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Crazy Girlfriend/Boyfriend Stories

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Posts

  • SAW776SAW776 Registered User
    edited August 2009
    chasm wrote: »
    I'm not known for making excellent decisions but I mean free anal and a movie seems like a good deal to me.

    Till she disembowels you in your sleep.


    Your fatal mistake was sleeping.

    420, anal erryday?

    Also, I'd feel like I was taking advantage of Alyce if I was like, "Yo Alyce, I know your life is bad right now, so you should send me an adorable ninja penguin thingy for free."
    I'd also like some photos of said thingies

    I intend to pay her. Lord knows the poor girl has enough problems what with lacking porn star tits and giving gifts to people she's dating.

    Oh the things we could get her to make though. We could put her through college. Who needs to strip when you can sew stuffed animals for nerds? :lol:

    SAW776 on
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  • DoctorArchDoctorArch Curmudgeon Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    Bardi wrote: »
    Haha, no. he was in the military, so quite the opposite of a mullet.


    Damn my non-pornstar tits. Damn them to hell.


    Speaking of hell, I wasn't 'allowed' to day any sort of curse. Not even 'damn' or 'hell'. or else he'd get furious and like... smack my arm or something ridiculous.
    There was no "lets go see hellboy"... he would avoid those words so much it would be "Lets go see that movie with that red guy" "hellboy?" "WHAAAT ARRAGGLBLAGHL"

    i read the thread in H/A too, and i admit to being incredibly confused about this. Since you guys had sex, however rarely, it couldn't be because he was religious, so what possible objection could he have to swearing?

    good job dumping him though, he sounds like a raging ass.

    on topic, I seemed to attract the crazy girls throughout middle and high-school. However, I was lucky enough to avoid long-term relationships with them, and therefore have nothing to contribute to this thread :?

    He wasn't religious at all. I think it was because he thought it was crude, or rude, or impolite. This is coming from a guy who, i think... said 'thank you' to me once the whole time we were dating.

    Also, when something was bothering him, he REFUSED to tell me what it was. He wouldn't talk, he would speak, sometimes he'd cry when he thought I wasn't looking or something. No matter how many times I've asked him to speak what was on his mind, he wouldn't, and he'd get REALLy mad for my concern.

    Another thing was if I bought or made anything for him, he'd yell at me. He went away for a military thing for a while, and I decided to sew him a little stuffed penguin, and a tiny ninja. I thought it was cute, and nice, so I gave them to him, and he was furious. He yelled at me because I "knew he didn't like receiving gifts" and how I apparently don't listen ever.

    I'm so glad I'm done with him. SO GLAD

    Good lord. If someone sewed me a little stuffed penguin and a tiny ninja I would be so "dawwwww, you're the besh-test." I would probably even tear up a little bit. Yes, yes I am a sap, and proud of it.

    DoctorArch on
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  • NocrenNocren Lt Futz, Back in Action North CarolinaRegistered User regular
    edited August 2009
    Xtarath wrote: »
    My buddy from back home got himself a bit of a stalker once.
    (this is a long'un)
    Must have been about a year and a half ago now? Maybe more?
    She walked into the Game store where I worked and I went over to do my salesperson spiel ("What is it you're looking for? Who are you buying for? WHY NOT GET A PS3?!") she said she just came in to see if there were any hot guys working here but she supposes not (ego = bruised) and I say "well, you'll probably like Andy, he's your typical pretty boy but he's not working today"
    She tells me that she's going to be working in the Game store in the shopping centre at the other end of the street our store is on and heads off.

    There's nothing for a couple of weeks and then we get a call in saying that a couple of folk from their store have called in sick and could we send someone along to help out. Our manager sends along Andy.
    As we're shutting up shop my mate and I get an SMS from Andy which reads "Emma just dropped her number into my pocket as I left..."
    My friend replies "Call her. Do her."
    And he does. ("Hey this is Andy, how's it going?" "Pretty good, just lying here naked touching myself while I think about you")

    They get together a couple of times. Literally just for sex. She comes round, they fuck, she leaves. Ideal siuation for them both apparently. Then she starts to text him and call him more and more often. She comes into work to see him. We're all getting a kick out of this, Andy decides to break it off sooner rather than later. Good choice, well done Andy.

