["Game" On] Dawn of War II: Last Stand & 1.8 out on the 14th

Akira

IN THE GRIM DARKNESS OF THE FAR FUTURE, THERE IS ONLY MELEE BLOBS

Welcome to Dawn of War II patch 1.5, aka "melee was stronger than ranged so we decided to buff melee damage". To help you, the frothing morons who both read and, sadly, post in this thread, I have created a handy index for how overpowered the various races are, using my revolutionary new technology, the OPness meter;

with blue representing the underpowered side, and red the overpowered. SM and Tyranid icons have been added to further simplify things.

Once again in order of most overpowered to least overpowered. Yeah I'm reusing the blingee portraits, go fuck yourself.

Kill Yourself

Also commonly known as "Fuckyouanids", "A blind retarded child could win as this", and "1st choice of pedophiles"

Coming in at a clean "Go fuck the Devil in Hell" rank, Tyranids lead the pack in stupid bullshit that proves Relic couldn't balance their way out of a scale. With such stunning units as AG Gaunts, able to outrun retreating units, and the Hive Tyrant able to completely circumvent the risks of Synapse, Tyranids are truly the choice of those who prefer winning despite their monitor not even being on.

PRO STRAT BY AKIRA: pick a bunch of units and then attack-move until you wipe out your fleeing enemy

I would make fun of them being attack-move but that is 3/4 of all races now

Also commonly known as "Stupid fucking [ork unit or hero] bullshit", "Nerf Tankbustas" and "That race that was strong in T1 and then Relic made T1 like 10 minutes long without nerfing them, god you are so dumb Relic"

Coming in just behind Tyranids and a little short of the coveted "Go fuck the Devil in Hell" rank, Orks are despite that still ridiculously overpowered and easy to use. However unlike Tyranids, you have to occasionally press W in addition to attack-moving, making them require almost twice the Actions per Minute (APM) of Tyranids (2APM vs 1APM). A good choice for Tyranids looking for a challenge.

PRO STRAT BY AKIRA: pick a bunch of units, press W and then attack-move until you wipe out your fleeing enemy

Stupid Elf Losers

Also commonly known as "Nerf Banshees", "Nerf Banshees" and "Nerf Banshees"



Who the fuck cares

PRO STRAT BY AKIRA: build a bunch of banshees and then attack-move until you wipe out your fleeing enemy




Adeptus Astartes, Superhuman Warriors of the Imperium of Man, The God Emperor's Space Marines

Also commonly known as "For fucks sake you actually nerfed SM in 1.5 Relic what the hell is wrong with you", "That race that used to be good" and "Masochists only"

Easily the most underpowered race, SM are firmly in the "Why would you even use it?" category. With a T1 that requires heavy power investment just to counter basic enemy units, and the only melee unit being both the worst in the game and the most expensive, SM have no chance to compete in the horrifying world of 1.5 melee blobs. Do not play unless you enjoy hating yourself more and more each passing day.

PRO STRAT BY AKIRA: invest all your power into T1 so you can at least have a chance against other race's 0-power melee units, and then get out-teched because they actually have power left for T2. JOKE ANSWER BUILD HEAVY BOLTER DEVASTATORS HAW HAW HAW




