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THIS IS SPARTAAAAA!!! (Official "300" Thread)

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    ferrets54ferrets54 Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Its impossible to know, of course. Most of the best lines in the movies are direct quotes from Herodotus, which is a fine book to read if you have an interest in the subject. But whether or not they gave any particular outcome to the war is irrelevent (though I would argue they did). The point is that these 300 did something over two thousand years ago that no group of men has managed to better since, and their names are seared into human identity. Real life Achilleuses.

    ferrets54 on
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    Der Waffle MousDer Waffle Mous Blame this on the misfortune of your birth. New Yark, New Yark.Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Apparently I know like three or four of the guys who played the Immortals as extras.


    crazy

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    ferrets54ferrets54 Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Ask them how uncomfortably homoerotic it was to be playing a Spartan extra.

    ferrets54 on
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    The Dude With HerpesThe Dude With Herpes Lehi, UTRegistered User regular
    edited March 2007
    ferrets54 wrote: »
    Ask them how uncomfortably homoerotic it was to be playing a Spartan extra and not being able to act on your impulses.

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    GreenGreen Stick around. I'm full of bad ideas.Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    ferrets54 wrote: »
    Ask them how uncomfortably homoerotic it was to be playing a Spartan extra.

    Immortal extras, not Spartan extras

    Green on
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    ferrets54ferrets54 Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Green wrote: »
    ferrets54 wrote: »
    Ask them how uncomfortably homoerotic it was to be playing a Spartan extra.

    Immortal extras, not Spartan extras


    Oh right of course. That meant they couldn't hang out.

    Pssss! They weren't fighting in real life, dude!

    ferrets54 on
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    LurkerLurker Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Delicacies of dismemberment aside, 300 is notable for its outrageous sexual confusion. Here stands the Spartan king Leonidas (Gerard Butler) and his 299 buddies in nothing but leather man-panties and oiled torsos, clutching a variety of phalluses they seek to thrust in the bodies of their foes by trapping them in a small, rectum-like mountain passage called the "gates of hell(o!)" Yonder rises the Persian menace, led by the slinky, mascara'd Xerxes. When he's not flaring his nostrils at Leonidas and demanding he kneel down before his, uh, majesty, this flamboyantly pierced crypto-transsexual lounges on chinchilla throw pillows amidst a rump-shaking orgy of disfigured lesbians.

    On first glance, the terms couldn't be clearer: macho white guys vs. effeminate Orientals. Yet aside from the fact that Spartans come across as pinched, pinheaded gym bunnies, it's their flesh the movie worships. Not since Beau Travail has a phalanx of meatheads received such insistent ogling. As for the threat to peace, freedom, and democracy, that filthy Persian orgy looks way more fun than sitting around watching Spartans mope while their angry children slap each other around. At once homophobic and homoerotic, 300 is finally, and hilariously, just hysterical.

    -Nathan Lee The Village Voice

    So I took the afternoon off and went to see 300. Somehow seeing a deeply homophobic film—the Persians are portrayed as some sort of gaysian menace, a pride parade with suicide bombers, a threat to all things decent and, er, Greek—took my mind off Garrison Keillor’s deeply homophobic column today at Salon. Don’t get me wrong: I enjoyed 300 in part because the Persian Emperor is played by an eight foot tall Blek drag queen. Emperor RuPaul.

    I mean, my God, the lengths the filmmakers went to in order to reassure the straight boys in the audience that there was nothing homoerotic about staring at men in thongs for three hours.

    The King of the Spartans—among the most notorious boy fuckers in ancient history—dismisses Athenians as weak-willed “philosophers and boy lovers”? Hilarious. And Xerxes, the Persian Emperor, is so gay—how gay is he? mascara! nose rings! eye liner! leather!—yet he fills his tent with… lesbians? He he he. The King of the Spartans telling his three-hundred soldiers—recruited from and outfited by International Male—that Sparta is “the world’s one hope for reason and justice.” Bah! That would be the same Sparta that owned slaves and made running off into the woods and murdering a slave a right of passage for young boys—basically, the Spartan Bar Mitzvah. Holy crap! The endless sex scene between the Spartan King and his wife? Not funny, just pornographic. I went to the bathroom.

    300 reminded me of Troy, another recent Hollywood film set in and around ancient Greece. When we first see Brad Pitt as Achilles he’s shown in bed, naked, with two nude and completely spent females draped over him. “See?” the filmmakers were screaming. “He’s an ancient Greek soldier and he wears a skirt and he’s oiled up like a porn star—but he fucks girls! Two at a time!”

    300’s homophobia is so over the top it ultimately functions as a satire—see? I get satire sometimes!—of its presumed audiences’ homophobia. So is it a homophobic movie? That’s debatable, I guess.

    What isn’t up for debate is the film’s politics. There are times when the Persian army looks unmistakably like a crowd of chanting Islamic radicals. And if the Spartan King has to break the law to defend Spartan freedom? Well, sometime a King’s gotta do what a King’s gotta do. Because, as the Queen of Sparta points out, freedom isn’t free. And, yes, she uses exactly those words.