    But she doesn't consider it to be over. The texts and calls continue, he would get roughly 70-100 a day from this girl while he never replied to a single one. Eventually he finally sends her a text reading "Emma, stop it. I've told you I'm not interested." and she stops...for about an hour.

    He said that on a couple of occasions, she had called him at about 6am and had the following conversation.
    "What you doin'?"
    "I was sleeping"
    "Can I come round?"
    "No, I'm going back to bed"
    "Don't worry I'll just lie down naked next to you, you won't even know I'm there"
    "Bye, Emma" *click*

    Then she tries to get to him through me...

    Eventually she stops with Andy and after about a month I get a MSN add request. It's her. We're chatting, I ask what's up? she says "I'm over Andy"
    "Oh, great!"
    "But I can't stop thinking about you"
    "...Riiiight..."
    "Do you want to go to the cinema or something?"
    (I decide I can play this off nicely) "To see what?"
    "Doesn't matter, I just want to fuck you in the cinema"
    (BALLS!) "Emmm I'm going to be busy this week. Maybe next week but no promises"
    "I'll let you do me anal"
    "Gotta go!"

    Then she sends me an email telling me she's not over Andy, she barely stops thinking about him. Then proceeds to go off on a crazy rant about how he's such a dick and how he left her stranded outside of town in the rain after he made her bleed "because he was too big for her" (inverted commas because I don't know if that claim has any basis)
    This rant is well over 5 paragraphs of hatred. I've just finished readng it and I'm trying to work out what the hell is going on when I notice there's a follow-up email which reads, and i quote

    "Lovely penis though. Nice curve to it."

    Now, I nearly wet myself laughing at that sudden change of character. As did all of my work colleagues, including Andy. It's now a running joke with us that when you get really annoyed at anybody for anything you follow it up with "Lovely penis though!"

    Edit: She's still crazy and still after him

    I'm not known for making excellent decisions but I mean free anal and a movie seems like a good deal to me.


    This should probably be in a signature.

    Not mine though.

    Lord knows I wouldn't have turned down that offer. And then the cycle would continue....

    Nocren on
    newSig.jpg
  • Bionic MonkeyBionic Monkey Registered User, ClubPA
    edited August 2009
    I dated a pathological liar. I eventually found out that pretty much all the basic facts about her life as I knew them were false. It took a while, because the stuff she would lie about was stuff you don't normally question, and it was really hard to check facts, and some of it was true. I still have no idea what sort of person she actually was, it's sort of bizarre.

    My sister dated one of these her junior year of high school. He told her his family was British and that he was born in London and moved to Utah when he was three and that he was a dancer (my sister danced) and that he was an active Mormon with the kind of aspirations young Mormon lads have (my family's Mormon, me not so much).

    Jesus Christ, it's like you're describing my first girlfriend. Let's see if I can recall all the lies she told me:

    -Said she was 19, when she was actually 18.
    -Said she went to boarding school in England as a kid.
    -Said her family owned a vineyard in Italy.
    -Said she had 4 middle names (damned if I can remember all of them).
    -Said she was a virgin.
    -Said she had two kids with a previous boyfriend years ago that had since died in a car accident.
    -Said she was going to a psychiatrist.
    -Said she was posing naked for some artist at her work to make me jealous.
    -Said her real father was some semi-famous wrestler on the Portland circuit.
    -Said she was pregnant during one of our on/off breakups, but it was a tubal ligation, so she'd had an abortion.


    And this is just the stuff I still remember after breaking up nearly a decade ago.

    Bionic Monkey on
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  • RubberACRubberAC Sidney BC!Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    Alyce it is really awesome to see you are able to understand your relationship wasn't a good one
    so glad you're not all hung up over him (ha)
    If I had an Alyce doodle every day i would probably be mad too because it would make me feel like the worst doodle drawer ever in comparison

    RubberAC on
  • AlyceInWonderlandAlyceInWonderland Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    SAW776 wrote: »
    chasm wrote: »
    I'm not known for making excellent decisions but I mean free anal and a movie seems like a good deal to me.

