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[miniphalla] PhallaKart: Mini Circuit - Tryclyde obtains the Mini Cup

InfidelInfidel HereticRegistered User regular
edited November 2009 in Critical Failures
phallakart.gif

A miniphalla brought to you by Infidel.
(What is a miniphalla? See here.)

The Goal

Win the Mini Cup!

Everyone in Mario land is in it for the fun of competition, so while a personal victory is nice it doesn’t matter if you come in first because everyone had a good time!

Unless of course the tyrannical Wart has his minions take control of their subconscious minds in order to win the Mini Cup which is actually made from an artifact that serves as key to Subcon which would free Wart to unleash his dark imaginings on the world.

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Not so good times.


The Game

The game will last four days. Period. Four races in the Mini Circuit.

Each race will take place on a different course, which may impact the gameplay in some fashion. Courses and effects will be announced race by race.

Winner of the Mini Circuit wins the Mini Cup. If one of Wart's minions win the Cup, they win and everyone else loses. If they fail, they lose and everyone else wins.

If all of Wart's minions are eliminated before the final race, play will continue for standings and bragging rights!


The Vote

Disqualification vote will determine which racer is to be eliminated from the circuit each race. Something about engine trouble.

Blue sparks vote will determine who is in the lead for the race. Other factors will come into play, but the idea is that the vote is a way to pull ahead. You cannot vote for yourself. The total speed, based on the votes received that day and modified by items and actions, will determine the order of finish. The top eleven racers will place and earn points. Points are cumulative through-out the game. Unless otherwise indicated, vote modifications are referring to this vote.

Points are awarded as such: 15 for first, followed by 12, 10, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.

Votes must be in the correct colour (red and deepskyblue) and bolded to be counted. Edited posts will not be counted, don't edit a post with a vote in it. No retraction format as none are needed. Inactive racers will be fished up by Lakitu and disqualified, so vote.

Vote close will be at 9pm CST. (7pm PST / 10pm EST / 3am GMT)


The Roles

Every racer has an identity. Said identity is not indicative of alignment.

Identity may come into play in the mechanics, such as item tables and favoured tactics or what have you.


The Actions

Each player can perform one action each race or take none at all. Send all actions via PM to Infidel.

Use Item – If you have an item you may choose to use it that race.

Slipstream – Choose another racer and mooch off their speed. Watch out for bananas!

Drift – Give yourself a boost in speed that race. You gain a 2 vote boost. Risky, making you more vulnerable to bad effects.

Bump – Hit another racer with your kart, knocking them about. Typically a vote deduction. Might be more than you can handle.

Hoard – Snap up item blocks, giving you an item the next race. Only means to have more than one item. Beware fakes!


The Items

Each racer can obtain one item per race based on chance and overall position. All racers have a chance to start the circuit with one item. Unless otherwise indicated racers cannot obtain more than one item at a time. Many items have a chance of success involved. If an item has multiple methods of use then it must be specified in the action order. There is no item trading.

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Green Shell – Shoot ahead at another racer to hinder or behind to ward off any drafters.
  • [forward] Choose a racer with more votes than you, a hit will deduct 2 votes.
  • [behind] Hit anyone slipstreaming you, a hit will deduct 2 votes. Chance to negate an incoming shell.
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Red Shell – Shoot ahead to take a racer out of commission or behind in defense.
  • [forward] Choose a racer with more votes than you, a hit will eliminate.
  • [behind] Hit anyone slipstreaming you, hit will deduct 2 votes. Chance to negate an incoming shell.
banana.png
Banana – Drop behind you to wipe out drafters, deducting 2 votes. Will negate an incoming shell.

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Fake Block – Drop a fake item block, one racer taking a Hoard action may be targeted, a hit will deduct 2 votes.

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Mushroom – You gain a 2 vote boost.

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Boo – That fucking ghost, target a racer and immediately steal their item. (Host availability permitting.)

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Bob-omb – It’s dangerous to be in your vicinity!
  • [forward] The racer immediately ahead of you in the vote count will be eliminated.
  • [behind] The racer immediately behind you in the vote count will be eliminated.
  • In the event of multiple racers being eligible, the victim will be RNG.
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Bullet Bill – You gain a two place boost in the race results.

