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It's not what people say but how they say it that bothers me. Something that doesn't translate too well into text based interactions. More often than not the people I see who use 'no offense' use it as some sort of social shield when they are offering criticism that isn't constructive.
You know, communication is a two way process. Have you considered that you're misinterpreting their intent? This seems much more likely to me considering how easily you seem to get offended.
You guys have it completely backwards. The only reason people feel a need to add "No offense," to a comment is precisely because there are so many people out there that get bent out of shape should anyone dare to offer their unsolicited opinion.
"No offense, but you probably shouldn't be giving your two year old a shot of bourbon."
"DON'T TELL ME HOW TO RAISE MY CHILD YOU PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE PIECE OF SHIT."
See, "no offence" is rendered utterly meaningless in that context too: since you're telling them that you shouldn't be doing X because it's stupid/dangerous/damaging it carries all the connotations of pointing out their ignorance anyway
Also Dru it's constantly used in a fashion a lot less clear cut and defensible than that
No offence, but you're not getting where I'm coming from
...see, people use it all the goddamn time as if it's a get-out-from-further-commentary-clause and it is annoying as hell
The point is, if you are giving constructive criticism, you shouldn't have to say "No offense" and if you are just saying something to offend them, then it's just a tool so you feel better about it.
The point is, if you are giving constructive criticism, you shouldn't have to say "No offense" and if you are just saying something to offend them, then it's just a tool so you feel better about it.
alternatively, humans are inherently unpredictable and it's merely an attempt to diffuse what could escalate into an aggressive situation
Druhim on
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HunterChemist with a heart of AuRegistered Userregular
edited May 2009
No offense, but I want to fuck your GF in the ass.
Everyone should read "The Language Instinct" by Steven Pinker. It is a surprisingly good read, even if at times it is pretty difficult to digest what he is saying.
Actually, all his books are pretty good.
Swill on
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HunterChemist with a heart of AuRegistered Userregular
The point is, if you are giving constructive criticism, you shouldn't have to say "No offense" and if you are just saying something to offend them, then it's just a tool so you feel better about it.
alternatively, humans are inherently unpredictable and it's merely an attempt to diffuse what could escalate into an aggressive situation
Also, nobody takes constructive criticism well. Some people are just better at hiding their rage.
The point is, if you are giving constructive criticism, you shouldn't have to say "No offense" and if you are just saying something to offend them, then it's just a tool so you feel better about it.
alternatively, humans are inherently unpredictable and it's merely an attempt to diffuse what could escalate into an aggressive situation
The point is, if you are giving constructive criticism, you shouldn't have to say "No offense" and if you are just saying something to offend them, then it's just a tool so you feel better about it.
alternatively, humans are inherently unpredictable and it's merely an attempt to diffuse what could escalate into an aggressive situation
I believe that too, but I seem to be in a minority. I think it is because people have a negative connotation of unpredictable, so it isn't really compatible with humanism. Or religion.
Sorry about the tangent, it just really caught my eye.
The point is, if you are giving constructive criticism, you shouldn't have to say "No offense" and if you are just saying something to offend them, then it's just a tool so you feel better about it.
alternatively, humans are inherently unpredictable and it's merely an attempt to diffuse what could escalate into an aggressive situation
Also, nobody takes constructive criticism well. Some people are just better at hiding their rage.
Warsh, warshington. THERE IS NO GODDAMN R. STOP IT.
Fake swearing. I hang out with a bunch of mormons (being one myself) and they say things like fudge and frick. Also, in lue of flipping me off, they will put there three middle fingers and tell me to "read between the lines." HOW IS THAT ANY FUCKING DIFFERENT FROM JUST FLIPPING ME OFF?! IT'S A HAND SIGNAL THAT MEANS "FUCK YOU." IT DOESN'T MAKE BABY JESUS CRY ANY LESS WITH THREE FINGERS! JUST FUCKING SWEAR OR DON'T!
Ugh.
uh, the warshington thing is just a regional accent
no one's actually spelling it Warshington
But there is no R in the word. I can understand regional pronunciations, those are fine. But they are adding a letter.
oh get over it
no one's adding a letter like I said
it's just regional pronunciation
Yes. And it's wrong.
As a third generation Washingtonian, I beg to differ.
Evander on
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HunterChemist with a heart of AuRegistered Userregular
Warsh, warshington. THERE IS NO GODDAMN R. STOP IT.