    Till she disembowels you in your sleep.


    Your fatal mistake was sleeping.

    420, anal erryday?

    Also, I'd feel like I was taking advantage of Alyce if I was like, "Yo Alyce, I know your life is bad right now, so you should send me an adorable ninja penguin thingy for free."
    I'd also like some photos of said thingies

    I intend to pay her. Lord knows the poor girl has enough problems what with lacking porn star tits and giving gifts to people she's dating.

    Oh the things we could get her to make though. We could put her through college. Who needs to strip when you can sew stuffed animals for nerds? :lol:

    Haha, I really don't mind doing them for free. It's fun, and I like doing things to make people happy :P Who knows, I may even give them little accessories, like nun chucks and ninja stars. That would be kind of awesome, I think.

    AlyceInWonderland on
  • Raybies666Raybies666 Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    SAW776 wrote: »
    Honestly, a girl who gives daily blowjobs and sews tiny stuffed ninjas? Your standards should be pretty fucking high. :P

    Yeah? And I'd also draw him up silly little doodles on a daily basis. He never really laughed or appreciated them.

    Example of said doodle:
    doodle484.jpg

    Sigh.

    I can't see the doodle but I'll assume its cool because you sound lovely.

    EDIT:and now I can see it hours later. That's sweet.

    Raybies666 on
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  • TamTam Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    2. I went off to college, and my parents said it was okay for him to hang around the house (he had a falling out with his mother. To be fair, she was a raging bitch.) So, he was allowed to come and go whenever he pleased, eat whatever he liked... basically because my parents saw that this guy needed a roof over his head with stable people around him.. and cause they're wonderful, caring people.
    Well, while I was at my dorm, I get a call from my mom, and she is distraught. She told me that she told Nix to put a food package in the garbage, and not the recycling because it had food things on it, and the recycling people said to just throw that stuff out... and apparently Nix FLIPPED the fuck out. Telling her that she told him to recycle everything plastic, and that she was contradicting her self.... he was yelling at her so badly that he made her cry.

    If someone I put trust in made my mom cry for a reason like this I'd take a tire iron to his face. I am so incredibly furious right now, fuck.

    who the fuck does that

    fucking shit-munching pissant savage

    Tam on
  • Salvation122Salvation122 Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    Xtarath wrote: »
    My buddy from back home got himself a bit of a stalker once.
    (this is a long'un)
    Must have been about a year and a half ago now? Maybe more?
    She walked into the Game store where I worked and I went over to do my salesperson spiel ("What is it you're looking for? Who are you buying for? WHY NOT GET A PS3?!") she said she just came in to see if there were any hot guys working here but she supposes not (ego = bruised) and I say "well, you'll probably like Andy, he's your typical pretty boy but he's not working today"
    She tells me that she's going to be working in the Game store in the shopping centre at the other end of the street our store is on and heads off.

    There's nothing for a couple of weeks and then we get a call in saying that a couple of folk from their store have called in sick and could we send someone along to help out. Our manager sends along Andy.
    As we're shutting up shop my mate and I get an SMS from Andy which reads "Emma just dropped her number into my pocket as I left..."
    My friend replies "Call her. Do her."
    And he does. ("Hey this is Andy, how's it going?" "Pretty good, just lying here naked touching myself while I think about you")

    They get together a couple of times. Literally just for sex. She comes round, they fuck, she leaves. Ideal siuation for them both apparently. Then she starts to text him and call him more and more often. She comes into work to see him. We're all getting a kick out of this, Andy decides to break it off sooner rather than later. Good choice, well done Andy.

    But she doesn't consider it to be over. The texts and calls continue, he would get roughly 70-100 a day from this girl while he never replied to a single one. Eventually he finally sends her a text reading "Emma, stop it. I've told you I'm not interested." and she stops...for about an hour.

    He said that on a couple of occasions, she had called him at about 6am and had the following conversation.
    "What you doin'?"
    "I was sleeping"
    "Can I come round?"
    "No, I'm going back to bed"
    "Don't worry I'll just lie down naked next to you, you won't even know I'm there"
    "Bye, Emma" *click*

    Then she tries to get to him through me...