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Star – You are immune to attacks and gain a 2 vote boost.

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Thunderbolt – Removes one vote from every other racer and any racer with unused items will lose them.

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Blue Shell – The vote leader and anyone within one vote will count as zero votes cast for the race.


Special versions of these items may or may not occur.


The Rules

Not much really aside from the standard stuff. I don't care if you role call because it won't break anything. If you create any proboards, send me the link or face my wrath. I love proboards.

I expect a decent amount of clarifications to clog up this section soon enough.
Infidel wrote: »
If the blue shell just zeroes out the vote leader and close competition, how are you going to handle it when like thirty fucking blue shells go flying at once?

Clarification denied.

Actually, I think I'll deny clarifications in this fashion:

Blue shell.
Infidel wrote: »
Can we trash items to free up our item slot without using our action?

In the interest of stratergerizing, yes, it is allowed.
Infidel wrote: »
Spectrum wrote: »
Do you have to target someone with the Fake Block or will it autohit anyone use a Hoard action at random?

You do not target the Fake Block, correct. It will "attack" at random.
Infidel wrote: »
Spectrum wrote: »
Order of actions? Do all items kick in to effect simultaneously? How is the vote count for item usage determined? (pre or post items?)

Effect of a tied vote?

Order of actions? Blue shell, disqualifications, items, blue shell. Blue shell.

Vote count for targeting purposes is naturally according to official thread count. If any place where an exact tie occurs, tie break will be by RNG.
Infidel wrote: »
Spectrum wrote: »
Are eliminated racers eligible for circuit victory?

Ie, mafia member somehow manages to get 1st place in the first 3 races before being eliminated, so they have 45 points. Are they still a threat to win?

A racer must complete all four races to win the Mini Circuit.
Infidel wrote: »
Does the vote trickle down?

The vote is absolute. There is no trickle.


The Signups

Signup in something festive if you wish to race, there are 24 spots for this mini.
  1. Daius
  2. Arivia (Hammer Bro) - disqualified (race 1)
  3. Dunadan019
  4. FunkyWaltDogg
  5. lonelyahava (Wario) - bob-ombed (race 1)
  6. kime (Kritter) - disqualified (race 4)
  7. MrBlarney
  8. eecc
  9. Robos A Go Go
  10. Zandracon (Daisy) - disqualified (race 3)
  11. adventfalls
  12. Toxic Toys (Donkey Kong, seized by Fryguy) - red shelled (race 1)
  13. simonwolf
  14. LoserForHireX (Koopa Troopa) - shyguy'd (race 2)
  15. Jaenther (Diddy Kong) - disqualified (race 2)
  16. B:L (Bowser) - red shelled (race 1)
  17. [strike]crimsoncoyote[/strike] Gumpy
  18. enlightenedbum
  19. Spectrum
  20. shalmelo
  21. Gandalf_the_Crazed
  22. Tiphareth
  23. [strike]Raakam[/strike] Darian
  24. Burnage (King K. Rool) - red shelled (race 1)
Standings
  • 1st - MrBlarney (34) - (Bowser Jr., siezed by Tryclyde)
  • 2nd - FunkyWaltDogg (27) - (Baby Mario)
  • 3rd - shalmelo (26) - (Luigi)
  • 4th - Gumpy (24) - (King Boo)
  • 4th - Tiphareth (24) - (Mario)
  • 6th - eecc (23) - (Dry Bones, siezed by Mouser)
  • 7th - Spectrum (22) - (Toadette)
  • 8th - Robos A Go Go (16) - (Dixie Kong)
  • 9th - Gandalf_the_Crazed (14) - (Toad, siezed by Clawgrip)
  • 10th - adventfalls (11) - (Waluigi)
  • 11th - Daius (10) - (Peach)
  • 11th - Dunadan019 (10) - (Yoshi)
  • 13th - Darian (8) - (Baby Luigi)
  • 14th - simonwolf (5) - (Koopa Paratroopa)
  • 15th - enlightenedbum (2) - (Birdo)
WART'S VICTORY
Reserves
  • [strike]Gumpy[/strike]
  • Delmain
  • samurai6966
  • [strike]Darian[/strike]

The Narrations

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Infidel on
«13456725

Posts

  • Options
    Dunadan019Dunadan019 Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    confirming myself

    Dunadan019 on
  • Options
    FunkyWaltDoggFunkyWaltDogg Columbia, SCRegistered User regular
    edited November 2009
    I have arrived

    FunkyWaltDogg on
  • Options
    lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava ~~She/Her~~ Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    edited November 2009
    !signup

    lonelyahava on
  • Options
    kimekime Queen of Blades Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Hurray!