Fake swearing. I hang out with a bunch of mormons (being one myself) and they say things like fudge and frick. Also, in lue of flipping me off, they will put there three middle fingers and tell me to "read between the lines." HOW IS THAT ANY FUCKING DIFFERENT FROM JUST FLIPPING ME OFF?! IT'S A HAND SIGNAL THAT MEANS "FUCK YOU." IT DOESN'T MAKE BABY JESUS CRY ANY LESS WITH THREE FINGERS! JUST FUCKING SWEAR OR DON'T!
Ugh.
uh, the warshington thing is just a regional accent
no one's actually spelling it Warshington
But there is no R in the word. I can understand regional pronunciations, those are fine. But they are adding a letter.
oh get over it
no one's adding a letter like I said
it's just regional pronunciation
Yes. And it's wrong.
As a third generation Washingtonian, I beg to differ.
You know, communication is a two way process. Have you considered that you're misinterpreting their intent? This seems much more likely to me considering how easily you seem to get offended.
While there probably is truth to that statement, I was expressing my frustrations with the phrase in general as it seemed to be the idea of this thread.
Warsh, warshington. THERE IS NO GODDAMN R. STOP IT.
Fake swearing. I hang out with a bunch of mormons (being one myself) and they say things like fudge and frick. Also, in lue of flipping me off, they will put there three middle fingers and tell me to "read between the lines." HOW IS THAT ANY FUCKING DIFFERENT FROM JUST FLIPPING ME OFF?! IT'S A HAND SIGNAL THAT MEANS "FUCK YOU." IT DOESN'T MAKE BABY JESUS CRY ANY LESS WITH THREE FINGERS! JUST FUCKING SWEAR OR DON'T!
Ugh.
uh, the warshington thing is just a regional accent
no one's actually spelling it Warshington
But there is no R in the word. I can understand regional pronunciations, those are fine. But they are adding a letter.
oh get over it
no one's adding a letter like I said
it's just regional pronunciation
Yes. And it's wrong.
As a third generation Washingtonian, I beg to differ.
You mean DCtonian?
I still remember the time Weaver called me because he was confuse about what city the Redskins are based out of.
"I mean, the Hawks are based in Seattle. Are the Redskins based in Spokane?"
You know, communication is a two way process. Have you considered that you're misinterpreting their intent? This seems much more likely to me considering how easily you seem to get offended.
While there probably is truth to that statement, I was expressing my frustrations with the phrase in general as it seemed to be the idea of this thread.
EDIT: I take too long to respond.
I understand, I feel the same way about "Excuse me"
It's supposed to be a polite phrase of apology, but the venom it carries when spoken by some people has just about ruined it for me.
Usagi on
0
HunterChemist with a heart of AuRegistered Userregular
Warsh, warshington. THERE IS NO GODDAMN R. STOP IT.
Fake swearing. I hang out with a bunch of mormons (being one myself) and they say things like fudge and frick. Also, in lue of flipping me off, they will put there three middle fingers and tell me to "read between the lines." HOW IS THAT ANY FUCKING DIFFERENT FROM JUST FLIPPING ME OFF?! IT'S A HAND SIGNAL THAT MEANS "FUCK YOU." IT DOESN'T MAKE BABY JESUS CRY ANY LESS WITH THREE FINGERS! JUST FUCKING SWEAR OR DON'T!
Ugh.
uh, the warshington thing is just a regional accent
no one's actually spelling it Warshington
But there is no R in the word. I can understand regional pronunciations, those are fine. But they are adding a letter.
oh get over it
no one's adding a letter like I said
it's just regional pronunciation
Yes. And it's wrong.
As a third generation Washingtonian, I beg to differ.
You mean DCtonian?
I still remember the time Weaver called me because he was confuse about what city the Redskins are based out of.
"I mean, the Hawks are based in Seattle. Are the Redskins based in Spokane?"
I AM NOT EXAGGERATING AT ALL
You should have told him Washington has a professional football team, so the Redskins can't be from there.
Warsh, warshington. THERE IS NO GODDAMN R. STOP IT.
Fake swearing. I hang out with a bunch of mormons (being one myself) and they say things like fudge and frick. Also, in lue of flipping me off, they will put there three middle fingers and tell me to "read between the lines." HOW IS THAT ANY FUCKING DIFFERENT FROM JUST FLIPPING ME OFF?! IT'S A HAND SIGNAL THAT MEANS "FUCK YOU." IT DOESN'T MAKE BABY JESUS CRY ANY LESS WITH THREE FINGERS! JUST FUCKING SWEAR OR DON'T!