And here's a list of GFWL tags I have no intention of keeping updated

Nerd Forumer Name= Stupid GFWL Tag

Internet Superstars are in red

Akira = MechaAkira

3clipse= R3clipse
815165 = thee telescopes
A-Puck = Za Puck
Accualt = The Accualt
admanb = admanjb
Aegeri= Aegeri
Battle Jesus = Aarnog (what the fuck why is this nothing like your name, jesus)
biscuitbutt81 = biscuitbutt81
BlueDestiny = BlueDouble
bongi = bongitrs
cakemikz = ryantschutter (can't fucking send it to me with forumer/gfwl or just gfwl like a normal person, so Ryan I hope someone castrates you.)
Captain K = I Am Captain K
Canada_jezus = Canada Jezus
CanisAquilus = Canis Aquilus
ChubbyRaccoon = Juice Tinn
Computer Generated Faggotry = CasinoGhost
Core= defconcore
Critter = TrotskysIcepick
Cronus = MasterCronus
Custom Special/F4ll0ut = customRUB
darksteel=Cokesakto
darunia106=darunia106
Defunker = JollyGreenJssus
Demiurge = Demiurge03
Dissociater= Dissociater
Dr.Oblivious = DrOblivious
Enosh20 = Enosh20
Figgy = FigmentNS
Fizban140 = Fizban140 (?)
Foefaller = FoefallerMagus
Hawk= Hawk xSx
jdarksun= jdarksun
Jebu= Chrethon
Jives = JilesFTW
Joril = Cordiss
Just_Bri_Thanks = BrianJ012
kaliyama = marblesthechimp
Kami = KamiDaHobo
Kinderparty = Kinderparty
kildy = Kildy
Kivutar = Morgant M
Klyka = Klyka
Kruite = Bluflare
Leitner= Colonel Leitner
Lord_Asmodeus= I3rigand
Lurk = Saltek
MagicPrime = FireSideWizard (an ungrateful cunt for not saying "please" add me)
Medan = CaptDearborn
mightyspacepope= mightyspacepope
Moridin889 = LazyGit889
NebulousQ = NebulousQ
ObstSkwerl = Pvtskwerl
Pyromaniac221 = Pyromaniac221
Sepah = Seppah (heh, he can't spell, what a tard).
Shade = Cannoncore
Shamus= El Shamus
Shorn Scrotum Man= SojakFA
Shujaa = ShenanigansUK
SJ= Warboss SJ
SniperGuy = SniperGuy710
Sonar = sonarogre
Quid = Asmadeus
Sidarthur = Eff O Eff (FoF? Fleet of Foot? Eldar scum.)
Spindrift = Cudboat
TekDragon= TekDragon84
TheBog = TheBog2
TheCrumblyCracker = CrumblyCracker
TheGerbil = TheGerbil86
The_Scarab = SomeBug
troublebrewing = TroubleBrewin
Traikan = Traikan
TychoCelchuuu = TychoCelchuu
urahonky = IMAPWNJ00 (wins award for name most likely used by a pedophile)
Urian = Fathom216
valtzy = valtzy
Varega = Varega (likes to be called "Vagina Man" because he's a big vagina)
Velmeran = Vechloran
Vi Monks= ViMonks2
Woggle = Woggle 0
Wulf= Wulf
Zen Vulgarity= ZenVulgarity (probably the worst poster/player on the forums)

If you have no friends but want to play DoW2 that badly, then get in vent and we will awkwardly ignore you because your microphone is too loud or you have an annoying voice or I hate you from the forums.

Special shoutout to Task3r, may you fuck yourself to death until the end of time.

Pancake

This is a much better OP than the last one.

Kazhiim

impressive, most impressive

but you are not a jedi yet *PSHEWWW* dun dun dun dun dundun dun dundun

anybody else have that bank?

Retzinsky

I rushed the last thread with Banshees using Fleet of Foot and Swift Movement. It was cut down during retreat.

DodgeBlan

OP is OP compared to the other new OP, but is nerfed compared to old OPs

Vic_Hazard

Yeah Goomba, lictor alpha has a super infiltrate that works differently than any other infiltrate in the game. I guess it's there so he can use his infiltrate-melee specials, but it's completely crazy. Space marines needs to have a scout with a sarge and infiltrate to stand a chance, if he only has the sarge, he'll simply just flesh hook him.

It's annoying when your counter to things get countered by the stuff it's supposed to counter.

Edit: How do i go about on getting on that GFWL-list by the way? My tag is RonnyBaeverbane

DudBolt

I remember playing against a Tyranid AG spammer. He lost because instead of having 6 AG horms he had 5 and one termagaunt squad. A rookie mistake.

Goomba

Vic_Hazard wrote: »

It's annoying when your counter to things get countered by the stuff it's supposed to counter.

I, too, hate playing against Tyranids.

Bethryn

Loss of control bugs are still going strong.

Pancake

Bethryn wrote: »

Loss of control bugs are still going strong.

