Options

I hate everyone on the [Food Network]

1246718

Posts

  • Options
    HalfmexHalfmex I mock your value system You also appear foolish in the eyes of othersRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Javen wrote: »
    Anyone see the iron chef episode where Jeffery Steingarten trashed all of Cat Cora's dishes and it looked like she was going to just start to cry?

    THAT guy is the douchiest person on food network.

    Flay aint got nothin on him
    I dunno, "douchiest guy on Food Network" award for me still goes to that guy that looks like the lead singer for Creed.

    This guy:

    pr_bio_aknowlton.jpg

    He's a judge on Iron Chef America now and again, and he was a judge on one of the other shows on FN. Apart from the fact that he seems to have stolen Scott Stapp's DNA, he also acts like being a columnist for Bon Appétit is important.

    Halfmex on
  • Options
    futilityfutility Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited June 2009
    futility wrote: »
    so food network is now just like tech tv

    this

    this

    this

    THIS

    that?

    futility on
  • Options
    PiptheFairPiptheFair Frequently not in boats. Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Hunter wrote: »
    Yes. I hate Cat Cora and delight to watch her fail on that show.

    her chin is a vital resource in cleaving diamonds

    PiptheFair on
  • Options
    StarfuckStarfuck Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited June 2009
    Halfmex wrote: »
    Javen wrote: »
    Anyone see the iron chef episode where Jeffery Steingarten trashed all of Cat Cora's dishes and it looked like she was going to just start to cry?

    THAT guy is the douchiest person on food network.

    Flay aint got nothin on him
    I dunno, "douchiest guy on Food Network" award for me still goes to that guy that looks like the lead singer for Creed.

    This guy:

    pr_bio_aknowlton.jpg

    He's a judge on Iron Chef America now and again, and he was a judge on one of the other shows on FN. Apart from the fact that he seems to have stolen Scott Stapp's DNA, he also acts like being a columnist for Bon Appétit is important.

    He was a Next iron Chef judge
    That guy is a fuckin tool

    Starfuck on
    jackfaces
    "If you're going to play tiddly winks, play it with man hole covers."
    - John McCallum
  • Options
    Dread Pirate ArbuthnotDread Pirate Arbuthnot OMG WRIGGLY T O X O P L A S M O S I SRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    it is bizarre to me to see him praising Bobby Flay. the man just gives off tremendous douchebag vibes to me.

    I will now describe every thing bobby flay has ever made

    it contains corn, chili powder and is grilled


    I am done

    Bobby Flay make us a dessert

    It's mango.

    Bobby Flay make us a sauce.

    Mango.

    Bobby Flay make us a delicious appetizer before your grilled chillipowder and corn dish.

    Mango!

    Dread Pirate Arbuthnot on
  • Options
    AMP'dAMP'd Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Holy crap

    You're really good at this

    AMP'd on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Options
    AneurhythmiaAneurhythmia Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Javen wrote: »
    the vast majority of original iron chef episodes featured proteins as the secret ingredient: chicken, seafood etc. Comparatively this made it very simple to incorporate and center as each of their dishes, especially since the original didn't really feature the whole scope of the meal like ICA (you'll see a lot of chefs on ICA go through the whole set of courses, whereas Japan didn't as much).

    The difference in creative ingredients on both ends is pretty minimal, though. Chicken was used as a secret ingredient maybe a dozen times during the tenure of the original Iron Chef, for example. Oysters and Shrimp and such were used multiple times, too. America has definitely got its repeat acts but it also has its weird ones, like ostrich and andouille and goat and even beer.
    It hardly even matters what the theme ingredients are when all of the American contestants choose Bobby Flay or Cat Cora, because they know they'll make the same dumb shit every single time.

    Aneurhythmia on
  • Options
    FalloutFallout GIRL'S DAY WAS PRETTY GOOD WHILE THEY LASTEDRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I hate everyone on the [Food Network]

    you hate alton brown?

    i'm going to beat you like a... well, a woman

    Fallout on
    xcomsig.png
  • Options
    AstraphobiaAstraphobia Lightning Bolt! Lightning Bolt! Root! Sleep! Death!Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Chopped is a great show.

