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Car collisions and why they are bullshit

13567

Posts

  • KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2009
    Voranth wrote: »
    Kusuguttai wrote: »
    rugby is for fags
    fisticuffs at dawn, sir

    no thanks, you probably dont want to break your nails

    i mean, i heard you just got them did

    Kusuguttai on
  • VoranthVoranth MI NOMBRE, POR CIERTO ES DONTÉ!Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Kusuguttai wrote: »
    Voranth wrote: »
    Kusuguttai wrote: »
    rugby is for fags
    fisticuffs at dawn, sir

    no thanks, you probably dont want to break your nails

    i mean, i heard you just got them did
    hey man

    hey

    you keep my perfectly beautiful nails outta this

    Voranth on
    camo_sig2.png
    PS4: Voranth
  • Blake TBlake T Do you have enemies then? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Kusuguttai wrote: »
    kusu is for fags

    Blake T on
  • Blake TBlake T Do you have enemies then? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    OH YEAH I WENT THERE SISTER

    Blake T on
  • VoranthVoranth MI NOMBRE, POR CIERTO ES DONTÉ!Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    fight fight fight

    Voranth on
    camo_sig2.png
    PS4: Voranth
  • TenTen Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Hey OP guy

    The word is BRAKE

    Also I have never been in an accident nor even put a dent in any car I have ever driven

    But I've had a few close calls

    Ten on
  • PolagoPolago Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Meiz wrote: »
    Polago wrote: »
    On new year's eve on my way out to mully's place (I think), I was smoked by an asian driver who slowed down for me to walk across a crosswalk, gassed when I was in the center of the road, then sped away after I rolled over his hood and off the windshield. Guessing he was drunk cause asians and alcohol in riced integras on new year's, lol stereotypes. Walking home and resting on the couch felt pretty good after that.

    Jesus christ! Are you like an asshole magnet or something that people keep having to pull this shit?

    I'm guessing you should start carrying a gun.

    Nah, it's overwhelmingly good happy encounters with people, so these few bad apples are ok.

    Reminds me of a while back though on Canada Day in 2006. Gertbeef told me to go out and get stupid instead of spending the night in and working on business related paperwork. I headed out to Whyte Ave and had a good time people watching, carousing and having a couple pints o' Guinness. Nearing the end of the night, I struck up a conversation with an attractive and well spoken dyed blonde lass. This lasted 5 minutes until her "boyfriend" and his friend appeared out of nowhere and tried to get violent. I didn't want any trouble, bid them goodnight, and headed out. They followed me trying to pick a fight. Long story short, they wouldn't piss off, got physical, "boyfriend" ended up with a shattered nose in his forehead, and I ended up with a bottle shattered on my head. Three cheers for Canada Day!

    Still a fun night out. :D

    Polago on
  • Blake TBlake T Do you have enemies then? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    What do you want Ten?

    Blake T on
  • KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2009
    Blaket wrote: »
    Kusuguttai wrote: »
    kusu is for fags

    you take that back, your mom is a nice lady

    Kusuguttai on
  • PolagoPolago Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Kusuguttai wrote: »
    Blaket wrote: »
    Kusuguttai wrote: »
    kusu is for fags

    you take that back, your mom is a nice lady

    You imply that fags are not.

    UH OHHHHHH

    Polago on
  • Sir PlatypusSir Platypus Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I abide the rules of the road and have not gotten into an accident.

    So there.

    Sir Platypus on
  • VoranthVoranth MI NOMBRE, POR CIERTO ES DONTÉ!Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I abide the rules of the road and have not gotten into an accident.

    So there.
    young man you go to your room and only come out when you've got whiplash like the rest of us.

    Voranth on
    camo_sig2.png
    PS4: Voranth
  • Sir PlatypusSir Platypus Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    FUCK YOU YOU'RE NOT EVEN MY REAL DAD

    Sir Platypus on
  • Blake TBlake T Do you have enemies then? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I abide the rules of the road and have not gotten into an accident.

    So there.

    Man, I've obeyed the rules of the road to and someone has still gone up my backside.

