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MIXED MARTIAL ARTS (nsf pussies)

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    HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Callius wrote: »
    FlatEric wrote: »
    I don't know much about Wing Chun but if that's all genuine then that is fantastic.
    Oh, the story behind Cho Gar is fantastic.

    So, the thing with Wing Chun is that it was developed to fight against the Manchurians, who had control of China at the time. The idea was that martial arts took a fucking long ass time to train (sometimes upwards to 20-25 years) and were filled with very intricate, complex forms. Wing Chun was an attempt to simplify it all and distill it into the base components. That way someone could become proficient within 5 years or whatever.

    So, when the Temple was raided by the Manchurians five of the Wing Chun masters spread to the winds (blah blah blah, yeah it's probably not true, but a fantastic story). One of them wound up on a red junk boat (you know the kind, stereotypical "Chinese" boat). The red junks would cruise around china and put on Opera's for money.

    "Viola!" He thought. That's a perfect place to hide out from the Manchurians! So he continued residing on the junks and they hid their Wing Chun as part of the Opera performance.

    So, while the westernized, Yip Man, Wing Chun most people are familiar with is very stark, this Wing Chun is way more flashy and the forms are actually done to music (from what I can gather). It's really different, but really similar in many ways. I'm totally stoked.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JrBoOd7JQtk

    Hunter on
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    Dorktron9000Dorktron9000 Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    I'm gonna open up a gay bar called The Pulled Groin

    Dorktron9000 on
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    CalliusCallius Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    oogmar wrote: »
    If a bar insists on having a television in it, I am always incredibly pleased when UFC is what's on the screen.

    That is all.
    I fucking hate how every god damned bar and restaurant feels the need to have a TV on all the god damned time.

    Callius on
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    satansfingerssatansfingers Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    I'm gonna open up a gay bar called The Pulled Groin

    you can advertise it as the number one place to hit dudes with your groin

    satansfingers on
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    Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister It Gets Worse before it gets any better.Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    You know what? I can't fault UFC for using blood in their promotions. They know that most people tune in to watch a man be brutally beaten.

    Seriously though, I like to watch because I used to wrestle and I love it as a sport.

    Also holy shit that cut is like a foot long that dude looks like a horror movie.

    Metzger Meister on
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    HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    If I ever open a gay bar I'm just going to call it the Sperm Bank.

    Hunter on
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    Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister It Gets Worse before it gets any better.Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    I wanna open a gay bar called The Fanny Pack

    Anyone wearing a fanny pack gets a free drink.

    Metzger Meister on
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    Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    You know what? I can't fault UFC for using blood in their promotions. They know that most people tune in to watch a man be brutally beaten.[/I]

    yeah, good look getting taken seriously though

    Calamity Jane on
    twitter https://twitter.com/mperezwritesirl michelle patreon https://www.patreon.com/thatwronglove michelle's comic book from IMAGE COMICS you can order http://a.co/dn5YeUD
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    Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister It Gets Worse before it gets any better.Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Anjin-San wrote: »
    You know what? I can't fault UFC for using blood in their promotions. They know that most people tune in to watch a man be brutally beaten.[/i]

    yeah, good look getting taken seriously though

    Yeah, it's kind of shitty to have to appeal to the lowest common denominator to get noticed. I'm sure as the sport matures they'll start presenting themselves in a more dignified manner. Like boxing, say.

    Metzger Meister on
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    ZzuluZzulu Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    My first UFC fight I watched (incidentally the first one aired where I live) was a fight with BJ penn and Joe stevenson.


    oh god there was so much blooood

    and then BJ penn licks his bloodied gloves as he wins the match and ...


    I was hooked.

    Zzulu on
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    Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    here's a model we can all understand for why UFC isn't taken seriously

    mortal kombat is enjoyed by many people

    but it is enjoyed most by the lowest common denominator because it is simple and it is full of blood

    Calamity Jane on
    twitter https://twitter.com/mperezwritesirl michelle patreon https://www.patreon.com/thatwronglove michelle's comic book from IMAGE COMICS you can order http://a.co/dn5YeUD
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    CalliusCallius Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Yeah, it's kind of shitty to have to appeal to the lowest common denominator to get noticed. I'm sure as the sport matures they'll start presenting themselves in a more dignified manner. Like boxing, say.
    My guess is that they'll go the WWF route.

    Callius on
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    CalliusCallius Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Anjin... how come it's only now that I've grown to appreciate what you have to offer?

    Callius on
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    JavenJaven Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    I fight in a local MMA league almost every week but watching it on television tends to bore the piss out of me.

    Javen on
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    oogmaroogmar Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Callius wrote: »
    oogmar wrote: »
    If a bar insists on having a television in it, I am always incredibly pleased when UFC is what's on the screen.

    That is all.
    I fucking hate how every god damned bar and restaurant feels the need to have a TV on all the god damned time.