    Whenever they get a vegan on there hilarity ensues.

    Astraphobia on
  • Options
    HalfmexHalfmex I mock your value system You also appear foolish in the eyes of othersRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Seriously, no one ever chooses Masahori Mahimoto or that dude with the soul patch.

    90% of the contestants choose Bobby Flay and get their asses handed to them because they choose to battle him on a night where some kind of spice or pepper is the secret ingredient.

    The few times Flay gets beaten (and I mean few; I'm not a connoisseur of this show by any means, but I can count on one hand all of the episodes where I've seen Flay lose), it's because the secret ingredient was scorpion jizz or something, and Flay can't do shit with it because it doesn't marry well with habañero peppers.

    Halfmex on
  • Options
    TheStigTheStig Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Halfmex wrote: »
    Seriously, no one ever chooses Masahori Mahimoto or that dude with the soul patch.

    90% of the contestants choose Bobby Flay and get their asses handed to them because they choose to battle him on a night where some kind of spice or pepper is the secret ingredient.

    The few times Flay gets beaten (and I mean few; I'm not a connoisseur of this show by any means, but I can count on one hand all of the episodes where I've seen Flay lose), it's because the secret ingredient was scorpion jizz or something, and Flay can't do shit with it because it doesn't marry well with habañero peppers.

    I want to see this episode right now!

    TheStig on
    bnet: TheStig#1787 Steam: TheStig
  • Options
    AMP'dAMP'd Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Meanwhile, in China, scorpion jizz wine is invented

    Why would they use all of the scorpion, if the jizz is the most important part?

    AMP'd on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Options
    FalloutFallout GIRL'S DAY WAS PRETTY GOOD WHILE THEY LASTEDRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    bobby flay is a bitch

    Fallout on
    xcomsig.png
  • Options
    MetroidZoidMetroidZoid Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Since everything's pretty much been summed up about Alton Brown (eh, he's watchable and I learn from his shows and that one poster wants to do horrible things to him), I have to say that the Christmas episode of Iron Chef America, and it's little tease of 'Alton's gonna compete' left me pissed when it was all for show. Dammit, I honestly don't think he'd do good without preparation, but a part of me thinks at the same time, he'd be instant genius (especially, you know, if the secret ingredient was Pomegranates ... which stands out in my mind because that's the last episode of Good Eats I saw on Youtube).

    MetroidZoid on
    9UsHUfk.jpgSteam
    3DS FC: 4699-5714-8940 Playing Pokemon, add me! Ho, SATAN!
  • Options
    Dread Pirate ArbuthnotDread Pirate Arbuthnot OMG WRIGGLY T O X O P L A S M O S I SRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Chopped is a great show.

    Whenever they get a vegan on there hilarity ensues.

    I've never seen Chopped, what is it?

    Dread Pirate Arbuthnot on
  • Options
    DislexicDislexic Creepy Uncle Bad Touch Your local playgroundRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Halfmex wrote: »
    Seriously, no one ever chooses Masahori Mahimoto or that dude with the soul patch.

    Ahhhh, unless they've changed the lineup, you're talking about "Molto" Mario Batali, my personal favorite of the chefs on Food Network.

    Dislexic on
    batsig.jpg
  • Options
    AstraphobiaAstraphobia Lightning Bolt! Lightning Bolt! Root! Sleep! Death!Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Chopped is a great show.

    Whenever they get a vegan on there hilarity ensues.

    I've never seen Chopped, what is it?

    Four chefs get a basket with some "mystery" ingredients. There are three incredibly douchy judges who use the ol' Taste, Presentation, Creativity schtick to see who gets cut each round. You have to use every ingredient every round. Winner gets 10,000$.

    Its just so amusing to see some of the ingredients and how it exasperates these chefs time after time.

