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I'm about to walk away from my career (updated and plz lock)
StormCrow420
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
So a little background. In college I studied fine art at one of the better commercial art schools in the US. Sometime in my senior year I realized that I did not want to become a commercial artist, and that coincided with the great big dot com crash of 2001 and the entire world going fucking bananas later that year, effectively sealed me off from pursuing work in that field.
For the next six years after college I worked different jobs, mostly as a line cook, coffee maker, that really sarcastic guy at the crappy local video store. Then in 2006 when I was particularly miserable working in a kitchen my step father offered me an entry level accounting position in his company, a fortune 500 construction company. The long and the short of it was, I was sick of being broke, I had just been dumped, all my friends were drug addicts and I wanted to get the hell out of my life. So I took this opportunity.
Now I knew next to nothing about accounting or construction, but they assured me they could teach me everything I needed to know. I moved to New York City and spent the next year and a half working an insane amount of hours and busting my ass. And it worked. I was indentified by the powers that be of the company as management potential, and put on the fast track to being one of the senior accountants of the company. While the money isn't fantastic at the moment, and the cost of living in NYC is crazy, I am saving some and I am assured a big pay day after 5-8 years with the company, and will eventually retire a millionare. No doubt about it if I continue on my present course.
But the corporate culture does not agree with me. Certain elements in my company, in an effort to make themselves look better, have implemented a series of audits and checklists that are mind numbingly extensive. Where my job before was 50% accounting, 25% training and 25% dealing with day to day stuff, now my job is about 80-90% prepping for audits. My real work is suffering greatly, and while nothing big has gotten dropped, I'm afraid it's only a matter of time that I overlook something important, and in the cut throat world of new york construction you can't afford to miss a step.
At this point I honestly feel that I am damned if I do and damned if I don't. I can embrace these new audits and let my real work suffer, which I will be disciplined for, or I can ignore these new audits and focus on my real work, at which point I will be disciplined for ignoring these audits.
This has me so stressed out and frustrated that I can feel my body physically reacting to it. I have an opportunity here to be successful beyond my wildest dreams, but it's slipping away from me because of the mindless bureaucrats who have forced these audits on us. I won't bore you with the details, but rest assured it represents the worst of anal retentive corporate bullshit.
Meanwhile, all my friends out west are getting their grower's licenses and entiring the rapidly expanding field of legal marijuana cultivation. I have no less than three opportunities right now to move out west and move in with growers. At this point I have to ask myself who am I kidding? I'm not an east coast accountant with a 401k and a mortgage. I'm a freaky art school reject who wants to get high and watch cartoons. I was smart enough to get the hell out of the north east when I was 17, what the hell am I doing back here 12 years later?
I'm not married, no kids, some debt but nothing crazy. I turn 30 next month. I am sick of my fucking job and the people I work with. Financially, I would need to wait till next February to make a move of any kind, if I walked away now I'd be flat fucking broke, but by February if I stick to my savings plan I'll be alright for a few months, long enough to get settled and find a part time job to make ends meet. After that I am confident in my own ability to be successful.
I realize that some of the things that are keeping me from being happy are my own problems, and I can't run away from them.
So should I stay the course and wait for this audit pendelum to swing away, keeping my future secure and my wealth intact? Or should I live on bread and water for the next 6 months, save every penny, then shake off the shackles of oppression for a life of hemp cultivation and marmalade skies?
For the next six years after college I worked different jobs, mostly as a line cook, coffee maker, that really sarcastic guy at the crappy local video store. Then in 2006 when I was particularly miserable working in a kitchen my step father offered me an entry level accounting position in his company, a fortune 500 construction company. The long and the short of it was, I was sick of being broke, I had just been dumped, all my friends were drug addicts and I wanted to get the hell out of my life. So I took this opportunity.
Now I knew next to nothing about accounting or construction, but they assured me they could teach me everything I needed to know. I moved to New York City and spent the next year and a half working an insane amount of hours and busting my ass. And it worked. I was indentified by the powers that be of the company as management potential, and put on the fast track to being one of the senior accountants of the company. While the money isn't fantastic at the moment, and the cost of living in NYC is crazy, I am saving some and I am assured a big pay day after 5-8 years with the company, and will eventually retire a millionare. No doubt about it if I continue on my present course.
But the corporate culture does not agree with me. Certain elements in my company, in an effort to make themselves look better, have implemented a series of audits and checklists that are mind numbingly extensive. Where my job before was 50% accounting, 25% training and 25% dealing with day to day stuff, now my job is about 80-90% prepping for audits. My real work is suffering greatly, and while nothing big has gotten dropped, I'm afraid it's only a matter of time that I overlook something important, and in the cut throat world of new york construction you can't afford to miss a step.
At this point I honestly feel that I am damned if I do and damned if I don't. I can embrace these new audits and let my real work suffer, which I will be disciplined for, or I can ignore these new audits and focus on my real work, at which point I will be disciplined for ignoring these audits.