    I'm amazing at Mario Cart, by the way.

    kime on
    Battle.net ID: kime#1822
    3DS Friend Code: 3110-5393-4113
    Steam profile
  • Options
    FunkyWaltDoggFunkyWaltDogg Columbia, SCRegistered User regular
    edited November 2009
    If the blue shell just zeroes out the vote leader and close competition, how are you going to handle it when like thirty fucking blue shells go flying at once?

    FunkyWaltDogg on
  • Options
    InfidelInfidel Heretic Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    You're not amazing at spelling it, though.

    Infidel on
    OrokosPA.png
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    MrBlarneyMrBlarney Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    !sign up

    Mmm, production values.

    MrBlarney on
    4463rwiq7r47.png
  • Options
    ecco the dolphinecco the dolphin Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    sign up!

    ecco the dolphin on
    Penny Arcade Developers at PADev.net.
  • Options
    InfidelInfidel Heretic Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    If the blue shell just zeroes out the vote leader and close competition, how are you going to handle it when like thirty fucking blue shells go flying at once?

    Clarification denied.

    Actually, I think I'll deny clarifications in this fashion:

    Blue shell.

    Infidel on
    OrokosPA.png
  • Options
    FunkyWaltDoggFunkyWaltDogg Columbia, SCRegistered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Fuck youuuuuuuuu

    FunkyWaltDogg on
  • Options
    kimekime Queen of Blades Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Infidel wrote: »
    You're not amazing at spelling it, though.
    ...... *glare*

    I'm aiming for you!

    (....Can you be targeted?)

    Can I be Yoshi?

    kime on
    Battle.net ID: kime#1822
    3DS Friend Code: 3110-5393-4113
    Steam profile
  • Options
    InfidelInfidel Heretic Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    kime wrote: »
    Infidel wrote: »
    You're not amazing at spelling it, though.
    ...... *glare*

    I'm aiming for you!

    (....Can you be targeted?)

    Infidel is Kira.

    Infidel on
    OrokosPA.png
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    kimekime Queen of Blades Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Infidel wrote: »
    Infidel is Kira.
    Eeexcellent.

    'cause, you know, Kira loses. And it counts as L winning.

    kime on
    Battle.net ID: kime#1822
    3DS Friend Code: 3110-5393-4113
    Steam profile
  • Options
    Robos A Go GoRobos A Go Go Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Nothing better to do!

    Robos A Go Go on
  • Options
    ZandraconZandracon Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Bang

    Zandracon on
  • Options
    lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava ~~She/Her~~ Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    edited November 2009
    I understand none of this!

    My 3 year old niece beat me at the one game of MarioKart i've played.

    But what's the worst that can happen.

    Other than you know, not getting to be Kirby.

    lonelyahava on
  • Options
    FunkyWaltDoggFunkyWaltDogg Columbia, SCRegistered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Can we trash items to free up our item slot without using our action?

    FunkyWaltDogg on
  • Options
    kimekime Queen of Blades Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Can we trash items to free up our item slot without using our action?
    If you want to be a loser.

    kime on
    Battle.net ID: kime#1822
    3DS Friend Code: 3110-5393-4113
    Steam profile
  • Options
    adventfallsadventfalls Why would you wish to know? Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    I'm in.

    adventfalls on
    NintendoID: AdventFalls 3DS Code: 3454-0237-6080
  • Options
    InfidelInfidel Heretic Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Can we trash items to free up our item slot without using our action?

    In the interest of stratergerizing, yes, it is allowed.

    Infidel on
    OrokosPA.png
  • Options
    Toxic ToysToxic Toys Are you really taking my advice? Really?Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Zoom Zoom Zoom!