No, they fixed those like two patches ago.

Medan

This thread just feels like home... snarky and full of awesome jackassery.

Akira

This OP was written at 4am.

admanb

So there's still no good reason to play this game?

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

I beg you Relic, just revert back to 1.0 with all the bug fixes. I'll fight OP banshees in exchange for having to keep my eyes open to play as 'nids.

subedii

admanb wrote: »

So there's still no good reason to play this game?

Well the co-op campaign's still pretty awesome.

And hey, if you play Tyranids, then it pretty much just becomes a time attack game instead. Let's see if we can beat our last score of 2 minutes 14!

Goomba

I prefer to see how many entire squads I can lose and still win.

Win by over 400 tickets.

Bethryn

Akira wrote: »

This OP was written at 4am.

Around the same time Relic does their balancing?

Goomba

4am is a real time, Bethryn 8-).

Alegis

Pancake wrote: »

Bethryn wrote: »

Loss of control bugs are still going strong.

No, they fixed those like two patches ago.

Well, there is (still) the problem with knockback (from which especially FC benefits).

Say you cast immolate or time field, but get attacked by a force commander while casting. You can't retreat because it's placed 'in a queue' after immolate - which will never cast as long as you are being knocked back during casting - and thus lose control and will die.

And should your commander get revived they will cast the spell. Only 5 minutes too late. Hurray!

Faffel

DoW2 reminds me of World of Warcraft. A bunch of people who claim to hate the game but play it all the time regardless, while whining at every opportunity.

Gammarah

I strongly approve of this op.

Goomba

Faffel wrote: »

DoW2 reminds me of World of Warcraft. A bunch of people who claim to hate the game but play it all the time regardless, while whining at every opportunity.

I know of at least two people that complain about it while not playing it, in addition to all of the people that tried te beta and didn't buy it because they went all retarded on the balance.

Tarranon

Faffel wrote: »

DoW2 reminds me of World of Warcraft. A bunch of people who claim to hate the game but play it all the time regardless, while whining at every opportunity.

8-)

subedii

Faffel wrote: »

DoW2 reminds me of World of Warcraft. A bunch of people who claim to hate the game but play it all the time regardless, while whining at every opportunity.

You don't understand Faffel, and hey, more power to you.

It's simple, we really do love this game. For me personally this is the first RTS I've ever really been able to get into the online gameplay. It's brilliant.

But it's also horribly, horribly broken, and it's broken in subtle ways, but also broken in the most obvious ways imaginable.

Relic issued the mega-patch for a reason, because they recognised the online game was deeply flawed in a number of ways. The problem is that their understanding of the problems really does seem to have been shallow, and in fixing what they thought were the issues, they've just brought up new ones and tweaked the Overpowered status of some strategies and races. There were one or two weeks after the mega-patch where this was fine because not everyone knew about these problems, but by this stage, everyone does.

This should be an amazing game to play, but it's not because of some really questionable design decisions and balance problems.

But no you're right, it's just a bunch of whiners who don't know how to think for themselves and strategise like "real" players do.

As for playing it all the time, I did play it all the time. Right now though, I'm not. Because online is a mess, and it's frustrating to try. I was a Space Marine player before the recent patch. Tac blobs were blatantly overpowered, but Relic mistook that for meaning the entire race was overpowered, and didn't really understand that things like Tac blobs were actually papering over other issues that SM's had as a playable side. Now we've got a brand new schematic where T1 is extended, and an extreme emphasis on "melee beats ranged" thinking. Tell me, when you've got a race with NO viable T1 melee units, how do you think that plays out? Scout shotguns and Devastators are supposed to be the counter but they're not, because the knockback blast doesn't do any damage and platforms are incredibly easy to counter. So T1 is basically non-existant for Space Marines if they come up against any melee. Which is the other three races.

Winnie The Pooh

Alegis wrote: »

Pancake wrote: »

Bethryn wrote: »

Loss of control bugs are still going strong.

No, they fixed those like two patches ago.

Well, there is (still) the problem with knockback (from which especially FC benefits).