    - Dan Savage

    Also, a review from Ruthless Reviews


    :D

    Lurker on
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    AHH!AHH! Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    I knew I felt different after watching the movie.

    AHH! on
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    ZephosZephos Climbin in yo ski lifts, snatchin your people up. MichiganRegistered User regular
    edited March 2007
    i installed RoN today and had some fun.

    whereisthis.jpg

    Zephos on
    Xbox One/360: Penguin McCool
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    BearcatBearcat Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    There's 300 of them right?

    Bearcat on
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    AHH!AHH! Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    lemme check

    AHH! on
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    ZephosZephos Climbin in yo ski lifts, snatchin your people up. MichiganRegistered User regular
    edited March 2007
    yeah, 100/100 pop limit, but each unit comes with 3 soldiers.

    Zephos on
    Xbox One/360: Penguin McCool
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    AHH!AHH! Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Man. Get some Abrams in there and they'll be fucked to shit.

    It'd but fun to watch

    AHH! on
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    Bloods EndBloods End Blade of Tyshalle Punch dimensionRegistered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Lurker wrote: »
    Delicacies of dismemberment aside, 300 is notable for its outrageous sexual confusion. Here stands the Spartan king Leonidas (Gerard Butler) and his 299 buddies in nothing but leather man-panties and oiled torsos, clutching a variety of phalluses they seek to thrust in the bodies of their foes by trapping them in a small, rectum-like mountain passage called the "gates of hell(o!)" Yonder rises the Persian menace, led by the slinky, mascara'd Xerxes. When he's not flaring his nostrils at Leonidas and demanding he kneel down before his, uh, majesty, this flamboyantly pierced crypto-transsexual lounges on chinchilla throw pillows amidst a rump-shaking orgy of disfigured lesbians.

    On first glance, the terms couldn't be clearer: macho white guys vs. effeminate Orientals. Yet aside from the fact that Spartans come across as pinched, pinheaded gym bunnies, it's their flesh the movie worships. Not since Beau Travail has a phalanx of meatheads received such insistent ogling. As for the threat to peace, freedom, and democracy, that filthy Persian orgy looks way more fun than sitting around watching Spartans mope while their angry children slap each other around. At once homophobic and homoerotic, 300 is finally, and hilariously, just hysterical.
    -Nathan Lee The Village Voice

    So I took the afternoon off and went to see 300. Somehow seeing a deeply homophobic film—the Persians are portrayed as some sort of gaysian menace, a pride parade with suicide bombers, a threat to all things decent and, er, Greek—took my mind off Garrison Keillor’s deeply homophobic column today at Salon. Don’t get me wrong: I enjoyed 300 in part because the Persian Emperor is played by an eight foot tall Blek drag queen. Emperor RuPaul.

    I mean, my God, the lengths the filmmakers went to in order to reassure the straight boys in the audience that there was nothing homoerotic about staring at men in thongs for three hours.

    The King of the Spartans—among the most notorious boy fuckers in ancient history—dismisses Athenians as weak-willed “philosophers and boy lovers”? Hilarious. And Xerxes, the Persian Emperor, is so gay—how gay is he? mascara! nose rings! eye liner! leather!—yet he fills his tent with… lesbians? He he he. The King of the Spartans telling his three-hundred soldiers—recruited from and outfited by International Male—that Sparta is “the world’s one hope for reason and justice.” Bah! That would be the same Sparta that owned slaves and made running off into the woods and murdering a slave a right of passage for young boys—basically, the Spartan Bar Mitzvah. Holy crap! The endless sex scene between the Spartan King and his wife? Not funny, just pornographic. I went to the bathroom.

    300 reminded me of Troy, another recent Hollywood film set in and around ancient Greece. When we first see Brad Pitt as Achilles he’s shown in bed, naked, with two nude and completely spent females draped over him. “See?” the filmmakers were screaming. “He’s an ancient Greek soldier and he wears a skirt and he’s oiled up like a porn star—but he fucks girls! Two at a time!”

    300’s homophobia is so over the top it ultimately functions as a satire—see? I get satire sometimes!—of its presumed audiences’ homophobia. So is it a homophobic movie? That’s debatable, I guess.

    What isn’t up for debate is the film’s politics. There are times when the Persian army looks unmistakably like a crowd of chanting Islamic radicals. And if the Spartan King has to break the law to defend Spartan freedom? Well, sometime a King’s gotta do what a King’s gotta do. Because, as the Queen of Sparta points out, freedom isn’t free. And, yes, she uses exactly those words.
    - Dan Savage

    Also, a review from Ruthless Reviews


    :D

    People complaining about how the Persians were presented in this in this is as silly as complaining about how the foot didn't actually represent New York Ninja groups in the new TMNT

    Bloods End on
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    LurkerLurker Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Also, Frank Miller is apparently very pro war in Iraq.

    Lurker on
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    ferrets54ferrets54 Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Iraqis are Arabs, Iranians are Persians. Get it confused and both of them will have one more reason to kill us.

    ferrets54 on
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    Penguin IncarnatePenguin Incarnate King of Kafiristan Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Dr. Gonzo wrote: »
    the spartans weren't really responsible for greek victory. the fact that they held off the persians helped, but there were a lot bigger factors that led to greek victory
    ...Thanks.