    Ditto, dude. I'm glad Portland hasn't fully succumbed to that. Maybe 3 in 4 have them, but usually they're on mute and you have to go out of your way to see it. I loved New Orleans. From Uptown to Bourbon, I didn't see a single TV in a bar or restaurant.

    oogmar on
    Rane, you lazy bastard, you can shut the hell up.

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    ZzuluZzulu Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Violence is entertaining.

    The ancient romans had it right gf-smug.gif

    Zzulu on
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    Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister It Gets Worse before it gets any better.Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Callius wrote: »
    Anjin... how come it's only now that I've grown to appreciate what you have to offer?

    He's like a cactus flower. Beautiful but difficult to get close to.

    Metzger Meister on
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    CalliusCallius Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    He's like a cactus flower. Beautiful but difficult to get close to.
    I dunno dude, when he punches he leaves a giant fucking hole in his weak side and his elbows are always kipped out.

    Pretty easy to get up close to that.

    TOPICAL!

    Callius on
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    Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Callius wrote: »
    He's like a cactus flower. Beautiful but difficult to get close to.
    I dunno dude, when he punches he leaves a giant fucking hole in his weak side and his elbows are always kipped out.

    Pretty easy to get up close to that.

    TOPICAL!

    i was just throwing punches

    in actual practice everything has a movement and tempo

    you sorta move lower as you'll have a shorter distance between the arms and the sides

    you're constantly moving

    when it gets to the actual situation of fighting you are ready to defend and attack tit for tat

    Calamity Jane on
    twitter https://twitter.com/mperezwritesirl michelle patreon https://www.patreon.com/thatwronglove michelle's comic book from IMAGE COMICS you can order http://a.co/dn5YeUD
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    Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    in practice the arm movement looks pretty silly

    Calamity Jane on
    twitter https://twitter.com/mperezwritesirl michelle patreon https://www.patreon.com/thatwronglove michelle's comic book from IMAGE COMICS you can order http://a.co/dn5YeUD
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    CalliusCallius Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Anjin-San wrote: »
    i was just throwing punches

    in actual practice everything has a movement and tempo

    you sorta move lower as you'll have a shorter distance between the arms and the sides

    you're constantly moving

    when it gets to the actual situation of fighting you are ready to defend and attack tit for tat
    Awww, I'z just joshin' ya'!

    Callius on
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    Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    alternatively: people come to appreciate me more because they have substance abuse issues or realize i'm white and therefore not scary

    Calamity Jane on
    twitter https://twitter.com/mperezwritesirl michelle patreon https://www.patreon.com/thatwronglove michelle's comic book from IMAGE COMICS you can order http://a.co/dn5YeUD
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    BelruelBelruel NARUTO FUCKS Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    what it is anjin <3

    Belruel on
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    CalliusCallius Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Anjin-San wrote: »
    alternatively: people come to appreciate me more because they have substance abuse issues or realize i'm white and therefore not scary
    I was pretty much entirely drunk for the past thirty years.

    I was drinking in the womb.

    Callius on
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    Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Belruel wrote: »
    what it is anjin <3
    chilling and such

    Calamity Jane on
    twitter https://twitter.com/mperezwritesirl michelle patreon https://www.patreon.com/thatwronglove michelle's comic book from IMAGE COMICS you can order http://a.co/dn5YeUD
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    ZzuluZzulu Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    I saw a silva fight where he kicked I think

    fuck I forget who

    twice in the nuts

    like

    hard


    both were accidental and such legal

    yeah in this fight on saturday the dude kept going for inside leg kicks, and then one time he went a little higher and bam

    straight in the nuts

    they delayed the fight because akiyama was just curled into a ball


    Yeah he pretty much starts crawling.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eriGC-GT_W4

    Also, making youtube clips is easier than I thought

    Zzulu on
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    Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    godddddd ow

    Calamity Jane on
    twitter https://twitter.com/mperezwritesirl michelle patreon https://www.patreon.com/thatwronglove michelle's comic book from IMAGE COMICS you can order http://a.co/dn5YeUD
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    CalliusCallius Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    SPLORT!

    Callius on
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    Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    wladimir klitschko is the sort of fellow who uses some sort of demented wizardry to give cats scary vietnam flashbacks

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JW0S0759BTs

    Calamity Jane on
    twitter https://twitter.com/mperezwritesirl michelle patreon https://www.patreon.com/thatwronglove michelle's comic book from IMAGE COMICS you can order http://a.co/dn5YeUD
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    ZzuluZzulu Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    I haven't watched boxing in forever

    Zzulu on
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    Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    his big brother is to nobodies surprise significantly fucking scarier

    Calamity Jane on
    twitter https://twitter.com/mperezwritesirl michelle patreon https://www.patreon.com/thatwronglove michelle's comic book from IMAGE COMICS you can order http://a.co/dn5YeUD
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    ButtersButters A glass of some milks Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Anjin-San wrote: »
    alternatively: people come to appreciate me more because they have substance abuse issues or realize i'm white and therefore not scary

    You are a black man and very scary you god damn liar.

