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Captain Marvel (not safe for 56k)

Garlic BreadGarlic Bread i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm aRegistered User, Disagreeable regular
edited April 2007 in Graphic Violence
Captain Marvel is like Superman except he's made of magic. According to Sarah Silverman, Jesus is magic, so Captain Marvel is made of Jesus. And, like Jesus, Captain Marvel is well hung (although in a different sense!)

There's two Captain Marvel series going on right now. There's The Trials of Shazam, starring Freddie Freeman as he becomes the new Captain Marvel. It is not that bad.

There's also Shazam and the Monster Society of Evil, which is about the origin of Captain Marvel. It is by Jeff Smith and it is awesome and adorable.

They are working on a Captain Marvel movie. So far it looks to be atrocious, since the director (Peter Segal) hasn't made any good movies, and the writer (John August) hasn't really made anything good except for Big Fish. Plus, rumors say they want Jake Gylenhaallllslsldy as Captian Marvel and that's terrible.
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Garlic Bread on
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    SentrySentry Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Jake Gyllenhall is a great actor. Captain Marvel is a crappy super hero. Sounds perfect to me.

    Sentry on
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    wrote:
    When I was a little kid, I always pretended I was the hero,' Skip said.
    'Fuck yeah, me too. What little kid ever pretended to be part of the lynch-mob?'
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    DondumsDondums Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    If Jake plays him Captain Marvel won't be able to quit Bobby.
    See what I did there?

    Dondums on
    internet
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    Garlic BreadGarlic Bread i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a Registered User, Disagreeable regular
    edited March 2007
    Neliwood wrote: »
    If Jake plays him Captain Marvel won't be able to quit Bobby.
    See what I did there?

    who the fuck is bobby

    Garlic Bread on
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    Garlic BreadGarlic Bread i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a Registered User, Disagreeable regular
    edited March 2007
    Sentry wrote: »
    Jake Gyllenhall is a great actor. Captain Marvel is a crappy super hero. Sounds perfect to me.

    Captain Marvel could fuck your mom, both grandmoms, and your dad at the same time while your uncle sits there and jerks off to the video

    so you shut your goddamn mouth

    Garlic Bread on
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    Garlic BreadGarlic Bread i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a Registered User, Disagreeable regular
    edited March 2007
    the best part is, those 15 shots are only from the Paul Dini/Alex Ross book

    Garlic Bread on
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    DondumsDondums Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Keith wrote: »
    Neliwood wrote: »
    If Jake plays him Captain Marvel won't be able to quit Bobby.
    See what I did there?

    who the fuck is bobby

    He's in one of those pictures you posted. ;o

    Dondums on
    internet
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    HooraydiationHooraydiation Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Keith wrote: »
    Neliwood wrote: »
    If Jake plays him Captain Marvel won't be able to quit Bobby.
    See what I did there?

    who the fuck is bobby

    Does it even matter?

    Gay joke, lol!

    I guess Jake would be appropriate if they wanted an adult who could inject a kind of naive boyishness into their portrayal of Captain Marvel, but he just seems kind of short.

    Hooraydiation on
    Home-1.jpg
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    deadonthestreetdeadonthestreet Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Captain Marvel is kinda dull, but the Jeff Smith series is good.

    deadonthestreet on
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    CariblueCariblue Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Patrick Warbuton would be great, or is it Warburton.

    Captain Marvel is great and you never forget it.

    Cariblue on
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    Garlic BreadGarlic Bread i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a Registered User, Disagreeable regular
    edited March 2007
    Cariblue wrote: »
    Patrick Warbuton would be great, or is it Warburton.

    Captain Marvel is great and you never forget it.

    Warburton

    and he's not quite as hung as Captain Marvel but he's there

    but he doesn't really have the classic voice for it

    Garlic Bread on
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    Garlic BreadGarlic Bread i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a Registered User, Disagreeable regular
    edited March 2007
    I guess Jake would be appropriate if they wanted an adult who could inject a kind of naive boyishness into their portrayal of Captain Marvel, but he just seems kind of short.

