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Nerd rage and other stories about douchebaggery

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Posts

  • jedikuonjijedikuonji Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    I was at a small game store for a Raw Deal tourney. The event fell through (not enough players) but the store manager didn't want me to feel like I had wasted my time driving to his store (about 30 minutes) so he told me about the magic tourney going on that night. Basically you pay your entry fee and build a deck out of the store commons boxes.

    I hadn't played magic in about 8 years, but figured why not go for it since I was already there. At this point in the night everyone at the store was a regular except for myself and had been working on their decks for about an hour. I decided to go with an old deck build from way back (black and white, low cost cards) and spend about 6 minutes making the deck, most of which was spent looking through the cards for the specific ones I needed.

    Round 1 starts. My first question: How many cards do I get. Some of the regulars overhear this and laugh. My opponent, a high school kid, answers and we get going. I win, pretty easily, and he and I chat about the match and how it went. Very pleasant overall and the last enjoyable match I play all night.

    Round 2 brings me another win and my opponent complains that my win was all luck. Yes, it's luck your deck is filled with high cost cards and even with 4 land out you could barely play any cards.

    Rounds 3 and 4 bring more of the same as round 2, it's all luck, or my deck is BS or whatever.

    Round 5. I win again and the guy takes the loss so well that he throws his deck back in a commons box and leaves the store for the night.

    There were a few more rounds after that and I ended up winning out, taking 1st place. At this point the only people still talking to me are my 1st round opponent and the manager, everyone else is muttering to each other and glaring at me. I collect my winnings (a couple of starters of whatever the current set was and some random loose cards) and give them, along with the deck I played, to the high school kid and head home amused that my ancient garbage deck can still do the job.

    TL;DR After 8 years of not playing, I win a M:TG tourney and cause store wide nerd rage.

    jedikuonji on
  • mantis23mantis23 Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    There isnt a whole lot of raging in this story but I was reminded of it and had to share because ten years later its still told between my friends as legend.

    Back in the day at my local arcade, Killer Instinct was THE game. It seemed like the entire gaming crowd in school was obsessed with KI. I was in the arcade with my friend who was one of the best kids in our school at the game. Well, we walk in one day and there was an asian guy who nobody knew, and he was just flat out destroying EVERYONE at KI. and he did some move or combo that was new, My friend had never seen it before and he asked the guy how he did it, which prompted an exchange that seems straight out of a cheesy 80's movie.

    "oh, you want to know how I did this move?"

    "yeah, will you tell me?"

    "suuuuuure, I'll tell you...........................if you beeeeeeat meeeeeeee"

    It was seriously all dramatic like, with the long pause and everything. he may have even pretended to stroke a non existent beard.

    So my friend played him, and lost, badly. repeatedly. and the guy refused to tell him how to do that move which cause many small fits of nerd rage as my friend kept putting in quarters and losing. 30 minutes later the guy left , and we never saw him at any of the area arcades again.

    mantis23 on
    0y6kx4rwubui.jpg
  • PataPata Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    jedikuonji wrote: »
    TL;DR After 8 years of not playing, I win a M:TG tourney and cause store wide nerd rage.

    That's like something I'd expect to be the first episode of some crazy card game anime.

    Pata on
    SRWWSig.pngEpisode 5: Mecha-World, Mecha-nisim, Mecha-beasts
  • descdesc Goretexing to death Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    mantis23 wrote: »
    There isnt a whole lot of raging in this story but I was reminded of it and had to share because ten years later its still told between my friends as legend.

    Back in the day at my local arcade, Killer Instinct was THE game. It seemed like the entire gaming crowd in school was obsessed with KI. I was in the arcade with my friend who was one of the best kids in our school at the game. Well, we walk in one day and there was an asian guy who nobody knew, and he was just flat out destroying EVERYONE at KI. and he did some move or combo that was new, My friend had never seen it before and he asked the guy how he did it, which prompted an exchange that seems straight out of a cheesy 80's movie.

    "oh, you want to know how I did this move?"