    Butters on
    PSN: idontworkhere582 | CFN: idontworkhere | Steam: lordbutters | Amazon Wishlist
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    Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    it's true!

    Calamity Jane on
    twitter https://twitter.com/mperezwritesirl michelle patreon https://www.patreon.com/thatwronglove michelle's comic book from IMAGE COMICS you can order http://a.co/dn5YeUD
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    ButtersButters A glass of some milks Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Anjin, lets play something.

    Butters on
    PSN: idontworkhere582 | CFN: idontworkhere | Steam: lordbutters | Amazon Wishlist
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    Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    what would you consider sir

    Calamity Jane on
    twitter https://twitter.com/mperezwritesirl michelle patreon https://www.patreon.com/thatwronglove michelle's comic book from IMAGE COMICS you can order http://a.co/dn5YeUD
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    ButtersButters A glass of some milks Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Get in vent

    Butters on
    PSN: idontworkhere582 | CFN: idontworkhere | Steam: lordbutters | Amazon Wishlist
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    FlatEricFlatEric Leaves from the vine, Falling so slow Like fragile, tiny shells, Drifting in the foamRegistered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Callius wrote: »
    FlatEric wrote: »
    I don't know much about Wing Chun but if that's all genuine then that is fantastic.
    Oh, the story behind Cho Gar is fantastic.

    So, the thing with Wing Chun is that it was developed to fight against the Manchurians, who had control of China at the time. The idea was that martial arts took a fucking long ass time to train (sometimes upwards to 20-25 years) and were filled with very intricate, complex forms. Wing Chun was an attempt to simplify it all and distill it into the base components. That way someone could become proficient within 5 years or whatever.

    So, when the Temple was raided by the Manchurians five of the Wing Chun masters spread to the winds (blah blah blah, yeah it's probably not true, but a fantastic story). One of them wound up on a red junk boat (you know the kind, stereotypical "Chinese" boat). The red junks would cruise around china and put on Opera's for money.

    "Viola!" He thought. That's a perfect place to hide out from the Manchurians! So he continued residing on the junks and they hid their Wing Chun as part of the Opera performance.

    So, while the westernized, Yip Man, Wing Chun most people are familiar with is very stark, this Wing Chun is way more flashy and the forms are actually done to music (from what I can gather). It's really different, but really similar in many ways. I'm totally stoked.

    Wow. Taking into account the tendency for martial arts' origin stories to be exaggerated, I wonder how much of that is true.

    At any rate congratulations man, it sounds like one hell of an opportunity.

    FlatEric on
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    DefenderDefender Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Callius wrote: »
    "Viola!" He thought. That's a perfect place to hide out from the Manchurians! So he continued residing on the junks and they hid their Wing Chun as part of the Opera performance.

    Wait so he hid in somebody's viola?

    Defender on
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    TheOneWhoStoodUpTheOneWhoStoodUp Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Goddamnit. Now I have to write a wall. The UFC is murdering MMA as a sport and tradition in North America. Dana White, while a superb business man in many ways, doesn't give a shit about MMA as an actual trade, but instead as trash TV. Hence reality show. Hence Brock Lesnar.

    UFC has a lot of fighters who are absolutely nothing compared to the international standard of the professional level, particularly in every weight class below light-heavy, with a few exceptions (notably George St-Pierre, Dan Henderson and Nogueira).

    Let me use a few examples that are indicative of the general direction Dana White is taking the sport.

    1.) Brock Lesnar. A fighter who had only fought professionally in MMA once before (against sideshow "I've lost to Bob Sapp and Mighty Mo" Min-Soo Kim, barely a blip on the MMA professional radar), gets to fight Frank Mir, who is ranked highly in the UFC at the time (and still is). Ludicrous on its own that he didn't have to fight anyone lower-ranked in the division. Dana White did this because he knew that Brock Lesnar is marketable to the fucking monster-truck rally watching hicks that is his main demographic. Brock Lesnar loses in the first round to a humiliatingly simple submission in less than a minute and a half.
    In a continuing disregard of even a pretense of an actual ranking system or more than bullshit tournament set-up, he fights Heath Herring, another highly ranked UFC heavyweight. Heath Herring is a fighter much like Brock in many ways. He's one dimensional. He's also been beaten by almost everyone in his weight class that's worth their salt.

    So Brock takes it home with a decision.

    He is then given a goddamn title shot, against an aging Randy Couture. Another product of UFC marketing. Randy Couture has lost to a gambit of fighters and was a champion that absolutely anyone in the UFC heavyweight division could take the belt from. He belongs in light heavy. Don't get me wrong, Couture belongs in the sport, and he's a wonderful guy. But he's never been tested by internationally recognized fighters that rule the heavyweight division globally and won.