    Jake doesn't look the part and isn't big or imposing enough and also sounds like a retard whenever he talks

    Garlic Bread on
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    Regina FongRegina Fong Allons-y, Alonso Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Captain Marvel isn't that well hung, it's just that other male superheroes are either really, really poorly hung, or just wearing snug dance belts (which is really a sensible thing to wear under tights, if you don't want people staring at your junk).

    Regina Fong on
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    Garlic BreadGarlic Bread i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a Registered User, Disagreeable regular
    edited March 2007
    jeepguy wrote: »
    Captain Marvel isn't that well hung, it's just that other male superheroes are either really, really poorly hung, or just wearing snug dance belts (which is really a sensible thing to wear under tights, if you don't want people staring at your junk).

    junk7.jpg

    Garlic Bread on
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    HooraydiationHooraydiation Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Keith wrote: »
    I guess Jake would be appropriate if they wanted an adult who could inject a kind of naive boyishness into their portrayal of Captain Marvel, but he just seems kind of short.

    Jake doesn't look the part and isn't big or imposing enough and also sounds like a retard whenever he talks

    How about Rock Hudson?

    rockhudson1.jpg

    E27%200719%20Rock%20Hudson%20&%20Doris%20Day%20-%20Laughing%20-%20Leo%20Fuchs.jpg

    sjff_03_img1144.jpg

    Rock_Hudson_in_Giant_trailer.jpg

    Some of these might be screwed up, but I'm not going to bother with photobucket.

    Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if they try to turn Captain Marvel into 13 Going On 30 with Jake standing in for Jennifer Garner.

    Hooraydiation on
    Home-1.jpg
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    CariblueCariblue Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Keith wrote: »
    Cariblue wrote: »
    Patrick Warbuton would be great, or is it Warburton.

    Captain Marvel is great and you never forget it.

    Warburton

    and he's not quite as hung as Captain Marvel but he's there

    but he doesn't really have the classic voice for it

    He was really good in those American Express Superman commercials.

    Plus I think if they did this movie it would have a comedic tone, which he would fit in nice for.

    The way Superman/Shazam First Thunder and the new Shazam mini it seems like he might be a good fit.

    Cariblue on
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    Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    It had to be said. Alex Ross does a scary Captain Marvel. That fucking smile just makes me curl into a fetal position and cry.

    Calamity Jane on
    twitter https://twitter.com/mperezwritesirl michelle patreon https://www.patreon.com/thatwronglove michelle's comic book from IMAGE COMICS you can order http://a.co/dn5YeUD
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    Regina FongRegina Fong Allons-y, Alonso Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Keith wrote: »
    jeepguy wrote: »
    Captain Marvel isn't that well hung, it's just that other male superheroes are either really, really poorly hung, or just wearing snug dance belts (which is really a sensible thing to wear under tights, if you don't want people staring at your junk).

    junk7.jpg

    If this weren't a family-friendly forum I would post a counterpoint showing what I consider "well-hung" to be.

    Regina Fong on
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    SASA Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Mar-Vell.jpg

    :?:

    SA on
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    BalefuegoBalefuego Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    I miss Captain Marvel's cute yet creepy relationship with Stargirl, I want him back in JSA.

    Balefuego on
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    DaedalusDaedalus Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    SA wrote: »
    Mar-Vell.jpg

    :?:

    I always found the fact that there were two different Captain Marvels, one for DC and one for Marvel, hilarious.

    Daedalus on
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    Toji SuzuharaToji Suzuhara Southern CaliforniaRegistered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Two Captain Marvels? I don't think I have enough fingers to count them all.

    Toji Suzuhara on
    AlphaFlag_200x40.jpg
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    DarkPrimusDarkPrimus Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    ITT Keith slowly comes to terms with his sexuality.

    DarkPrimus on
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    Synthetic OrangeSynthetic Orange Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    And both DC and Marvel's Captain Marvels (now) have screwed up insane families. LOVE IT.

    Synthetic Orange on
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    Regina FongRegina Fong Allons-y, Alonso Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    DarkPrimus wrote: »
    ITT Keith slowly comes to terms with his sexuality.

    Win.

    Regina Fong on
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    Bad KarmaBad Karma Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    SA wrote: »
    Mar-Vell.jpg

    :?:

    What the hell is that loser doing in this thread? :winky:

    Bad Karma on
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    Bad KarmaBad Karma Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    On the action figure side of things, theres a surprisingly large amount of choices for good ol Cap.