    "yeah, will you tell me?"

    "suuuuuure, I'll tell you...........................if you beeeeeeat meeeeeeee"

    It was seriously all dramatic like, with the long pause and everything. he may have even pretended to stroke a non existent beard.

    So my friend played him, and lost, badly. repeatedly. and the guy refused to tell him how to do that move which cause many small fits of nerd rage as my friend kept putting in quarters and losing. 30 minutes later the guy left , and we never saw him at any of the area arcades again.
    peimei_2_3953.jpg

    desc on
  • RocketSauceRocketSauce Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    I seem to do pretty well on the mounted guns in COD4 multiplayer. Racked up a 31 kill streak sitting behind one. I always seem to get shit from other teams in the lobby after I repeatedly kill the same players dumb enough to step in front of me.

    RocketSauce on
  • SkannerJATSkannerJAT Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    The closest I come to nerd rage is with CoD4. When i die I tend to smack my girlfriends ass pretty hard. Oddly enough, she has taken to getting on the headset to listen to people and sits right next to me while I play.......

    SkannerJAT on
  • TaranisTaranis Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    I beat the shit out of my room mate in college because he slapped me on the back of the head after I purposely teamkilled him in Halo.

    I got put on probation at the school, but it was worth it.

    Taranis on
    EH28YFo.jpg
  • SipexSipex Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    My friend had a rant related to this, we play halo 3 online after our D&D sessions so we get some shit talk online and this one time someone calls out and he just blows up.

    "You know what?! If I use rockets I'm a 'Rocket Whore', if I use beam swords I'm a "Sword Newb"! Shotgun Cunt, No Skill, Assault Newb, Pistol Fag, who cares?!"

    He then got the rockets out anyways and pwned while they continued to complain.

    That said, he's really bad for nerd rage when the other team is winning but he gets over it immediately after the match (the match tends to contain a lot of swearing though) so we're good.

    Sipex on
  • NewresNewres Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Speaking of fighting games Smash Brothers was the only thing that got me to rage out once. I was playing against my brother who was using Marth and me Mewtoo. He is better than me at the game, but he ended up basically doing the equivalent of a perfect in the game against me. Now fair enough, such things happen, but we were so concentrating on the game (he to kill me as well as possible, me to get at least one knock out) that right after the win his controller got unplugged. Of course not missing his chance he went on and on about the fact that he beat me without even having the controller plugged in. It was the only time I have thrown my controller to the ground.

    Newres on
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  • Dr. FaceDr. Face King of Pants Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    I am normally very calm when playing games so I don't have many good stories. Only 2 stick in my mind. First one is grade school. I was fucking KING of Street Fighter 2 on SNES. Beat it with no deaths on the hardest difficulty to achieve the BEST ending. I only did it twice though as it wasn't easy. I would have done it 3+ times if not for my little brother. The last time I attempted it I had made it to Sagat and was starting round two when I hear my brother running down the hall toward me. He knows better then to bug me when I am playing SF2 - I took it very seriously. I hear him slow down and tiptoe past me. In his eagerness to tiptoe very dramatically like some kind of cartoon character to emphasis his carefulness he trips on the SNES cord and unplugs it. He gasps and a I hear a very quiet, "oh no". All I can see is red. I could hear the controller squeaking in my hands as I try to squeeze all my hate into it. My brother runs and hides under the kitchen sink. I just sat there squeezing the controller till a couple of the buttons popped from the pressure. When we were older he told me that he ran under the sink when I started turning colors. More of a purple then red is how he tells it. I never attempted the feat again and when my mom got pissed because we had to get a new controller I told her it was my brother's fault and he didn't refute my claim and was grounded for a week.