This has me so stressed out and frustrated that I can feel my body physically reacting to it. I have an opportunity here to be successful beyond my wildest dreams, but it's slipping away from me because of the mindless bureaucrats who have forced these audits on us. I won't bore you with the details, but rest assured it represents the worst of anal retentive corporate bullshit.
Meanwhile, all my friends out west are getting their grower's licenses and entiring the rapidly expanding field of legal marijuana cultivation. I have no less than three opportunities right now to move out west and move in with growers. At this point I have to ask myself who am I kidding? I'm not an east coast accountant with a 401k and a mortgage. I'm a freaky art school reject who wants to get high and watch cartoons. I was smart enough to get the hell out of the north east when I was 17, what the hell am I doing back here 12 years later?
I'm not married, no kids, some debt but nothing crazy. I turn 30 next month. I am sick of my fucking job and the people I work with. Financially, I would need to wait till next February to make a move of any kind, if I walked away now I'd be flat fucking broke, but by February if I stick to my savings plan I'll be alright for a few months, long enough to get settled and find a part time job to make ends meet. After that I am confident in my own ability to be successful.
I realize that some of the things that are keeping me from being happy are my own problems, and I can't run away from them.
So should I stay the course and wait for this audit pendelum to swing away, keeping my future secure and my wealth intact? Or should I live on bread and water for the next 6 months, save every penny, then shake off the shackles of oppression for a life of hemp cultivation and marmalade skies?
StormCrow420 on
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(It actually sounds like a horrible, pie-in-the-sky kind of dream to me, but that may just be opinion)
Believe it or not it is actually pretty realistic. I have the knowledge and the contacts to make it work. One of the things that is drawing me to it is the realization is I'm more of a fringe type person than mainstream, and I'm just kidding myself pretending I'm not.
But I could very well be chasing pie-in-the-sky, as you said, but at 29 with no real responsibilities, I'm thinking why not?
Anyway, thanks for your advice and doing battle with my massive wall of text.
Personally, I feel my job is not me. I work where I'm at now simply because stable employment allows me to provide myself and my wife the things we enjoy. I let my wilder dreams go when I realized that.
Every few months I have to put my foot down, have a friendly and professional chat with the users and our supervisors, and say 'Hey, I no longer have time to work on the next project that actually earns us money because I spend all day doing this mind numbing data entry work. We need to reduce the mind numbing work, hire someone else to do some of it, or let me finish some of this stuff so the real users can use it."
I've never gotten in trouble for doing this and only rarely have had people not completely agree with me. Now, my preferred solutions are not always how it's resolved, sometimes it is just an understanding that I've got too much to do and so some things are going to be put on hold or late and an acceptance that in my rushed, overworked state, some mistakes are going to happen.
I mean, sure, if you can move on to something else that will make you more happy and allow you to live happily, then by all means, go for it. But really, moving out with your friends who you already decided once were dragging you down (unless I have misunderstood and these are different friends) to be a professional pot head doesn't sound terribly likely to end up being a successful career choice. If your current issues can be resolved by a simple "hey, this just doesn't work, can we discuss it?", that seems like a better option.
The thing you have to consider is that if you fail, what other options do you have? Can you get back into construction? Find a decent job elsewhere? Back to school? Have a contingency plan.
There are good arguments on both sides, but the thing I can't get away from is this feeling that I have no business being in my current situation. I am not this guy. I may do a hell of a job pretending to this guy, but I don't know how much longer I can keep up the act. Better to bow out gracefully with my exit strategy and leave with the bridges intact than blow the fuck up at everyone who comes into my office until I give myself a heart attack.
oh any for the record, my contigency plan is suicide by cop.
What I'm getting at is that this is one of the newest industries around, which is shaky at best legally.
Not to say you shouldn't quit your job. I'm all for big changes in life. Just don't jump into something you'll regret later. After all, didn't you ditch your drug addict friends already?
The feeling of not wanting to be there will not go away, it will just get worse. Have a plan, then do what
you want to do.
Farming of any type is never very profitable. Marijuana is only profitable when it's illegal. Legal marijuana is just a cash crop, like spinach or peas.
It isn't so much about the money, it's really about getting back outside the establishment. I'm not against the entire establishment, but being a senior accountant for a construction company in the mecca of capitalist corruption is much further down the path than I ever expected to go.
As far as my drug addict friends go, the worst of the bunch have moved out of my circle, but yes I'm talking about returning to a place and people that I left behind me three years ago.
Tricky.
Any well-paying job is going to be stressful. That's why it's well-paying to begin with; not everyone can do it.
Make your money, enjoy your success, and balance the rest of your life out. Your life is not your job, but it sure as Hell looks to me like you've got a good one. Also, now is REALLY not the time to be jumping ship out of a good job.
9 out of 10 east coast accountants are kids who wanted to get high and watch cartoons, or who wanted to be in the pro leagues, travel the world, play to sold out stadium audiences...
At some point, usually when life starts kicking them in the balls, everyone one of those 9 accountants is going to say to themselves "This is not who I am! I'm really a stoner/footballer/vagrant/rockstar!" And they're going to seriously consider throwing it all in. Maybe some of them will.