    Blake T on
  • PolagoPolago Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Only once have I ever gotten infracted for a violation (or committed one full stop), and it was for falling asleep at the wheel, drifting into oncoming traffic, and nearly hitting a police car at full speed before waking up and swerving at the last second. Boy howdy did that change my sleep schedule. Nearly lost my license (which I should have for that incident), and instead got 6 demerits out of a possible 8, and was fined a paltry $400. That was a fun "life flashes before your eyes" moment!

    When our house was broken into, the $400 and violation ticket were both stolen which added to the excitement.

    Before anyone asks, the normal sleeping schedule during college was 3 days up, one night down, and up to 5 days straight being up on rare occasions. Weekly would usually be the minimum for this routine.

    Polago on
  • TenTen Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Blaket wrote: »
    What do you want Ten?

    A fucking medal?

    With 'WORLDS BEST DRIVER' on it

    And 'ALSO HAS A BIG DICK' on the back

    Ten on
  • PolagoPolago Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Ten wrote: »
    Blaket wrote: »
    What do you want Ten?

    A fucking medal?

    With 'WORLDS BEST DRIVER' on it

    And 'ALSO HAS A BIG DICK' on the back

    Add some truck nuts while you're at it.

    Polago on
  • SwillSwill Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I drive alright. Rear-ended some dude once, but it didn't leave a mark on either of us.

    Swill on
  • Blake TBlake T Do you have enemies then? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Ten wrote: »
    Blaket wrote: »
    What do you want Ten?

    A fucking medal?

    With 'WORLDS BEST DRIVER' on it

    And 'ALSO HAS A BIG DICK' on the back

    I was more going for the joke that you went BRAKE and I answered.

    Blake T on
  • PolagoPolago Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Heavy winter driving is the best driving. Drifting and sliding and no actual lanes in the roads. Awesome.

    Polago on
  • VoranthVoranth MI NOMBRE, POR CIERTO ES DONTÉ!Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Polago wrote: »
    Heavy winter driving is the best driving. Drifting and sliding and no actual lanes in the roads. Awesome.
    so being Canadian; basically you mean all the time?

    Voranth on
    camo_sig2.png
    PS4: Voranth
  • GafotoGafoto Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Swill wrote: »
    Rear-ended some dude once, but it didn't leave a mark on either of us.
    Come on Swill.

    Come on.

    Gafoto on
    sierracrest.jpg
  • Chompskers.Chompskers. Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I have never been in an accident in my own car, I did however drive my friends car through a stone wall.
    He was not happy. I do not blame him.

    Chompskers. on
    The lastest of eff-emms.
    P: 1634 0144 0510
    HG: 5285 4128 5154
  • KovakKovak did a lot of drugs married cher?Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    this one time i was tokyo drifting through the zaxby drive through when i hit the guy in front of me

    Kovak on
  • TenTen Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Blaket wrote: »
    Ten wrote: »
    Blaket wrote: »
    What do you want Ten?

    A fucking medal?

    With 'WORLDS BEST DRIVER' on it

    And 'ALSO HAS A BIG DICK' on the back

    I was more going for the joke that you went BRAKE and I answered.

    Oh.

    I just really like medals

    I don't have many trophies

    Ten on
  • PolagoPolago Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Ten wrote: »
    Blaket wrote: »
    Ten wrote: »
    Blaket wrote: »
    What do you want Ten?

    A fucking medal?

    With 'WORLDS BEST DRIVER' on it

    And 'ALSO HAS A BIG DICK' on the back

    I was more going for the joke that you went BRAKE and I answered.

    Oh.

    I just really like medals

    I don't have many trophies

    Should've played more little league. Metal for everything.

    Polago on
  • VoranthVoranth MI NOMBRE, POR CIERTO ES DONTÉ!Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Kovak wrote: »
    this one time i was tokyo drifting through the zaxby drive through when i hit the guy in front of me
    did the extra watch on your arm set to tokyo tick over to drift race hour?

    Voranth on
    camo_sig2.png
    PS4: Voranth
  • TenTen Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Polago wrote: »
    Ten wrote: »
    Blaket wrote: »
    Ten wrote: »
    Blaket wrote: »
    What do you want Ten?

    A fucking medal?

    With 'WORLDS BEST DRIVER' on it

    And 'ALSO HAS A BIG DICK' on the back

    I was more going for the joke that you went BRAKE and I answered.