    Penguin Incarnate on
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    trentsteeltrentsteel Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Actually, I thought it was kind of cool that, after Leonidas knew he was being flanked (according to some websites anyway) he asked everyone there if they wanted to go home and that they wouldn't be punished for doing so. Something like 400 of the dudes that were forced to stay there up to that point, stayed to fight and die anyway while the rest of them left.

    trentsteel on
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    ZzuluZzulu Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    This airs on theaters the 4th of April over here.

    I have waited so long for this

    Zzulu on
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    Bob The MonkeyBob The Monkey Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    ferrets54 wrote: »
    Its impossible to know, of course. Most of the best lines in the movies are direct quotes from Herodotus, which is a fine book to read if you have an interest in the subject. But whether or not they gave any particular outcome to the war is irrelevent (though I would argue they did). The point is that these 300 did something over two thousand years ago that no group of men has managed to better since, and their names are seared into human identity. Real life Achilleuses.

    Did you see the recent programme on the BBC, "The Greatest Raid of All"? A World War II commando raid that, for some reason, has been all but forgotten. And oh my fucking God it was unbelievable.

    There might not be Spartans around these days but, my God, there are people who are close.

    Bob The Monkey on
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    scarlet st.scarlet st. Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Lurker wrote: »
    Also, Frank Miller is apparently very pro war in Iraq.

    I heard things about a comic concerning Batman fighting Al-Qaeda.

    Frank Miller is insane, but I love him. I think Rorschach's views on American liberals is essentially comparable to Frank Miller.

    scarlet st. on
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    dushdush Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    ferrets54 wrote: »
    Its impossible to know, of course. Most of the best lines in the movies are direct quotes from Herodotus, which is a fine book to read if you have an interest in the subject. But whether or not they gave any particular outcome to the war is irrelevent (though I would argue they did). The point is that these 300 did something over two thousand years ago that no group of men has managed to better since, and their names are seared into human identity. Real life Achilleuses.

    Did you see the recent programme on the BBC, "The Greatest Raid of All"? A World War II commando raid that, for some reason, has been all but forgotten. And oh my fucking God it was unbelievable.

    There might not be Spartans around these days but, my God, there are people who are close.

    i saw that

    it was awesome

    dush on
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    SilmarilSilmaril Mr Ha Ha Hapless. Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    dush wrote: »
    ferrets54 wrote: »
    Its impossible to know, of course. Most of the best lines in the movies are direct quotes from Herodotus, which is a fine book to read if you have an interest in the subject. But whether or not they gave any particular outcome to the war is irrelevent (though I would argue they did). The point is that these 300 did something over two thousand years ago that no group of men has managed to better since, and their names are seared into human identity. Real life Achilleuses.

    Did you see the recent programme on the BBC, "The Greatest Raid of All"? A World War II commando raid that, for some reason, has been all but forgotten. And oh my fucking God it was unbelievable.

    There might not be Spartans around these days but, my God, there are people who are close.

    i saw that

    it was awesome


    Thats why I'm proud to be British.

    Silmaril on
    t9migZb.jpg
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    ZzuluZzulu Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Silmaril wrote: »
    dush wrote: »
    ferrets54 wrote: »
    Its impossible to know, of course. Most of the best lines in the movies are direct quotes from Herodotus, which is a fine book to read if you have an interest in the subject. But whether or not they gave any particular outcome to the war is irrelevent (though I would argue they did). The point is that these 300 did something over two thousand years ago that no group of men has managed to better since, and their names are seared into human identity. Real life Achilleuses.

    Did you see the recent programme on the BBC, "The Greatest Raid of All"? A World War II commando raid that, for some reason, has been all but forgotten. And oh my fucking God it was unbelievable.

    There might not be Spartans around these days but, my God, there are people who are close.

    i saw that

    it was awesome


    Thats why I'm proud to be British.

    What did the commandos do?

    Zzulu on
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    GreenGreen Stick around. I'm full of bad ideas.Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    ferrets54 wrote: »
    Green wrote: »
    ferrets54 wrote: »
    Ask them how uncomfortably homoerotic it was to be playing a Spartan extra.

    Immortal extras, not Spartan extras


    Oh right of course. That meant they couldn't hang out.

    Pssss! They weren't fighting in real life, dude!

    Green on
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    Si SenorSi Senor Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    ferrets54 wrote: »
    Its impossible to know, of course. Most of the best lines in the movies are direct quotes from Herodotus, which is a fine book to read if you have an interest in the subject. But whether or not they gave any particular outcome to the war is irrelevent (though I would argue they did). The point is that these 300 did something over two thousand years ago that no group of men has managed to better since, and their names are seared into human identity. Real life Achilleuses.

    they are still held up today as the pinnacle of training, using the terrain to your advantage, and showing no fear in the face of danger. and I doubt that feat will be equaled, until we get genetically modified super soldiers.

    Si Senor on
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