    Eventually she stops with Andy and after about a month I get a MSN add request. It's her. We're chatting, I ask what's up? she says "I'm over Andy"
    "Oh, great!"
    "But I can't stop thinking about you"
    "...Riiiight..."
    "Do you want to go to the cinema or something?"
    (I decide I can play this off nicely) "To see what?"
    "Doesn't matter, I just want to fuck you in the cinema"
    (BALLS!) "Emmm I'm going to be busy this week. Maybe next week but no promises"
    "I'll let you do me anal"
    "Gotta go!"

    Then she sends me an email telling me she's not over Andy, she barely stops thinking about him. Then proceeds to go off on a crazy rant about how he's such a dick and how he left her stranded outside of town in the rain after he made her bleed "because he was too big for her" (inverted commas because I don't know if that claim has any basis)
    This rant is well over 5 paragraphs of hatred. I've just finished readng it and I'm trying to work out what the hell is going on when I notice there's a follow-up email which reads, and i quote

    "Lovely penis though. Nice curve to it."

    Now, I nearly wet myself laughing at that sudden change of character. As did all of my work colleagues, including Andy. It's now a running joke with us that when you get really annoyed at anybody for anything you follow it up with "Lovely penis though!"

    Edit: She's still crazy and still after him

    I'm not known for making excellent decisions but I mean free anal and a movie seems like a good deal to me.


    This should probably be in a signature.

    Not mine though.

    It's going in the rotation.

    Salvation122 on
  • webguy20webguy20 I spend too much time on the Internet Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    After reading all these I feel incredibly normal. Kind of like how I used to feel after listening to loveline on the radio. I've had my share of weird people I've dated or went on dates with but it pales in comparison to what you all post. I will say though that I've developed a good sense of when someone is being overly needy/clingy. I've also developed the ability to tell when I'm that overly needy/clingy guy and try not to date during those times.

    webguy20 on
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  • SylverlokkSylverlokk Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    syndalis wrote: »
    My story is pretty fucked up... haven't seen one that beats this level of crazy yet...

    I started looking at all manners of religion in my late teens and early 20s, having completely discarded Catholocism. I checked out Buddhism, Islam, Shinto, other flavors of Christianity, Voodoo.... you name it, I went there. I even read LaVey's writings (Satanic Bible) out of curiosity, since I had basically thrown everything out the window.

    It was a few years after my initial looking around that I ran into a girl at a V:tM LARP (yeah yeah, laugh at me all you want) I was playing at the time. We will call her D. D was very new-agey, open to all kinds of things (which definitely piqued my current interests at the time)... and we hit it off immediately. Thus, through her, i ran into Tantra, Reiki, Crystal bullshit, Alien/UFO nutjobs, and native american spirituality. It was (what felt like) a fun, monogamous, and deep relationship. I had thanksgiving with her out of state family, for the love of god...

    On our two year anniversary, I learned something pretty significant.

    She was with somebody else.

    Not just *with* somebody else, but she was a servant to that somebody else. As in Master/Slave, for the whole time I had been in the relationship. Not just a *slave* to somebody else, but a full-out submissive sex slave (something that didn't match her bedroom antics AT ALL). And the final bing cherry on this sundae of bullshit? She was convinced that particular someone else was an alien from another planet.

    So, you see this is the deal. this guy (Ken was his name... though he had another name like gleepdoglurp or something to that effect), managed to buffalo a group of women, aged 18-35, into believing he was an alien who possesed the body of poor ken, and was using him as a vessel to impart mysteries of the universe to them. these women were all given a choice. Many years of hard study, meditation, and prayer to reach a level at which they could ascend from the planet.... or a few years of good deep dicking. they apparently all chose the latter. This sex cult of his ALSO mowed his lawn, cleaned his house, and paid his bills, as he "didn't understand the world that he has been placed on." So, they would rotate shifts of time with him... go to his house for an after noon or an evening... sometimes the whole group would show up, smoke pot, and have an orgy. I knew none of this because it fell in line with all of her other new-age activities that she would go to one of the friends' houses and do their thing. But needless to say, that dude is the worlds greatest scam artist, and he has been riding my now ex-girlfriend for all it was worth. The relationship ended on the spot.