    You've got your First Appearance Captain Marvel (Pretty good)

    Kingdom Come Captain Marvel (Not to shabby)

    Justice Captain Marvel (Awesome)

    dcd-J-S-05.jpg

    The new Shazam! series coming out in November (Tres Awesome)

    IMG_4694.jpg

    IMG_4691.jpg

    IMG_4690.jpg

    Look...it's Hoppy!

    And for you 1/6 scale collectors...another Captain Marvel (Beaucoup Awesomer)

    capmarvel.jpg

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    Synthetic OrangeSynthetic Orange Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    They... they took away his package!

    Synthetic Orange on
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    JoeUserJoeUser Forum Santa Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Hey! Where's Uncle Marvel?

    JoeUser on
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    Bad KarmaBad Karma Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Jesus christ people.

    Bad Karma on
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    MiSTieOtakuMiSTieOtaku Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Cooooool!

    A Mr. Mind figure!

    MiSTieOtaku on
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    SentrySentry Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    I don't really see what about Captain Marvel makes him so interesting. Granted, I've only read him when he's been in other comics, but everything I've seen of him just seems so blah...

    The only thing interesting about him to me is Black Adam... but even he seems pretty one-dimensional.


    So, enlighten me! Or we can keep talking about his schlong... whichever.

    Sentry on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    wrote:
    When I was a little kid, I always pretended I was the hero,' Skip said.
    'Fuck yeah, me too. What little kid ever pretended to be part of the lynch-mob?'
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    bobgorilabobgorila Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    He's a child, in a massively super-powered magical adult body.

    With a massively super-powered magical wang.

    He's as strong as superman, but has no weaknesses and can also call down magical fucking lightening.

    Did I mention the massive magical wang?

    Also, read Kingdom come.

    bobgorila on
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    GimpyBoyGimpyBoy Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Personally I always liked Marvel because the stories were fun and imaginative. I mean, a worm scientist? Excellent. But on top of that there was this element that Superman could never capture...

    You can't ever be an alien from another world. Supes was born special and unique, and no matter how much you wanted to be him you weren't flying around as a10 year old. But, Billy was just any kid. He was kid given a magic word that turned him into a superhero. And that was incredibly awesome.

    And that's the reason he was outselling superman for a good period there.

    Sometimes the newer stories tend to ignore that old magic and fun and just make him superman part 2, but sometimes it sneaks through. Johns is pretty good at bringing the fun around. And the Smith series is very much like the olden days.

    GimpyBoy on
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    HooraydiationHooraydiation Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    His primary weakness is his adolescent mind.

    And I guess that's supposed to make him interesting.

    But anyway, I thought Rock Hudson was a good choice

    Hooraydiation on
    Home-1.jpg
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    saint2esaint2e Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    I really wanted to get into the Trials of Shazam, but I found it boring, so I dropped it. I should've picked up the one Jeff Smith is doing as people have raved about it.

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    Garlic BreadGarlic Bread i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a Registered User, Disagreeable regular
    edited March 2007
    jeepguy wrote: »
    DarkPrimus wrote: »
    ITT Keith slowly comes to terms with his sexuality.

    Win.

    where were you guys like 7 years ago

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    PiptheFairPiptheFair Frequently not in boats. Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    His primary weakness is his adolescent mind.

    And I guess that's supposed to make him interesting.

    But anyway, I thought Rock Hudson was a good choice

    he is also dead from the aids

    also, captain marvel is a bigger dick than superman, and I don't mean the wang

    PiptheFair on
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    Garlic BreadGarlic Bread i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a Registered User, Disagreeable regular
    edited March 2007
    ohmygodnotm4.jpg

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    RedeemerRedeemer Registered User regular
    edited March 2007
    Anjin-San wrote: »
    It had to be said. Alex Ross does a scary Captain Marvel. That fucking smile just makes me curl into a fetal position and cry.

    Thank you

    Redeemer on
    25jyxzr.jpg
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    Garlic BreadGarlic Bread i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a Registered User, Disagreeable regular
    edited March 2007
    I find it charming

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