The Second Annual Phalla Awards
A long time ago, in a small kingdom off the coast of England called "Phalla" there lived an awards show host. This was no ordinary awards show host, because he had died roughly one year ago. Some might whisper of his magical powers, others might call him a wizard, but the king knew the man was a god. And this god traveled in time blah blah blah one fourth of the village were actually vampires blah blah blah some stuff happened and then the awards show started again!
"Once again, the first award I am pleased to announce to you is titled '
The Second Annual Phalla Award for the Most Hilarious Single Blunder or Meltdown by a Player or Team in a Single Game', and it should be fairly self explanatory. Also up for the vote is
Best Player Who is Also a Moderator or Admin."
Here, the host stopped for a moment and squinted at the teleprompter.
"This looks familiar. I've just been asked if I said goodbye to my wife this morning. Is this some sort of repeat joke? I demand that the perpetrator of this hurglghglhgl."
The zombie games host toppled over, a zombie-killing sword stuck in his stomach. The people of Phalla were used to shenanigans like this and therefore unimpressed. They immediately began discussing their votes for the first award.
Rules
- Vote will close at 10 PM EST every day for a few weeks
- Vote in an appropriate color for each award and make it clear which award you are nominating or voting for if there are two.
- "Don't be inactive. I require two posts a day, including votes. I will not be culling the inactives on a daily basis, but I will get around to dealing with them eventually. If you can't be around on a given day, letting me know beforehand will increase your chances of avoiding my wrath. If you can't play anymore, let me know so I can find a replacement." (Note: not a real rule.)
- Role PMs may not be quoted, only paraphrased. Anonymous contact is prohibited. (Note: a real rule.)
- Any external boards that are created for the purpose of talking about this game must be posted and mocked.
- This is about roasting and toasting, not flaming and shaming.
- All actions are to be sent to thorgot. Clarification requests should be posted in the thread or PMed to the GM (thorgot). Questions about vote counts should probably be sent to MrBlarney even though he has nothing to do with this.
- If you received a PM, you have to participate. If you didn't receive a PM, you have to participate. If you don't participate, you will regret it!
- I won't be able to (don't want to) come up with 15 narrations on my own, so various people will help me out. If you would like to be one of these people, PM or IM or post in the thread. Please.
- Games that are in progress may not be discussed.
Player List
Everybody who has ever played.
Miscellaneous
These awards cover the past year. All games ending before May 4, 2008 are disqualified. All games ending on or after May 4, 2008 are eligible. All games ending after June 3rd, 2009 are disqualified. This might provide a tiny bit of overlap with last year, but will make things more consistent if this is ever run again. All CF main games starting with Phallastar Phallactica, all minis starting with Twisted Metal, and all D&D games starting with Gods and Mortals qualify. The two SE++ games in 2008 qualify, as does the moderator game.
All dates and games above are ± days in a week - sqrt(who cares, this is for fun).
This post and the post after it have complete (to the best of my knowledge) lists of games.
Here is a link to the previous awards.
ScheduleWeek 1 (6/4 to 6/10)
- Most Hilarious Single Blunder or Meltdown by a Player or Team in a Single Game (The Lady Eri Award) (Nominations)
B:L and the Evil Eight for revealing before the game was over
- Most Veteran Play by a New Player (The Least Dumb New Guy Award) (Nominations)
Spectrum in Suikoden Phalla
- Memest Meme (The Everything's Peaceful Prettiest Princess MSPaint Battle Spectre Spectrum Five Award) (Nominations)
Inactivus Hungers
- Best or Most Exciting or Coolest or Most Epic Role Claim or Reveal (The Athan Award) (Nominations)
Spectrum 5 reveal from Gumpy's Super Robot Mini
- Best Game Ending, Closest Game Ending (The Traitors Unite Award and The Dewey Defeats Truman Award) (Nominations)
Best: Snow Crash
Closest: Captain Planet Phalla and Galactic Senate Phalla
- Most Successful Gambit or Betrayal (The Oh-Shit-He-Was-A-Traitor Award) (Nominations)
iamtheaznman in World of Phalla: Online Craft for convincing the village to vote out the seer who had claimed he was evil and then becoming network head
- Best Writing By a Host or Co-Host (The Bestselling Novelist Award) (Nominations)
Quoth for Folie à Plusieurs, Innsmouth, Discworld, etc
Week 2 (6/11 to 6/18)
- Best Abuse of Mechanics or Powers (The Oh-God-What-Was-The-GM-Thinking Award) (Nominations)
Burnage for Homing missiles in King of Phallaters, Vlad in Max Payne Phalla, Orochi in King of Phallaters
- Most Innovative Game Mechanics (Nominations)
Infidel and MrBlarney for Legend of the Red Dragon
- Worst Player (Nominations)
minigunwielder
- Worst Game (Nominations)
24: Bioterror
- Best Host (Nominations)
MrBlarney & Infidel, Tag Team Deluxe
- Best Player (Nominations)
B:L
- Best Game, Mini (Nominations)
The Thing (Kay)
- Best Game, Main (Nominations)
Vampire: The Masquerade: Gehenna (cj iwakura)
Bonus Awards (in some order and timeframe according to whim)
- Best Player Who is Also a Moderator/Admin (The We Love You Tube Award) - Thanatos
- Most Mentally Disturbing Narration or Post - Dac Vin's cake story about kime
- Best / Worst Post Restriction - Hylianbunny in Gehenna
- "Most Deaths in a Day" (The Intentionally Left Vague Award) - Varcayn's bomb in Phallaman X (14 deaths on that night, or 21% of the players)
- Worst Role Claim or Reveal (The Nobody's Buying What You're Selling Award) - Gandalf_the_Crazed's constant stream of reveals during Chrono Phalla.