    That same weekend, I drove my truck into a ditch, fucked it up, and lost my job. [/country song]. Bad week.

    Well as an ambassador to this alien species you should have taken the time to introduce Ken Gloodpdagleep to the Earth custom of "getting his ass kicked" for being a douche.

    Sylverlokk on
  • RubberACRubberAC Sidney BC!Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    Tam wrote: »
    2. I went off to college, and my parents said it was okay for him to hang around the house (he had a falling out with his mother. To be fair, she was a raging bitch.) So, he was allowed to come and go whenever he pleased, eat whatever he liked... basically because my parents saw that this guy needed a roof over his head with stable people around him.. and cause they're wonderful, caring people.
    Well, while I was at my dorm, I get a call from my mom, and she is distraught. She told me that she told Nix to put a food package in the garbage, and not the recycling because it had food things on it, and the recycling people said to just throw that stuff out... and apparently Nix FLIPPED the fuck out. Telling her that she told him to recycle everything plastic, and that she was contradicting her self.... he was yelling at her so badly that he made her cry.

    If someone I put trust in made my mom cry for a reason like this I'd take a tire iron to his face. I am so incredibly furious right now, fuck.

    who the fuck does that

    fucking shit-munching pissant savage

    YOU STILL HAVE THE CHANCE TAM
    TIME TO MAKE THE WORLD A BETTER PLACE

    RubberAC on
  • TamTam Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    RubberAC wrote: »
    Tam wrote: »
    2. I went off to college, and my parents said it was okay for him to hang around the house (he had a falling out with his mother. To be fair, she was a raging bitch.) So, he was allowed to come and go whenever he pleased, eat whatever he liked... basically because my parents saw that this guy needed a roof over his head with stable people around him.. and cause they're wonderful, caring people.
    Well, while I was at my dorm, I get a call from my mom, and she is distraught. She told me that she told Nix to put a food package in the garbage, and not the recycling because it had food things on it, and the recycling people said to just throw that stuff out... and apparently Nix FLIPPED the fuck out. Telling her that she told him to recycle everything plastic, and that she was contradicting her self.... he was yelling at her so badly that he made her cry.

    If someone I put trust in made my mom cry for a reason like this I'd take a tire iron to his face. I am so incredibly furious right now, fuck.

    who the fuck does that

    fucking shit-munching pissant savage

    YOU STILL HAVE THE CHANCE TAM
    TIME TO MAKE THE WORLD A BETTER PLACE

    Just need to find my tire iron

    Tam on
  • OptimusZedOptimusZed Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    Tam wrote: »
    2. I went off to college, and my parents said it was okay for him to hang around the house (he had a falling out with his mother. To be fair, she was a raging bitch.) So, he was allowed to come and go whenever he pleased, eat whatever he liked... basically because my parents saw that this guy needed a roof over his head with stable people around him.. and cause they're wonderful, caring people.
    Well, while I was at my dorm, I get a call from my mom, and she is distraught. She told me that she told Nix to put a food package in the garbage, and not the recycling because it had food things on it, and the recycling people said to just throw that stuff out... and apparently Nix FLIPPED the fuck out. Telling her that she told him to recycle everything plastic, and that she was contradicting her self.... he was yelling at her so badly that he made her cry.

    If someone I put trust in made my mom cry for a reason like this I'd take a tire iron to his face. I am so incredibly furious right now, fuck.

    who the fuck does that

    fucking shit-munching pissant savage
    It's a pretty fucked up thing to do. I guess it didn't really register on my outrage meter because you try that shit with MY mom and she'll deck you. Then she'll throw your stuff on the lawn and light it on fire.