    Oh.

    I just really like medals

    I don't have many trophies

    Should've played more little league. Metal for everything.

    Not sure many kids place baseball in Aus, my choices were basically football or netball

    Which is why I have a netball trophy from grade 5

    The pleated skirt showed off my legs real well

    Ten on
  • StaleStale Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    in '98 I had a truck way too fast, way too powerful, and way too tall for anyone my age to own.


    I was cruising along Rt 66 outside McLean IL, which at that point runs parallel to I-55. I was behind my future wife, although this was our first "date", and were heading back to her place. She had earlier remarked how she didn't believe me when I said my truck was really fast. It was definitely a sleeper.

    1992 Mitsubishi Mighty Max, stripped to the frame, 4 inch lift, 36" tires, a twin-turbo 3.0L from a 3000gt VR-4 dropped in with custom linkage and gearbox from John Baker performance in Wisconsin. The thing was stupid fast and had morepower then any 18 year old should ever, ever have on a truck as boxy and unstable as that.

    Back to the scene, I decided to show-off so I gunned it and rode up beside her cavalier, chirping, and revving, and generally being a teenage twat.

    Now 66 is a perfectly straight road for 500 god-damn miles EXCEPT along I-55, right there, outside McLean. Right there is a big sweeping S-curve.

    It's 3am.

    I don't see the curve. I don't generally take 66 through McLean. I'm an 18 year old twat.

    I decide it's time to show her what "fast" really is. So I downshift, gun it, and blast ahead. I go from 70 to 120 like that.

    And I run out of road, like that.

    I have a fraction of a second to decide to either plunge into the black of the ditch at 120, or cut the wheel to follow the road.... at 120. I cut the wheel. My tires lost hold, hit the gravel and swung 180-degrees so fast it tore the axle off the frame and twisted it like it was plastic. My headlights swung around to Summer's car just before the front-end lifted vertical as the rear end caught the road and I flipped, end over end, 7 times at 120mph.

    I flipped over the ditch. I flipped over the median between 66 and I-55. I flipped over the southbound lanes, in between traffic. I flipped over the median, and finally came to a stop on the drivers side of the truck, perfectly centered on the breakdown lane of the northbound lane.

    I was not wearing a seat belt, and that is exactly what saved me, as I was tossed through both the side and rear window, and eventually thrown to the floorboard as the cab crushed in to the seat.

    I dislocated my left shoulder, left hip, broke each rib on my left side, splt my head open, had glass in my ears, my nose, my eyes, and down my throat into my lungs. The concussion was as bad as you can get without an open skull fracture, and I lost a LOT of my memory for a very long time.

    Once I came around in the truck, I had so much adrenaline I actually grabbed my left shoulder and put it back in without really feeling it, and pulled myself out of the truck. I couldn't understand why my leg wouldn't work, and why I couldn't breathe very well. I had no concept of what had just happened.


    That was kind of bullshit.

    Stale on
    easysig2.jpg
  • PolagoPolago Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Ten wrote: »
    Polago wrote: »
    Ten wrote: »
    Blaket wrote: »
    Ten wrote: »
    Blaket wrote: »
    What do you want Ten?

    A fucking medal?

    With 'WORLDS BEST DRIVER' on it

    And 'ALSO HAS A BIG DICK' on the back

    I was more going for the joke that you went BRAKE and I answered.

    Oh.

    I just really like medals

    I don't have many trophies

    Should've played more little league. Metal for everything.

    Not sure many kids place baseball in Aus, my choices were basically football or netball

    Which is why I have a netball trophy from grade 5

    The pleated skirt showed off my legs real well

    It was mostly footy for me too with a season of baseball thrown in and some track. And a hard earned music trophy. Ahhhh, pre-teen accomplishments.

    Polago on
  • TenTen Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Polago wrote: »
    Ten wrote: »
    Polago wrote: »
    Ten wrote: »
    Blaket wrote: »
    Ten wrote: »
    Blaket wrote: »
    What do you want Ten?

    A fucking medal?

    With 'WORLDS BEST DRIVER' on it

    And 'ALSO HAS A BIG DICK' on the back

    I was more going for the joke that you went BRAKE and I answered.