    Astraphobia on
  • Options
    LasbrookLasbrook It takes a lot to make a stew When it comes to me and youRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Fallout wrote: »
    bobby flay is a bitch

    This is why i love Throwdown with Bobby Flay, motherfucker never wins.

    Lasbrook on
  • Options
    AMP'dAMP'd Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Lasbrook wrote: »
    Fallout wrote: »
    bobby flay is a bitch

    This is why i love Throwdown with Bobby Flay, motherfucker never wins.

    This is what I was talking about earlier

    AMP'd on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Options
    A Dabble Of TheloniusA Dabble Of Thelonius It has been a doozy of a dayRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I may not like the dude, but I addicted to Diners Drive Ins and Dives.

    A Dabble Of Thelonius on
    vm8gvf5p7gqi.jpg
    Steam - Talon Valdez :Blizz - Talonious#1860 : Xbox Live & LoL - Talonious Monk @TaloniousMonk Hail Satan
  • Options
    FizFiz Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    They have a tendency on Chopped to give the chefs a protein that is only good when cooked in a certain way for a certain amount of time, and then criticize the chefs when they aren't able to bend time and space to accomplish this

    Plus one guy dropped meat on the ground, picked it up, and then served it to the judges without getting eliminated. They saw him do this and kept him around.

    Fiz on
    juggcat.jpg
  • Options
    HalfmexHalfmex I mock your value system You also appear foolish in the eyes of othersRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Dislexic wrote: »
    Halfmex wrote: »
    Seriously, no one ever chooses Masahori Mahimoto or that dude with the soul patch.

    Ahhhh, unless they've changed the lineup, you're talking about "Molto" Mario Batali, my personal favorite of the chefs on Food Network.
    Oh, no, I meant the newest guy to the lineup. I can't remember his name for the life of me, Wikipedia to the rescue!

    Michael Symon

    No one ever seems to choose him, at least on any of the episodes I've ever seen, and I've seen a good number of them I think.

    But Batali is awesome. No idea why his one show on the network got iced and he's yet to receive another.

    Although he shares an annoying trait with the also otherwise awesome Giada DeLaurentiis, which is that they'll be speaking with a standard American accent and then all of a sudden whip out a straight-from-the-old-country pronunciation of pancetta or parmesean or something. It's terribly jarring.

    Halfmex on
  • Options
    LasbrookLasbrook It takes a lot to make a stew When it comes to me and youRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    AMP'd wrote: »
    Lasbrook wrote: »
    Fallout wrote: »
    bobby flay is a bitch

    This is why i love Throwdown with Bobby Flay, motherfucker never wins.

    This is what I was talking about earlier

    So you did (sorry i caught up on the last page first then finished the rest).

    I love how he completes the dish once and gets all smug then the assistants tell him what he should do to not suck and he ignores them anyways and proceeds to fail. Think he'd learn.

    Lasbrook on
  • Options
    The Dude With HerpesThe Dude With Herpes Lehi, UTRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Javen wrote: »
    Emeril's not on Food Network anymore.

    What the fuck?

    Are you serious?

    The Dude With Herpes on
    Steam: Galedrid - XBL: Galedrid - PSN: Galedrid
    Origin: Galedrid - Nintendo: Galedrid/3222-6858-1045
    Blizzard: Galedrid#1367 - FFXIV: Galedrid Kingshand

  • Options
    StarfuckStarfuck Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited June 2009
    He does Emeril Green on some other network now
    i think he ambushes people in trader joes or whole foods and teaches them to cook . . . green i guess

    Starfuck on
    jackfaces
    "If you're going to play tiddly winks, play it with man hole covers."
    - John McCallum
  • Options
    PiptheFairPiptheFair Frequently not in boats. Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Fiz wrote: »
    They have a tendency on Chopped to give the chefs a protein that is only good when cooked in a certain way for a certain amount of time, and then criticize the chefs when they aren't able to bend time and space to accomplish this

    Plus one guy dropped meat on the ground, picked it up, and then served it to the judges without getting eliminated. They saw him do this and kept him around.

    god this bugs the fuck out of me so much

    I'm just waiting to see them get brisket or pork butt or something

    PiptheFair on
  • Options
    TheStigTheStig Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I wanna see them get the ingredients for a turbaconducken and see if anyone goes for it.