    OptimusZed on
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  • chasmchasm Ill-tempered Texan Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    So would my biological mom, but that's because she's certifiable. Wait, scratch that. She'd deck him, then throw him on the lawn and set him on fire.

    chasm on
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  • AlyceInWonderlandAlyceInWonderland Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    Yeah... I'm actually really ashamed that I didn't do anything about that. ...like.... really ashamed. It was fucking horrible. My mom is the nicest lady, she didn't deserve that!

    AlyceInWonderland on
  • webguy20webguy20 I spend too much time on the Internet Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    Yeah... I'm actually really ashamed that I didn't do anything about that. ...like.... really ashamed. It was fucking horrible. My mom is the nicest lady, she didn't deserve that!

    Well you've done something about it now. So kudos to you. Won't have to worry about it happening again.

    webguy20 on
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  • AbdhyiusAbdhyius Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    My crazy girlfriend story is how I met a wonderful girl at this camp and we turned into a disgustingly cute couple almost instantly, always holding hands, or embracing, always kissing each other, never being more than five feet away from each other for more than an hour at a time, and I was so madly in love with her and so intensely happy and then she dumped me.

    GREAT STORY, RIGHT

    Also, I would have put crushed glass in the food of any guy who treated a friend of mine the way your ex treated you alyce.

    Yeah I bet you wish you weren't a horrible person now that you're bleeding out youe asshole from ten thousand cuts in your shredded intestines, asshole.

    Abdhyius on
    ftOqU21.png
  • MeizMeiz Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    I have 3 people in mind for this:

    1 . My first girlfriend thought she could talk to the dead and would even channel one of these personalities.

    2. One woman I slept with thought yanking my nuttsack really sharply would be pleasurable.

    3. One girl I dated proceeded to tell me on her first date that her ex boyfriend was a heroine addict and currently serving time in jail.

    In all 3 cases, I got the fuck out.

    Meiz on
  • RocketSauceRocketSauce Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    Abdhyius wrote: »
    Also, I would have put crushed glass in the food of any guy who treated a friend of mine the way your ex treated you alyce.

    Yeah I bet you wish you weren't a horrible person now that you're bleeding out youe asshole from ten thousand cuts in your shredded intestines, asshole.

    This is the equivalent of screaming GUILTY! and wanting to put a dude in the electric chair after you've heard the prosecution's opening arguments.

    RocketSauce on
  • AbdhyiusAbdhyius Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    Did you punch her in the hoohaa and say "was it good for you too" as revenge

    EDIT: Also yeah what of it rocketsauce. He obviously did it.

    EDIT the second: I have never actually killed someone neither attempted to do so, and no-one has cause for concern if I prepare a meal for them.

    Abdhyius on
    ftOqU21.png
  • AlyceInWonderlandAlyceInWonderland Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    I don't think I'd wish any ill will on the guy. He was a shitty boyfriend, but he's a pretty good guy to his friends.
    I just hope he learns to treat his next girlfriend better.

    AlyceInWonderland on
  • cooljammer00cooljammer00 Hey Small Christmas-Man!Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    I dunno, what do 16 year old girls like?

    Cause I'll be damned if I knew when I was 16.

    cooljammer00 on
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  • GonmunGonmun He keeps kickin' me in the dickRegistered User regular
    edited August 2009
    I dunno, what do 16 year old girls like?

    Cause I'll be damned if I knew when I was 16.

    I hope she likes random yelling and the occasional push if she ever wants to switch places by the sounds of it.

    I think the point that Abdhyius is trying to make is that it's sad that someone as obviously nice as Alyce should have had to go through the rough time she did and that it's frustrating to hear about it all. But as stated earlier she's getting herself into a better state now and hell she's making people ninja penguins. What is not to love about that?!

    Gonmun on
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  • Masked_MulletMasked_Mullet Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    Oh I just remembered tons of crazy shit my ex used to tell me.

    1. She used to tell me that she was a medium, and could talk to the dead.

    2. Her ex was a sociopath and psychopath an that he has served jail time on assault and murder charges.

    3. She used to be apart of an underground chop shop, and also she was hunted by "kings" for death.

    4. She was once kidnapped and used as a slave for over a month and a half without having anyone else knowing about it.

    5. One of the reasons why we broke up is because I wouldn't hold her hand, or be effectionate around her grandparents, such as kissing her infront of them, and being a cute an cuddly...an that crap.

    and that's all i got now.