    Later, after college, I played a lot of Morrowind on the PC. I was thoroughly sucked in by this game and would lose track of time very easily. Problem was that my game had a habit of crashing at infrequent but always horrible times. This crash would also invariably destroy the Autosaved game file. This fun little glitch maliciously and purposefully waited till I was engrossed in the game to the point I would stop making occasional saves of my own. It would let me play like this for a good hour or two (sometimes longer on a weekend) and then stab be in the crotch by showing me the desktop with no error message. This usually resulted in incoherent animalistic yelling at the monitor till my throat was raw. I broke two keyboards and almost totaled my computer desk when I would usually start pounding my fists like a mad ape while I screamed. My girlfriend (now wife) who lived with me only saw it once because I didn't think she was home. She was kinda scared and almost left the apartment. After we talked about it I started to ween myself off that wonderful drug.

    Dr. Face on
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  • RocketSauceRocketSauce Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    I will scream at the TV when I play the vidja games, but that's about it. When I'm playing with other people the worst thing I'll do is cuss a lot.

    RocketSauce on
  • firewaterwordfirewaterword Satchitananda Pais Vasco to San FranciscoRegistered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Heh, that reminded me of when my friends and I used to play the old Mega Man NES games. Anytime one of use managed to get to a boss, standard protocol was for everyone else to leave the room so as to minimize distractions for the player. Seems kind of retarded in retrospect, but those games were hard!

    firewaterword on
    Lokah Samastah Sukhino Bhavantu
  • Local H JayLocal H Jay Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    oh i rarely get too abusive with people online, but street fighter makes me cry bullshit like no tomorrow.
    "FUCK YOU AKUMA THROW ANOTHER FIREBALL I FUCKING KNEW IT YOU CUNTBUTT"

    Local H Jay on
  • LeitnerLeitner Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Taranis wrote: »
    I beat the shit out of my room mate in college because he slapped me on the back of the head after I purposely teamkilled him in Halo.

    I got put on probation at the school, but it was worth it.

    I was haloing with some guys from the basketball team. After having gone silent apart from a ton of quiet cursing a guy got up and swung a Duke down between two of us, after a few swings to build up momentum and stormed off. We're still not sure if he had just tried to brain us with it (and those things were literal bricks).

    Guy was always super angry over everything though.

    Leitner on
  • firewaterwordfirewaterword Satchitananda Pais Vasco to San FranciscoRegistered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Most of my friends are way, way into Winning 11. I like it OK, but combined with the fact that I'm pretty crap at it and they're constantly playing, I generally don't do so well. Anyway, I'm still surprised no one has ended up bloody as a result of some of these games. The worst so far was a friend punching wall and nearly breaking a knuckle after loosing his fifth game in a row.

    Same goes for DoA games. I used to be pretty damn good with DoA2, but I can't put up that much of a fight in 3 or 4. I still play, because I think they're fun as hell, but I don't expect to win. In college, every once in awhile a bunch of us would end up hammered, playing rounds of DoA3 for dollars, which was great fun until you realized that not only have you gotten the shit kicked out of you repeatedly, but you were down 14 bucks for the pleasure.

    firewaterword on
    Lokah Samastah Sukhino Bhavantu
  • AuburnTigerAuburnTiger Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    I don't tend to rage too often; sure I get angry, but not to the point where I go crazy or break anything.

    Except for this one time while playing Grifball on Halo 3. I'm convinced it was lag, because I could not get a hammer kill to save my life. Over and over again for a few games in a row, I would constantly get killed.

    I slammed the controller down, not realizing how hard I threw it. It shattered.

    So yeah, I didn't play Halo for a few months as self-imposed punishment.

    AuburnTiger on
    XBL: Flex MythoMass
  • SliderSlider Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    In college, I literally wasted my life [and GPA] away while playing Dartmud: a f**king ridiculously difficult perma-death bullsh*t mud.

    [
    Souls were literally created and destroyed by this game. In character (IC) alliances were often loosely based on "out of character (OOC)" relationships, which were strictly forbidden.

    A few guys at my school played the game and were the ones who got me addicted. One guy was fairly beefy in shape and resembled a football player.

    One night, I broke etiquette and started communicating OOC with another player, discussing IC alliances and I happened to mention the names of my friends who played with me.

    Well, this beefy guy found out and threw a sh*t fit. He came to my room and rage attacked my door for hours, but I wouldn't let him in for obvious reasons.