    TheStig on
    bnet: TheStig#1787 Steam: TheStig
  • Options
    Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister It Gets Worse before it gets any better.Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    SPAM should be an ingredient on Iron Chef.


    And the challenging chef should be a Hawaiian dude.


    Because fuck those fancy-pants bitches and their goddamn Kobe beef and shit. They get spamwhiches and fucking noodles with spam.

    Metzger Meister on
  • Options
    StaxeonStaxeon Buffalo, NYRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I don't even bother with Iron Chef anymore, the old school voice-dubbed episodes with insane chairman Kaga were the best.

    I'm glad I don't see Giada's show on anymore, her mouth always creeped me out. Like it was unnaturally large and filled with 3 times the teeth of a normal human.

    All I watch now are Alton Brown, Tyler Florrance, and Marc Summers.

    Staxeon on
    Invisible nap is the best nap of all time!
    No man should have that kind of power.
    (Twitter)
  • Options
    StaxeonStaxeon Buffalo, NYRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    SPAM should be an ingredient on Iron Chef.


    And the challenging chef should be a Hawaiian dude.


    Because fuck those fancy-pants bitches and their goddamn Kobe beef and shit. They get spamwhiches and fucking noodles with spam.

    They did one that was basically ramen noodles, and the chef's were like "wtf? they cook in 2 mins, we have a goddam hour".

    Staxeon on
    Invisible nap is the best nap of all time!
    No man should have that kind of power.
    (Twitter)
  • Options
    TheStigTheStig Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I stopped watching Giada when she started covering up.

    TheStig on
    bnet: TheStig#1787 Steam: TheStig
  • Options
    J3pJ3p Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I loved the dub they gave the older food critic lady in the original Iron Chef

    J3p on
    +./\ 50 ?. 50
  • Options
    PiptheFairPiptheFair Frequently not in boats. Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    would have sex with giada

    just throwing that out there

    PiptheFair on
  • Options
    StarfuckStarfuck Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited June 2009
    i used to watch a lot of sara snow
    but i've only seen reruns for a while, so not sure if they are making new ones or not

    Starfuck on
    jackfaces
    "If you're going to play tiddly winks, play it with man hole covers."
    - John McCallum
  • Options
    FalloutFallout GIRL'S DAY WAS PRETTY GOOD WHILE THEY LASTEDRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    would have sex with giada

    just throwing that out there

    word

    Fallout on
    xcomsig.png
  • Options
    AMP'dAMP'd Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Let's form a splinter thread

    Giada De Laurentiis is Bangin'

    AMP'd on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Options
    StaxeonStaxeon Buffalo, NYRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    J3p wrote: »
    I loved the dub they gave the older food critic lady in the original Iron Chef

    The dubs were FANTASTIC!

    Chen was like a crazy old jolly uncle.

    The old lady was crotchety and nasty.

    And Iron Chef Italian (can't remember his name) was like whiny and kinda douchy.

    Staxeon on
    Invisible nap is the best nap of all time!
    No man should have that kind of power.
    (Twitter)
  • Options
    Dread Pirate ArbuthnotDread Pirate Arbuthnot OMG WRIGGLY T O X O P L A S M O S I SRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Wait do people actually like Unwrapped?

    Dread Pirate Arbuthnot on
  • Options
    PiptheFairPiptheFair Frequently not in boats. Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    sakai was the best chef

    there is no questioning this

    PiptheFair on
  • Options
    Kuribo's ShoeKuribo's Shoe Kuribo's Stocking North PoleRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    unwrapped is kinda cool

    depends on what it's about really

    Kuribo's Shoe on
    xmassig2.gif
Sign In or Register to comment.