    Masked_Mullet on
  • cooljammer00cooljammer00 Hey Small Christmas-Man!Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    Hmm, wouldn't that be the equivalent of that guy who didn't want to be jacked off in the park next to kids?

    Just courtesy, really. Maybe she got off on doing shit with people to catch her or disapprove nearby.

    cooljammer00 on
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  • King RiptorKing Riptor Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    I dunno, what do 16 year old girls like?

    Cause I'll be damned if I knew when I was 16.

    Kittens and Bubblegum.

    I think.

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  • RocketSauceRocketSauce Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    Abdhyius wrote: »
    EDIT: Also yeah what of it rocketsauce. He obviously did it.

    I dunno, I usually like to get the other person's side of the story before I go around wishing for anuses to be shredded.

    RocketSauce on
  • AbdhyiusAbdhyius Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    My point was, that if I noticed someone treating a friend of mine the way Alyce says her ex did, I'd do something about it. Depending on mood this could be shouting or poisoning.

    Abdhyius on
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  • ProPatriaMoriProPatriaMori Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    Five years from now, a story in one of these threads will include "and her crazy fucking friends tried to kill me by hiding glass in my peanut butter and jelly sandwiches."

    Crazy+crazy!=justice. Crazy+crazy=more crazy.

    ProPatriaMori on
  • RocketSauceRocketSauce Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    Abdhyius wrote: »
    My point was, that if I noticed someone treating a friend of mine the way Alyce says her ex did, I'd do something about it.

    Like tell that person not to be a doormat?

    RocketSauce on
  • AbdhyiusAbdhyius Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    crazy awesome

    okay i promise not to poison anyone

    i do reserve the right to get mighty riled up tho

    Abdhyius on
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  • ShivahnShivahn Unaware of her barrel shifter privilege Western coastal temptressRegistered User, Moderator mod
    edited August 2009
    Five years from now, a story in one of these threads will include "and her crazy fucking friends tried to kill me by hiding glass in my peanut butter and jelly sandwiches."

    Crazy+crazy!=justice. Crazy+crazy=more crazy.

    Since I'm enjoying the stories so much, let me point out that the second equation is not necessarily undesirable.

    More crazy!
    Abdhyius wrote: »
    crazy awesome

    okay i promise not to poison anyone

    i do reserve the right to get mighty riled up tho

    Most people wouldn't consider glass a poison...:winky:

    Though you probably shouldn't feed people glass. I like to limit the use of these guys: o_O D: as much as possible.

    Shivahn on
  • RocketSauceRocketSauce Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    Abdhyius wrote: »

    i do reserve the right to get mighty riled up tho

    Sure, but you also have to remember that anyone who's been in a relationship long enough can be made to look like an asshole/bitch if you just mention the bad stuff.

    RocketSauce on
  • X Pr3dat0R XX Pr3dat0R X Registered User
    edited August 2009
    I dunno, what do 16 year old girls like?

    Cause I'll be damned if I knew when I was 16.

    and ninja-penguins...

    ninguins!

    X Pr3dat0R X on
  • STATE OF THE ART ROBOTSTATE OF THE ART ROBOT Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    I was just an observer for this one but this story ends badly for my once-friend.

    Let me start off by saying that my friend is no catch. He is overweight and very socially awkward, had a dead-end job for a while and is a slob. That being said, he is my friend so I am sad that this crazy woman has basically enslaved my friend. He met a girl who is an absolute bitch. She convinced him to move in with him after 3 months, they got engaged in another 4 months and were married after just over a year after knowing each other. During this time frame she:

    -Made him cut off all contact with his family (with whom he was very close with before)
    -Made him get rid of all his comics, game systems, etc. which he enjoyed immensley
    -(bolding now for craziness) Made him join the marines to pay for her lifestyle. Made him join a military organization to pay for her own shit.
    -Moved to a town where she has had two former boyfriends and I suspect she is cheating on him regular
    -He has a kid with her
    -She SCREAMED at us when we told him he had to slow shit down and think about this by himself. We tried to get him alone for a night to try to talk some sense with him. Yes we wanted to sabotage this relationship because it is not healthy for him

    The ONLY good thing about this is that he has lost so much weight due to being in the marines that maybe he will grow a spine and leave her, even though she would make out like a bandit.

    i wish I could call him my friend but man I cannot do anything with him while that evil succubus is around.