    Toxic Toys on
    3DS code: 2938-6074-2306, Nintendo Network ID: ToxicToys, PSN: zutto
  • Options
    lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava ~~She/Her~~ Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    edited November 2009
    !Toxic


    you are not the kid from the commercials.

    lonelyahava on
  • Options
    simonwolfsimonwolf i can feel a difference today, a differenceRegistered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Sign up!

    simonwolf on
  • Options
    InfidelInfidel Heretic Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    That makes 11 more to go.

    Infidel on
    OrokosPA.png
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    lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava ~~She/Her~~ Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    edited November 2009
    I can try and scare people into it.


    although starting tomorrow night might be better for me

    lonelyahava on
  • Options
    InfidelInfidel Heretic Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    I'm not rushing it, it's only been an hour or so and I am finishing role PMs still. :P

    Infidel on
    OrokosPA.png
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    lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava ~~She/Her~~ Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    edited November 2009
    lol

    well then FINE.

    I'll be a good little kitten and leave everybody alone and go back to working on Nano

    lonelyahava on
  • Options
    LoserForHireXLoserForHireX Philosopher King The AcademyRegistered User regular
    edited November 2009
    I'm not entirely sure how this works, but i like it

    LoserForHireX on
    "The only way to get rid of a temptation is to give into it." - Oscar Wilde
    "We believe in the people and their 'wisdom' as if there was some special secret entrance to knowledge that barred to anyone who had ever learned anything." - Friedrich Nietzsche
  • Options
    JaentherJaenther Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    I want to play!

    Jaenther on
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    B:LB:L I've done worse. Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    !And I already have a KIRBO themed avatar ready

    B:L on
    10mvrci.png click for Anime chat
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    SpectrumSpectrum Archer of Inferno Chaldea Rec RoomRegistered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Do you have to target someone with the Fake Block or will it autohit anyone use a Hoard action at random?

    Spectrum on
    XNnw6Gk.jpg
  • Options
    InfidelInfidel Heretic Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Spectrum wrote: »
    Do you have to target someone with the Fake Block or will it autohit anyone use a Hoard action at random?

    You do not target the Fake Block, correct. It will "attack" at random.

    Infidel on
    OrokosPA.png
  • Options
    SpectrumSpectrum Archer of Inferno Chaldea Rec RoomRegistered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Order of actions? Do all items kick in to effect simultaneously? How is the vote count for item usage determined? (pre or post items?)

    Effect of a tied vote?

    Spectrum on
    XNnw6Gk.jpg
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    crimsoncoyotecrimsoncoyote Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    beep beep

    crimsoncoyote on
  • Options
    InfidelInfidel Heretic Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Spectrum wrote: »
    Order of actions? Do all items kick in to effect simultaneously? How is the vote count for item usage determined? (pre or post items?)

    Effect of a tied vote?

    Order of actions? Blue shell, disqualifications, items, blue shell. Blue shell.

    Vote count for targeting purposes is naturally according to official thread count. If any place where an exact tie occurs, tie break will be by RNG.

    Infidel on
    OrokosPA.png
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    enlightenedbumenlightenedbum Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    !sign up

    enlightenedbum on
    Self-righteousness is incompatible with coalition building.
  • Options
    SpectrumSpectrum Archer of Inferno Chaldea Rec RoomRegistered User regular
    edited November 2009
    oh wait, it's the weekend, I can play and be dead again before the week

    Are there ramps and other terrain boosters?

    Spectrum on
    XNnw6Gk.jpg
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    shalmeloshalmelo sees no evil Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    I'm-a Wario. I'M-A gonna win!

    I once played Mario Kart 64 against a roommate to determine who got what furniture when we moved out. True story.

    shalmelo on
    Steam ID: Shalmelo || LoL: melo2boogaloo || tweets
  • Options
    Gandalf_the_CrazedGandalf_the_Crazed Vigilo ConfidoRegistered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Sure, why not.

    Gandalf_the_Crazed on
    PEUsig_zps56da03ec.jpg
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    TipharethTiphareth Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Time to get suspicious!

    Tiphareth on
This discussion has been closed.