Perhaps you're right, and this crisis has caused you to realise that you're not the man your life has cast you as. But for fuck's sake, leave on your own terms.
You have three years experience in a management position at a fortune 500 company. There are thousands of jobs out there with less stress and less bullshit that would love your experience and skills.
I noticed that in your post you never wrote that you don't enjoy your job. You only said that the corporate culture doesn't agree with you. You know what will happen if you quit and move to your couch? You'll get bored.
Whether you realise it or not, you're not the type of guy who wants to lie on his couch, get high and watch cartoons anymore - in the same way that those other 9 accounts can't play football, guitar, etc, you can't do nothing. I almost guarantee it.
Knuckle down until feb. Start looking for other, more attractive jobs with a better life/work balance.
When your boss, supervisor, etc, asks you to perform one of these tedious audits you come back with "Well Sir, I can do that for you. However, to get that done I'm going to have to drop X and Y, and Z might be postponed. It's up to you, but -insert your professional opinion about your priorities here-".
It lets them know you are conscious of how much work you receive and are able to accomplish, shows you are thinking about the best for the company, AND puts the ball firmly in their court. They tell you to do the audit, ok then, XY and Z take a back seat, you focus on knocking out the audit, then move on. They tell you to do XY and Z first, the audit gets the back seat.
I hope that helps some.
I seem to like telling anecdotes about my own experience. Just a random observation.
Can I come work for you? I can do things, you know, for it... o_O :winky:
To the OP, I can't say one way or the other about growing, but if I were a bettin' man, I'd bet on The Man. So if you don't like the Big City Life, look for a company that better matches your lifestyle. Caribou Coffee, Whole Foods, Trader Joe's, Timbuk2, many more national, and a hundred more regional/local companies need accountants, and might be more your pace.
Otherwise what Iceman said about talking to your boss if you decide to stay.
This is the best advice.
Thank you, Rubacava!
This is probably the best advice I've seen. It took me 9 months of getting walked on to learn to say this before saying 'SURE CAN DO BOSS, ANYTHING YOU WANT.'
Hey do whatever you want in this life.
But you make damn sure that you shoot for the stars while doing it. Thats the criteria by how you measure a plan: will I get everything I want and more, will I look back when i'm 90 and think "hell yeah I made it happen!".
Nobody has to work a job they hate... but you've got to realise that being stoned on the couch watching cartoons is going to make you massively unhappy now, because you know what you can acheive if you put your mind to it.
Your friends don't know that feeling and wont understand.
Exercise, meditation, hobbies, etc.
Also may some time off on vacation to relax and get re-charged. It might just been good old fashion burn out. That happens to me a lot when I'm working long hours, weekends and under lots of stress/pressure/dead lines.
If anything, I would say; take some time off and really think about it. Most people, including myself, don't make good decisions when they are overworked, tried and super stressed. So, take some time off, relax and then think about it.
I can't tell my boss that z is going to be postponed because x and y need to get done. He's to busy working on letters a-w to care. Actually the guy does care, most of us agree that we are all stretched way to thin, but nothing is being done about it. That's the trouble with this compliance stuff,
I will find no balance as long as I remain with this company, so I'm thinking looking for new work in the field is the best option.
You remind me of my father. He's worked at the same company for 20+ years and when he originally got hired, it was a small operation. After the company got bought out repeatedly over the years, he is putting in 60-80 hour work weeks, traveling all over the world (which isn't too much fun for a grounded man), and is expected to study new bits of software in his free time.
He's earning a decent keep, but sometimes he is miserable.
In the end, you need to ask yourself whether the company you are working for matches your personality type. There are places like google where you work 60-70-80 hour work weeks, but the environment is a bit more relaxed with on site catering, yoga, and a lenient dress code. Then you have a company like Think Geek which is still a pretty small operation where they put in some decent hours but have fun while doing it.
Then you have EA games where "challenge everything" also encompasses how much you're willing to tolerate. So best of luck to you - I'm on the lookout for a company that meets eye to eye with my personality as well - luckily for you, the job you currently have has given you a ton of leverage and experience in accounting. I'm sure you'll find an environment that is both fun and gives you a good amount of job satisfaction, given that you don't settle for less.
Saw some friends, did some hiking, got some sun, smoked some grass and dealt with stress. Tough to think about realistically quitting your job when you can afford to fly to the opposite coast at a moments notice, rent a convertable, and buy about, say, half of the cash crop.
The biggest indicator was watching my friend's lifestyle. Maybe not as many hours, but just as hectic, just as crowded.
Now I'm back in New York, back at work, and things are going okay. One day at a time.
What I did do is cut my 401k withholdings back in an effort to have more cash on hand so I can clear up some debt. Not a huge contributer to my stress, I actually like having a little debt as long as I have something to show for it, it keeps me grounded, but I have enough right now where I am just blowing money on interest.
I'll make it to February and see where things go from there. Important to take a few days off and re-evaluate things. Thanks for everyones thoughts.
Definitely eliminating as much debt as possible before a major career/living change is a good idea.