread that lived and died in G&T way back when. Employee lounge or something. Someone with an interesting job do that here for our entertainment.

    Didn't the Employee Lounge get shut down by the staff because they weren't comfortable with people talking shit about their employers on the boards?

    Willeth on
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    KronusKronus Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    JAmp5 wrote: »
    SkutSkut wrote: »
    What about the disturbing/terrifying stories thread? I liked that one.

    +1 I need a replacement for my S&E addiction

    Many S&E Stories have doubled as disturbing/terrifying stories for me already D:

    Kronus on
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    PeregrineFalconPeregrineFalcon Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    SkutSkut wrote: »
    What about the disturbing/terrifying stories thread? I liked that one.

    The "Disturbing/Terrifying" one seemed to turn into the usual copypasta memes about girls dressed like clowns coming to kill you if you didn't post this on six videos.

    If you mean the "Horrible things you've done" that got shut down after people started admitting to serious felony offences in-thread.

    PeregrineFalcon on
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    YamiNoSenshiYamiNoSenshi A point called Z In the complex planeRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Kronus wrote: »
    JAmp5 wrote: »
    SkutSkut wrote: »
    What about the disturbing/terrifying stories thread? I liked that one.

    +1 I need a replacement for my S&E addiction

    Many S&E Stories have doubled as disturbing/terrifying stories for me already D:

    Whatever
    2w4a2ok.jpg

    are you
    281404571_bbf5d63715.jpg

    talking
    bee_trap.jpg

    about?
    halloween%20bee.JPG

    YamiNoSenshi on
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    SkutSkutSkutSkut Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    SkutSkut wrote: »
    What about the disturbing/terrifying stories thread? I liked that one.

    The "Disturbing/Terrifying" one seemed to turn into the usual copypasta memes about girls dressed like clowns coming to kill you if you didn't post this on six videos.

    If you mean the "Horrible things you've done" that got shut down after people started admitting to serious felony offences in-thread.

    I mean the one about the Shack, and that one guy that found that abandoned shack in the woods with all the skeletons in it, that thread. :P

    SkutSkut on
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    JustinSane07JustinSane07 Really, stupid? Brockton__BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2009
    OK, I've got a good one.

    This last Monday my doctor called me at work and told me I have thyroid cancer. As you can imagine I went into distress mode. I left work immediately. My boyfriend took me back to our place and we laid down and he cuddled me as I wept and flipped the fuck out.

    We hadn’t had sex in almost two weeks at that point for various reasons. Two weeks is a damn long time to go without sex and we were both easily excitable by even innocent physical contact.

    When I finally got a bit more sane I sniffled and sat up on my side a little so we could watch some MacGuyver. As I sat up I felt something… hard.

    My boyfriend was sporting a raging boner while I wept about cancer. o_O...:lol::lol::lol:

    It was one of the first things that really cheered me up and made me laugh. I teased him mercilessly though.

    This story fits perfectly with today's comic, somehow. Just something of a completely different subject, and whups, there's a boner!

    JustinSane07 on
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    fshavlakfshavlak Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Why not just have an interesting story thread?

    Maybe it'd be too boring.

    I'm all for another try at the horrible things thread, there were some real gems in the last one. Maybe the OP can say "don't admit to felonies" or somesuch.

    fshavlak on
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    mystikspyralmystikspyral Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    OK, I've got a good one.

    This last Monday my doctor called me at work and told me I have thyroid cancer. As you can imagine I went into distress mode. I left work immediately. My boyfriend took me back to our place and we laid down and he cuddled me as I wept and flipped the fuck out.

    We hadn’t had sex in almost two weeks at that point for various reasons. Two weeks is a damn long time to go without sex and we were both easily excitable by even innocent physical contact.

    When I finally got a bit more sane I sniffled and sat up on my side a little so we could watch some MacGuyver. As I sat up I felt something… hard.

    My boyfriend was sporting a raging boner while I wept about cancer. o_O...:lol::lol::lol:

    It was one of the first things that really cheered me up and made me laugh. I teased him mercilessly though.

    This story fits perfectly with today's comic, somehow. Just something of a completely different subject, and whups, there's a boner!

    I just want to clarify (since there is a mixture of fake stories and paranoia going around) that this did happen this week. When it happened one of the first things I said to my boyfriend was “I’m posting this on strange and embarrassing”8-)

    mystikspyral on
    "When life gives you lemons, just say 'Fuck the lemons,' and bail" :rotate:
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    Moe FwackyMoe Fwacky Right Here, Right Now Drives a BuickModerator mod
    edited June 2009
    Willeth wrote: »
    I liked the work thread that lived and died in G&T way back when. Employee lounge or something. Someone with an interesting job do that here for our entertainment.

    Didn't the Employee Lounge get shut down by the staff because they weren't comfortable with people talking shit about their employers on the boards?

    I'm pretty sure it got shut down because it turned into a chat thread, like this is doing right now, fortunately it's at 100 pages and due for a lock anyway.

    Moe Fwacky on
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This discussion has been closed.