I was at a party, and this dude we all didn't like passed out, so my friend comes running into the kitchen going "Douchebag is asleep!"
We immediately start rummaging around the kitchen, until we found a large bag of marshmallows.
After about a minute in the microwave, we had a soupy bowl of melted marshmallows. My friend grabbed a spoon, and this sticky mixture was poured down the back of this kids pants.
He woke up the next morning to find his ass cemented shut with a bowlful of hardened marshmallow.
I was at a party, and this dude we all didn't like passed out, so my friend comes running into the kitchen going "Douchebag is asleep!"
We immediately start rummaging around the kitchen, until we found a large bag of marshmallows.
After about a minute in the microwave, we had a soupy bowl of melted marshmallows. My friend grabbed a spoon, and this sticky mixture was poured down the back of this kids pants.
He woke up the next morning to find his ass cemented shut with a bowlful of hardened marshmallow.
I hope this is true.
Not the worst thing we've done to someone, but yea, complete truth.
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StraightziHere we may reign secure, and in my choice,To reign is worth ambition though in HellRegistered Userregular
edited March 2007
It's better if you added in finishing touches like an unzipped fly or an unrolled condom nearby.
Once I was walking down to the bus stop after school, and this homeless man asked me if I had any change. I responded that I didn't, and I was sorry. He lurched to his feet, punched me in the face and screamed "SEE YOU IN A YEAR!"
Why buy the vagina when you can get the milk for free?
mmmm vagina milk
I was dating a girl for 5.5 years (2.5 of which we lived together) and then got married, I've been married ALMOST a year and we're thinking about splitting up suddenly. Thing is neither one of us seems to be too upset about the idea. We talked about it last week and we started discussing who gets what. She is 23 and I am 24, we started dating in high school and never really got to do the whole adult dating thing so I think part of it is that we don't have anything to compare "us" against. Also, we're more just best friends then anything and while that's nice to have in a relationship it probably shouldn't be the only thing.
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I hope this is true.
Not the worst thing we've done to someone, but yea, complete truth.
no, but I do work in home health.
Which is a different can of worms altogether.
Electronic composer for hire.
Truth or lie?
Truth, actually.
oh okay
carry on
TRUE
fixed to reflect my life
"You been he-ah fo ow-ah. You go home now!"
they are lovely jewels of sex
i have no problem eating womens out if they are probesrlew cleaned
I hope to marry one someday.
Ask it how it's day went.
ask the venters if i am pretending or not
I still feel bad about it, too
i mean the crab did
my crab
Why buy the vagina when you can get the milk for free?
mmmm vagina milk
I was dating a girl for 5.5 years (2.5 of which we lived together) and then got married, I've been married ALMOST a year and we're thinking about splitting up suddenly. Thing is neither one of us seems to be too upset about the idea. We talked about it last week and we started discussing who gets what. She is 23 and I am 24, we started dating in high school and never really got to do the whole adult dating thing so I think part of it is that we don't have anything to compare "us" against. Also, we're more just best friends then anything and while that's nice to have in a relationship it probably shouldn't be the only thing.
TL;DR - I'm likely getting divorced.
you dick you just edited that, WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT
I think that egg salad BLT I had earlier today is coming back to haunt me.
one day, for some reason I went the normal way.
when I got to class everyone was talking about a guy who had caught fire at the gas station that I would normally pass.
I knew the owner of the place so I asked her about it later.
aparently the guy was filling up gas and his friend lit a cigarette next to him. the guy caught fire but not the smoker.