Say you cast immolate or time field, but get attacked by a force commander while casting. You can't retreat because it's placed 'in a queue' after immolate - which will never cast as long as you are being knocked back during casting - and thus lose control and will die.

And should your commander get revived they will cast the spell. Only 5 minutes too late. Hurray!

So there is a blob of shootas and it is attack-moving, as they are wont to do, so you move your mans into good cover and attempt to throw a grenade. The blob realizes it is in danger and reacts by shooting at your mans. You hit X, thinking the grenade explosion will be so sweet as your men scurry unimpeded back to base because the blob has stopped to kill your mans right where you had selected the grenade to land. Suddenly, you realize that the one member of the squad smart enough to handle grenades was knocked down by some part of the blob during the throwing animation. He picks himself up, a couple other squad members dust him off and fix his hair, he goes to throw the grenade again and is subsequently knocked down.

By this point you are either:

A.) Staring at your screen dumbfounded, your finger still slowly and methodically pressing the X button, hoping as the man with the grenades dies (more than likely second to last as most of the members of the squad are lying in pools of their own blood) that his surviving squadmates will realize their folly and begin to retreat (how silly)

B.) Screaming and tearing at your keyboard, having just realized the squad is going to die to either the men shooting at them or the AG horms/FoFin' Banshees/Waaghin' Sluggas who realized that they dont even need to chase these idiots all the way back to their base for the kill, they aren't running!, and there is nothing you can do

C.) Alt tabbed bitching on the forums knowing full well there is nothing you can do to save your pathetic army what are you an idiot why didn't you just blob melee

CanisAquilus

I love this game... some shits overpowered, so what?

Every RTS is always going to to have broken overpowered strategies which need to be patched out. I've come to terms with that. Relic should keep working on it obviously, but I'm not going to freak if some dude beats me with mass ag horms.

Pancake

CanisAquilus wrote: »

I love this game... some shits overpowered, so what?

Every RTS is always going to to have broken overpowered strategies which need to be patched out. I've come to terms with that. Relic should keep working on it obviously, but I'm not going to freak if some dude beats me with mass ag horms.

You're far too much of an apologist, Plasma Aquilus.

Gammarah

Hey guys, early game SM question. Should I upgrade my two scout squads with shotties, grenades, or both? It seems like grenades are really wonky in when they decide to hit, but is there a way to allow them to counter melee squads somewhat reliably? Or should I stick to shotties+tacs?

Akira

SM doesn't have a T1 melee counter.

Faffel

But no you're right, it's just a bunch of whiners who don't know how to think for themselves and strategise like "real" players do.

The best part of my post is when I said that.

Freakinchair

Akira wrote: »

SM doesn't have a T1 melee counter.

T1 Melee counter is - Use FC, Buy a tactical marine squad, hope the other guy is retarded and kite/tank with your FC. Spam to T2. The SECOND YOU CAN DO IT upgrade your tacs with plasma cannons and your FC with a hammer. Thats all you can do (I find).

(SM suck why do i play them)

subedii

Faffel wrote: »

But no you're right, it's just a bunch of whiners who don't know how to think for themselves and strategise like "real" players do.

The best part of my post is when I said that.

Then what point are you trying to make? Because the only thing I could see coming from your post was that the complaints were somehow invalid because people were going to whine anyway.

Dr.Tongue

Freakinchair wrote: »

Akira wrote: »

SM doesn't have a T1 melee counter.

T1 Melee counter is - Use FC, Buy a tactical marine squad, hope the other guy is retarded and kite/tank with your FC. Spam to T2. The SECOND YOU CAN DO IT upgrade your tacs with plasma cannons and your FC with a hammer. Thats all you can do (I find).

(SM suck why do i play them)

The correct answer is to play a real race. 8-)

Faffel

subedii wrote: »

Faffel wrote: »

But no you're right, it's just a bunch of whiners who don't know how to think for themselves and strategise like "real" players do.

The best part of my post is when I said that.

Then what point are you trying to make? Because the only thing I could see coming from your post was that the complaints were somehow invalid because people were going to whine anyway.