    He finally left, but returned with a much more demure demeanor and asked me to let him in. Thinking he had finally regained his sanity, I opened the door and sat down. He flew into the room and pushed me over, flipping the chair in the process and making me look like a total pussy.

    I ignored him for a few weeks after that, thinking, "What type of crazy person would react like that over a stupid game?"

    Slider on
  • Pi-r8Pi-r8 Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Pata wrote: »
    jedikuonji wrote: »
    TL;DR After 8 years of not playing, I win a M:TG tourney and cause store wide nerd rage.

    That's like something I'd expect to be the first episode of some crazy card game anime.

    That sounds like a pretty cool anime, actually.

    Pi-r8 on
  • King RiptorKing Riptor Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Pi-r8 wrote: »
    Pata wrote: »
    jedikuonji wrote: »
    TL;DR After 8 years of not playing, I win a M:TG tourney and cause store wide nerd rage.

    That's like something I'd expect to be the first episode of some crazy card game anime.

    That sounds like a pretty cool anime, actually.

    I actually wrote a treatment for a webcomic very similar to that premise. Never found an artist though.


    I figured I should mention my one moment of Nerd rage regarding Smash brothers.

    I was Ike who was my main at the time.

    One of my friends picked the DK Jungle Climber stage EIGHT TIMES it was winners pick and his Wii so I didn't get a say in this.

    needless to say I was stubborn at first then determined then the last time I flipped. I Killed myself stormed out of the room and went home to draft a " Ban these fucking stages or I'll gore you" document which has been in use since.

    King Riptor on
    I have a podcast now. It's about video games and anime!Find it here.
  • HKPacman420HKPacman420 Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Sipex wrote: »

    "You know what?! If I use rockets I'm a 'Rocket Whore', if I use beam swords I'm a "Sword Newb"! Shotgun Cunt, No Skill, Assault Newb, Pistol Fag, who cares?!"


    215163514_2ReHp-L-2.jpg


    Any weapon that isn't a pistol is constantly bitched about by the 'elite' players of the Half-Life mod "The Specialists".

    HKPacman420 on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • wenchkillawenchkilla Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    The best thing about video games is, despite years and years of them, I always seem to suck (I spent like half an hour on one room in Jak & Daxter last night, wtf?).

    My first nerd rage moment is from when I was 7 or 8 and was playing Super Mario World. Ahh, sweet SMW. I was in a castle I'd never gotten to before when my mom started calling me to go to bed, and I had made it to within feet of the boss door when she got tired of me ignoring her, and unplugged the SNES. I flew into a rage, throwing the controller at the ground. then jumping up and attempting to hit her. I was really short, so, this didn't work so well. I am sure the Nintendo was confiscated for quite some time. She still makes fun of me about it to this day.

    Me and my best friend Chris drove up to his parents' vacation condo in the summer before Senior year of high school. I figured hey, I'll bring Final Fantasy: Tactics and a Playstation along, since it would be a good 3 days before his parents got there and brought their boat, and the pool was the only entertainment we had. We played that game for hours, but Chris was more interested in watching than playing. To be more specific, he was more interested in being the backseat general. He would give me loose advice on every tactical decision. If my action had a positive outcome, he would praise himself, for he was kind enough to share his tactical genius with my feeble mind. If it had a negative outcome, he would criticize me for being an idiot and not listening to him. On every single thing. After two days of this nonstop, I screamed, threw the controller at him, and lunged myself at his throat. We wrestled around angrily for a bit, then I got both of us a soda, and we proceeded to play Duck Hunt and make fun of the dog.

    I did not know the true language of nerd rage until my friend in the military sent me an online invite for some Call of Duty 4 with his Navy pals. In a matter of minutes I realized while I had thought myself a skilled tradesman of profanity, I was an infantile apprentice compared to the artificers of language these men truly were. And I read Penny Arcade religiously.

    wenchkilla on
    gamingsig.jpg
    PSN/XBL: dragoniemx
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