- Most Hilariously Complicated or Confusing Phalla - Suikoden
- Best Proboards (The Mind-Raping Eye-Vomiting Color Scheme Award) - Fantastical Castle
- Least Repulsive Player (The Real Prettiest Princess Award) - lonelyahava
- Most Over the Top Player aka Best PrecisionK Imitation (The God Emperor Award) - precisionk
- Most Typecast Player (The "I'm Always Good! Honest!" award) - Rainfall for Most Likely to Go Inactive if They're Not Evil
- Most Hardcore Player - MrBlarney and/or B:L
- Lifetime Achievement for Dying on Day One - kime
- Most Enduring / Publically Known Grudge - Thetheroo/Maximus
- Worst Team (Village, Mafia, or Other) - The village in Phallaman X
- Best Avatar and/or Signature - Infidel
- Best Team - Spectrum 5 in Disgaea
- Best Losing Team - The Fiends/Destruction (Nocturne)
- Best New GM Alt - Deep Thought from Ultimate Phalla of Ultimate Destiny (DevoutlyApathetic)
- Most Improved Player - kime
People Who Will Be Narrators List
Questions I have for you
Am I missing any critical awards? Feel free to let me know, because there is still time to fit them in.
The awards will follow last year's model. Nominations will occur one day. Any nomination which is seconded will be available for vote the next day. Please provide a link (if applicable or available) to give people a more informed choice.
Do you want to narrate a night? Of course you do. PM me.
Posts
(Insert image here, let me dig it up)
My power is to be here, with you. This is actually amazing, so be amazed.
Alright, with that out of the way, let's have a party.
3DS Friend Code: 3110-5393-4113
Steam profile
That was beautiful.
I think it's really only hilarious if you won that game...
like me. :P
Didn't you kill me? The innocent bystander who could do nothing to anyone and only wanted to live? That was mean!
I'm not sure if I grudged you for that, or if it was even you. But I'm missing a grudge in the Timeline one since Burnage left, so I think I'll try to kill you.
3DS Friend Code: 3110-5393-4113
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I dunno, what's your stance on wharfs?
Invitation to The First Thirty-Ninth Annual Phalla Awards
Recipients: Aegis, B:L, Burnage, Corp.Shephard, FunkyWaltDogg, James, Zerinan, Zzulu
I *did* try to day one kill you to be funny in the Chrono Trigger Phalla.
Which resulted in all sorts of interesting connections...
3DS Friend Code: 3110-5393-4113
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How... how do you still have that invitation?
Fun fact: I used that exact same image for my dorm's Oscar party Facebook event.
I like the nomination one day, vote the next day format from last year. Definitely helps to get the ideas rolling, so there is sufficient time to think about all the games from the previous year rather than just the most recent ones. If someone votes early, then someone else thinks of a better candidate, that first person might not be around to change their vote... so for the best fairness, I like the format used in the previous year.
they don't it be like it is but it do
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FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
White FC: 0819 3350 1787
Oh man, I forgot about that. I wouldn't really say it was hilarious, though.
Hi 5 for last minute voting hijinks to kill them all! Good times!
Also, are we nominating yet?
If so:
I would like to nominate MGW for selling out his entire faction in the Innsmouth Phalla... but he's banned and hence unable to collect his award.
So I therefore nominate Lady Eri for the big WTF she caused in the Gehenna phalla.
Edit: I don't know why I spoilered the nomination.
Most Hilarious Single Blunder or Meltdown by a Player or Team in a Single Game: Gosling
I can't fight it.
Grudge on Thetheroo!
You know I should get the Dying on Day One achievement
Yeah some relevant links for awards would really help out with voting.
Summary: Eri gets voted off for flavor text reasons, is later raised from the dead for one post. In this post, she convinces the village that the unseerable baddie is good, who then becomes the network head and crushes the village under his heel. After the game ends, it is revealed she did this quite intentionally out of spite.
You are letting Team Philosopher down, Spork.
Also, I nominate B:L and the Evil Eight for revealing themselves in the Pokemon phalla... only to find out the game wasn't over yet.
Anyways, for the Gehenna one, Lady Eri was good and voted out. Someone had the ability to brign people back for one last post after their death. Eri was quite... perturbed at being voted out by the village, so she basically said something to the effect of, "I think <so-and-so> is bad, but I know MundaneSoul is good. Trust him."
So Mundane became the leader of the network. And Mundane was evil.
Hahaha that was a funny one too. Too bad it didn't make a difference .
Was he actually unseerable, or did no one take the time to seer him? I remember it as the latter, everyone else thinking someone else would seer him and not taking the time to, but I'm not sure.
3DS Friend Code: 3110-5393-4113
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http://forums.penny-arcade.com/showthread.php?t=90307 = Gosling meltdown, it's in there somewhere.
Here's the phalla in which it happened
It begins with Gosling rejecting his duty as a vilager and going dada. It ends in tears.
EDIT: ...Well mine has info in it, Spork man!
People - we need to get back to work on the Wiki! Chop chop!
Note: None of these famous events are there... yet.