Ugh.
uh, the warshington thing is just a regional accent
no one's actually spelling it Warshington
But there is no R in the word. I can understand regional pronunciations, those are fine. But they are adding a letter.
oh get over it
no one's adding a letter like I said
it's just regional pronunciation
Yes. And it's wrong.
As a third generation Washingtonian, I beg to differ.
You mean DCtonian?
I still remember the time Weaver called me because he was confuse about what city the Redskins are based out of.
"I mean, the Hawks are based in Seattle. Are the Redskins based in Spokane?"
I AM NOT EXAGGERATING AT ALL
We had the name first, man.
I don't mind sharing it. I'll just pronounce it with an extra r so we can tell the diffence.
Warsh, warshington. THERE IS NO GODDAMN R. STOP IT.
Fake swearing. I hang out with a bunch of mormons (being one myself) and they say things like fudge and frick. Also, in lue of flipping me off, they will put there three middle fingers and tell me to "read between the lines." HOW IS THAT ANY FUCKING DIFFERENT FROM JUST FLIPPING ME OFF?! IT'S A HAND SIGNAL THAT MEANS "FUCK YOU." IT DOESN'T MAKE BABY JESUS CRY ANY LESS WITH THREE FINGERS! JUST FUCKING SWEAR OR DON'T!
Ugh.
uh, the warshington thing is just a regional accent
no one's actually spelling it Warshington
But there is no R in the word. I can understand regional pronunciations, those are fine. But they are adding a letter.
oh get over it
no one's adding a letter like I said
it's just regional pronunciation
Yes. And it's wrong.
As a third generation Washingtonian, I beg to differ.
You mean DCtonian?
I still remember the time Weaver called me because he was confuse about what city the Redskins are based out of.
"I mean, the Hawks are based in Seattle. Are the Redskins based in Spokane?"
I AM NOT EXAGGERATING AT ALL
You should have told him Washington has a professional football team, so the Redskins can't be from there.
Yeah, that's pretty much what I said. And he was all, "well then what city are they based out of?"
...
"Really Weaver? You don't know of any other Washington?"
Posts
See, "no offence" is rendered utterly meaningless in that context too: since you're telling them that you shouldn't be doing X because it's stupid/dangerous/damaging it carries all the connotations of pointing out their ignorance anyway
Also Dru it's constantly used in a fashion a lot less clear cut and defensible than that
No offence, but you're not getting where I'm coming from
...see, people use it all the goddamn time as if it's a get-out-from-further-commentary-clause and it is annoying as hell
Sometimes you plainly gotta state that something sucks.
You are probably used to that.
I remember my friend telling me "no offence, but you smell like butt" and laughing my ass off because I was drunk at the time
Simple minds, simple pleasures
teefs
Secret Satan 2013 Wishlist
No offence, but you're a bright guy that gets exactly how the term is abused
Also, someone tell me what the fuck Actaully means
Actually, all his books are pretty good.
Also, nobody takes constructive criticism well. Some people are just better at hiding their rage.
Secret Satan 2013 Wishlist
alternatively, bitches be crazy, yo
water?
oh, you mean wuder
Seriously, though, what is up with "innit"? I here that in basically every BBC show, and it is just strange.
I believe that too, but I seem to be in a minority. I think it is because people have a negative connotation of unpredictable, so it isn't really compatible with humanism. Or religion.
Sorry about the tangent, it just really caught my eye.
I lol'd
well yeah
As a third generation Washingtonian, I beg to differ.
If we did it as the Mets we would start out well in the beginning but then choke about 1/5 of the way into the action.
Secret Satan 2013 Wishlist
Then you are third generation wrong.
Secret Satan 2013 Wishlist
While there probably is truth to that statement, I was expressing my frustrations with the phrase in general as it seemed to be the idea of this thread.
EDIT: I take too long to respond.
I still remember the time Weaver called me because he was confuse about what city the Redskins are based out of.
"I mean, the Hawks are based in Seattle. Are the Redskins based in Spokane?"
I AM NOT EXAGGERATING AT ALL
I understand, I feel the same way about "Excuse me"
It's supposed to be a polite phrase of apology, but the venom it carries when spoken by some people has just about ruined it for me.
You should have told him Washington has a professional football team, so the Redskins can't be from there.
Secret Satan 2013 Wishlist
buy a guy a drink first, won't ya?
We had the name first, man.
I don't mind sharing it. I'll just pronounce it with an extra r so we can tell the diffence.
ALL PROBLEMS SOLVED
not to be racist
...
"Really Weaver? You don't know of any other Washington?"
yeah this is basically the top of the charts