I find it flattering that you tried to put some purpose or cause into my post, but you're trying too hard to read between the lines and find offense. Try reading it with your head, not your weeping heart. I simply said that people who play DoW2 whine about the game, but play it while constantly whining about it. It reminded me of playing WoW. It amuses me. What more could that post possibly have meant? Calm down.

subedii

Faffel wrote: »

subedii wrote: »

Faffel wrote: »

But no you're right, it's just a bunch of whiners who don't know how to think for themselves and strategise like "real" players do.

The best part of my post is when I said that.

Then what point are you trying to make? Because the only thing I could see coming from your post was that the complaints were somehow invalid because people were going to whine anyway.

I find it flattering that you tried to put some purpose or cause into my post, but you're trying too hard to read between the lines and find offense. Try reading it with your head, not your weeping heart. I simply said that people who play DoW2 whine about the game, but play it while constantly whining about it. It reminded me of playing WoW. It amuses me. What more could that post possibly have meant? Calm down.

And what I said was that I don't actually hate the game, but I can't really play it online anymore because it's so broken.

But you're right, I did take your post more seriously than you intended.

Mustachio Jones

Goomba wrote: »

Faffel wrote: »

DoW2 reminds me of World of Warcraft. A bunch of people who claim to hate the game but play it all the time regardless, while whining at every opportunity.

I know of at least two people that complain about it while not playing it, in addition to all of the people that tried te beta and didn't buy it because they went all retarded on the balance.

This was me. I loved the shit out of the beta, waited to see what changes they made to the retail release, saw the fucked up shit they did, and waited. I couldn't help but jump on the $25 steam sale and the promises certain people (DoA) made to me about how 1.5 would improve things.

I hate you all (DoA). I want my money back. Or a game that isn't such a steaming pile of shit. Y'know, when Tyranids were actually fun to play, or at least difficult.

I hate everything.

subedii

Mustachio Jones wrote: »

Goomba wrote: »

Faffel wrote: »

DoW2 reminds me of World of Warcraft. A bunch of people who claim to hate the game but play it all the time regardless, while whining at every opportunity.

I know of at least two people that complain about it while not playing it, in addition to all of the people that tried te beta and didn't buy it because they went all retarded on the balance.

This was me. I loved the shit out of the beta, waited to see what changes they made to the retail release, saw the fucked up shit they did, and waited. I couldn't help but jump on the $25 steam sale and the promises certain people (DoA) made to me about how 1.5 would improve things.

I hate you all (DoA). I want my money back. Or a game that isn't such a steaming pile of shit. Y'know, when Tyranids were actually fun to play, or at least difficult.

I hate everything.

You're just like a WoW player Jones.

:whistle:

Faffel

For my own part I wasted $60 on DoW2 because I realized I'll never be able to wrap my head around RTS games.

Mustachio Jones

the difference here, with me and a WoW player, is that I'm not really playing the game much at all. I played the beta every chance I got, because hey, it was pretty great. I figured I'd take the risk and see what's up with it now, and having gotten all right with Eldar, respectively, I just can't force myself to play on the internet. I'd gladly play with you guys as a group, in like a 3v3 or 2v2, but against random people on the internet I just don't see the reason to get myself angry. I've got plenty of other things I have to be angry about. DoW2 doesn't need to be one of them. also dicks. Mostly dicks.

So yeah. tl;dr i confirm i'm just like a wow player.

subedii

Faffel wrote: »

For my own part I wasted $60 on DoW2 because I realized I'll never be able to wrap my head around RTS games.

How come? (Serious question)

Faffel

No idea. I just can't handle micromanaging all those units.

Gammarah

Freakinchair wrote: »

Akira wrote: »

SM doesn't have a T1 melee counter.

T1 Melee counter is - Use FC, Buy a tactical marine squad, hope the other guy is retarded and kite/tank with your FC. Spam to T2. The SECOND YOU CAN DO IT upgrade your tacs with plasma cannons and your FC with a hammer. Thats all you can do (I find).

(SM suck why do i play them)

I use the Apothecary. Have I lost already?