    Oh.

    I just really like medals

    I don't have many trophies

    Should've played more little league. Metal for everything.

    Not sure many kids place baseball in Aus, my choices were basically football or netball

    Which is why I have a netball trophy from grade 5

    The pleated skirt showed off my legs real well

    It was mostly footy for me too with a season of baseball thrown in and some track. And a hard earned music trophy. Ahhhh, pre-teen accomplishments.

    My most hard earned trophy is the Key to the City trophy from GTAIV, and that was mostly endurance. Even the bowling trophy I have was an utter fluke, my handicap was so high from playing shit all year that when I fluked a 148 it was enough to put me in first place, hah.

    Also: Holy shit, Stale!

    Ten on
  • SwillSwill Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Gafoto wrote: »
    Swill wrote: »
    Rear-ended some dude once, but it didn't leave a mark on either of us.
    Come on Swill.

    Come on.

    Yeah, in retrospect this is not an exciting post

    Swill on
  • Randall_FlaggRandall_Flagg Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    ONCE AGAIN, stale one-ups everybody else

    WHAT A SURPRISE, STALE

    Randall_Flagg on
  • StaleStale Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    ONCE AGAIN, stale one-ups everybody else

    WHAT A SURPRISE, STALE

    It's not my fault I'm like a fucking magnet for terrible shit.


    It's just what I am.

    Stale on
    easysig2.jpg
  • FaricazyFaricazy Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Stale wrote: »
    in '98 I had a truck way too fast, way too powerful, and way too tall for anyone my age to own.


    I was cruising along Rt 66 outside McLean IL, which at that point runs parallel to I-55. I was behind my future wife, although this was our first "date", and were heading back to her place. She had earlier remarked how she didn't believe me when I said my truck was really fast. It was definitely a sleeper.

    1992 Mitsubishi Mighty Max, stripped to the frame, 4 inch lift, 36" tires, a twin-turbo 3.0L from a 3000gt VR-4 dropped in with custom linkage and gearbox from John Baker performance in Wisconsin.
    hahaha

    you god you were quite a twat weren't you

    <3

    Faricazy on
  • Blake TBlake T Do you have enemies then? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I have heard that story before though.

    God stale go crash something else.

    Blake T on
  • KovakKovak did a lot of drugs married cher?Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    i was anticipating that post

    i could hear him tell the whole story in my head

    Kovak on
  • PolagoPolago Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    The more amusing traffic experiences are those that are just out of place and odd.

    Driving down whitemud highway in Edmonton doing a fairly normal 90km/h (55mph?), the car made a subtle vibration, then a loud metal SNAP, then a wobble, then suddenly I'm much closer to the ground and woops, there goes my wheel flying down the highway in the center lane. Brakes out, I got to skid along the road for a good while, attempting to drive a sparking metal box into the service lane. Perfect 10 landing, couldn't stop laughing. Went and fetched the wheel which had sheared off at the axle and called AMA. They thought it was pretty whacky themselves, and we all had a good laugh.

    Polago on
  • KovakKovak did a lot of drugs married cher?Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    i was actually once in a zaxby's drive through where i did hit the dude in front of me

    it was all like

    bump

    and then we get out

    and nothings even scratched

    so im like sorry bro

    and hes like

    its cool broski

    Kovak on
  • StaleStale Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Faricazy wrote: »
    Stale wrote: »
    in '98 I had a truck way too fast, way too powerful, and way too tall for anyone my age to own.


    I was cruising along Rt 66 outside McLean IL, which at that point runs parallel to I-55. I was behind my future wife, although this was our first "date", and were heading back to her place. She had earlier remarked how she didn't believe me when I said my truck was really fast. It was definitely a sleeper.

    1992 Mitsubishi Mighty Max, stripped to the frame, 4 inch lift, 36" tires, a twin-turbo 3.0L from a 3000gt VR-4 dropped in with custom linkage and gearbox from John Baker performance in Wisconsin.
    hahaha

    you god you were quite a twat weren't you

    <3

    you have no idea



    I was playing slayer at the time




    I may have had a sixer of Natty Light in the toolbox

    Stale on
    easysig2.jpg
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