    He then fights Frank Mir. Yet again, a product of UFC marketing. Mir's most impressive victory came with his win over Nogueira, a great fighter with a long history of success against the greats of the international heavyweight division. Mir took home a TKO victory. I would say a rematch would unlikely go the same way, as I think it was a lucky break. Mir's record otherwise is entirely unremarkable. Wins against Wes Simms and Tank fucking Abbot. Yippee. His one win against Nogueira was enough for Dana White to convince people that he was god's gift to his weight class. Fuck off.

    Brock Lesnar pummels an unremarkable fighter for the unified championship. Trucker-hat wearing retards everywhere in North America feel vindicated.

    2.) B. J. Penn. Fuck sakes. Again, UFC marketing. The man has one skill, and that is the ability to effectively gain and cut weight. He has three straight wins against the unimpressive below-light heavy fighters of Sherk, Stevenson and fucking Pulver. Almost not even worth mentioning.

    3.) The Pride takover and dissolution, and Dana White's American-centric business style.

    Pride FC, a far more globally recognized organization than the UFC in its time, was stacked with great talent. It started out with a focus on heavyweight, but soon grew a roster of the best middle, welter and light weight fighters that are still rampaging through non-UFC organizations (or UFC itself, in the case of Henderson) today.

    Pride, however, being a Japanese corporation (with a history of shady dealings with criminal elements), was not nearly as financially solvent as the UFC, though a much less-watched US-owned organization. UFC's controller, Zuffa Corporation, thus decided to buy out Pride, and within months had shut it down. White had begun offering contracts to the champs in Pride to fight in the UFC. These contracts are the stuff of legal nightmares. He offered all the champions of each division the same contracts with the following clauses:

    - You cannot fight in any other organization for the duration of your contract.
    (Unheard of. Fedor Emelianenko notably fights in the International and Russian Sambo championships every goddamn year, and considers it his duty to what he thinks of as the national sport. Many fighters in Pride would occasionally take a few fights in K-1)

    -Significant pay cut.
    (The average payout for for a champion fighter in the UFC per fight is rarely more than 5 digits. Pride champs never got less than 6. Assumably, the UFC fighters earn more in advertising revenue, however)

    - 8 year contract.
    (What the fuck.)

    -If at any point you lose during your contract, the UFC can terminate that contract immediately after the fight.

    -If you are undefeated for the duration of 8 years, your contract can be automatically renewed by the UFC without your consultation.

    Essentially, none of the fighters would be able to retire undefeated. What this all comes down to is that Dana White, it seems, was essentially trying to bring over Pride champions (who, with the exception of Henderson, were all non-Americans) so that he could display them to the US, wait until they lose to an American, and then get rid of them, assuring the Western viewing audience that yes, Americans are the greatest fighters in the world, and we don't have to worry about those nasty Japanese, Koreans, Russians, Dutch, Polish and Ukrainians anymore. Let's focus on the Americans (and the odd Canadian).

    Conjecture on my part, sure, but the contracts offered are absolutely unprecedented.

    White completely neglected the contenders in the Pride weight classes, but instead scratched the bottom of the barrel, taking fighters like Ryo Chonan, who had received brutal losses at the hands Filho, Henderson and the meatbag Phil Baroni, and only eked out close decision wins of Villasenor and Newton. Pride would have dropped him long before, had he not achieved a ridiculous flying scissor heel hook on Anderson Silva early in his Pride career.

    Do I think all the fighters in the UFC are terrible? Absolutely not. Do I think that the UFC isn't entertaining? Certainly not.

    My problem with the UFC is that Dana White is not interested in creating an environment of a competitive sport that is still in its mass media nascency. He's interested in marketing a product that has nothing to do with what the real talent of the MMA world is. Nothing to do with securing talent and making cards based off of a fair system of objective ranking. He's interested in making a drama. A reality show where people hit each other.

    I've been on the periphery of the MMA world for several years now. I've met, and been to the training sessions of pros, their managers and their trainers. I have no illusion that I could adequately compete with many of the fighters in the UFC at the professional level. I do, however, know that the UFC is not what it's telling the world that it is: a showcase of the greatest MMA fighters in the world. It's killing the spirit of MMA that existed before the cut-throat business style of White. He's looking to create a monopoly on MMA viewing, and then control that viewing to only what is marketable, not that which is exceptional in the sport.

    TheOneWhoStoodUp on
    That's pretty far out, man!
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    DefenderDefender Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    2.) B. J. Penn. Fuck sakes. Again, UFC marketing. The man has one skill, and that is the ability to effectively gain and cut weight.

    Yeah, that and compete in MMA.

    Defender on
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