    STATE OF THE ART ROBOT on
  • TubularLuggageTubularLuggage Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    One of my exes back in high school was pretty crazy, but only really when a phone was involved.
    She'd tell me to call her all the time, and would always give a general time (this evening, when you get off work, etc). Oh, and she used the very common 'upper hand' tactic of pretty much never being the one to call.

    Here's the thing; If I ever didn't call, she would get mad, but if I did call, she'd say I was calling too often. For the record, I didn't call her that much to begin with (certainly not excessively), and pretty soon it was literally only when she had specifically told me to.
    I asked her about it in person, and of course in person she didn't act crazy. She apologized (even though I really hadn't brought it up in any sort of accusational way), but it continued. I found it baffling, mainly because aside from her phone-related issues, things were going great.

    Ironically, one of the very few times she ever initiated a call was the day after I broke up with her, trying to work things out.

    I know it's pretty tame by this thread's standards, but it was irritating as fuck at the time.

    TubularLuggage on
  • Radikal_DreamerRadikal_Dreamer Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    My crazy girlfriends:

    1st girlfriend, Dated for nearly 3 years - This girl had her nude pictures on a geocities page on the internet before I dated her (we were 15 at the time). She also had a nasty habbit of carving names into her own body... mainly my name. Also, she loved to guilt trip me into driving over to her house (when I turned 16 obviously) no matter the weather. I swear I went through some of the worst ice storms of my life just to spend literally 45 minutes with her. Damn near hit a tree one time.


    2nd girlfriend, dated for exactly 1 year - She claimed to have multiple personalities the whole time I dated her. Every time she brought up that subject I just kind of laughed and forgot about it, but now I can totally see her differing personalities (I never got to know any personality names or anything, though). She was also schizophrenic and hallucinated. She told me that her psychologist basically told her at any point she could wake up and just not be there anymore. One time she had a total psychological breakdown while also hallucinating. I always say I'm really no good when a girl is crying and just don't know what to do. Well, I really fucking have no idea what to do when they're crying and seeing disembodied heads floating about the room.

    She was also probably the least sexual being on earth. She quite honestly did not get sex jokes or really anything involving that. That was probably partially because she was uber religious (and in fact later changed her major from teaching to deaconness...). But even most of the uber religious people I met at that same college knew what the hell I was talking about when I cracked a joke. She really had no clue.

    Leading off of that, she obviously wouldn't have sex before marriage. But we did make out. After the first night where I got up her shirt, she freaked out and backed things way up. No biggie, we'd get there again I thought. And sure we got there again, but further than that was hilarious. She would only give me a handjob through a sock. One night after a ton of convincing she was going to try it without the sock and after one touch pulled her hand back and said she wasn't ready. So back went the sock!

    Girlfriend 3, dated for 2 weeks - Totally not crazy compared to 2, but still had her odd quirks. Her problems were completely opposite of 2's, actually. This one was younger (just turned 18 and a senior in high school at the time, where as the last one was slightly older than me at 20.) Anyway, she had been sleeping with muuuuuuch older men since she was younger. She went way up in the 30s, too. But, she never ever ever orgasmed (basically said she couldn't and never did). She really only loved sex for the power it gave her.

    Girlfriend 4, dated for also about 2 weeks - Not too crazy, though she broke up with me so she could go into alcohol rehab. I also just thought she was crazy because she got her nipples pierced purely on a dare.

    And girlfriend 5 is my current and is totally not crazy at all.

    Radikal_Dreamer on
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  • RocketSauceRocketSauce Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    How many pairs of socks did you go through?

    RocketSauce on
  • Radikal_DreamerRadikal_Dreamer Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    How many pairs of socks did you go through?

    Sadly, not very many :cry:

    Radikal_Dreamer on
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